Honey Doll
Practically Family
- Messages
- 523
- Location
- Rochester, NY
Working Mother does NOT equal Bad Mother
Reading some of the posts here there seems to be a current of belief that being a working mother necessarily means that you are cutting your kids short and that the choice you have made to work is incorrect/bad/immoral-- or that if you didn't have to work, you just shouldn't.
My comments come from my own personal experience as I am both a working professional career gal and a mother of two preschoolers (daughter age 4 and son age 2). I can honestly say that I am a better mother and my children are happier, more content because I am a working mother. My children are incredibly intelligent, social, charismatic little people. I could not possibly on my own sitting at home provide for them the stimulation that they receive through the high quality daycare center they are enrolled in. They are personable, well socialized, good mannered. My daughter is learning Spanish, German and Sign language. She receives instruction in ballet, gymnastics and goes to the library and other weekly field trips. She gets to play with her friends and receive a pre-k education. She has from an early age interacted and come to love adults and children of many backgrounds, races and beliefs.
My children have cousins who have been strictly in a stay at home setting who are very sweet and good natured, but shy and socially withdrawing by comparision.
I do not pull my kids out of bed at the crack of dawn and ship them off in their pjs. I do not leave them lingering at daycare long into the night. My daycare is a block from my office. When they were infants, I came over twice a day to nurse them and stayed home with them one day a week for the first year. When they have bad days-- I am called and am there within minutes. When the kids just need a bit more of me-- we take days off together. I was not given flexibility by my work-- I demanded it and got it. It cost me a one year delay in partnership, but I am there now. I got a remote computer connection from home on my laptop and surprisingly, most of my partners followed suit and hooked up from home to so that they could spent more time with their families. If my hours are lackluster, I can pick up a project from home here and there, or work during naps on days the kids are home sick or otherwise. I was a mold breaker and have proven to my colleages that being a mom does not mean you are half in the door, half out and that working from home or flexible hours is a legitimate alternative.
If I stayed at home, I would be an unfulfilled woman and would not have the same emotional resources to devote to my children that I do now. Frankly, I'm better at my job because I am a mom. It has helped me establish a firm sense of priority and organization. You simply have to be organized to do it all.
And yes, I have a home cooked meal on the table every night at 6 pm sharp, so don't be late for dinner.
Honey Doll
Reading some of the posts here there seems to be a current of belief that being a working mother necessarily means that you are cutting your kids short and that the choice you have made to work is incorrect/bad/immoral-- or that if you didn't have to work, you just shouldn't.
My comments come from my own personal experience as I am both a working professional career gal and a mother of two preschoolers (daughter age 4 and son age 2). I can honestly say that I am a better mother and my children are happier, more content because I am a working mother. My children are incredibly intelligent, social, charismatic little people. I could not possibly on my own sitting at home provide for them the stimulation that they receive through the high quality daycare center they are enrolled in. They are personable, well socialized, good mannered. My daughter is learning Spanish, German and Sign language. She receives instruction in ballet, gymnastics and goes to the library and other weekly field trips. She gets to play with her friends and receive a pre-k education. She has from an early age interacted and come to love adults and children of many backgrounds, races and beliefs.
My children have cousins who have been strictly in a stay at home setting who are very sweet and good natured, but shy and socially withdrawing by comparision.
I do not pull my kids out of bed at the crack of dawn and ship them off in their pjs. I do not leave them lingering at daycare long into the night. My daycare is a block from my office. When they were infants, I came over twice a day to nurse them and stayed home with them one day a week for the first year. When they have bad days-- I am called and am there within minutes. When the kids just need a bit more of me-- we take days off together. I was not given flexibility by my work-- I demanded it and got it. It cost me a one year delay in partnership, but I am there now. I got a remote computer connection from home on my laptop and surprisingly, most of my partners followed suit and hooked up from home to so that they could spent more time with their families. If my hours are lackluster, I can pick up a project from home here and there, or work during naps on days the kids are home sick or otherwise. I was a mold breaker and have proven to my colleages that being a mom does not mean you are half in the door, half out and that working from home or flexible hours is a legitimate alternative.
If I stayed at home, I would be an unfulfilled woman and would not have the same emotional resources to devote to my children that I do now. Frankly, I'm better at my job because I am a mom. It has helped me establish a firm sense of priority and organization. You simply have to be organized to do it all.
And yes, I have a home cooked meal on the table every night at 6 pm sharp, so don't be late for dinner.
Honey Doll