The Era -- Day By Day

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Yep, common-law marriage actually has legal status in the state of New York. Isn't that right, Frank and Nora?

"Work hard, kids, and some day you too might be Miss Rheingold!" -- Jinx.

"Got any beer?" "NOW I KNOW who you are!"

"They're FAKES! LEAD FAKES!"

Because all famous financiers summer off the Swamp Road.

"Look, the school board pays me $900 a year, and I'm too frail for the WACs so let's just forget the whole thing."

Never bring a gun to a shoe fight.

Josie can't wait for television, she'll be a big hit on the wrestling circuit.

"Even worse, he gave her nylons!"

Movies on paper.

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Augie Bergamo, Emil Verban, and Myron Hayworth. I can't wait till we see Sigmund Jacucki!

 

[Fading Fast]

"Heeh," offers Alice, scratching the match on the seat of her overalls. "Lemme help...."

Freakin' perfect.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Nooo, Oi don't need to buy a baaaathtoob!" snaps Ma, addressing a shifty-eyed man leaning over the counter as he sips an egg cream. "What makes ye think Oi need a baathtoob! We gaaaht woon roit upstarrs loike civilized people! Oov all th' bloody fool things to..." But her thought is interrupted as Jimmy Leary shoulders in, the screen door banging behind him. "Oi, James," greets Ma as he tosses the canvas bag on the counter. "C'moovar here, Oi gaaht a jaaahb far ye." She leads him over to the corner, out of earshot of the bathtub salesman. "Oi needjee t'do soom investaaaargatin' farr me," Ma continues, her voice a husky whisper. "Oi needjee t'goo doon t' Bensonharrst an'.." "Aw, Ma," protests Jimmy. "T'is ain' got nut'n t'do wit'tat daughteh'ra yehs, does it? She makes me noivous." "No, no, no," snaps Ma, "an' Oi doon'twan'chee should let'arr knoow yer even oovar thar! This is t'do with th' boy, with William. A gang'a hoodlums beat'im oop on th' street an' left'im farr dead!" "Some ot'eh mawb?" queries Jimmy. "Why t'ey goin' afteh'rim? We got no dealin's in Bensonharrst?" "How doo Oi know?" scowls Ma. "Maybe sooombaaahdy ye fatharr crossed. Looks t'me loike a waaaarnin'. Waaaar looky they didn't take th' paaar choild far ransoom! Oi wan'chee to goo doon tharr n'look aroound. Ask soom questions. See'f'yee'cn getta handle aaahn th' men what done it. Probl'y droov oop in a car, seef'anyboody roon' thar, roon 18th Avenarr near th' school, see'f anyboody seen any strange aaahtamoobiles. An' thin repaaaart back t'me. An' farrrgoodsake, doon say noothin' t'ye faathar, he's a jitterin' wreck enoof as it is. Whin ye foind oot what Oi want t'know, repaaart back an' Oi will figyarr oot what t'do next." "Uhh," demurs Jimmy, "I dunno, Ma, we'eh kin'a shawrt-handed right now. Pop wants me t'woik inna waehhouse t'is week, he says Danny's gotta special jawb." "Oi doon' care noon'far that," snaps Ma. "Do as Oi tell ye, aaahr..." "Awright, Ma," sighs Jimmy. "Oh," ohs Ma, as he heads off. "When ye get doon with that, Oi need'jee t'take doon that screen darrr!" "Yeah, Ma," exhales Jimmy, as he bangs out...)

("Good evening, friends of the Inner Sanctum!" purrs a sardonic voice to the loud creaking of a door. "Aw, toin'a station," commands Alice. "I do'wanna heeh t'is, I can' stan'nat moideh stuff an' ghosts an' vampiehs an'awlat junk!" "Awwwwwww, Ma," laments Willie, lying flat on his back on the parlor floor, his head against the side of the radio cabinet. "Siddy, toin'a station," pleads Alice. "Awwwwwww,' laments Krause, but he complies, twisting the dial back to 660, where a braying voice announces the start of "Truth or Consequences." "Awww, Ma," pleads Willie. "T'is is stupid! Toin it back!" "It ain' neit'eh stupid," argues Alice. "People do stupid stuff an'nit's FUNNY! It ain' stupid, is it Siddy?" "Yeh," declares Krause. "Awright, awright," concedes Alice, as Krause twists the dial down to 880, just in time to hear the sinister host go into a mocking spiel for tea bags. "T'is is stupideh," she growls. "Neh," chuckles Krause...)

(Tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick...)

("I wouldn't worry, madam, this box is only half full...")

(THE BROOKLYN BROWNS! THE BROOKLYN BROWNS! THE BROOKLYN BROWNS! You know, it IS kinda catchy!)

The Dodgers season may be over, but out in Woodhaven the Bushwicks continue on, facing a team of barnstorming Major League All Stars at Dexter Park tomorrow in a doubleheader starting at 3pm. Dodger Eddie Stanky will start for the All Stars at second base, with Buddy Kerr of the Giants at shortstop. Former Dodger Bob Chipman, sent to the Cubs this year in the trade that brought Stanky to Brooklyn, will pitch for the All Stars.

(And all's well that -- uh -- ends.)

("You cow-face heel!")

(Chasing dopey millionaires? I had no idea Jane works for a tabloid.)

("Anyway, how 'bout my new invisible nightie?")

(AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE HERO DOG is not used to being a third wheel.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

Jeeezuz.

One month to go.

Atheists in foxholes.

"USHER!"

That's a mean thing to do those poor kitties.

Yep, small town life.

"Could be some other Skeezix? Nahhhh."

Besides, you know the kind of people who ride taxis.

No fool like an old fool.

And just like that, Shaky changed his name to One-Ear.

 

[LizzieMaine]

And also...

And if you'd lilke to tune in today's game, it's right here:

GO BROWNS!

 

[Fading Fast]

"T'is ain' got nut'n t'do wit'tat daughteh'ra yehs, does it? She makes me noivous."

That's awesome.

****************************************************************************

A gang'a hoodlums beat'im oop on th' street an' left'im farr dead!"

What the heck, is she losing her mind or is it part of her plan?