The Era -- Day By Day

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and...

Hmph. WESTCHESTER. IT FIGURES.

 

[Fading Fast]

("Hah!" hahs Joe, tossing the paper across his bed. "T'em Erasmus kids, whatta buncha helots. Pooeh Red Skeleton." "Ahhh," dismisses Sally, "kids t'day. We was neveh like t'at when I was at Erasmus." "Din'cha tell me," replies Joe, "t'at one time you an' a buncha yez went t'see Rudy Vallee at t' Paramount? An'ney t'rew ya out f'' rushin'na stage?" "'At was diffn't," sniffs Sally. "I mean, Rudy Vallee was not t'same as Red Skelton. Not a bit. An' we was very dignified about it." "Din'ney hafta cawla cops?" recalls Joe. "W'ann'eah a riot?" "I would'n know," huffs Sally. "I seen what I come to see, an'nen by t'time awlaresta t'at hapn't, I was gawn." "I wish I was gone outa t's hawspit'l," sighs Joe. "T'docteh says t'ey ain' gonna hafteh op'rate," reassures Sally. "T'ey'll take an'oteh x-ray t'marreh, an' if t'swellin' is gone down, t'ey might even letcha go home t'marra." "How much t'em x-rays cost?" fusses Joe. "How we gonna pay f'tis?" "Don't worry 'bout it," shurgs Sally. "I'm woikin' on sump'n." "You sueh," resumes Joe, gazing at Sally with narrowed eyes, "you din' get arrested t'at time?" "I neveh got arrested," insists Sally. "OK, well, yeah, I did get a ride inna pie wagon, but whenney got t'tstation Uncle Frank come in an tawked t't sawrg'nt, an'ney seen it his way." "He a fan'a Rudy Vallee too?" "Nah, he likes Crawsby.")
..

For a man with a concussion, Joe played a good game of verbal thrust and parry with Sally as he had her on the defensive.

...

In Chicago, Judge Rudolph Desort said today he will investigate the possibility of fraud in the quick-action divorce obtained by patent medicine heiress Merry Fahnrey, who married a Swedish waiter and used his passport to flee the country. Superior Court records indicated that Miss Fanhrey had been granted the divorce from Nils Curt Holm by Judge Desort on November 25, 1941 -- just eleven days after the two were married at Checaw, South Carolina -- on the grounds of cruelty after she, filing under the name of Mary Holm, testified that her husband had struck her twice, a statement corroborated by her maid, Maria Rush of New York. Judge Desort indicated that, if evidence of fraud is discovered, "appropriate legal action" will be taken. Miss Fanhrey, who was denied a US passport on the basis of her friendship with a Nazi diplomatic official, now resides in Argentina.
...

If she stays in Argentina, she'll have plenty of opportunity to meet even more Nazis after the war ends.

...

"Mayor LaGuardia is arrogant, conceited, tempestuous, irritable, and utterly unable to credit any opponent with any motive but the worst," writes in a reader who signs himself "Puzzled." But he also acknowledges that the Mayor has always proven himself to be an able administrator, and "he would have been an excellent choice for military administrator of Italy when we invade that unhappy country." Puzzled finds the rejection of the Mayor for that position to be "utterly disheartening," and suggests the real reason why he was turned away may be a fear that he would expose "the sorry mess of things our diplomats and generals have made of the North African political mess."
...

Once again, all true.

...

(I don't know, do OPA agents really cruise around in pairs in cars marked "OPA?" And they don't even have a siren on the hood, and a flashing sign on top?)

...

"Really, Officer, I was only trying to return this meat."

"Anonymously" posted.

...

Waaaaaaaaait for it....
...

We all know who is going to take credit for this sinking, don't we?

"Hmmhmmhmmhmmhmmhmm"

...

I'm sure there's an interesting etymology of that phrase but I'd rather not know what it is.
...

Skeezix has stopped this idiot from getting killed or captured by not letting him go back on his own twice now. If he asks a third time....

Oh, and...

Hmph. WESTCHESTER. IT FIGURES.

Once again: writing paper, pen, sit down, write stupid letter, address envelope, stamp and go out and mail. Was it really worth it "Yank Fan..."

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Ahhhhhh, s'good to be in me own bed," sighs Joe, as Stella the Cat leaps atop the comforter to investigate his return. "Docteh said y'need to take it easy still," warns Sally, "so stay innat bed t'resta t'day if y'wanna go t'woik t'marra." "Heh," hehs Joe, reaching for the Eagle. "Lookit, "Junyeh Commandos." Ya brutteh oughta sign up." "Mickey's goin' ovehseas," replies Sally after a brief hesitation. "Ma got woid f'm him yestehday. He pro'ly shipped out awready by t'time she got t'letteh." "Ah," ahs Joe. "T'manpoweh sitchiation is woise'n'ennybody t'ought." Sally's face darkens. "I'm sorry," Joe apologizes. "I shoul'na said t'at. "Gaw'dam wawr," Sally sighs.)

Papers were served yesterday on Attorney General Nathan L. Goldstein in a lawsuit challenging the constitutionality of the new state reapportionment law, calling formally upon him to defend the State's interests in one of the most disputed public controversies of the last 26 years. The lawsuit, filed in the name of Lt. David A. Fay, an instructor at the Police Academy, in his capacity as a state taxpayer, also names Governor Thomas E. Dewey, Lt. Gov. Thomas A. Wallace, and Assembly Speaker Oswald D. Heck as respondents. The challenge rests on the contention that the framers of the new law erred in giving Nassau County two senators instead of one, and Westchester three instead of two, which, the suit contends, is in violation of the law's own ratio of one senator for every 248,026 citizens. Similar reapportionment laws passed in 1906 and 1916 were subsequently ruled unconstitutional in the Court of Appeals, and the state has not been reapportioned since 1917. While Democrats in the Legislature predicted the new law would be challenged, state party leaders deny any part in Lt. Fay's lawsuit.

The Red Army of the Ukraine, fighting from newly-won positions, today beat off fresh attacks against its Izyum-Balakleya salient jutting 20 miles westward into the German lines, a prime springboard for a fresh Soviet offensive this spring. Soviet reports say the Russian troops holding and slowly expanding their foothold along the west bank of the Donets southeast of Kharkov had thwarted attempts by massed German infantry to break into the strategic salient based on the river bulge between Izyum and Balakleya. The Red Army High Command said the Soviets had killed 1200 Germans in the same area earlier in the day, in bloody fighting along the right wing of the salient.

(I wonder if the horses can get shoes?)

Air raid wardens in the Coney Island district rose to the occasion in helping to fight a fire that swept thru two frame dwellings on Neptune Avenue. Elias Vogel, on duty as Post Warden for Sector 7, 60th Precinct, spotted the flames at 2818 and 2818-A Neptune Avenue shortly after 10 AM yesterday, and turned in the alarm. Warden Vogel then rushed into the burning building and emerged carrying a one-month-old infant wrapped in blankets, while Squad Leader Nancy Dupont and Warden Genevieve Bodeker led the evacuated families to sector headquarters where they were treated for smoke, slight burns, and shock. Coffee, milk, and food were provided to the evacuees until provisions could be made to house them with neighbors.

The United Nations should at once begin negotiations, thru neutral nations, with Adolf Hitler in a last desperate effort to save the European Jews now being exterminated by the millions. This is the first of twelve sweeping proposals laid before the United States Government thru Undersecretary of State Sumner Welles by Judge Joseph M. Proskauer and Rabbi Stephen W. Wise of New York. Nine of the most influential Jewish groups in the United States, ranging from small communities of wealthy and influential individuals and Orthodox clergymen, to large aggregations of Jewish labor organizations and Zionists were jointly responsible for preparing the proposed plan of action. Although it is stated that Undersecretary Welles has given the proposals his "sympathetic attention, " cold water was dashed on the plan by British Foreign Secretary Anthony Eden, who termed the whole set of proposals "fantastic." In addition to proposing negotiations with the Nazi government, the plan also recommends that the United Nations and neutral governments work to establish sanctuary states for Jewish refugees, that the United States and Great Britain take specific steps to adjust their immigration laws to allow the entry of revised quotas of Jewish refugees, and that Great Britain take steps to open Palestine to Jewish immigration.

Grover Whalen now has a new home at the Bronx Zoo, but any resemblance to the gardenia-wearing dignitary of that name is purely coincidental. This Grover Whalen is a ram, officially owned by a Brooklyn man who raises sheep at his farming in Pawling. Howard Jones, who is director of Block Service for city Civilian Defense, raises the animals as a hobby, and when asked by the zoo to loan "his most photogenic sheep" for exhibition, he replied by sending Grover Whalen, along with two ewes named Point Rationing and Civilian Defense and two unnamed lambs.

Old Timer John P. Pfalzgraff misses the days when the people of the old Tenth Ward used to go to church on Sunday -- not to show the world how good they were, but because of the "actual comfort and relief they got out of it, and the application they made of it in their daily lives."

(What, Fitz owns racehorses now? Oh wait, different Fitz. And we go thru this every spring with Mr. Walker -- who can be counted on to hit right around .300, who is a superior defensive outfielder, who is heavily involved in the community, and is extremely popular with the fans, and every year has to fight for his job because Leo, personally, doesn't like him.)

The round-robin doubleheader at Yankee Stadium on Wednesday afternoon involving the Dodgers, Yankees, and Giants is expected to raise $100,000 for the Civilian Defense Volunteer Office. Leo Durocher, Joe McCarthy, and Mel Ott all promise they will give spectators a good look at all of their top stars in the one-day tournament to determine city baseball bragging rights for 1943, and will also use as many of their other players as possible "without turning the game into a burlesque." The arrangement of the games was determined by a drawing last week, in which Giants vice president Leo Bondy drew slips out of Mayor LaGuardia's famous black sombrero, with the result being that the Dodgers and Yankees will clash in the first game, and the Giants will take on the winner. CDVO Chairman Grover Whalen -- the man, not the ram -- declared yesterday that 50,000 general admission seats will be sold for the twinbill at $1.10 each, and a number of choice reserved seats remain available at $2.20, and boxes at $3.30 and $4.40. Tickets may be purchased at City Hall, the five Borough Halls, local branch offices of the CDVO, and other ticket agencies.

Dodger Luis Olmo is still trying to make sense of what has happened in his life over the past three months. Last winter, he was home in sunny Puerto Rico, and then he was summoned to chilly Bear Mountain to take his place among the Flock. Now, he finds himself each morning at Ebbets Field, hidden behind an enormous false beard, playing the role of one of the "Battling Beavers" baseball team in Red Skelton's new MGM comedy "Whistling in Brooklyn," now filming at the local ballyard. Olmo writes home every day to give his relatives an idea of what is happening in his life, but it is feared that when his stories are shared by the folks back home, he might be considered the biggest liar ever to come out of the Caribbean.

(Margie is in a play called "Cry Havoc?" And Havoc is, of course, Miss Gypsy Rose Lee's real name. WHO"S WRITING THIS STUFF???)

Ralph Bellamy returns to the Broadway stage this week after twelve years as a picture star, with a leading role in "Tomorrow the World," opening Wednesday at the Barrymore Theatre. Ralph went west looking for "the role he always wanted to play," and it took him over a decade to realize he'd never find it out on the Coast.

Rudy Vallee has left behind his days as the nation's number one crooner for a new career as a character actor in pictures. Making an impression last year's "Palm Beach Story," Rudy is playing another stuffy young millionaire in Paramount's "Happy Go Lucky." Rudy enjoys his comic role, but confesses that he'd like his career to take yet another turn. "I'd like," he says, adjusting his pince-nez, "to play a hated murderer."

(Red must have an iron jaw to do this without slicing his tongue off. KIDS DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME.)

("Hmph," sniffs Fat Hermann. "I'm not dazzled at all.")

(I receive no residuals for playing the role of Minnie. I just did it for laughs.)

(Coming Events Cast Their Shadows Before...)

(Look, Bill, if you can't keep your mind on your work, we'll have to let you go. Meanwhile, Irwin sits in a darkened hotel room flipping playing cards into his hat, and sympathizes. The fate of comedy relief sidekicks in a wartime world is not a happy one.)

(17 equal parts? Aw, that's easy. Wait a minute...no...um...WELL WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THAT ANYWAY!??)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News....

Meanwhile, the management at Gallagher's figures there MUST be some way to market this.

"Dear Mr. Hill, Thanks for the first good laugh I've had in months. Sincerely, H. C. Bohack."

Well, until they throw a Federal rap at him for kidnapping.

"Y'know, George, there's an easier way t'do it..."

Cousin Elmo? I thought he was in jail. Wait, check that cow for a zipper.

Well, love and a cease-and-desist letter from "Li'l Abner."

When "Gasoline Alley" began in 1918, it was a slice-of-life feature about four neighborhood buddies who got together in the alley behind their houses to fool around with cars. Twenty five years later, those now-middle-aged buddies have come full circle, sort of.

Shadow is just bitter because we don't get storylines anymore about what a dawg he is

"Hit the dirt Bert!" I'm going to say that all the time now.

"A famous Gump in each generation." Keep plugging, kid!

 

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and...

When your Victory Garden just isn't enough.

And meanwhile...

("Whatcha lookin' at, Sal?" "Eh. Jus' lookin'.")

 

[Fading Fast]

("Ahhhhhh, s'good to be in me own bed," sighs Joe, as Stella the Cat leaps atop the comforter to investigate his return. "Docteh said y'need to take it easy still," warns Sally, "so stay innat bed t'resta t'day if y'wanna go t'woik t'marra." "Heh," hehs Joe, reaching for the Eagle. "Lookit, "Junyeh Commandos." Ya brutteh oughta sign up." "Mickey's goin' ovehseas," replies Sally after a brief hesitation. "Ma got woid f'm him yestehday. He pro'ly shipped out awready by t'time she got t'letteh." "Ah," ahs Joe. "T'manpoweh sitchiation is woise'n'ennybody t'ought." Sally's face darkens. "I'm sorry," Joe apologizes. "I shoul'na said t'at. "Gaw'dam wawr," Sally sighs.)
...

The stress is getting to them, as they ignored a "What?" "Nut'n." opportunity and just spoke from the heart.

The 17 year old "madam" is out on bail and still no evidence of an adult behind it. Odd.

And in the Daily News....

Meanwhile, the management at Gallagher's figures there MUST be some way to market this.
...

The guy saw a sleazy opportunity to grab a quick $1500 (~$26,00 today, and tax free). That his name got dragged a bit through the mud is just too bad.

...

Well, until they throw a Federal rap at him for kidnapping.
....

Yes, but for today, I'm just happy Gould didn't "Raven Sherman" the kid. For some reason, probably because of all Tracy went through to save him, I feel vested in the boy and we really didn't even get to know him.

...

"Y'know, George, there's an easier way t'do it..."
...

"You'll notice I'm standing next to my partner as he explains how we sunk the sub. Of course, it was my plan and I only brought him in because I needed his opposable thumbs for the mechanical stuff, but I'm glad to share my credit with what's his name?"

...

"Hit the dirt Bert!" I'm going to say that all the time now.
...

Taffy can't catch a break.

Some incredible illustrations.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("I'm ready t'lick t'woil'," declares Joe, pushing away from the table, and reaching for his reinforced cap. "Hey," he adds, noticing that Sally is not in her usual faded housedress. "Howcome yehr awl dressed up?" "Afteh you leave f'woik," Sally replies, "I'm goin' downtown." "Loeseh's?" inquires Joe. "T'ey gotta sale on? Or awrya goin' down t' awrgue wit' Rickey again?" "I'm goin'," declares Sally, "t't U. S. Emplermen' Office. I'm gonna put my name in f'ra jawb. A wawr jawb. I dunno yet what it's gonna be, but it's gonna be sump'n. High time I was doin' my pawrt." "Ah," replies Joe, absorbing this remark. "I been layin' off lawnganuff," Sally continues. "Mickey goin' oveh now t'get shot at, an', I mean, you woikin' awllat ovehtime. Solly Pincus oveh t'eah inna midl'a who knows what. An' what'm I doin? Feed'na baby, feedn'a cat. Feed'n you. Stan'in' in line downa Bohack's. What'm I doin'? I ask ya." "Well," shrugs Joe, "I mean..." "No, I been t'inkin' about t'is a lawng time," Sally continues. "Looka t'papeh t'eah. 'AWL ABLE BODIED MEN.' T'eyeh gonna take YOU, Joe. Maybe not right away, but sooneh'a lateh. What hap'ns when'ney take YOU? What hap'ns to us? We gotta be ready. T'time has come. Leonoreh ain' a baby no moeh -- she's awmos' two. T'eah's noissreys in mosta t'ese wawr plants now, y'know, t'ey got one at Sperry's, you seen it. An' so's mosta t'utteh plants aroun'. Ann'eah's awrways Ma. T'time has come, Joe." Joe looks at Sally for a long moment, takes her hand, and nods. "Keep'm flyin'.")

A report from a special legislative committee on employment placed today in the hands of Governor Thomas E. Dewey appeared to deal a final crushing blow to New York City's hopes of receiving an increase in its taxing powers that would relieve its present budget problems. The report is the climax of a five-month long study of business and employment conditions in the city, and concludes that requests for additional taxing authority should be "held in abeyance" until the entire subject of the city's budget and tax problems can be fully examined. If the Governor accepts the findings of that report, it can be concluded that the door is "closed and bolted" against Mayor LaGuarida's request for a special legislative session that would grant additional taxation powers to cover the proposed city budget for 1943-44. An appeal by the Mayor for authority to double the sales tax or increase city tax revenue by other means has already been flatly rejected by the Legislature.

Mayor LaGuardia announced this afternoon that a ceiling on poultry prices in the city will be in effect "by nightfall." A wire received by the Mayor today from Price Administrator Prentiss Brown confirmed that an order imposing such limits is imminent, and, the Mayor warned, "there had better not be any violations." The Mayor announced that, in preparation for enforcement of the new ceilings, the Markets Department has hired fifteen additional inspectors, some of whom will operate undercover in an attempt to catch violators. Other inspectors will be on duty in markets and poultry dealers with their badges prominently displayed.

Members of sixty families were driven into the streets last night in a two alarm fire that damaged three five-story tenements in Park Slope. The fire began in the basement of the house at 201 7th Avenue, and spread up an airshaft before igniting the roofs of the adjoining buildings at 199 and 203 7th Avenue. Tenants displaced by the fire found shelter in stores along 7th Avenue and 2nd Street as firemen battled the blaze. While 201 7th Avenue sustained about $5000 in damage, most of the families were able to return to their apartments once the fire was out.

(This is how rumors start.)

Scores of Secret Service and Treasury Department agents have been deployed in Brooklyn in an effort to suppress the counterfeit gasoline ration coupon racket, following the arrests of two printers and two gasoline service station operators which uncovered "stacks of printing plates" capable of printing millions of bogus A, B, C, and T stamps. Secret Service agents noted that those plates, had been "heavily used." Printers Peter Sgroli, age 41, of 120 Stanhope Street and John A. Ferraro, age 32, of St. Albans, and gas station operators Louis J. Spatchelroth, age 54, of 150 74th Street and Michael Sabbatino, 46, of Corona were taken into custody by Federal men yesterday, after Secret Service agents retrieved a "B" coupon plate that had been tossed from a car by the two printers when they realized they were being followed. Agents will visit all local service stations to inspect stamps on hand, and will also comb OPA offices to look for cancelled counterfeit coupons.

Brooklyn's department stores, banks, neighborhood shops and even bowling alleys have gone all out in support of the Second War Loan Drive, with prominent advertising displays encouraging the purchase of War Bonds on walls and counters across the borough. "They give their LIVES," declare the posters. "YOU lend your money!"

The Navy Department has reinstated the rank of Commodore, missing in the list of naval grades since the Civil War, placing it between the grades of Captain and Rear Admiral, in a position equivalent to the Army rank of Brigadier General. Like their Army equivalents, Commodores will wear the insignia of a single silver star.

The Eagle Editorialist praises the Chief Air Raid Warden in Newark, New Jersey for his campaign to purge about 1500 "frivolous wardens" from his rolls, persons who joined Civilian Defense for the chance to "join something" and wear an insignia rather than to do any active work. "Every volunteer organization has them," sniffs the EE, "and would be better off without them."

("That 'all you can eat' thing didn't work out at Bickford's, either.")

Two young men who were dishonorably discharged from the Navy six months ago, but who continued to wear Navy uniforms in order to "impress girls" will appear in Queens Felony Court on Tuesday on charges of impersonating members of the armed forces. 18 year old Charles Lenhert of Queens and 18 year old George Parr of Buchroe Beach, Virginia admitted to Magistrate Peter Horn that the uniforms not only eased their way with women but also yielded a bounty of free drinks, free entertainment, and free lodging. The youths were tracked down after Parr's mother tracked him down in Jamaica after a search of several weeks, and alerted police. An FBI agent will attend their arraignment.

(Whatever else you may say about the war, at least it has made it easier for Van Lingle Mungo to concentrate on his job.)

(I wonder if Lee Tracy gets royalties every time a wisecracking cynical newspaperman shows up in the comics?)

(You certainly do learn a lot working for Chester Gould.)

("With what?")

("WAIT, I RECOGNIZE YOU! AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE HERO DOG! WOW! CAN I HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH??")

(Ah, OK now, Peggy is still Peggy. And in any version of the Bungleverse, Peggy can't win.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

As we've seen all along, the smartest people come from Brooklyn.

This is the second ad they've run without mentioning her actual name, which is, for the record. Sonia Gover. Apparently they don't want her running off to be a movie star like Jinx did.

"Well, all's well that ends well. When do we eat? Oh, wait, my cook was on that sub."

"Um, I'm happy for you, but I'm really uncomfortable expressing emotion. Ask Tess."

A punchline in search of a setup...

That's what happens when you try to be helpful.

Meanwhile, Private Dix considers just how hard of a blow it would take to SHUT THIS GUY UP.

Aunt Trisha isn't going to notice anything until she actually opens her eyes.

Not a thing has changed in eighty years.

You REALLY need to turn this over to the FBI.

 

[Fading Fast]

...

Mayor LaGuardia announced this afternoon that a ceiling on poultry prices in the city will be in effect "by nightfall." A wire received by the Mayor today from Price Administrator Prentiss Brown confirmed that an order imposing such limits is imminent, and, the Mayor warned, "there had better not be any violations." The Mayor announced that, in preparation for enforcement of the new ceilings, the Markets Department has hired fifteen additional inspectors, some of whom will operate undercover in an attempt to catch violators. Other inspectors will be on duty in markets and poultry dealers with their badges prominently displayed.
...

"If Bo gets out of prison anytime soon, his next job will be hauling around a cart full of blackmarket poultry meat. "

Sub Sinker Sandy*

*Trademark protected.

"You're such a jerk."

"Shut up!"

...

(I wonder if Lee Tracy gets royalties every time a wisecracking cynical newspaperman shows up in the comics?)
...

Although, Lee Tracy would kill for that jawline and curl.

Better than usual dialogue recently in "Mary Worth," plus a little comicstrip porn in panel four today.

...

Meanwhile, Private Dix considers just how hard of a blow it would take to SHUT THIS GUY UP.
...

Skeezix has a lot more patience for this guy than I had at his age.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Well!" begins Joe, as Sally sits at the kitchen table, immersed in thought. "Happy boit'day! I was gonna buy ya sump'n, but I was inneah t'Namm's, an' I seen'em signs awla 'roun, an' I t'ought about ya brutteh, an' Solly, an' awl, so I bought us anutteh bond instead." "Yeah," nods Sally, with a small smile. "Ya done good." "So!" Joe continues, nudging her shoulder. "Howzit feel?" "T'oity yeeahs ol'," Sally shrugs. "Howzit feel? I been t'inkin' about'tat since I got up. T'oity yeeahs ol'. I mean, t'ink about it -- what was I ten yeeahs ago? A kid, really. Had t'at jawb sellin' tickets at t' Patio. Din' really know nut'n about nut'n. An' I din' even know you existed. An' now look at us, ol' married couple wit' a lit'l goil." "I'd say t'at's progress," Joe replies, poking at a bowl of Wheaties. "I mean, hones'ly -- has t'eh EVEH been ten yeeahs like t'is las' ten?" challenges Sally. "T'ink about it, I mean, t' Depression was on, an'nen Roosevelt comes in wit' t' NRA anna WPA anna CCC anna AAA an' awla resta t'A's. An'nen y'go t'tmovies an' look at t' newsreel, an' Hitleh's onneah yellin' an holleh'in, an' Mussolini, an'awlat mess in Spain an' China an'awl. An' ya gotcha strikes an' ya riots an' ya teeh gas an'awlat right heeh. An' inna mid'la awlat, I meet you downa Roselan', an' one t'ing leads t'anot'eh..." "Yeah," nods Joe. "I like t'at pawrt." "An'nen we got t' Woil's Faieh, an'na Woil' Series -- hey, remembeh t'at p'rade? Izzeah eveh been any'ting like t'at? I mean, a million people. How many people inna woil' c'n say t'ey seen a million people awlt'get'eh in poission?" "Um," ums Joe, thinking it over. "At least a million, I guess..." "An'nen it seems like about five minutes ago, we got Leonoreh. An' now look at'teh --runnin' arouna house, tawkin' a mile a minute. I mean, you eveh t'ink about it? What kin'a woil is it gonna be when SHE's toinin' t'oity? I betcha won't be able t' rec'onize it!" "Nah," replies Joe. "A lotta t'ings, I betcha, gonna be jus' t'same as now. I mean, t'Bridge ain' goin' no place, izzit? Nobody's gonna go knockin' down'a Williamsboig Bank Buildin', right? Or tearin' up t' Navy Yawrd? Ebbets Feel, t'at' awrways gonna be t'eah. Nah, Ol' Lady Leonoreh ain' gonna have no trouble fin'in'eh way aroun' town." "Ol' lady, huh?" huffs Sally, with a sad shrug. "I don't mean none'a t'at," returns Joe. "Tellya what. B'foeh I go t'woik, we'll go downtown an' I'll buy ya lunch. Someplace nice. Anyt'ing y'wawnt. Someplace nice. Childs is nice, ain'it? Huh?" "T'oity yeehs," muses Sally.)

Homes will have to be broken up and wives will have to give up luxuries, but nobody will die of starvation. So promised New York City Selective Service Director Col. Arthur McDermott today, in interpreting the effects of the new draft rules that are expected to put nearly all able-bodied men of draft age in uniform by the end of next year. "Sacrifices will have to be made," declared Col. McDermott. "A wife may have to give up her apartment and go to work, but that is not considered extreme hardship. She won't die of poverty or starvation." Local draft boards will be given broad discretion to decide what constitutes "extreme hardship" that would exempt a man from service, and, McDermott noted, the cost of living will be an important element in determining whether wives left behind will be left to their own devices plus government allotments provided for dependents of drafted men.

Meanwhile, it is predicted that defense plants will soon be stripped of all young bachelors, with men formerly classed 3-B due to be drafted within six months, or earlier depending on replacement schedules. All such men have been reclassified 3-A, meaning that if their jobs can be filled by trained women or old men, they will be taken into the armed forces. Unmarried skilled workers will go first, to be followed by married men without children, and finally married men with children born after September 15, 1942, meaning children born of so-called "Pearl Harbor marriages" will not count toward a deferrment.

The trial of two men charged with first degree murder in the death of a policeman in 1939 continues today in Kings County Court, before Judge Louis Goldstein and a blue ribbon jury. In testimony yesterday, Detective Cesare Bonnano of the Borough Park precinct stated that defendant Charles Farley told him during interrogation that he was responsible for the shooting of Patrolman Nicholas Moreno during the botched robbery of a Leonard Street gas station. Bonnano thus became the third witness presented by Assistant District Attorney Burton Turkus to place the blame for the shooting on Farley, with Bonnano stressing that Farley admitted that he himself fired the gun, with co-defendant Louis Caridad only driving the car. Bonnano further testified that Caridad implicated Farley as the gunman during his own interrogation, and then urged his co-defendant to come clean, admitting that he had "told all" during his questioning. Bonnano stated that Farley's response to that was "if Louis said so, then it's the truth."

A million grains of quinine donated by Brooklyn druggists is on its way to American fighting forces in the Pacific, to combat the deadly malaria germ. An expressman reported this morning to the office of Abraham Sarenson, 16 Court Street, to pick up the coffin-shaped parcel, 7 feet long and 30 inches wide, containing the vital drug. The crate bore a prominent inscription: "To TOJO'S MALARIAL GERMS." The donation, valued at $5000, brings to the halfway point the 2,000,000-grain drive begun in February by the Consolodated Retail Pharmacists of Brooklyn, Incorporated. Since Pearl Harbor, all stocks of quinine in the United States have been frozen by the government, prohibiting retail sale of the drug while frantic research goes on in the hope of finding some synthetic substitute.

(IT BETTER NOT RAIN)

( I look forward every spring to Mr. Pollock's circus essays, and I get the feeling that he does too.)

Newspaper and radio commentator Dorothy Thompson will marry refugee Czecholsovakian artist Maxim Kopf at her country estate at Barnard, Vermont in June. Miss Thompson was formerly married to author Sinclair Lewis, and her wedding to Mr. Kopf will be her third marriage. Prior to Lewis, she had been married to an Austrian author, Joseph Bard, whom she divorced after four years.

"Just A Sorry Neighbor" writes in to Helen Worth to agree with a reader who wrote in recently to complain about children digging up her yard with spoons. "The majority of mothers of this day and age," JASN huffs, "are responsible for the gangster children who destroy steps and stoops, and windows, and dig up flower pots, throwing the dirt all over the porch. If you speak to the mothers regarding the conduct of their children, they are highly insulted and reply that the children are merely babies. That is all the more reason why children should have proper supervision while playing with hammers, sticks, stones and silver spoons!" Helen dismisses her statements, noting that the little girls in question were just five year old, doing what five-year-olds do, and besides, the spoons weren't even silver.

(Not much of a psychiatrist if he doesn't even have a couch!)

Safe-crackers came within a few inches of ration books worth thousands of gallons of gasoline, cases of canned goods, and many pounds of rationed meat when they were frightened out of an office at the Coney Island Ration Board last night. County Rationing Administrator George C. Tilyou noted that they had succeeded in prying off the outer door of a safe containing a day's supply of blank ration books in a ration office located at PS 100, 100 West 1st Street. The thieves were evidently startled in the course of their robbery and fled before they could penetrate the safe's inner door. A janitor discovered the robbery attempt early this morning when he arrived to tend the furnace.

(I want one of those cards. Where do I sign up?)

Although Dixie Walker has left his job as athletic director at the Sperry Gyroscope Company to return to the Dodgers, he laid the foundation for a vast company-wide athletic program that is bearing fruit among the defense contractor's 30,000 employees with the advent of spring. Dixie's efforts established a program in which Sperry workers may play on a wide assortment of company teams, and a number of prominent athletes now working for the company are expected to perform on those squads. Several former major and minor leaguers will suit up for the Sperry baseball squad this year, including former Giant infield prospect Ralph Betzenberg. Track star Howie Borck will coach the Sperry track team, and former Golden Gloves semifinalst John Vetcher will box for Sperry. The company will also offer swimming, tennis, golf, and soccer teams, with experienced professional and semi-professional competitors in each sport expected to take part.

Molly Goldberg is heading to Princeton University -- or at least her scripts are. Mrs. Gertrude Berg, creator and star of the long-running serial of Jewish life will present a selection of her scripts from over the past fourteen years to the new Princeton Archives of Radio.

(Mr. Tracy, meet Miss Hepburn.)

(Look, Scarlett, you're never going to make it as a grim avenger of justice if you keep going "Ew!")

(Chekov's gun goes "click.")

(I'm sure they ARE going to "fix it up with our customers." FETCH THE PATROL WAGON.)

(Have you checked at Davega?)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"Passport for Pelf!" Sounds like a great concept for a radio giveaway show.

Well said.

"Aw, it's not so hard, Uncle Malcolm. After the first dozen or so, you don't even think about it anymore."

All right, Tracy can make a city charge go away? Try it with the Federal rap.

To say nothing of the prison tattoos.

Skeezix learned a valuable lesson from those guys messing around out in the alley.

NIce to see Tula's still around.

"T-A-F-F-Y T-A-F-F-Y" "What's that, some new code?"

And another THUD! Or a CRRRACK if he does it right. Sort of like breaking into a ripe melon.

Hey, banjoeyes -- words hurt! THUD!

 

[LizzieMaine]

On, and...

Formerly the home of that metaphysical cult that had the Immortal Baby. Didn't work out so well, did it?

 

[Fading Fast]

...

Meanwhile, it is predicted that defense plants will soon be stripped of all young bachelors, with men formerly classed 3-B due to be drafted within six months, or earlier depending on replacement schedules. All such men have been reclassified 3-A, meaning that if their jobs can be filled by trained women or old men, they will be taken into the armed forces. Unmarried skilled workers will go first, to be followed by married men without children, and finally married men with children born after September 15, 1942, meaning children born of so-called "Pearl Harbor marriages" will not count toward a deferrment.
...

That's a few dominos before they get to our Joe.

...

The trial of two men charged with first degree murder in the death of a policeman in 1939 continues today in Kings County Court, before Judge Louis Goldstein and a blue ribbon jury. In testimony yesterday, Detective Cesare Bonnano of the Borough Park precinct stated that defendant Charles Farley told him during interrogation that he was responsible for the shooting of Patrolman Nicholas Moreno during the botched robbery of a Leonard Street gas station. Bonnano thus became the third witness presented by Assistant District Attorney Burton Turkus to place the blame for the shooting on Farley, with Bonnano stressing that Farley admitted that he himself fired the gun, with co-defendant Louis Caridad only driving the car. Bonnano further testified that Caridad implicated Farley as the gunman during his own interrogation, and then urged his co-defendant to come clean, admitting that he had "told all" during his questioning. Bonnano stated that Farley's response to that was "if Louis said so, then it's the truth."
...

Does Farley actually have a lawyer as this is pretty weak evidence right now? My guess is Farley's guilty as hell, but the State needs more than what we've seen so far as any half-baked lawyer should be able to tear this testimony to shreds.

...

(IT BETTER NOT RAIN)
...

It's a neat idea for a doubleheader.

...

Safe-crackers came within a few inches of ration books worth thousands of gallons of gasoline, cases of canned goods, and many pounds of rationed meat when they were frightened out of an office at the Coney Island Ration Board last night. County Rationing Administrator George C. Tilyou noted that they had succeeded in prying off the outer door of a safe containing a day's supply of blank ration books in a ration office located at PS 100, 100 West 1st Street. The thieves were evidently startled in the course of their robbery and fled before they could penetrate the safe's inner door. A janitor discovered the robbery attempt early this morning when he arrived to tend the furnace.
...

It's sad, as being a safe-cracker was once a good career with plenty of employment opportunities that's all but gone away.

(I want one of those cards. Where do I sign up?)
...

Have you looked on eBay?

...

(Chekov's gun goes "click.")
...

"Shall we move along, Lady McBeth!" Nice.

And in the Daily News...

"Passport for Pelf!" Sounds like a great concept for a radio giveaway show.
...

It's such a good Page Four story. She's got the money that will hire the lawyers that will smooth it out legally in time, but right now, the Chicago judge is angry.

...

"Aw, it's not so hard, Uncle Malcolm. After the first dozen or so, you don't even think about it anymore."
....

It's the Stalin quote on the death of a million once again.

...

To say nothing of the prison tattoos.
...

There's also another more, umm, intimate way that Millie could tell the difference.

On, and...

Formerly the home of that metaphysical cult that had the Immortal Baby. Didn't work out so well, did it?

With the post-war housing boom, it probably turned into a good investment.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Camilli an' Medwick hitt'n again," observes Joe. "Now t'at's moeh like it." "Glossop," scoffs Sally. "A bum t'at coud'n even stick wit' t' Phillies. I ask ya." "Y dressed up again," notes Joe. "You goin' downtown again?" "Yeh," nods Sally. "T'ey wan'ed t'tawk t'me 'bout a job. Wit' t' phone comp'ny. T'ey got a fac'try wheah t'ey make radio tubes an' awlat, an' it looks like sump'n I c'd do. On'y probl'm it's oveh in Joisey. I dunno how it'd go takin' Leonoreh out'na train ev'ry day an' back again t'stay inna noissery t'eah. An' what if it's a swing shift, what if I'm out awl night, an' you gett'n home at 1 inna mawrnin'? Howzat gonna woik?" "You tawk t'ya ma?" asks Joe. "She's still all woiked up about Mickey goin' oveh," shrugs Sally. "She sez t'me, 'I'm gonna sign up'f'ra job at Todd's Shipyawrd," she says. "Aw," dismisses Joe, "she said t'at befoeh." "Yeah," Sally replies, "but t'is ain'nat. She was serious t'is time. Y'c'd see it." "What about t'stoeh?" queries Joe. "Eh," Sally shrugs, "she says she c'd get one'a t' Leary boys to look afteh it." "Ain'ney goin' inna Awrmy?" questions Joe. "Big strappin' boys like t'at?" "T'ey got flat feet," explains Sally. "Bot' of'm?" "It's whatchacawl hereditary. Uncle Frank's got'm too. "I t'ought t'at come fr'm ward heelin'." "What?" "Nut'n.")

Subscriptions to the Second War Loan Drive for the entire New York District passed the $2,000,000,000 mark today, with the push on now to meet the $3,000,000,000 quota for the entire Second Treasury District. As of midday today, bond sales in the New York distrit since the drive began earlier this week stood at $2,015,000,000, including all orders to date from savings banks, insurance companies, and all other investors save for commercial banks. The nationwide quota for all noncommercial investors has been set at $13,000,000,000. Brooklyn's own quota of $95,000,000 was exceeded within the first 24 hours of the drive. As part of the continuing Brooklyn campaign, Dodger manager Leo Durocher yesterday led a delegation of Dodger players on a tour of local manufacturing plants, including the C. J. Tagliabue Company at 540 Park Avenue, the L. N. Stern Company at 56 Pearl Street, and the American Sugar Refining Company at 51 2nd Street. The Dodgers have resolved to directly sell at least $50,000,000 worth of bonds to the people of Brooklyn during the campaign.

The detective believed responsible for wringing alleged confessions out of the two men accused of shooting a police patrolman to death during a botched gas station robbery in 1939 will be cross examined today by attorneys for the defense. Detective Howard Schreck, on the stand yesterday in Kings County Court for the prosecution, corroborated testimony from three other police officers that defendants Charles Farley and Louis Caridad had verbally admitted their guilt in the slaying of Patrolman Nicholas Moreno. Detective Schreck took the stand following testimony from Detective Cesare Bonnano of the Borough Park precinct, who acknowledged under cross-examination that Caridad had told him "several versions" of his alleged participation in the shooting, and admitted that when he pointed out to Caridad that several of his statements did not fit the physical facts of the case, Caridad then revised his statements to fit those facts. Detective Bonnano also admitted that of 155 persons he questioned during his investigation of the murder, not one stated that they had seen Farley and Caridad together around the time of the crime in May 1939, nor at any other time before that.

("What? I'm under arrest? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT I PAID FOR THAT JACKET??")

Two convicts were presumed to have been shot to death during a bold attempt yesterday to escape from Alcatraz Prison near San Francisco. Thirty-six year old Floyd G. Hamilton, former member of a midwest gang, and 24-year-old James A. Boarman, bank robber from Indianapolis, Indiana, were shot by guards as they attempted to swim for freedom in the treacherous waters surrounding the island prison. Hamilton, a brother of Raymond Hamilton of the Bonnie Parker-Clyde Barrow gang, was said to have been wounded and "almost certainly drowned," while Boarman was said by Warden James A. Johnston to be "certainly dead." Two other convicts participating in the escape were recaptured alive, 43-year-old Fred Hunter of Cleveland, an associate of the notorious Alvin "Creepy" Karpis, and Harold M. Brest, Pennsylvania kidnaper bank robber. Brest was found huddling in a cave on the side of the rocky island, nursing cuts and bruises suffered while climbing down toward the water. The four men overpowered guards in a prison workshop, and leaped out a window clad only in their underwear. They had smeared their bodies with heavy grease in an attempt to protect themselves from the chill of the icy water.

Two blind men have taken jobs as riveters at an aircraft plant in Long Island City. 25-year old George Cataldo of 96 Franklin Avenue and 30-year-old Harry Cohen of 1090 Washington Avenue had been employed for years at the workshop of the Industrial Home for the Blind, 523 Gates Avenue, and recently graduated from the Aircraft Trade School on Pacific Street, where, despite the lack of any special facilities or coursework for the blind, they completed the program in 250 hours, despite the usual average of 300 hours for persons with sight. Their new employer, the General Aircraft Corporation, 43-02 Ditmas Boulevard, has adopted a policy of hiring physically handicapped persons wherever possible for general employment.

(The word "mugging" never appeared in the Eagle, as far as I saw, and as far as I can remember, before last year, when, suddenly, it was everywhere. Such robberies were merely called "stickups" or "holdups" or just robberies before the "mugging" craze began. It would be very interesting to know which New York paper first used the term and under what circumstances.)

If you see Uncle Sam chasing Adolf Hitler down Bedford Avenue today in an Army jeep, your eyes are not playing tricks on you -- it's a stunt to advertise "Madison Maneuvers," the annual faculty variety show presented by the teachers at James Madison High School tonight thru Saturday in the school auditorium, Bedford Avenue at Quentin Road. The show, featuring faculty members in songs and sketches, is being presented as a fund-raiser for the Second War Loan Drive, and for the purchase of a second mobile blood unit for the Brooklyn Red Cross.

(And remember, baldness is not an exemption.)

Reader William E. Davenport commends Judge Louis Goldstein and attorney Arthur Garfield Hays for their decisions to resign from the American Bar Association in protest of that group's refusal to admit a "Phi Beta Kappa colored man" to membership. "Where should race prejudice and class discrimination be halted," he challenges, "if not at the seat of judgement?"

(C'mon, Bill -- you had the chance to say "The Yankees? Are They Still In The League?" AND YOU DIDN'T DO IT? Go Browns!!)

A Flatbush man has made the rank of first sergeant after just two months in the Army. John A. Clark of 1818 E. 38th Street, a graduate of Erasmus Hall High School, had previously served in the Army Air Corps from 1933 to 1935, and reenlisted last year. He was promoted to private first class in less than a month, and made sergeant just a month after that. Ten days after getting three stripes, he earned two more and a diamond.

(Oh yeah, wise guy? There's no such thing as a 4-Z classification. LET'S SEE YOUR DRAFT CARD.)

(Meanwhile, in our continuing attempt to understand the physics of Scarlett's invisibility power and its effect on surrounding matter, I wish I didn't have to consider today's third panel.)

(Oh, and hey Dan -- consider keeping the beard. The angry hobo/lumberjack/truck driver thing works for you.)

(It's nice to have supportive parents.)

("You moran! You rafferty! You fitzgerald!")

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

It was common, well into my own childhood, for mothers to leave babies in carriages or strollers parked on the sidewalk outside stores when they went inside to do business, and it was only really the suburbanization of neighborhoods and the increasing dominance of car-based shopping centers that did away with this. Well, that and the occasional abduction.

Solid Jo myself, except I couldn't stand the Professor. HE'S OLD ENOUGH TO BE YOUR FATHER. WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? LIVE ALONE AND LIKE IT!

"But what good will that do?" Migawd, Mitt is WARBUCKS IN DISGUISE!

"And besides, there's only one 4-F in this family, AND IT ISN'T HIM.")

"That's mighty fine of you, Chief. Listen, I've got an uncle in the wholesale luggage business, so if you ever need..."

And just like that, the stock market crashed.

Hey, at least it shuts him up.

Sho' 'nuff?

One of the side effects of radium poisoning is massive sudden weight loss.

An underground lair with an archery range. That's something new!

 

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and...

This "gremlin" craze is getting out of hand.

 

[Fading Fast]

...

The detective believed responsible for wringing alleged confessions out of the two men accused of shooting a police patrolman to death during a botched gas station robbery in 1939 will be cross examined today by attorneys for the defense. Detective Howard Schreck, on the stand yesterday in Kings County Court for the prosecution, corroborated testimony from three other police officers that defendants Charles Farley and Louis Caridad had verbally admitted their guilt in the slaying of Patrolman Nicholas Moreno. Detective Schreck took the stand following testimony from Detective Cesare Bonnano of the Borough Park precinct, who acknowledged under cross-examination that Caridad had told him "several versions" of his alleged participation in the shooting, and admitted that when he pointed out to Caridad that several of his statements did not fit the physical facts of the case, Caridad then revised his statements to fit those facts. Detective Bonnano also admitted that of 155 persons he questioned during his investigation of the murder, not one stated that they had seen Farley and Caridad together around the time of the crime in May 1939, nor at any other time before that.
...

I wouldn't be the least bit surprised to find out these guys are guilty, but this is the second day in a row that we've seen how insanely weak the case against them has been so far. There must be more and better evidence coming up or this case should never have made it to trial.

...

("What? I'm under arrest? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT I PAID FOR THAT JACKET??")
...

"...wasn't the thug type." Perfect.

So many crimes are solved because the crooks get greedy and cheat one or more of the gang members.

They shouldn't have burned the bonds as there is a very good chance they were bearer bonds and could have been cashed.

Once again, we see why a safecracker was a good, respectable career back then. Had the gang had one, they wouldn't have needed to move the half-ton safe in the first place.

This would never have happened had Doc Riemenschneider been the head of the gang.

...

Reader William E. Davenport commends Judge Louis Goldstein and attorney Arthur Garfield Hays for their decisions to resign from the American Bar Association in protest of that group's refusal to admit a "Phi Beta Kappa colored man" to membership. "Where should race prejudice and class discrimination be halted," he challenges, "if not at the seat of judgement?"
...

To quote Lizzie, "Coming Events Cast Their Shadows Before...."

...

(Oh yeah, wise guy? There's no such thing as a 4-Z classification. LET'S SEE YOUR DRAFT CARD.)
...

A dark shirt and light tie is almost always a sign of a nefarious character.

...

(Oh, and hey Dan -- consider keeping the beard. The angry hobo/lumberjack/truck driver thing works for you.)
...

"I just spent two days in a swamp and now am off to arrest more Nazi spies, so screw you and your written report; you'll get it when you get it."

And in the Daily News...

It was common, well into my own childhood, for mothers to leave babies in carriages or strollers parked on the sidewalk outside stores when they went inside to do business, and it was only really the suburbanization of neighborhoods and the increasing dominance of car-based shopping centers that did away with this. Well, that and the occasional abduction.
...

What happened to Sowder's first wife? Just askin'.

...

Solid Jo myself, except I couldn't stand the Professor. HE'S OLD ENOUGH TO BE YOUR FATHER. WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? LIVE ALONE AND LIKE IT!
...

Arline F. Fischer might want to reread "Gone With the Wind" to get a few details straightened out.

...

"But what good will that do?" Migawd, Mitt is WARBUCKS IN DISGUISE!
...

It confirms what we discovered a bit back when Annie had to plan the first attack on the Nazis - Saltz is an idiot.

...

Hey, at least it shuts him up.
...

It's always smart to keep the idiot occupied with busy work. Hey, maybe Saltz can help him with the letter.

...

An underground lair with an archery range. That's something new!

"Basements 'r Us offers a full range of archery products in our sports department. Bows and arrows are two aisles over from ropes and gags, the latter are some of our top sellers.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Uhhhhh!" fusses Leonora, as she pulls at her right ear. "Hurts!" "It's infected again," explains Sally, as Joe looks on with concern. "Heeh, honey, hol' still an' let'cha mama flush it out." "No!" insists Leonora, "Stopit!" "It was freezin' inneah las' night," grumbles Joe. "I t'ought Uncle Frank had t'berleh all fixed." "It'sat rat lan'loehd again," growls Sally. "Remembeh? He shuts off t'heat on Apr'l fois', no matteh how cold it is.""I t'ought Uncle Frank had'AT awl fixed." "What?" "Nut'n. Hey, didt'ey say anyt'ing downa t'emplermen' office yestehday?" "I tawked wit'tis guy f'm Weste'n Electric, t'at'sa pawrta t'phone compny y'know. He says I gotta take a physical fois', I'd haveta go out t'Joisey t't plant an' see t'eah docteh. Out t' Koiney, y'know? Out by Newehk." "Cancha get a physical when y'take in Leonoreh t'get'eh eeah looked at?" "Nah," shrugs Sally. "Doctehs ain' like eatin' at Bickfed's, y'know. Y'don' get no two-f'-one deals.")

The War Labor Board is appealing to United Mine Workers President John L. Lewis to stop a UMW jurisdictional strike at the plastics division of the Celanese Corporation of America plant in Newark. The strike began on Monday and yesterday the WLB released a telegram sent to Lewis urging him as "a responsible leader of your union to urge the employees to return to work so that full and continuous production may be resumed in conformance with labor's pledge to the President that there shall be no strikes for the duration of the war." Meanwhile, bituminous coal operators from the Southern Appalachain area yesterday voted to refuse the WLB's proposal for a six-day work week as the basis for a negotiated settlement with the UMW over wage increases. Northern coal operators had earlier voted to reject that same offer, which has been accepted by the union.

(Open and shut and open and shut...)

Seven Japanese-American evacuees from the Colorado River War Relocation Center have been hired to work for Secretary of the Interior Harold Ickes at his estate in Olney, Maryland. War Relocation Authority officials confirmed that the evacuees are expected to arrive in the east tomorrow, but declined to elaborate on the wages they will be paid for their work.

Railroad passenger agents in the east are expressing concern over a possible black market dealing in Pullman reservations, where certain agencies advertise that they can obtain space for travelers on "sold out trains." Vanderbilt Arnold, chairman of the passenger department of the Trunk Lines Association, said he did not believe many reservations were being sold in this manner, but stressed that "all rail lines are anxious to break up this business before it gets started."

A Valley Stream woman says she knew, from her dreams, that her brother, reported missing in action by the Navy nearly a year ago, was still alive -- and those dreams were confirmed today when Mrs Catherine Kelly received an official telegram reporting that her brother, Carpenter's Mate Martin Joseph Gorham, is alive in a Japanese prison camp. "Oh," declared Mrs. Kelly, "I am a great believer in dreams."

The battle between Mayor LaGuardia and the president of the Lord & Taylor department store continues in all its polysyllalbic fury. Yesterday the Mayor got in his licks by accusing department stores engaged in an advertising boycott of certain newspapers of trying to "club the newspapers into supporting opposition" to his tax and budget programs and with trying to force an increase in the five-cent subway fare. Walter Hoving of Lord & Taylor, who is also chairman of the Committee to Reduce The Budget By Sensible Economics responded by calling the Mayor "a liar who should be treated at Bellevue for departmentstoreitis." Mr. Hoving further accused the Mayor of "the height of demagoguery and the depth of public immorality for any man, particularly the Mayor of a great city, to disparage, to degrade, and to vilify the high purpose of the newspapers and the press by saying that they are controlled, or can be controlled, or might be controlled by department stores or by anybody else."

Civilian Defense Volunteers and workers in Block Service Organizations will not be permitted to discuss religion or politics during organizational meetings. An order issued by city-wide BSO chief Howard D. Jones prohibits all religious, political, racial, or commercial conversations at all organizational meetings, with volunteers required to confine their conversation to matters within the scope of official CDVO and BSO activities.

(Keep 'em flying -- er, running!)

Cold cuts are enjoying new popularity this week, following the reduction in point value of pork sausage, bologna, liverwurst, baked luncheon loaves, and such. All such products have been reduced from seven points per pound to six, when manufactured without non-meat fillers. Cold cuts made with cereal or soy fillers have been reduced to five points, while head cheese, souse, and similar products made from offal meats drop from four points per pound to three, and scrapple from three points to two. Pork neck and backbones can now be had for one point a pound. With the point reductions, cold cuts should no longer be treated as a snack, but should pull serious wartime duty as the main dish.

(Rabbits? NO! It's those rotten neighborhood kids!)

Police Commissioner Lewis J. Valentine today ordered ranking officers of the Police Department to step up efforts to end the current wave of abductions of babies. "I know of no crime," the Commissioner thundered, with the exception of treason, that is worse than kidnapping. I want results. I want this kidnapping stopped!")

(BOBO NEWSOM! BOBO NEWSOM! BOBO NEWSOM! ED HEAD! ED HEAD! ED HEAD!)

These are difficult times for Hollywood song-and-dance stars, but Fred Astaire says he's finally found an acceptable substitute for dance-flooring materials that have gone to war. You can't get the fine birch and eastern maple that give floors used in tap routines their distinct, resonant sound characteristics, but Astaire says that, after extensive testing and experimentation of many different types of flooring and floor finishes, he's determined that pressed-wood board finished with "about 10 coats of lacquer" gives a sound response comparable to the previous standard.

("Krafft's?" Figures he'd take you to a cheesy joint like that.)

(All right then. Should we be writing this down?)

(Oh, and since Irwin is the plant, you'll have to get him out of the basement.)

(THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS, AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE HERO KID! AND HE DIDN"T EVEN HAVE TO KILL ANYBODY!)

(When George finally wakes up from this dream, he'll never go to sleep again.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

How, in the name of Newtonian physics, do you fall on top of an exploding grenade and not get killed? Did just the detonator go off and the rest of it was a dud?

Ah. Well. All right then. Carry on.

"Welp, back to work. Can I have a dollar to go buy a new watch?"

Boy, that snow melted fast.

War is HELL.

Look, don't they fingerprint anybody in this jail?

***BOOM!***

BIG STOOP?? CONNIE? Is that YOU??? WHERE'S PATRICK?

And that's how patent medicine fortunes are made.

Hey, watch that "little man" stuff. Words hurt.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and...

Honestagawd, is there nothing this man can't do?