The Era -- Day By Day

[Fading Fast]

...

A 45-year-old equipment salesman began a 30-day jail sentence today after being found guilty of "making disparaging remarks about the American and British war effort." Moses Elisberg was found guilty of disorderly conduct after he was overheard saying to a group of people which included a plainclothes policeman, "who is this President Roosevelt? He's only a man elected by the people. He's not a god. We're losing the war! Who are these generals? They are only there because they knew the right somebodies!" Said Magistrate Robert Levis in pronouncing sentence, "I'm going to stamp out lying statements which are dangerous to the war effort."
...

If those represent the extent of Ellsberg's statements, Magistrate Levis might want to take another look at the Constitution.

...

(My grandmother did this to the end of her life.)
...

One assumes Field Marshall Annie is enforcing these procedures with her troops.

...


("Hah," hahs Sally. "An' if ya don't like t'way t'pain' job come out, y'c'n go to t' Patio -- an' rinse it all off inna pool!" "Watch out f'tem gol'fish, t'ough," warns Joe. "T'ey bite!")
...

Too much buildup in that story anyway.

Fitz: "Honey, did you know that the actor Sydney Greenstreet weights 300-plus pounds."
Mrs. Fitz: "Why no dear, that's interesting."
Fitz: "Boy, he's a big man."
Mrs. Fitz: "Yes he is dear."
Fitz: "Hmm."
Mrs. Fitz: [to herself] "Sigh."

...

A 30-year-old Stuyvesant Heights woman received a suspended sentence on a charge that she had insulted a patrolman who had told her and a group of friends to "move along" as they congregated on the corner of Reid and Gates Avenues. Patrolman John D. Foy brought Mrs. Richards Bey before Magistrate Charles Solomon on a disorderly conduct charge, but Magistrate Solomon suspended sentence after Mrs. Bey explained she had merely bowed to the patrolman and salaamed him in the Moslem fashion, saying, in a combination of "Moorish and Yiddish," "Peace be with you."
...

New York City has always been a beautiful mosaic of multiculturalism.

...

(Well, now, I wasn't expecting the Bungles to be replaced by a strip about talking dogs. How Jo would rage!)

But George would not be the least surprised or incredulous.

And in the Daily News...

There's a lot about probate law that I don't understand, but more power to Miss Beaton.
...

Probate law is an enigma even within the legal profession. Probate court feels very much like a game of judge's discretion.

...

Hundreds of miles away, Minerva Gump settles back against her pillow, closes her book, snaps off the light, and sighs her way to a restful, pleasant sleep.
...

And then she snapped awake, for no apparent reason, at the exact moment Andy bellowed out "Oh Min!" revealing some sort of otherworldly sinew that somehow binds these two together.

 

[ChiTownScion]

View attachment 442274
Dad looks over and says "yeah, but we still gotta FEED him."


Heck, I feed/ house one who's turning 32 next month.

But I love having him around and it's no burden to us. I have someone to run out with for impromptu meals that my wife will never consume.

He's working full time, saving his money, improving his vocational skills. An apprenticeship as an electrician seems like it's going to happen: if he pulls it off, and becomes full-fledged, I figure he can not only afford to buy his own home but send his mom and I on an around the world cruise.

 

[LizzieMaine]

(It may sound callous to say this given everything else on this page, but this circus fire story is going to haunt me for a long time to come.)

Adolf Hitler has launched a "master plan" to break the resistance of Occupied Europe by deporting hundreds of thousands of enslaved peoples from their homelands, a survey of information reaching refugee governments by the United Press indicated today. It is believed the primary purpose of the deportations is to undermine and weaken help available to an Allied second front. The reports indicate that at least 3,000,000 persons have already been moved from their homelands to Germany, to serve as slave labor for Axis war factories, with thousands more being carried off daily from Holland, Belgium, France, Poland, Yugoslavia, Czechoslovakia, Norway, Denmark, and Greece. One refugee spokesman was confident that Hitler plans to take all the men from the "troublesome areas," and possibly all Jews -- men, women, and children -- from the entirety of Western Europe. It is speculated that Holland, where underground resistance against Nazi occupation has been constant, may be particularly targeted, with Hitler's master plan said to include the deportation and enslavement of all 3,000,000 males in that country between the ages of 16 and 60.

Yugoslav patriot actions have forced Benito Mussolini to call a formal Italian war conference to map plans for the "ruthless subjugation" of that country. Axis radio made it clear that the Fascist leader had presided over a military conference at Gorizia, twenty miles from the turbulent Yugoslav border. Addressing a crowd from the balcony of the Gorizia governor's palace, Mussolini declared "there will be no second front here, and it is doubtful there will be a second front anywhere in the world. The Axis and the Tripartate Powers have the means to win victory." Mussolini further warned Yugoslav partisans that Italy will "apply the law" to those who "still dream morbid dreams." That "law," according to a Yugoslav spokesman, includes the wholesale burning of Yugoslav villages and the bombardment by Italian gunboats of villages all along the Adriatic coast.

President Roosevelt will spend today studying the verdict reached by a military commission in the cases of eight Nazi saboteurs, but it appears that there is only a slight chance that the verdict will be released today. White House press secretary Stephen Early indicated that the President has been examining the verdict since it was brought to his desk yesterday afternoon, but noted that his review of the case may be interrupted today by "the press of other affairs." Seven of the saboteurs are expected to die by hanging or by firing squad, while the fate of the eighth man, George John Dasch, who turned Government witness against his fellow defendants, may be a long Federal prison sentence.

Members of the new Women's Naval Reserve Corps will be barred from smoking on the streets or wearing "conspicuous makeup" while in uniform, according to regulations printed in the handbooks to be distributed to WAVES reporting on September 1st for officers' training at Smith College in Northampton, Massachusetts. Lieutenant Commander Mildred McAfee, director of the WAVES, notes that officer candidates will also be drilled in naval procedures and history, but emphasized that the camp will not be treated as a "penal institution." School-bound WAVES will be issued an allowance of $200 for the purchase of uniforms. Once inducted as midshipwomen, the officer candidates will be permitted leave from Saturday noon till Sunday evening. They may date as they please, but marriages are prohibited until the training period, not to exceed four months, is completed.

The new $20,000,000 Fort Greene Housing Project will welcome its first 120 families on August 17th, barring any difficulties with war priorities governing the installation of electric refrigerators and metal fixtures. The huge project, the largest in the state, occupies 23 full city blocks, and tenancy will be confined exclusively to Brooklyn Navy Yard workers and their families. It is expected that 612 additional families will take up residence in the project by mid-September. When fully completed, the project will house 3500 families in 35 residential structures and three store buildings. A community center building was part of the original plan, but its construction has been postponed for the duration. In lieu of that building, a temporary nursery and baby-health center will be set up for the children of mothers who have joined their husbands in war production work.

("I mean, where does he think he is, the Union League Club?")

(I'll have you know, Mr. Pollock, that some of the best actors I've ever known have been taxi drivers. How else are they gonna make a living?)

("That's the last time I buy insurance from my own brother!")

(Get a lawyer, hon. This guy is as guilty as his "intellectual principles" are shallow.)

A soldier from Fort Hamilton died early this morning at Coney Island Hospital after both of his legs were cut off by a BMT elevated train at the Stillwell and Surf Avenue station. Twenty-nine year old Corporal Robert McDowell was lying across the tracks as the train approached. Motorman Patrick Barrett thought he was "a bundle," but was unable to stop the train until after the front truck had already passed over the soldier. His body was carried two hundred feet down the tracks before the train finally came to a halt.

Major John Harlan Amen made his official departure from his Borough Hall offices yesterday, bringing a final end to his four-year investigation, as Assistant Attorney General, of official corruption in Brooklyn. Major Amen was presented with a precision wrist watch as a parting gift from his staff of forty gang-busters and corruption-neutralizers, who are expected to remain on the job, wrapping up the final affairs of the Amen Office, until November.

("I didn't stall!" = "Of course I stalled! Ya think I'm stupid? Now be quiet, they're playin' the National Anthem!")

(Pretty ripe talk from a man in a polka-dot ascot and saddle shoes.)

("That's all very well, my dear, but *I* have this remarkable power of extending my neck like a rubber turtle!")

(GOTCHA NOW, FELLA -- *THOSE AREN'T PUMPS!*)

(Well now! It's nice to see that George has already found work in a new strip!)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"Thousands of dollars in Willkie bets." Chump.

All those "Petrillo" jokes in comedy shorts and cartoons? This is why.

If I had to guess which of our cartoonists would make a very specific effort to emphasize the principle of unity-thru-diversity, I probably wouldn't have picked Mr. Gray. But as we've seen, he's a far more complex fellow than his reputation suggests.

"What kind of commodity that comes in bags would people be interested in hoarding at just this moment in time? Hmmmmm? Soybeans? Cornmeal? I know, popcorn! They've got a THEATRE down there!"

Actually, this is *exactly* what show business is like.

"And you know, when this horse turns around, he looks just like Wilmer!"

Well gawdforbid you should play in the street!

C'mon now. Taffy deserves better than this punk.

"No! No! A Thousand Times No!" -- hit novelty song during the "Gay Nineties" craze of 1934. Given that it's about an innocent girl giving up her virtue to a bounder, I'd love to hear Willie sing it.

With friends like this....

 

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and...

"By the time the song ended, several bonfires were in progress among the standees in center field." It Was A Gentler Time.

 

[Fading Fast]

(It may sound callous to say this given everything else on this page, but this circus fire story is going to haunt me for a long time to come.)
...

That's understandable because that is an awful story in a different way than war stories, which sadly, we are getting somewhat inured to. Also, and this is what got to me, it was written in a very visceral way about the suffering of the animals. War stories - for better or worse - aren't usually written that way in 1942.

...

("I mean, where does he think he is, the Union League Club?")
...

As noted yesterday, there needed to be (or should have needed to be) something more than "unpopular ideas" to justify the sentence. I still get the feeling that "unpopular ideas" contributed to the sentence, in part because the judge clearly felt he needed to say it wasn't that, but "disorderly conduct." It feels "defensive."

I went to a business lunch at the Union League Club about ten years ago. As with all these clubs - I've been at events in those that lean conservative and those that lean liberal - you feel like you are walking into another time, a time much closer to 1942 than 2022.

...

(Get a lawyer, hon. This guy is as guilty as his "intellectual principles" are shallow.)
...

Dear Lord, just another fancy lie to cover up good old-fashioned cheatin'.

...

A soldier from Fort Hamilton died early this morning at Coney Island Hospital after both of his legs were cut off by a BMT elevated train at the Stillwell and Surf Avenue station. Twenty-nine year old Corporal Robert McDowell was lying across the tracks as the train approached. Motorman Patrick Barrett thought he was "a bundle," but was unable to stop the train until after the front truck had already passed over the soldier. His body was carried two hundred feet down the tracks before the train finally came to a halt.
...

Jesus. This is written in the same heartbreaking manner as the circus-tragedy story.

...

("I didn't stall!" = "Of course I stalled! Ya think I'm stupid? Now be quiet, they're playin' the National Anthem!")
...

A grand slam - this game lived up to its billing.

...

If I had to guess which of our cartoonists would make a very specific effort to emphasize the principle of unity-thru-diversity, I probably wouldn't have picked Mr. Gray. But as we've seen, he's a far more complex fellow than his reputation suggests.
...

It also reminds us of something we see all the time in these papers, few ideas today - good or bad - appear de novo to the present generation. Almost all of them have been out there for generations and, often, go much, much farther back than that.

...


Actually, this is *exactly* what show business is like.
...

Edson can keep doing this, but he's only increasing expectations. That said, this one is a pretty funny illustration.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Gus is having way, way too much fun with this whole storyline. Note that Clarissa the Penguin is right there in line helping to push. SEEZA MABOIKS!

 

[ChiTownScion]

Oh, and...

View attachment 442427
"By the time the song ended, several bonfires were in progress among the standees in center field." It Was A Gentler Time.

Remember the Heidi Game of 1968?

 

[Fading Fast]

Remember the Heidi Game of 1968?

My father was still grumbling about that game when he went to his grave in the early 1990s.

 

[LizzieMaine]

They talk about Dodger fans being rough, but Giant fans could be pretty violent. The last game at the Polo Grounds in 1957 found a mob pillaging the ballpark, tearing up monuments, and seething around the clubhouse demanding Horace Stoneham -- "with a rope around his neck." But at least then there were no bonfires.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Ehhhhhh!" ehhhhhhs Joe. "T't'ings'at go on in Flatbush!" "Ehhhhhh," ehhhhhs Sally right back. "Neit'eh'wunnat'em guys is from Flatbush. Ya got 'at one guy f'm Livin'ston Street, at's way'ta'hell upinna Heights -- an'nen ya got some hillbilly f'm Staten Islan'! Ya can't blame Flatbush f't'at stuff!" "Rogehs Aveneh an' Midwood Street!" exclaims Joe. "Atsa corneh right neah weah ya Ma lives!" "She wan'neven home," growls Sally. "She din' have nut'n t'do wit'tit! Ain' even been a gun inna house since my brut'teh..." "Bum!" interrupts Leonora, as Joe suddenly chokes on his brisket.)

Yugoslav patriot troops under the command of Gen. Draja Mikhailovich killed 1400 Axis troops, wounded 600, and captured 1000 prisoners in a major battle in the Bosnian sector of west-central Yugoslavia. It is reported that Bulgarian troops under guerilla fire were "forced to retire from the sector," but heavy fighting continues between Yugoslav patriots and other Axis units.

By order of the War Production Board, only the Woodstock Typewriter Company will be permitted to manufacture typewriters in the United States, and the Government itself will be its only customer. The order issued yesterday requires all other manufacturing of typewriters to halt at the end of October, with all other typewriter firms required to convert 100 percent to war production. Woodstock will be permitted to manufacture no more than 1600 office model typewriters a month up to a total of 22,701 machines over the period ending June 30, 1944. The manufacture of all portable typewriters was prohibited by the WPB in an order which took effect on July 31st.

More than 35 tons of war relics, including historic guns, mortars, and other antique military equipment on display at the Brooklyn Navy Yard, will be melted down to furnish metal for the production of new armaments under an order issued today by the Board of Navy Yard Officers. The relics, dating to the War of 1812, the Civil War, and the Spanish-American War, will be scrapped along with 150 tons of unused but obsolete armor plating now in storage at the yard. A few relics deemed too historically valuable to destroy will be preserved, including two guns captured from the British warship Macedonia in 1812 and the experimental submarine "Mechanical Whale," built in 1864. A 12,000-ton iron ram captured from the Confederate warship Mississippi, however, will be consigned to the furnace.

The scrapping of the relics followed a general call by the Army Ordnance Department for civic groups to turn in all guns, caissons, and similar military relics now decorating public buildings and parks. The general public has also been asked to turn in such items as are now in private hands, unless they have some specific historical value. The A. G. Spalding & Sons Company, sporting goods manufacturers, today turned in a collection of 275 pewter cups and other athletic trophies turned in during a drive at its retail stores, which, when melted down, will yield nearly 300 pounds of tin for military use.

President Roosevelt expects to complete within the next two or three days his review of the verdict in the case of eight Nazi saboteurs convicted by a military tribunal last week. White House press secretary Stephen Early indicated that the President yesterday consulted various legal advisers on aspects of the case. Seven of the eight convicted spies are expected to be sentenced to die once the President has completed his review of the case.

(I couldn't go. I just couldn't go.)

"Anybody would have done the same thing," commented ten-year-old Carol Hoff, deflecting praise after she plunged into the swirling waters of the Lido Canal near Long Beach, Long Island yesterday to save the life of a four-year-old boy. The boy, Dick Reed of Long Beach, was reaching for his toy boat when he fell into the canal, just as Carol was walking by in her bathing suit. Without a thought, the girl executed a perfect running dive into the water, reached the floundering boy with a few quick strokes, grabbed him by the hair, and pulled him to the shore. Carol, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. George Hoff of 36 Dalton Street, Long Beach, carried the boy to his home, just as the child's father, letter carrier Samuel J. Reed, was arriving home from work. Mr. Reed applied artificial respiration to his son, with the assistance of Long Beach lifeguards who had witnessed the rescue, and the boy was revived. Mr. Reed will ask the Nassau chapter of the Veterans of Foreign Wars to strike a medal for heroism to be presented to Carol.

("Arf," says Sandy.)

A candid-camera fiend was hauled into Brooklyn-Queens Night Court on a disorderly conduct charge after taking a photo of a policeman. Thirty-eight year old Harry Felsinger of Flatbush was arrested by Patrolman Herman Menkel of the Empire Boulevard station after Felsinger snapped a photograph of the patrolman performing his duties. Felsinger pleaded not guilty to the charge, but changed his plea to guilty after Patrolman Menkel testified that he was guarding a payroll when the photo was taken. Felsinger then admitted that he "was doing a favor for a friend" by "trying to get something on" Menkel, who had earlier given that friend a summons for dangerous driving. Felsinger was fined $5, and his film was confiscated and destroyed.

The new Brooklyn telephone directory, released today, contains an extensive section at the front of the book warning subscribers of new wartime restrictions on civilian telephone service. Among those warnings is a statement emphasizing that all use of the telephone by the general public is prohibited during any air raid warning, from the moment of the first siren to the final all-clear. That ban ensures that the lines will be kept clear for official use only. Over 290,000 copies of the new directory will be hand-delivered by New York Telephone carriers to subscribers between today and August 13th, along with over 280,000 copies of the Brooklyn Classified Directory.

(Nothing goes with the stifling heat of a Brooklyn summer like "White Christmas.")

(I wonder how Skeezix would have turned out if he'd been left on the doorstep of a candy store at DeKalb and Myrtle Avenues?)

(War Is Heck.)

The Women's Army Auxiliary Corps is putting out a call for piccolo players for the WAAC Band. The only woman piccoloist to enlist so far washed out yesterday after failing her physical examination.

(In a dark Brooklyn hotel room, a sudden flaring light awakens young Harold Patrick Reiser. "Whazzat?" he murmurs, wiping sleep from his eyes, the room swimming dizzily around him until he focuses in on the source of that light -- a bald, pudgy figure in a baggy baseball uniform. "Wake up, kid," growls the ghost in a gritty cigarette tenor. "You'n me gonna talk." "What's all this?" demands young Pete. "If it's about that chili I got from room service..." "Nah," replies the phantom. "Although," he sighs, patting his swollen midriff, "y'otta lay off that stuff. Nah, this is more important. I'm here to warn ya. I'm here to tell ya you need to tell Leo ya can't play. Ya need to be in the hospital." "What?" snaps Pete, now fully awake. "I'm th' best hitter in the league! Leo needs me! The team needs me! BROOKLYN needs me! If I don't play, Hilda an' all them crazies, they're gonna have a fit! Say, who are you, anyway?" "I'm you, stupid," snaps the shade. "I'm what you're gonna end up if you keep runnin' into walls an' actin' stupid! A fat, bald, old coach, hangin' on for the pension money!" "Izzat so," retorts Pete. "I'm gonna be in the Hall of Fame! Ask Parrott! Ask Holmes! Ask any of 'em!" "Yeah," sighs the ghost in a tone of sepulchral regret. "If ya buy a ticket. I'm here t'warn ya, kid -- you gotta take it easy!" "I CAN'T take it easy!" The ghost's weary eyes flicker with an unimaginable sadness. "I know," he sighs, as he fades into the darkness. "I know y'can't. I knowwwww......." And young Harold Patrick Reiser leans back on his pillow, closes his eyes, and thinks about the upcoming schedule.)

Powerful young catcher Roy Campinella heads the attack as the Baltimore Elite Giants invade Dexter Park tonight for a Ladies Night clash with the Bushwicks, who have lately been cleaning up on Negro League opposition. Last week, Max Rosner's boys dispatched the Black Yankees in a Sunday doubleheader, but the Elites have proven tougher opposition in the past, walloping the locals 6-3 when last they met. Campinella, a stocky hard-hitting Philadelphian, has drawn major-league interest in recent weeks. He has worked out for manager Hans Lobert of the Phillies, and has also drawn the attention of the Pirates, where he is expected to attend a tryout under the personal supervision of team president William Benswanger later this month.

(Oh, puff out your chest a little more there, big boy, it's almost as pneumatic as hers.)

("Dear Helen Worth...")

("You can't fool me! I read 'Terry and the Pirates!'")

(Honestly, it's like the Bungles never left.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Annie would never wear a bathing suit like that, but otherwise the resemblance is uncanny.

Snapshot of a moment.

"Guns? Knives? No, ma'm," says Annie. "Never use 'em. Don't NEED 'em!"

They're either making a fake oil well or brewing some really dark Stout.

Yeah, Taff, you can do a LOT better.

You'll have plenty of opportunity, bud.

"OH BIM!"

"I tried t'get a steak," sighs Sally. "One'a t'em radiated steaks from Bohack's! But you shoulda seena line!" "At's ok," exhales Joe. "I love brisket."

"You think we can pull that half-fare stunt again?"

Oh, Mamie, you an' me both.

 

[Fading Fast]

("Ehhhhhh!" ehhhhhhs Joe. "T't'ings'at go on in Flatbush!" "Ehhhhhh," ehhhhhs Sally right back. "Neit'eh'wunnat'em guys is from Flatbush. Ya got 'at one guy f'm Livin'ston Street, at's way'ta'hell upinna Heights -- an'nen ya got some hillbilly f'm Staten Islan'! Ya can't blame Flatbush f't'at stuff!" "Rogehs Aveneh an' Midwood Street!" exclaims Joe. "Atsa corneh right neah weah ya Ma lives!" "She wan'neven home," growls Sally. "She din' have nut'n t'do wit'tit! Ain' even been a gun inna house since my brut'teh..." "Bum!" interrupts Leonora, as Joe suddenly chokes on his brisket.)
...

Hmm, so England no longer considers itself bound by the Munch Agreement. What's next? War in Europe?

...

More than 35 tons of war relics, including historic guns, mortars, and other antique military equipment on display at the Brooklyn Navy Yard, will be melted down to furnish metal for the production of new armaments under an order issued today by the Board of Navy Yard Officers. The relics, dating to the War of 1812, the Civil War, and the Spanish-American War, will be scrapped along with 150 tons of unused but obsolete armor plating now in storage at the yard. A few relics deemed too historically valuable to destroy will be preserved, including two guns captured from the British warship Macedonia in 1812 and the experimental submarine "Mechanical Whale," built in 1864. A 12,000-ton iron ram captured from the Confederate warship Mississippi, however, will be consigned to the furnace.
...

I get it, but this makes my inner Fedora Loungeness sad.

...

"Anybody would have done the same thing," commented ten-year-old Carol Hoff, deflecting praise after she plunged into the swirling waters of the Lido Canal near Long Beach, Long Island yesterday to save the life of a four-year-old boy. The boy, Dick Reed of Long Beach, was reaching for his toy boat when he fell into the canal, just as Carol was walking by in her bathing suit. Without a thought, the girl executed a perfect running dive into the water, reached the floundering boy with a few quick strokes, grabbed him by the hair, and pulled him to the shore. Carol, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. George Hoff of 36 Dalton Street, Long Beach, carried the boy to his home, just as the child's father, letter carrier Samuel J. Reed, was arriving home from work. Mr. Reed applied artificial respiration to his son, with the assistance of Long Beach lifeguards who had witnessed the rescue, and the boy was revived. Mr. Reed will ask the Nassau chapter of the Veterans of Foreign Wars to strike a medal for heroism to be presented to Carol.

("Arf," says Sandy.)
...

A much needed story. Cool girl.

...

(I wonder how Skeezix would have turned out if he'd been left on the doorstep of a candy store at DeKalb and Myrtle Avenues?)
...

So, how old do we think Nick Gatt is, just askin'?

..The only woman piccoloist to enlist so far washed out yesterday after failing her physical examination.
...

This will be the only time in history, even if mankind survives for eons to come, that this sentence will ever be written.

...

(In a dark Brooklyn hotel room, a sudden flaring light awakens young Harold Patrick Reiser. "Whazzat?" he murmurs, wiping sleep from his eyes, the room swimming dizzily around him until he focuses in on the source of that light -- a bald, pudgy figure in a baggy baseball uniform. "Wake up, kid," growls the ghost in a gritty cigarette tenor. "You'n me gonna talk." "What's all this?" demands young Pete. "If it's about that chili I got from room service..." "Nah," replies the phantom. "Although," he sighs, patting his swollen midriff, "y'otta lay off that stuff. Nah, this is more important. I'm here to warn ya. I'm here to tell ya you need to tell Leo ya can't play. Ya need to be in the hospital." "What?" snaps Pete, now fully awake. "I'm th' best hitter in the league! Leo needs me! The team needs me! BROOKLYN needs me! If I don't play, Hilda an' all them crazies, they're gonna have a fit! Say, who are you, anyway?" "I'm you, stupid," snaps the shade. "I'm what you're gonna end up if you keep runnin' into walls an' actin' stupid! A fat, bald, old coach, hangin' on for the pension money!" "Izzat so," retorts Pete. "I'm gonna be in the Hall of Fame! Ask Parrott! Ask Holmes! Ask any of 'em!" "Yeah," sighs the ghost in a tone of sepulchral regret. "If ya buy a ticket. I'm here t'warn ya, kid -- you gotta take it easy!" "I CAN'T take it easy!" The ghost's weary eyes flicker with an unimaginable sadness. "I know," he sighs, as he fades into the darkness. "I know y'can't. I knowwwww......." And young Harold Patrick Reiser leans back on his pillow, closes his eyes, and thinks about the upcoming schedule.)
...

Well done, Lizzie.

...

(Oh, puff out your chest a little more there, big boy, it's almost as pneumatic as hers.)
...

"I don't like women who meddle in things that...get their hands dirty!"

Really? Maybe you want to think that one through again.

...

(Honestly, it's like the Bungles never left.)

I'm liking this one so far. It does have a Bungles-esque quality to it. It's early, but right now, it's the best replacement strip we've seen over the years. Love the dog.

"I'm not impressed, I can do dialogue, too. The real talent is conveying emotion and thoughts with just expression and body English...and fur."

And in the Daily News...

Annie would never wear a bathing suit like that, but otherwise the resemblance is uncanny.
...

The death-row interview is one of the most-chilling things we've ever read on Page Four.

...

They're either making a fake oil well or brewing some really dark Stout.
...

Could they be drilling into an existing gasoline or oil pipeline, or storage facility?


And yet again:

 

[LizzieMaine]

(The legal definition of treason is aiding an enemy in time of declared war, and this is certainly that.)

The former chief of Mitchell Field is now in Moscow as a personal representative of President Roosevelt, and it is believed his presence there may soon signal the active participation of American fliers in the Russian theatre of war. Major General Follet Bradley, who had served as commanding officer at Mitchell Field since last March was relieved of that command last month to take the new Moscow assignment. He is one of the most experienced flying officers in the Army Air Corps, having taken his first flight in a Wright biplane in 1912.

The War Labor Board has sent to the White House a plan that would compel all employers to submit all proposed wage increases for Government review and control, it was learned today. Chairman William M. Davis said an executive order by the President would be necessary to enforce the plan, but public members of the WLB believe it is necessary to prevent voluntary wage increases from impeding the wage stabilization formula introduced with the Little Steel case. That plan restricts wage increases to fifteen percent retroactive to January 1, 1941.

(Jesus.)

A survey of the Brooklyn public concerning the recent case of a machinery salesman from the Bronx sentenced to thirty days in jail for disparaging the President and the war effort reveals only one man willing to speak up for the defendant. The majority of persons questions by an Eagle reporter on the sidewalk today refused to take a position on the case of Moses Elisberg one way or the other, with only Edward Wright of 317 E. 7th Street championing Elisberg's cause. "I don't think anyone should be put in jail for saying we are losing the war," declared Mr. Wright. "Everyone is entitled to his opinon." Mr. Wright hastened to add that he believes we are winning the war. Several persons questioned called the question, itself, subversive, and several others agreed with Mr. Wright that we are definitely winning the war, but did not endorse his support for Elisberg's right to speak his opinion.

("Oh, and if my husband tried to pull that with me, I'd kick him out the door so fast your head would spin.")

(Still no steaks, though. "Sigh," sighs Joe.)

(No steaks for you, either.)

A Rogers Avenue woman was held on $25,000 bail today after she refused to tell police about a gunfight between two men at the corner of Rogers Avenue and Midwood Street. 37-year-old Mrs. Mary Interliochia of 503 Rogers Avenue refused to answer questions when interrogated by detectives about the grudge between 54-year-old Frank Ottaviano of Arrochar, Staten Island and 49-year-old Peter Brucato of 56 Livingston Street, who staged the duel. Ottaviano, who was shot in the arm, was under arrest at Kings County Hospital, while Brucato was held on $500 bail in Brooklyn Felony Court on a felonious asssault charge and in $2500 bail on a Sullivan Law violation.

("HAH!" hahs Sally. "Atsa fois' time SHE neveh had nut'n t'say! Awrways she useta be runnin'eh mout' downa Dewes' Deli! Awrways got'teh beezeh in eve'body's bizness! Why, my ma said whe'nnem two guys was shootin' it out, her head come poppin outa'tat windeh like a boid inna cuckoo clock!" "I tawtcha said ya ma wan' home," interjects Joe. "She wasn'," snaps back Sally. "She on'y hoid. She din' see nut'n. She was inna deli, arguin' wit' ol' man' Dewes 'bout gettin' shawrted onna poun'a cawn beef. She din' even' look up." "Well, how'd she know bout t'is Mrs. Whatsis stickin'eh head out?" "She seena shadow, like wit' onea t'em, wha'yacawl, groun'hogs," Sally retorts. "Now eatcha briskit f're it congeals.")

(Y'hear that, Pete? IF HEADACHE PERSISTS SEE YOUR DOCTOR!)

(Smoothie. You pick that line up from Downwind Jaxon?)

(Beefcake!)

(Dan never smirked like that when Marsh was here. Oh, and "slab teeth?" All right for you, horse jaw)

(Just make with the eyes, and everything will be fine.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"Eggplant shaped gambler."

"All right, cuddles, let's see ya stand on ya head now!"

You can SO do better!

"And then there's Eleanor Roosevelt..." NOW WAIT, declares Harold Gray. "I CAN ONLY GO SO FAR."

"Sure is a funny way to spell SUGAR."

Furniture That Talks.

It's TWINS!

"Mmmmmm. Big and dumb."

One way or another, the house always wins.

"Think we oughta wire ahead an' tell Shadow he left his grip on the platform?" "Nah. Hey, I bet there's a cake in it!"

 

[Fading Fast]

...

(Jesus.)
...

No words.

...

A survey of the Brooklyn public concerning the recent case of a machinery salesman from the Bronx sentenced to thirty days in jail for disparaging the President and the war effort reveals only one man willing to speak up for the defendant. The majority of persons questions by an Eagle reporter on the sidewalk today refused to take a position on the case of Moses Elisberg one way or the other, with only Edward Wright of 317 E. 7th Street championing Elisberg's cause. "I don't think anyone should be put in jail for saying we are losing the war," declared Mr. Wright. "Everyone is entitled to his opinon." Mr. Wright hastened to add that he believes we are winning the war. Several persons questioned called the question, itself, subversive, and several others agreed with Mr. Wright that we are definitely winning the war, but did not endorse his support for Elisberg's right to speak his opinion.
...

The magistrate in this one didn't help with his muddled reasoning either.

...

("Oh, and if my husband tried to pull that with me, I'd kick him out the door so fast your head would spin.")
...

I agree with you, Lizzie, but I also know of two long-term marriages that survived an affair many years ago and, in one, I know the wife made the choice not to rip the family up over what she believed was (and appears to have proven to be) a one-off. I am not, repeat, not defending the cheating, but as was explained to me by the wife (obviously, a close friend), "I saved a family of five and an extended family of many more by not acting in the moment and I believe so many lives, mine included, are better for it today."

...

(No steaks for you, either.)
...

I remember my Dad sitting at his desk with a fist full of bills (but a full head of hair, sorry Lichty) "reminding" my mother and me how expensive things are. Mind you, ours was always a watch-every-dollar, turn-off-the-lights, you-don't-need-that household, but still, the "lectures" came. Today, with most bills being electronic, the dramatic effect of a fist full of bills will soon be lost to time.

...

A Rogers Avenue woman was held on $25,000 bail today after she refused to tell police about a gunfight between two men at the corner of Rogers Avenue and Midwood Street. 37-year-old Mrs. Mary Interliochia of 503 Rogers Avenue refused to answer questions when interrogated by detectives about the grudge between 54-year-old Frank Ottaviano of Arrochar, Staten Island and 49-year-old Peter Brucato of 56 Livingston Street, who staged the duel. Ottaviano, who was shot in the arm, was under arrest at Kings County Hospital, while Brucato was held on $500 bail in Brooklyn Felony Court on a felonious asssault charge and in $2500 bail on a Sullivan Law violation.

("HAH!" hahs Sally. "Atsa fois' time SHE neveh had nut'n t'say! Awrways she useta be runnin'eh mout' downa Dewes' Deli! Awrways got'teh beezeh in eve'body's bizness! Why, my ma said whe'nnem two guys was shootin' it out, her head come poppin outa'tat windeh like a boid inna cuckoo clock!" "I tawtcha said ya ma wan' home," interjects Joe. "She wasn'," snaps back Sally. "She on'y hoid. She din' see nut'n. She was inna deli, arguin' wit' ol' man' Dewes 'bout gettin' shawrted onna poun'a cawn beef. She din' even' look up." "Well, how'd she know bout t'is Mrs. Whatsis stickin'eh head out?" "She seena shadow, like wit' onea t'em, wha'yacawl, groun'hogs," Sally retorts. "Now eatcha briskit f're it congeals.")
...

"...her head come poppin outa'tat windeh like a boid inna cuckoo clock!" Nice.

Gotta give this round to Joe.

...


(Y'hear that, Pete? IF HEADACHE PERSISTS SEE YOUR DOCTOR!)
...

Another fantastic action picture.

...

(Beefcake!)
...

While I can see ways to leverage her invisibility for crime, the bank might catch on as the employees notice the money starting to "float" out toward the door.

And in the Daily News...

"Eggplant shaped gambler."
...

That is a Page Four classic sobriquet. Also, did you notice that our eggplant shaped gambler has the same lawyer as our old friend Madeline Webb, which I'm surprised didn't result in a file pic of Ms. Webb being shown. Finally, 240 Central Park South is a humongous rental building that is still there today. Back in the '90s, when that area was still cheap, I nearly rented an apartment in it because it had wood-burning fireplaces in many of its one-bedroom apartments. Now the area is fashionable and expensive as all heck.

It will be interesting to see what ultimately happens to Toni Jo as, as we saw with Ms. Webb, there was actually a #HeToo bias back then that worked in women's favor when it came to the death penalty.

...

"All right, cuddles, let's see ya stand on ya head now!"
...

I have no idea how it worked in 1942, but today, I've read anyway, that in NYC, if your sentence is less than a year (or there about), you never matriculate with the long-term prison population as they keep you in a kind of short-term limbo. But yes, our former lawyer here might be quickly "sobered up" by prison life and not just from a lack of alcohol.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Here's 503 Rogers Avenue, scene of yesterday's dramatic gun duel.

The deli where Sally's ma didn't see a thing is in the background, across Midwood Street. Banks Pharmacy is on the corner -- although the old people in the neighborhood still call it "Zimmerman's" -- and then 503 is Lieb's Candy Store, in front of which the shootout occured. Upstairs poking out his head the window might very well be Mary Interliochia's husband yelling "GO WAN WITCHA GUNS! WHATCHA T"INK, T'IS IS FIT' AVENEH? IS YA NAME ESPOSITA? GWAN BACK T' STATEN ISLAND WITCHEZ!"

 

[LizzieMaine]

(Tear gas on the IND? Well, at least it wasn't the BMT.)

A spokesman for General Douglas MacArthur admitted today that the Japanese have occupied the islands of Kai, Tanimbar, and Aroe, within 225 miles of mainland Australia and just 100 miles from northwestern New Guinea. The grave news of the occupation of the new island bases in the Karafura Sea within easy striking distance of both the Australian continent and New Guinea came at a moment when American and Australian authorities showed anger at the idea that there was anything in the Australian situation to justify complacence. General MacArthur's office reported that Allied medium bombers had raided the big Japanese bases on the north New Guinea coast without meeting attacking enemy planes.

The brother of former Pennsylvania governor Gifford Pinchot is in critical condition following a suicide attempt. Sixty-eight-year-old Amos R. E. Pinchot, a vociferous critic of the New Deal, slashed open several veins last night while visiting a friend in Westport, Connecticut, and was taken to Norwalk Hospital suffering from severe loss of blood. The Pinchot brothers bolted the Republican party in 1912 to join the Progressive "Bull Moose" movement led by Theodore Roosevelt. Amos Pinchot has been in poor health in recent months. Four years ago his daughter Rosamond Pinchot, an actress, took her own life by asphyxiation in a Long Island garage.

War Production Board chairman Donald L. Nelson has been strongly advised to "lop off a few heads" by the chairman of the Senate committee investigation war production issues. Senator Harry Truman (D-Mo.) stressed that in making that remark, he meant no personal criticism of Mr. Nelson himself, but he did mean to say that Nelson has surrounded himself with "incompetent associates" who "should be eliminated in the interest of integration of the whole war program. Sen. Truman gave no names of these "incompetent associates."

(Mr. McNaughton pitched 21 innings for the 1932 Red Sox, and you'll noticed the article doesn't identify him as a "major leaguer." Pitching for the 1932 Red Sox -- 43-111 -- would hardly qualify one for that title.)

The director of the News and Special Events Department of the National Broadcasting Company has resigned from that job effective immediately. A. A. Schecter, who has headed the NBC news division since its formation in 1932, will serve under former CBS newsman Elmer Davis with the Office of War Information in Washington.

Brooklyn's large retail stores played a vital role in putting the borough's war bond quota over the top, it was revealed today in the announcement that the Retailers for Victory Drive conducted during July produced total sales of $6,187.376 -- more than twice the $2,500,000 goal. Abraham & Straus reported the largest individual sales total of any participating retailer, selling $162,095 worth of bonds and stamps during July. Loeser's came in second with $58,062, and Namm's was third with $39,845. The several McCrory's five-and-ten cent stores around the borough combined for sales of $25,935.

(There are times, when the news is depressing and the weather is depressing, and life in general is depressing, when the dumb fun of a Tarzan movie is exactly what hits the spot. I do think they did miss the boat on this one, though, by not having Tarzan turn up at Ebbets Field.)

(What's good for the goose....)

(Kids Today.)

Mohamed Al Rashid, self-declared prince of Forest Hills, is again facing charges in Long Island City after allegedly striking James C. Handy of Manhattan over the head with his cane. Rashid and Handy had, according to police, "gotten into a discussion" over Rashid's friendship with Handy's wife Irene, a relationship which was at the center of the recent case in Magistrate's Court in which Mrs. Handy withdrew a charge of disorderly conduct against Rashid stemming from a visit by Rashid to the Handy home. Rashid was silent today during his arraignment on charges of assault in the third degree before Judge Matthew Troy. The case will come to trial on September 24th.

(It'll be easy enough to tell Reiser's silhouette. Just look for the lumps on the head. Oh, and you can spell Tommy Campanella's name right, but not Roy's?)

A $180,000 repair job is almost complete at Ebbets Field, with the replacement of steel support girders in a section of the old part of the grandstand. The original beams, dating to the park's construction in 1912, had rotted at the base due to water seepage thru the protective outer bricks pooling at their bottoms. The work, when completed, will ensure there is no further sagging of the structure.

(I dunno, there's something about Mr. Truman that makes me think he wears way too much cologne.)

(It's a pretty strange fetish to have, but I won't judge.)

(Careful, Dan, that's one of those nefarious "egg grenades!")

("Pretty sweet gig, huh Sandy?")

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"So I said okay, and I shot him. Hey, when do we eat?"

Mr. Paige is a man of supreme talents, but even his greatest boosters have noted that he isn't always a "team player."

"Lemonade POWDER? What's this all about?" "Sorry kids, you're in the Army now!"

I really wish I'd paid better attention in chemistry class.

Nice to see there's at least one adult on this base.

"I tell ya," insists Joe, "'at was Solly!" "Nah," dismisses Sally, "It coul'na been. 'At guy was *standin' up.* Ya can't shoot craps standin' up." "Sure ya can!" "What?" "Nut'n..."

"We gotta find it! Fortunately, we had a good breakfast this morning, and....uh oh."

Snipe always keeps her options open.

"An' you know how lumpy his head is -- I can never get the last bit of cereal!"

"And even worse, those twerps back home are eating my cake!"

 

[Fading Fast]

(Tear gas on the IND? Well, at least it wasn't the BMT.)
...

Good to see that the Woods verdict was possible in 1942 - there's hope and, as Lizzie says, there's a new world coming.

...

(Mr. McNaughton pitched 21 innings for the 1932 Red Sox, and you'll noticed the article doesn't identify him as a "major leaguer." Pitching for the 1932 Red Sox -- 43-111 -- would hardly qualify one for that title.)
...

I assume Page Four will have pics today or tomorrow of this made-to-order Page-Four story. Oh, and "dice girl -" wonderful.

...

Brooklyn's large retail stores played a vital role in putting the borough's war bond quota over the top, it was revealed today in the announcement that the Retailers for Victory Drive conducted during July produced total sales of $6,187.376 -- more than twice the $2,500,000 goal. Abraham & Straus reported the largest individual sales total of any participating retailer, selling $162,095 worth of bonds and stamps during July. Loeser's came in second with $58,062, and Namm's was third with $39,845. The several McCrory's five-and-ten cent stores around the borough combined for sales of $25,935.
...

Davega Stores raised $12,069 selling left-over WWI bonds at 75 cents on the dollar.

...

Mohamed Al Rashid, self-declared prince of Forest Hills, is again facing charges in Long Island City after allegedly striking James C. Handy of Manhattan over the head with his cane. Rashid and Handy had, according to police, "gotten into a discussion" over Rashid's friendship with Handy's wife Irene, a relationship which was at the center of the recent case in Magistrate's Court in which Mrs. Handy withdrew a charge of disorderly conduct against Rashid stemming from a visit by Rashid to the Handy home. Rashid was silent today during his arraignment on charges of assault in the third degree before Judge Matthew Troy. The case will come to trial on September 24th.
...

Assuming Al Rashid has genuine mental issues - which isn't a stretch based on what we know - social services should be working with this guy, but then and now, sadly, we really don't have a good plan until they do something much worse.

And in the Daily News...

"So I said okay, and I shot him. Hey, when do we eat?"
...

Fine, the story just broke and there weren't any pics on the wires yet, but by tomorrow, Page Four won't have that excuse. We need to see all three principals, with a pic of Moose a bonus, but a pic of "the dice girl" is a requirement. Page Four needs to remember why God put it on this earth.

...

Nice to see there's at least one adult on this base.
...

"By that time, he'll be so het up he'll blow the top of every mercury stick in the place." Not very subtle.

"Het up" a phrase definitively disappearing.

...

"We gotta find it! Fortunately, we had a good breakfast this morning, and....uh oh."
...

Not funny, Lizzie. Okay, a little bit funny, but we need to find her egg. Am I the only one who saw "March of the Penguins?"