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Clean Jokes

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Funkytown, USA
Chrissie arrives at work one day and, before starting her shift on the line, is talking to Jack...

"Jack, I'm really not in the mood to be here today. I'm going to get the day off."

"How are you going to do that, Chrissie?"

"Just watch."

At that time the foreman, Mr. Roper, comes around the corner and finds Chrissie hanging upside down from the rafters.

"Chrissie, what are you doing up there? Get down!"

Chrissie exclaims, "I'm a light bulb!"

"OK, Chrissie, you're obviously under a lot of stress, why don't you take the day off?"

Chrissie winks at Jack and heads for the door; Jack starts following her out.

"Hey, Jack!" cries Mr. Roper, "I didn't give you the day off!"

Jack replies, "You expect me to work in the dark?"
 

Turnip

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7f2f8af0b9e5ca63fc6bb2fe26443dd96798.jpg
 
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12,974
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Germany
Not really a joke, but I like it!

In Germany, we usally ask someone/kid, who notifies to have to visit "Mr. Ceramic" underways, what his need is:
Small or Big?

In the US, you ask:
No.1 or No.2 ?

I always liked the US-version! No idea, why we never imported that to old Germany. :D
 
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12,974
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Germany
Same here. I'm willing to bet that if I'd go to any railway station in the middle of the summer and shout 'Winter!', every train would instantly be 2 hours late...

Actually, high-summer is enough to bring german railroad in trouble. Our trains/multiple units behave grumpy, our rails moan, but A/C is still working.
But depends on how long high-summer temps last. This year, we got luckily very less high-summer days, so things actually work still okay.

Only, if +30°C temps would last more than ten days, the maximum trouble would start.
 
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