The Era -- Day By Day

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and...

A little early to panic, isn't it?

 

[Fading Fast]

View attachment 510687
("Whassis?" asks Joe, as Sally hands him a small window envelope with a War & Navy Department return address printed in the corner. "Solly," comes the reply. "Lookit -- it's a letteh f'm Solly." "FINALLY!" exhales Joe, ripping the envelope open and extracting the single folded sheet inside. "Um," he ums, squinting at the tiny photo-reduced scrawl on the page. "I don' t'ink my eyes is awake yet. Heeh, you read it." Adjusting her glasses, Sally reads. "Deah Joe an' Sal," she begins. "I'm sorry I haven't been able to write sooneh -- I know it's been a while since I could send you a few lines. But I have been laid up f'ra while -- seems I let myself get inna way when one'a -- an'nis pawrt is scribbled out -- was shootin' off a gun. It ain' awlat serious, t'ey got me inna right shouldeh, so writin' has not been easy t'do. But now t'at t'ey have sent me back t'my unit, I c'n fin'ly let ya know I am O. K. an' doin' fine. T'ey give me a medal while I was inna hospital an' I dunno what t'do wit' it out heeh. I know a lotta t'boys has got 'em so t'ey're isn' much pernt in braggin' 'bout it, an' 'tey ain' even woit' nut'n inna cawrd game. Anyway, t'at is how I am. How about you an' Sal an' t'baby? I bet she is getting big now an' I bet she's gettin' loud too, jus' like her ma, ha ha." Joe stifles a snicker as Sally glares over the top of her spectacles. "One moeh t'ing, Joe. You remembeh t'at five dollehs I borrehed f'm ya t'day I lef' f'camp. I want you should t'nex' chance y'get, t'go see Iggy Peltzman inna office at t' pickle woiks. Unless t'ey are real desp'rate f'men inna draft, he shu'd still be t'eah. Tell him I said t' ten dollehs he owes me he shu'd give t'you. T'at will squaeh you an' me an' put ya five bucks ahead b'sides. You have awrways been a pal t'me, Joe, an' in case anyt'ing else should hap'n t'me, I would wanta know t'at we was squaeh. Write an' let me know you done t'is, an' let me know how t'ings are wit' you. Hope you get to see a bawl game a'two f'me t'is summeh an' tell Sal I hope Petey hits t'ree hun'red f't Pittsboigs t'is yeeah. Ya pal, Pvt. Fois' Class S. J. Pincus U-S-A." Sally hands Joe the note and turns her head toward the window. She dabs at her eyes with a dishtowel as Joe gazes at the page.)
...

Sally's not the only one dabbing at her eyes.

...

(I don't think this is how it works.)
...

I'm guessing Kurras is not in service because he failed the not-at-all-challenging IQ standard for induction.

...

(Ah, a rubber-hose interrogation. I was wondering how long it would take for that to come out. )
...

This case has been an embarrassment from the beginning as there seemed to be no evidence against these guys except for the confession, which as we learned today, not surprisingly, was beaten out of them. I can't believe Turkus brought this one to trial.

...

The soldier who figured in the recent Ursula Parrott case in Miami, Florida, is jailed in Charleston, South Carolina on narcotics charges. Private Michael N. Bryan, a former guitarist with a popular swing band, and accused paramour of the well-known novelist, was arrested at Fort Jackson, S. C. yesterday on a warrant issued by a U. S. Marshal of the Southern District of New York. He will be returned to New York tomorrow.
...

Wonder if Ursula's libido is contemplating aiding another prison break?

...

(Better watch out, Sandy -- once he gets rid of these two, this cat is coming for YOU.)
...

Insecure and papered Sandy could easily be goaded into doing a lot of stupid things, but giving up his creature comforts isn't one of them.

"The spirit of ancestral wolves courses through my blood!"

Oh God, maybe I spoke too soon.

And in the Daily News

EW.
...

You know something is seriously wrong when you can't keep all the stories about high school girls being used as prostitutes straight.

And I know it's just something you say, but if your daughter running a prostitute ring of 15-year-olds doesn't make her a "bad girl," what does?

...

Just how big is that pit, anyway?
...

We need the schematic.

Oh, and...

A little early to panic, isn't it?

It's reasonable to assume that the overlap between baseball fans and young men now in service is pretty darn big.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

The column regarding the schoolgirl vice ring is appalling but intrigues yet not for sin but substance
and the juvenile mindset implicit these crimes. Terrence has me stumped. I read dutifully because I don't
want to fall behind the march.

 

[LizzieMaine]

For those who are tuning in late, the two Chinese soldiers we've been following the past week are associates of Terry and his mentor Pat Ryan -- the little guy with the big ears is Connie, who is about Terry's age, and who acted as Pat and Terry's interpreter and guide during their prewar adventures across China. His pidgin English masks a talent for guerilla fighting and commando tactics. The big guy is known only as "Big Stoop," because it's a "big stoop" for him to bend down to normal height. He is a former slave of the Dragon Lady, who annoyed her one day and in reprisal she had his tongue hacked out. Hence, he is mute. Terry, Pat, and Connie rescued him from a situation some years ago, and he joined their group as bodyguard. He may look like he's a gentle giant, but if you cross him he'll kill you where you stand. And Pat, who I expect we'll be seeing any day now, is a curly-haired handsome devil who claims to be a "writer" who never actually writes anything, and who, most likely, has been an undercover intelligence operative all along. It will be interesting to see what he's been up to since we last saw him, working as an agent of the Dragon Lady.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Twelve t'ousan' casualties," muses Joe. "An' one of'm was Solly. Y'read t'is stuff inna papeh awla time but when it's somebody y'know, it's diff'nt." "I won'eh wheah Mickey is right now," ponders Sally. "He'll be awright," reassures Joe. "He awrways is." "He's neveh had people shoot'n at 'im befoeh," counters Sally. "Really?" queries Joe. Sally shoots him a look. "I mean -- " he stammers, "-- uh -- well, what I mean is, whatcha say we take inna bawl game Sunday. Prob'ly t'las' chance we'eh gonna get f'ra while." "Yeah," sighs Sally. "One las' bit a nawrm'l.")

In Rockville Center, classmates acted as pallbearers for two of the ten Sea Scouts who drowned on Monday when their boat foundered in Great Salt Bay off Sayville, Long Island. More than 400 village residents attended services at St. Mark's Methodist Church for 15-year-old Arthur Thornton and 16-year-old Arthur F. Brown, as squads of Sea Scouts, Boy Scouts, and the American Legion formed a guard of honor at the church entrance. "These boys were not on a lark," declared the Rev. Karl F. Moore, church pastor, in his eulogy for the two. "They were preparing themselves for life."

Selective Service examinations of wives are underway today, as local draft boards respond to claims by men seeking exemptions because, they claim, their wives are ill or otherwise unable to care for themselves. New York City Selective Service Director Col. Arthur V. McDermott says that the examinations have been ordered by about twenty local draft boards already, and will likely be extended to all 280 boards under his jurisdiction in cases where a man is seeking an exemption on such grounds. The examinations are being ordered in cases where a childless married man requests an exemption on the grounds that his wife is incapacitated, and presents a doctor's certificate attesting to such. The local board will then request that the wife substantiate this claim by presenting herself for a medical examination. In twelve such cases handled by Local Board No. 23, for example, six of the "incapacitated" wives were found to have nothing physically wrong with them. Col. McDermott acknowledges that Selective Service, having no jurisdiction over wives of registrants, cannot order them to appear for examination, but in cases where the request is refused, the burden of proof remains on the registrant in seeking an exemption -- and, draft officials emphasize, "his answers better be good."

(This ball thing better be resolved quick, if only to avoid a public relations disaster which already seems to be in full swing. Maybe MacPhail left some of his yellow balls around. Meanwhile up in Boston, a sportswriter will nominate the driver who ran Ol' Case down as the person who has done the most for Boston baseball in 1943. Because that's what Boston sportswriters are like.)

While the major leagues fuss and fret over dead balls, weak attendance, and the continuing impact of the draft, one manager out in Michigan has a little less to worry about. Mickey Cochrane, who won two pennants as pilot of the Tigers, now manages the baseball squad at the Great Lakes Naval Training Station, and is pleased to receive as the latest addition to his roster, the mighty ex-Cardinal and Giant first baseman Johnny Mize. Last year, Cochrane's sailor boys, most of them young minor-league prospects, racked up a record of 62 wins against 14 losses, for a sparkling winning percentage of .818, but most of that squad has since shipped out to combat duty, leaving Mickey to rebuild with new recruits. Mr. Mize is the most bona-fide of the scattering of big leaguers on the Great Lakes roster, and will be on the field when they open their season tomorrow against the minor-league Louisville Colonels.

The Eagle Editorialist declares that it's necessary to "seek the adults responsible" in cases of juvenile crime, like the recent case of the 23-year-old soldier who masterminded a schoolboy burglary ring, or that of the middle-aged candy store man who recruited and trained a gang of youthful shoplifters. "When children and teen-agers are involved in crime," the EE declares, "it is wise to look for the adult in the background. Usually he is lurking somewhere in the picture. And once found, no leniency or mercy should be shown him."

(How to reply without replying.)

("Reveille with Beverly" was a real morning-wakeup show out on the West Coast, originating at KNX in Los Angeles, and the real Beverly, whose real name is Jean Ruth Hay, acts as the technical advisor. So when Ann Miller cues up the platters, you know she's doing it right!)

(While Doc is usually kind of a dink, I do have to salute him for his defense of the feline today. I've had cats sit on my chest and lick my nose, but I never had the sense they were "sucking my breath." Get a grip.)

("Awwwwww, THAT guy....")

(Kindova comedown from "The Little Foxes," but hey, work is work...)

("I used to be able to ask dumb obvious questions like that too," sniffs Irwin.)

(I mean, "sucking the breath out." Where's the artistry in that?)

(Jo never did this herself, but it's not that she wasn't tempted.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Aw, not the Savoy! Not the "Home of Happy Feet!"

An elephant playing baseball?? Well, if Herman doesn't work out at third...

If she doesn't slap your sassy face, The Skippuh will!

"It's fantastic! Pardon me while I call my broker!"

"Hey, where's the kid? Have you seen the kid lately?"

Yep, just like a slick nickel!

"My draft status! She's too healthy!"

"Well, I suppose you'll be wanting your watch back. THERE GOES MY PULITZER."

I still want to know what young, single perfectly healthy Moon is doing down at the plant that's so absolutely essential that he gets a II-B.

"OUCH!"

 

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and...

Didn't ANYBODY in the Commissioner's Office or at Spalding actually test this ball before approving it?

 

[Fading Fast]

...

Selective Service examinations of wives are underway today, as local draft boards respond to claims by men seeking exemptions because, they claim, their wives are ill or otherwise unable to care for themselves. New York City Selective Service Director Col. Arthur V. McDermott says that the examinations have been ordered by about twenty local draft boards already, and will likely be extended to all 280 boards under his jurisdiction in cases where a man is seeking an exemption on such grounds. The examinations are being ordered in cases where a childless married man requests an exemption on the grounds that his wife is incapacitated, and presents a doctor's certificate attesting to such. The local board will then request that the wife substantiate this claim by presenting herself for a medical examination. In twelve such cases handled by Local Board No. 23, for example, six of the "incapacitated" wives were found to have nothing physically wrong with them. Col. McDermott acknowledges that Selective Service, having no jurisdiction over wives of registrants, cannot order them to appear for examination, but in cases where the request is refused, the burden of proof remains on the registrant in seeking an exemption -- and, draft officials emphasize, "his answers better be good."
...

Whichever agency licenses doctors should be looking into the doctors of the six women who were healthy, but had doctor notes attesting otherwise.

...

(This ball thing better be resolved quick, if only to avoid a public relations disaster which already seems to be in full swing. Maybe MacPhail left some of his yellow balls around. Meanwhile up in Boston, a sportswriter will nominate the driver who ran Ol' Case down as the person who has done the most for Boston baseball in 1943. Because that's what Boston sportswriters are like.)
...

Fitz should hurl a game before they switch in the faster balls.

...

The Eagle Editorialist declares that it's necessary to "seek the adults responsible" in cases of juvenile crime, like the recent case of the 23-year-old soldier who masterminded a schoolboy burglary ring, or that of the middle-aged candy store man who recruited and trained a gang of youthful shoplifters. "When children and teen-agers are involved in crime," the EE declares, "it is wise to look for the adult in the background. Usually he is lurking somewhere in the picture. And once found, no leniency or mercy should be shown him."
...

Agreed. The mystery still remains though, was there an adult behind that first high school prostitute ring? It seems like, amazingly, there wasn't or they haven't found him or her yet.

...

("Awwwwww, THAT guy....")
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What does Mary do all day in a rented room while these girls are running around earning a living?

In that day (and wrong as it is), the name Lou Varzoni, used in a comicstrip, almost guarantees you he's not square.

...

("I used to be able to ask dumb obvious questions like that too," sniffs Irwin.)
...

But you're not a cute young girl, Irwin. It's harsh, but those are the facts of the business. Fat and goofy sidekicks don't attract the young demographic the way cute girls do. You might want to see if "Bo" has any walk-on work available.

"Sniff, I'll call over."

And in the Daily News...

Aw, not the Savoy! Not the "Home of Happy Feet!"
...

I'd bet big that prostitutes do operate out of the Savoy, but I'd bet big that prostitutes operate out of every single nightclub in NYC. Oh, and I'd bet big that some of them transmit venereal disease.

...

"Hey, where's the kid? Have you seen the kid lately?"
...

"Oh, the Kid, she went to get a bucket and mop. That nervous dog of hers had another 'accident' when we mentioned the Tommy guns."

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Yep, just like a slick nickel!
...

I'd bet the first time this was an accidental discovery when someone happened to spill acid on metal and, then, saw the "shadow" printing. The science was figured out afterwards.

Oh, and...

Didn't ANYBODY in the Commissioner's Office or at Spalding actually test this ball before approving it?

You probably can't order soap for the men's room at Spalding's factory without filling out a form in triplicate and getting two senior signatures, but the new major league baseball wasn't tested. I've worked for companies like that.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Speaking of the dead ball -- notice that Toronto and Baltimore played a 22 inning game that ended in a 2-2 tie. What do they use for a ball in the International League, a wad of old tape?

Gawdawmighty. Figures Cobb would like it.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Wheah'sawlla people?" mutters Joe, as he stands in a short line approaching a ticket cage in the marble rotunda at Ebbets Field. "T'is ain' nut'n. Hey Sal! Whered'ja go?" "I was oveh by t'main gate t'eah tawkin' t'Hilda. She rung'eh bell f'Leonoreh, dincha heah? Oh, an' get t'is. Y'know t'at movie t'eah makin'?" "T' one wit' Red Skeleton?" "Yeh, I mean, what ot'eh movie? Anyways, Hilda says *she* is gonna be *IN* it. Can ya beat t'at?" "Huh!" huhs Joe. "Hilda Lamawrrr!" "Nah," shrugs Sally, gripping Leonora's hand. "She says she ain' gonna be one'a t'em high hat stawrs goes changin' her name t'get ahead." "Yeah, I guess t'eah's a few cella-bruties keeps t'eahr'own name. I mean, Jinx Fawlkenboig. Dorot'y Kilgallen." "What?" "Nut'n.")

The House Democratic leadership last night called on Republicans to support the latest Administration pay-as-you-go tax plan, as a demonstration of wartime unity. House Majority Leader John McCormack of Massachusetts pleaded with his "Republican friends" to support the measure approved yesterday by the House Ways and Means Committee, declaring that such action would convey to our enemies "the unity of our people." The new bill proposes to cancel 44 percent of the 1942 personal income tax liability by applying the 1941 tax rates to that income, with the uncancellable remainder to be paid over a period spread out for three years. Recalling the Administration's former "no forgiveness" stand on the taxation of 1942 income, Rep. McCormack called the new measure an example of the Administration's willingness to "compromise their views in the interests of unity." A vote on the new proposal in the full House is expected on May 4th.

The chief of staff of the outlawed Irish Republican Army warned the United States today that its troops stationed in Northern Ireland are likely to become involved in hostilities against the Irish Republic. Hugh McAteer, IRA leader with a price on his head of 3000 British pounds -- $12,000 -- made an audacious appearance before an audience of armed IRA men in Belfast, in a motion picture theatre seized by those men for the occasion in commemoration of the Easter Rebellion of 1916. McAteer, for whom police have been searching since he broke out of Belfast prison in January, appeared on the theatre stage alongside James Steele, one of three men who broke jail with him. The seizure of the theatre by the IRA men was accomplished with "Hollywood theatricalism." The film suddenly stopped, and the house lights came up to reveal armed men standing at each exit. McAteer then strode out onto the stage and commanded "sit still and listen!" He then made a speech protesting the presence of American troops on Irish soil, calling it "an invasion of our rights," and warned that should Americans take up arms on the side of the British it would amount to "a war of aggression and conquest against the Irish people."

Severance of diplomatic relations between the United States and Finland appear to be imminent, as a harbinger of all-out Allied prosecution of the war. The problem of U. S. diplomatic personnel in Helsinki has been likened to that of American diplomats interned by the Vichy government after the Allied invasion of North Africa, and the State Department undoubtedly does not wish a repeat of that situation with the Helsinki legation. Although Washington would undoubtedly prefer to maintain relations with the Finns for as long as possible, using the Helsinki legation as "an open window into the Nazis' European stronghold," pressure on the Finnish Government from Germany may force a break sooner than later.

A prowler shot and killed by police in Flatbush early yesterday has been identified as the infamous "Lone Wolf" burglar, who long crime career was interrupted in 1935 by a prison sentence. Radio patrolmen responded yesterday morning to a call summoning them to a house at 1610 Foster Avenue, where a burglary was in progress. They arrived to find a screen broken out of a rear window, but no evidence of entry. A street patrolman shortly thereafter confronted a man he found crouching in bushes two blocks away from that house, and when the man jumped up and fled, the policeman, Ptl. William McNeice of the Parkville precinct, fired first a warning shot and then a shot into the suspect's back. The man continued running until he fell over, and was dead when an ambulance surgeon arrived. Detectives identified him as 40-year-old Frank Bennett, veteran burglar, who once dived thru a plate glass window to escape from police who had trapped him inside a store. He had mainly operated in Flatbush during his fifteen-year crime career, and was known for never carrying a gun. Detectives examining his body found no weapon on his person, but recovered a quantity of jewelry in his pockets, believed to be the loot from two recent burglaries.

(Miss Mead is the second woman to earn an electrical engineering degree from Cornell University. And she's charming too!)

Old TImer Bedford Berry remembers the days of thirty years ago, when the Black Hand, a terroristic organization, blackmailed business and professional men in Brooklyn by sending them ominous letters demanding money and threatening dire consequences if the demand was not met. "Like all such organizations, it disappeared when its threats were not always heeded." But its activities were noted by pranksters, notes Mr. Berry, among them a group of youths who thought it humorous to send a "Black Hand" letter to Canon Chase, the rector of the Christ Protestant Episcopal Church on Bedford Avenue. The youths also thought to detonate a firecracker near the church as the letter arrived, so as to give it the ring of authenticity.The Canon responded by summoning the police, who combed the neighborhood for those responsible, but never succeeded in identifying them.

Reader Lester Knapp writes in to praise the 1943 Dodgers as the most "live and civically interested" team the borough has ever had, and he predicts the National League race will stack up as follows: Brooklyn, St. Louis, Cincinnati, Chicago, Pittsburgh, New York, Boston, and Philadelphia. "Let us fans who still remain at home help in every way to boost our team and thereby our outstanding borough!"

(Seems kind of wasteful of a limited resource. Who needs a lively ball to beat the Phils?)

The Los Angeles Angels of the Pacific Coast League have become the first minor league club to retire a uniform number. The number 8, worn by veteran player-manager Jigger Statz has been taken out of use in his honor. Statz retired as manager following the 1942 season, after eighteen years with the club, first as player and then as pilot, and the tribute was ordered by club president Clarence "Pants" Rowland. Statz's 2790 games for the Angels stands as a Pacific Coast League record.

(Nazi agents were rampant in Mexico in the '30s, until Camacho put a stop to it.)

WIth all the wartime dramas filming these days in Hollywood there's a desperate shortage -- of Nazi uniforms. The makers of RKO's "Hitler's Children" needed so much Nazi regalia that the supply available from costume houses was exhausted, forcing them to improvise. The costume department at the studio found that with a bit of work, ordinary American police uniforms could be made over into convincing Nazi attire, especially the black uniforms favored by SS and Elite Guard units. These were adapted so successfully they could fool Hermann Goering himself. Likewise, American police caps were easily turned into Nazi headwear with just a bit of trimming and a change of insignia.

("Consarn it, this is a barrel of gunpowder! Oh well, DRINK UP BOYS!")

("Mr. Ford, sir, do you really think that you should sing that particular hymn? It has the same melody as 'Deutschland uber Alles.'" "Oh. Ah. Yes. That's it. 'The same melody.'")

(Tsk. And poor Irwin can't even get a job.)

(This is clearly a doomed relationship.)

(Hey Mary, remember that phony Colonel Cardsharp or whatever his name was, that you were all hepped about? He was about your age, wasn't he? And meanwhile, in his dark and lonely room, Irwin reaches into a paper bag, unwraps another cold hamburger, and sobs.)

(Aw, no more Scrap Book? I actually look forward to these. Will we get a Sunday Bungles in its place?)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Stags and old roosters? Yeah, we get a lot of those on Page Four.

You'd be more popular if you smiled more.

Well aren't we full of forensic science today!

"Not for childish hands to play with?" And Little Annie laughed and laughed.

Oh boy, a scavenger hunt!

Is this any way to treat your stepfather?

NEXT TIME USE V-MAIL!

Well helllllllllllllloooo!

You're getting old, boys.

I have to admit that I admire Emmy for being able to keep the weight off no matter how old she gets. WHAT'S YOUR SECRET, HON?

 

[Fading Fast]

("Wheah'sawlla people?" mutters Joe, as he stands in a short line approaching a ticket cage in the marble rotunda at Ebbets Field. "T'is ain' nut'n. Hey Sal! Whered'ja go?" "I was oveh by t'main gate t'eah tawkin' t'Hilda. She rung'eh bell f'Leonoreh, dincha heah? Oh, an' get t'is. Y'know t'at movie t'eah makin'?" "T' one wit' Red Skeleton?" "Yeh, I mean, what ot'eh movie? Anyways, Hilda says *she* is gonna be *IN* it. Can ya beat t'at?" "Huh!" huhs Joe. "Hilda Lamawrrr!" "Nah," shrugs Sally, gripping Leonora's hand. "She says she ain' gonna be one'a t'em high hat stawrs goes changin' her name t'get ahead." "Yeah, I guess t'eah's a few cella-bruties keeps t'eahr'own name. I mean, Jinx Fawlkenboig. Dorot'y Kilgallen." "What?" "Nut'n.")
...

Kudos Joe. He really snuck that one in. I didn't see it coming at all.

...

A prowler shot and killed by police in Flatbush early yesterday has been identified as the infamous "Lone Wolf" burglar, who long crime career was interrupted in 1935 by a prison sentence. Radio patrolmen responded yesterday morning to a call summoning them to a house at 1610 Foster Avenue, where a burglary was in progress. They arrived to find a screen broken out of a rear window, but no evidence of entry. A street patrolman shortly thereafter confronted a man he found crouching in bushes two blocks away from that house, and when the man jumped up and fled, the policeman, Ptl. William McNeice of the Parkville precinct, fired first a warning shot and then a shot into the suspect's back. The man continued running until he fell over, and was dead when an ambulance surgeon arrived. Detectives identified him as 40-year-old Frank Bennett, veteran burglar, who once dived thru a plate glass window to escape from police who had trapped him inside a store. He had mainly operated in Flatbush during his fifteen-year crime career, and was known for never carrying a gun. Detectives examining his body found no weapon on his person, but recovered a quantity of jewelry in his pockets, believed to be the loot from two recent burglaries.
...

Fitting for the era that he was found with pilfered jewelry in his pockets. He died as he lived.

...

(Hey Mary, remember that phony Colonel Cardsharp or whatever his name was, that you were all hepped about? He was about your age, wasn't he? And meanwhile, in his dark and lonely room, Irwin reaches into a paper bag, unwraps another cold hamburger, and sobs.)
...

Still not sure what Mary is even doing there, but yes, she's on shaky ground.

Apparently, the call over to "Bo" didn't go well as we know Irwin is a stress eater.

...

(Aw, no more Scrap Book? I actually look forward to these. Will we get a Sunday Bungles in its place?)

I'll miss Scrap Book too. I'm surprised, in today's strip, it left out, possibly, the most famous Easter "eggs" of all, the Imperial Faberge eggs giving by the Czar as gifts, mainly, to his wife and daughters. Perhaps, in a nod to our wartime ally, the writer/editor decided to not bring up the Czar in this light.

...

Well aren't we full of forensic science today!
...

The problem with for-hire murderers is that if they discover you're coming into a lot of money because of the murder they committed on your behalf, they'll return to blackmail you. It's just so darn difficult to find a person of integrity who will kill someone for money.

...

"Not for childish hands to play with?" And Little Annie laughed and laughed.
...

"What? Oh, okay, I'll get the bucket and mop again; today was way too much for him. There, there boy, don't worry, you can't help it."

"I vill celebrate mit gratefruit!" Gray had fun coming up with that line.

...

Well helllllllllllllloooo!...

And with a beard.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("T'eah now, kiddo," says Joe, settling Leonora in her high chair. "Gonna getcha s'm lunch now. Hey, wan'at a fun bawl game ye'stday? Oh, sueh, maybe we dit'n win, but'cha got t'meet ol' Bobo Newsom in poisson! Come right up t't bleachehs an' sol'us a bond!" "Faaaaaaat!" giggles Leonora. "He ain' really so fat t'ough, is he? I mean, not like Fitz a'nut'n. No, he's jus' a lit'l tubby, t'at's awl." "Da!" Leonora bubbles, poking her father in his midriff. "Now, c'mon now, honey, t'at ain' nice. He'eh now, gonna give ya some'a t'is -- uh, says onna jawr 'Beef.' Well, eat up now, 'at's moeh'n ya ol' man is gett'n" "Ma!" protests Leonora, vigorously shaking her head. "Ya ma ain' heeh right now," explains Joe. "She's gone awlaway oveh t'Joisey. She got a job! Gonna make stuff f't'phone com'pny a' sump'n." "JOB!" repeats Leonora, slapping her tray for emphasis. "Yep," replies Joe. "Ya ma got a job now, an' ya pa got a job, so I'm gonna take ya oveh t'y' Granma's f'ra bit lateh on, huh? You like t'at?" "Nick'ls!" giggles Leonora. "Yeah," chuckles Joe, "ya gran'ma got a job too. But we don' tawk too mucha'bout'tat, now, do we? Shhhhh!" "Stella job?" inquires Leonora. "Nah," shrugs Joe, "Stella ain' got no job, she's livin' off t'fat a' t'lan'." "Stella JOB!" insists Leonora, gnashing her teeth and emitting a ferocious growl. She points under the stove, where Joe turns to see Stella gnawing the head off a good-sized mouse. "Well, I guess ya right at t'at," agrees Joe. "Stella got a job too! Keep 'em flyin'!")

A large Japanese convoy has shifted westward out of range of Allied bombers which set fires on New Guinea's North Coast, a spokesman said today. The spokesman said the convoy attacked briefly near Wewak by a reconnaissance plane Saturday had pushed on toward the Pekau Islands. The raid on the Wewak airdrome yesterday climaxed a weekend of attacks that cost the Japanese 15 planes, and ranged thruout the 2000-mile enemy held island arc above Australia. Over Warwek on Saturday, a lone Liberator destroyed a dozen Zeros.

The Soviet and German high commands are reported regrouping their armies today along the vast 1800-mile front with only air and pistol skirmishes breaking the lull in fighting. Both sides are said to be drawing up battle lines for what may be a showdown battle this summer, with observers anticipating that the Nazis will begin their offensive as soon as the mud dries from the spring thaw.

The Administration Building of the Marine Corps detail in the Naval Supply Depot at Bayonne, New Jersey is a smoking ruin today following the second big waterfront fire in the metropolitan area within the past 24 hours. Fire broke out in the Marine building at the foot of 34th Street in Bayonne just before 12:30 yesterday afternoon, less than two miles from where a munitions ship was destroyed in a spectacular blaze on Saturday night. The fire in the building spread so rapidly that many of the Marines inside were unable to recover their personal effects before fleeing. The ship burned with equal ferocity as fire boats hauled it from its berth at Jersey City and into open water before opening the seacocks and flooding the superstructure. Mayor LaGuardia, who witnessed the ship fire from a police launch, called the vessel "a floating bomb," and voiced high praise for the men who prevented the ship from exploding. "We thought any minute we might be gone," said the Mayor, "But thank God we went thru it safely."

Red "E" ration stamps in War Ration Book No. 2 become valid today for the purchase of meat, cheese, butter, canned fish, fats, and oils, and will remain valid thru the end of May. On successive Sundays during May, red stamps F, G, H, and J will also become active. The Office of Price Administration indicates that ceiling prices for beef and lamb to be reduced on May 17th will be cut an additional one to seven cents per pound lower than had previously been stated.

(A busy day for Butch. I wonder if he wore an Easter hat to the fire?)

(How can you possibly go wrong with Jon Hall, Maria Montez, and Sabu?)

("Essence L'Bouef?" Mr. Lichty isn't taking rationing well.)

A 46-year-old automobile washer from Brownsville pleaded guilty yesterday to possession of policy slips. Frank Smith of 1469 East New York Avenue was arraigned before Magistrate Charles Solomon on a complaint signed by Patrolman Edward Kaye charging that 24 sets of policy slips were found in Smith's apartment, concealed in a book entitled "Jehovah." Smith told the magistrate he had been reading the book, but denied that it was his, claiming that it was in fact left at his home by a woman boarder who had since died. "Do you read the Bible?" questioned the Magistrate. Smith replied that he did. "Did you ever," the Magistrate continued, "ever think of trying to get an inspiration by reading the Book of Numbers?"

(Thanks for reminding us that we won eight in a row to end last season and still didn't win the pennant. THAT MAKES IT GO DOWN EASIER.)

Out at Dexter Park, the Bushwicks are following the example of the Dodgers and are using 1942 National League balls instead of the stone-dead 1943 spheres, and former Phillie outfielder Eddie Boland took advantage of the opportunity to swat two homers as Max Rosner's boys swept the Cuban Stars in an Easter doubleheader. Along with defeating the Negro National Leaguers 3-0 and 6-1, the Bushwicks sponsored a between-games bond sale conducted by the American Women's Volunteer Service which realized $4000 in sales.

(There's a reason why Ruby Keeler should always listen to Joan Blondell.)

(The real Tallulah would sic her pet lion on him.)

(Oh look, food you can read by!)

(And best of all rabbits aren't rationed!)

(Tsk. You aren't even asking for security? What would your mother say to that?)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

With all the frills upon it...

Yeah, I know, but I could really go for some chow mein right now.

Hope that watch is "juice resistant."

Point of order: why go to all the trouble of doing this when you could buy a plain, unmarked, untraceable knife at any dime store? WHY MAKE IT SO COMPLICATED?

How little you understand us.

"Yipe! A woman!" Jeez, Pat, the Navy has changed you.

Careful, Sal, these plants are full of smooth operators.

"All right, now how do we get out of this barrel?"

Memory is a selective thing.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and...

Get ahold of yourself, toots. He only went to Massapequa.

 

[Fading Fast]

("T'eah now, kiddo," says Joe, settling Leonora in her high chair. "Gonna getcha s'm lunch now. Hey, wan'at a fun bawl game ye'stday? Oh, sueh, maybe we dit'n win, but'cha got t'meet ol' Bobo Newsom in poisson! Come right up t't bleachehs an' sol'us a bond!" "Faaaaaaat!" giggles Leonora. "He ain' really so fat t'ough, is he? I mean, not like Fitz a'nut'n. No, he's jus' a lit'l tubby, t'at's awl." "Da!" Leonora bubbles, poking her father in his midriff. "Now, c'mon now, honey, t'at ain' nice. He'eh now, gonna give ya some'a t'is -- uh, says onna jawr 'Beef.' Well, eat up now, 'at's moeh'n ya ol' man is gett'n" "Ma!" protests Leonora, vigorously shaking her head. "Ya ma ain' heeh right now," explains Joe. "She's gone awlaway oveh t'Joisey. She got a job! Gonna make stuff f't'phone com'pny a' sump'n." "JOB!" repeats Leonora, slapping her tray for emphasis. "Yep," replies Joe. "Ya ma got a job now, an' ya pa got a job, so I'm gonna take ya oveh t'y' Granma's f'ra bit lateh on, huh? You like t'at?" "Nick'ls!" giggles Leonora. "Yeah," chuckles Joe, "ya gran'ma got a job too. But we don' tawk too mucha'bout'tat, now, do we? Shhhhh!" "Stella job?" inquires Leonora. "Nah," shrugs Joe, "Stella ain' got no job, she's livin' off t'fat a' t'lan'." "Stella JOB!" insists Leonora, gnashing her teeth and emitting a ferocious growl. She points under the stove, where Joe turns to see Stella gnawing the head off a good-sized mouse. "Well, I guess ya right at t'at," agrees Joe. "Stella got a job too! Keep 'em flyin'!")
...

The movie-box-office bandit almost wanted to be caught, but you have to respect his style of using cabs.

It's amazing to see Shonbrun and Cullen about to go to the chair so quickly after their trial. Ms. Webb got lucky.

"Et tu, Joe" - Fredie Fitzsimmons

...

The Administration Building of the Marine Corps detail in the Naval Supply Depot at Bayonne, New Jersey is a smoking ruin today following the second big waterfront fire in the metropolitan area within the past 24 hours. Fire broke out in the Marine building at the foot of 34th Street in Bayonne just before 12:30 yesterday afternoon, less than two miles from where a munitions ship was destroyed in a spectacular blaze on Saturday night. The fire in the building spread so rapidly that many of the Marines inside were unable to recover their personal effects before fleeing. The ship burned with equal ferocity as fire boats hauled it from its berth at Jersey City and into open water before opening the seacocks and flooding the superstructure. Mayor LaGuardia, who witnessed the ship fire from a police launch, called the vessel "a floating bomb," and voiced high praise for the men who prevented the ship from exploding. "We thought any minute we might be gone," said the Mayor, "But thank God we went thru it safely."
...

One assumes the FBI is looking into this as it feels like how a saboteur would work.

In the 1970s, if no one would have been hurt, burning Bayonne to the ground would have been not an act of sabotage but of civic improvement.

...

A 46-year-old automobile washer from Brownsville pleaded guilty yesterday to possession of policy slips. Frank Smith of 1469 East New York Avenue was arraigned before Magistrate Charles Solomon on a complaint signed by Patrolman Edward Kaye charging that 24 sets of policy slips were found in Smith's apartment, concealed in a book entitled "Jehovah." Smith told the magistrate he had been reading the book, but denied that it was his, claiming that it was in fact left at his home by a woman boarder who had since died. "Do you read the Bible?" questioned the Magistrate. Smith replied that he did. "Did you ever," the Magistrate continued, "ever think of trying to get an inspiration by reading the Book of Numbers?"
...

Hiding policy slips in a bible book is just bad karma. A certain female candy store owner takes note.

...

(There's a reason why Ruby Keeler should always listen to Joan Blondell.)
...

Good one, Lizzie.

And in the Daily News...

With all the frills upon it...
...

"Rosemary Warburton, daughter of Mrs. Willie K. Vanderbilt, was one of the more attractively dressed members of the younger set. Her tiny doily hat of lilies of the valley was matched by the small bunch of artificial lilies of the valley pinned to the shoulder of her black crepe two-piece suit. Over he shoulders was a short black broadtail jacket. "

What? No picture! Isn't this "New York's Picture Newspaper?" Come on, who doesn't want to see that crazy getup?

...

Yeah, I know, but I could really go for some chow mein right now.
...

What could be more 1940s New York City than chow mein at the Automat?

...

Point of order: why go to all the trouble of doing this when you could buy a plain, unmarked, untraceable knife at any dime store? WHY MAKE IT SO COMPLICATED?
...

It shouldn't be long till we see Mrs. Helmet pop up on Page Four being escorted around town by a poor but presentable "Count," at least until Tracy works his way back to her from the people she hired to kill her husband.

...

"Yipe! A woman!" Jeez, Pat, the Navy has changed you.
...

No kidding, that's not Pat the dog we've come to know and love.

Isn't it about time Taffy woke up?

 

[LizzieMaine]

Pictures, you say?

"Hmph," says Sally. "I'll stick to my saddles!"

 

[Fading Fast]

Pictures, you say?

"Hmph," says Sally. "I'll stick to my saddles!"

My apologies to the News, but I still don't see a picture of Rosemary Warburton and all her real and fake lilies of the valley.

IMO, one of the most insane things in the world is women's footwear, but one, try telling that to a woman who loves it and, two, apparently, women are wearing it more for other women than for men.

One of the things that first attracted me to my girlfriend all those years ago was that she didn't wear stupid fashion shoes. I liked the look better and I liked what it said about her.

 

[LizzieMaine]

The pic at lower left, "Which Always Come In Twosies," is the exact shoes I'm wearing today. Not much to look at, but I don't fall down the stairs wearing them.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Hey, ya din' hafteh wait up f'me," says Joe as he pads quietly into the bedroom at quarter to two in the morning. "I couldn' sleep," replies Sally. "I go to Ma's afteh woik t'pick up Leonoreh, an' she's babblin' sum'pn 'bout 'Da fight, Da fight.'" Sally snaps on the light and Joe pulls his cap down over his forehead. "Gawdawmighty, Joe!" she blurts. "Whassat egg on ya head? Don't tell me ya got in a fight, you jus' havin' a concussion! Don' TELL me..." "It wan' nut'n," Joe stammers. "Jus' sump'n stupid onna subway, t'at's awl. Nobody got hoit." Sally glares, and Joe takes a deep breath. "I'm takin' Leonoreh t' ya ma's house, right? An'nis guy gets on at Atlan'ic, t'is saileh. An' he's stan'in nex'tme, givin' me t'look, you know, sizin' me up, an'ne pernts t'Leonoreh an' says 'Daddy's lit'l exemption, huh?', an' he kin'a gives me t'elbow inna ribs an' stawrts snickerin', ya know? An' I try t'ignawr'im, y'know, takin'a high road, an'nen he says 'betcha livin' it up, huh? Makin'a bucks, g'home at night t'ya lit'l wife an' awllat, huh?" Sally's face reddens and her eyes narrow, but she says nothing. "He keeps it up, y'know, wit't lit'l jabs an' Leonoreh's fussin', an' fin'ly I look'im oveh an' say sump'n like, oh, I dunno, sump'n like 'nice suit, Popeye, y'get a pipe wit'it'" An' nen he shoves at me an' Leonoreh stawrts cryin', an'nis lady settin'eah readin' PM looks up an' sez to 'im "AW GET OVEH YASELF," an' befoeh anyt'ing else happens we pull inta Prospec' Pawk, an' we get off, an' we get out onna platfawrm, an' he stawrts in jawrin' at me again, sayin' if t'baby wan'neah, he'd show me a few tricks." "An'nen he HIT ya?" gasps Sally. "Well, no," Joe continues. "He's flappin' his mout', an' jus'ten one'a t'em Leary boys, you know? One'a Uncle Frank's boys, t'one t'ey cawl 't' Neck?' He just shows up utta nowheah, an' says 'awright, saileh, shove off.' An' so he does." Sally blinks with surprise, and taps her forehead. "But what..?" "Well," shrugs Joe, "t'saileh's goin' off an' he yells back at me 'good t'ing ya boyfrien' showed up!' An' I toin t' yell sump'n back...an' I...um...wawk right into a pole." "Ah," nods Sally. "Yeah. Hoits like hell, too. Y'know, t'ough, it's a funny t'ing t'at Neck guy jus' hapn'ta be hangin' 'roun'a station like t'at." Yeah," replies Sally with a slow nod. "Funny t'ing.")

In London, the Polish government in exile may ask Prime MInister Churchill and President Roosevelt to intervene in a diplomatic dispute that has led to the suspension of relations between the Poles and the Soviet Union. General Wladislaw Sikorski. the Polish Premier, conferred today with the Prime Minister and Foreign Secretary Anthony Eden, and while a press conference scheduled for today was cancelled a statement is expected from the British Government tomorrow. Moscow has called for the removal of "anti-Soviet" elements in the Polish government in exile as a condition for the reinstatement of diplomatic relations. The move is interpreted by some as a prod from Moscow for the establishment of a second front, and for the recognition by Britain and the US of postwar Soviet territorial claims.

Not only have Brooklyn and Queens gone over the top in the Second War Loan Drive, but so to has the entire Region Seven of the Second Federal Reserve District, which includes those two boroughs along with Staten Island, Nassau County, and Suffolk County. Combined bond sales for the present campaign total more than $110,000,000 over the area's $146,000,000 quota.

American Jews will observe a six week period of mourning beginning today, in memory of more than two million European Jews exterminated by Hitler. The proclamation of the post-Passover mourning period was issued by the Synagogue Council of America's Intercession Council, and will couple traditional prayers for the dead with pleas for U. S. government agencies to rescue as many of Europe's remaining Jews as possible before it is too late. American Jews are asked to make Monday and Thursday partial fast days, to limit amusement activities, and to make contributions to the United Jewish Appeal. Special prayers will be offered both in synagogues and in homes over the course of the mourning period.

(Jean Litz, The Platinum Blonde Waitress is now accepting selected theatrical bookings. Contact her agent for full particulars.)

A 43-year-old Staten Island waiter was convicted today of first and second degree murder charges in the January 2nd stabbing deaths of his daughter and his sister-in-law. Louis Valle was found guilty on both counts in Nassau County Court, and faces a mandatory death sentence on the first-degree murder conviction. Valle was accused of knifing his 15 year old daughter Florentia Valle and sister-and-law Mrs. Olivia Seelig after an argument over Mrs. Seelig's supervision of Florentina, who was living at her home in New Hyde Park after a dispute with her father. Valle also stabbed Mrs. Seelig's husband Nicholas and their daughter Esther during his rampage, but both recovered from their wounds. Defense attorney Elvin D. Edwards had unsuccessfully argued that Valle was insane at the time of the attacks, but prosecutor Edward J. Neary pointed out that the defendent had had sufficient time before the attacks to deliberate over their commission. Valle will be sentenced on May 5th.

The will of a 74-year-old spinster who left $10,000 to her pet dog will be disputed by her nephew. Mrs. Edith Grinnell Bowdoin of Manhattan left her nephew, George T. Bowdoin a mere $5000 in the will, while bequeathing twice that to her Chow dog, and cash and bonds amounting to $345,000 to her personal physician, Dr. Beekman J. Delatour. Bowdoin filed court papers yesterday demanding an examination of witnesses attesting to the document.

(Yeah, but it, um, *is* propaganda. Any art created to promote or encourage any sort of point of view is propaganda. The word had neither a positive nor a negative connotation until we decided that what *they* do is "propaganda" and what *we* do is "information." But, you see, that differentiation, in itself, is propaganda....)

"A. Henrietta" writes in to Helen Worth to plead for dog owners to be more considerate of their neighbors and to not let their pets roam the neighborhood at will. She notes that she loves dogs and always keeps a dog, but keeps him in the house except when she takes him out on a leash. She does not allow him to roam the neighborhood digging up yards, chasing children, and otherwise wrecking other people's property. "More Practice of the Golden Rule," says Henrietta, "would solve this matter."

(I don't know why they keep Davis around anyway, he's 9000 years old and I'll never not say that Leo blew the World Series by starting him in Game 1 when he had Higbe rested and ready to go. I will never, ever understand that decision. Oh, and no hot dogs in the stands for the duration? WAR IS HELL!)

Silent picture fans, of whom there may still be a few surviving, should tune in on Groucho Marx's program over WABC on May 8th, when his guest star will be the vamp of all screen vamps, Miss Theda Bara.

(LOOK OUT PATTI! It's not Adolphe Menjou at all -- it's Warren William!)

(Well, this is certainly well-planned.)

("I can't wait to get out of this damn --gasp -- corset!")

(TAKE SALMON OUT OF SEASON? NOT AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE HERO -- gulp!)

(What's that worth, three blue points? Phooey, you should've grabbed for the Spam.)