The Era -- Day By Day

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

Ellsworth Wisecarver 14, claims ''Elaine (21 with two children) is my first love.''
-this just cannot be made up.
And our cockney lass with four newly born quads to a married GI on his divorce issue.
She asks Bill's Irish Catholic wife for her divorce consent so ''to give us a chance.''
All pre-invasion. ''Bill may never go back to the United States.'' Righto pipin, Bill may take up permanent European residence in military cemetery honoured rest.
--just cannot be made up.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("T' Kentucky Doiby," sneers Sally. "Hawrse racin' is stupid. Awlem boobs t'rowin'eh money away, an'nezza wawr on. I ask ya!" "Terrible," nods Alice. "I'm glad Siddy don' go inf'non'a t'at. He useta, but we hadda tawk one night an' he come aroun'ta my way a t'inkin'." "S'funny," muses Sally. "When I dropped off Leonoreh at t'stoeh t'is mawrnin', t'eh was awlese charactehs runnin' in an' out, handin' stuff t' Ma, t'at Hops Gaffney was runnin' awlaroun' writin' stuff down, an' goin' in an' outta t' back room t'eh. Butcha know, none'v'm seemta be buyin' nut'n. I dunno how she can make a livin', awlem freeloadehs 'n bums hangin' aroun'." "Yeh," nods Alice, suppressing an eyeroll. "Anya know what else?" continues Sally. "T'eh was awlese people goin' in an' outta t'at back room t'eh. Y'know, when I was lit'l, Ma neveh let me go inneh. Said she didn' wan' me gett'n inta t'ings, makin' a mess, gett'n in trouble. Butcha know what I done? One time when I was, I dunno, 'leven awr twelve, I peeked inna keyhole when she wasn' lookin', an' I see Uncle Frank inneh sitt'n 'rouna big table wit' a buncha ot'eh guys. But Ma catches me, yanks on my haieh an' tells me t'keep my nose outta t'ings t'at ain' my business. Sez t'me, it's t' Eas' Flatbush Businessmen's Political Association an'neh havin' a cawnfr'ence. An' I says, 'funny kinda confrence, looked t'me like t'ey was playin' cawrds.' An' she says 'no, t'eh jus' goin' oveh business reckids.' An' I says 'well how come Uncle Frank gotta business reckid stuck inna cuff of his pants?' An'nat's when she smacked me." "Businessmen got t'eh own met'ods of account'n," sighs Alice. "You ain't kidd'n," nods Sally, rubbing her cheek in memory of the lesson.)

The New York City Federation of Women's Clubs today joined the opposition to the proposed opening of a hostel on Clinton Street for Japanese-American workers relocated to Brooklyn from evacuation camps in the west. Meeting for its 124th Annual Convention at the Astor Hotel yesterday, the organization voted a unanimous resolution condemning the plan, denouncing the housing of the evacuees in an area adjacent to the waterfront. Other resolutions voted by the conference denounced the Government takeover of Montgomery Ward & Company and the unseating of its chairman Sewell Avery, and expressed opposition to Mayor LaGuardia's proposal for "socialized medicine" in New York City.

(Cheer up, kid -- YOU know she's the best dog.)

Administration leaders in the House today expressed belief that an impartial investigation will uphold the decision to seize Montgomery Ward & Company. By an overwhelming vote of 300 to 60 the House yesterday voted to authorize a formal investigation of the broad issues relating to the seizure, following last week's vote by the Senate authorizing a similar probe by the Senate Judicial Committee.

("Have you, madam, considered goldfish?")

(Here's hoping.)

(Hey Leo, maybe the Bushwicks can spare a few infielders. And once again, how bout those Major League Leading St. Louis Browns?)

Latest member of the Dodger youth brigade is 19-year-old pitcher Calvin Coolidge McLish. Asked if he was a Republican or a Democrat, the hurler made like his silent namesake and shrugged "I don't know."

Leo Durocher has paid his $100 fine for folding his arms at umpre Tom Dunn at the Polo Grounds last Sunday. Lippy was so furious about the fine that he threatened league president Ford Frick that he would pay it in pennies. But after further discussion, Leo agreed to write a check, putting an end, for the moment, to the issue.

(Oh yeah? Well, hon, get wise to yourself. Ankles don't stay slim forever.)

(Oh, Mrs. Dardnanella. Hanging around jails, are we?)

(Yeah, Jane, that's why you aren't the theatre critic.)

(He knows "IT's" value. So does Elinor Glyn.)

(AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE HERO DOG never knowingly violates the Code of the Canines.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"The kind every girl wants to have."

"Well, at least they've stopped bothering ME." -- G. R. Lee.

Station B-U-R-M-A is on the air!

You know what, Wilmer? France is nice this time of year.

Lil's ma orchestrated the whole thing.

Slow news day.

And you call yourself a Junior Commando.

"Hey, beats raking blueberries."

Drowned -- 1-1. Hypothermia -- 20-1 . Eaten by seals -- 100-1.

And that's why you should always hold onto the railing.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Oh and,

You're not fooling anybody, Roy. We know you really listen to Skelton.

 

[Fading Fast]

I read "Lady Chatterly's Lover" in college and remember the "obscene" parts were the boring parts with very stilted writing. But that was three-plus decades ago.

"dates"

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

Wisecarver is toppers again today but Sgt Mulligan gets served warrant after his marriage
during the reception for fathering another woman's child. A para, of course.

Lady Chatterley's ban by the New York Suppression of Vice.
-you just cannot make this stuff up-

 

[LizzieMaine]

("They're very impressed with Leonora at the clinic," observes Dr. Minkoff, looking over a typed report. "T'ey oughta be," declares Sally. "She's whatchacawl impressive." "Yes," nods Dr. Minkoff. "They also mention here that she's a very assertive child. She seems to decide right away what she wants to do, and if an attempt is made to lead her in another direction, she seems to actively resist. Have you observed that with her?" "Nah," replies Sally. "Well, 'cept wit'teh cousin Willie. An' maybe Ma sometimes. An' Joe said sump'n about it oncea'twice. An'nem people at't'at noissery t'eh out t' Weste'n Electric. But me, I mean, ain'nat how ya WANT a kid t'be? Ma useta say t'at's how *I* was, she'd say 'I don'wan'cha stan'in'onna corneh handin' out t'em Sacco an' Vanzetti papehs. People gonna tawk.' But I kept right awn wit'it 'til she sent Uncle Frank down t'get me. He comedown'eh, an' I kicked 'im inna shin, so 'e lef' me alone afteh t'at. Ma come down 'ehself, nex' time, an' she come at me fr'm b'hind, so I, you know, couldn' get in a good kick." "Ah," replies Dr. Minkoff. "Your mother. You know, it might help me understand the -- ah -- dynamics of your family if you'd -- well, how do you and your mother get along? I mean she seems -- ah -- from what you've told me, of course -- that she has a rather strong personality herself." "Eh," ehs Sally. "Ma didn't tawk t'me much growin' up, 'cepta tell me what she didn' wawnt me t'do. Don' go inna back room, don' run aroun'a streets, don' tawk t'no cawps, don' go out wit' boys, don' speak lessya spoken to, you know, awlat stuff. Some times I'd mind 'eh, sometimes I didn', you know, like any kid." "How about your father," continues Dr. Minkoff. "What was he like?" "He smelled," recalls Sally. "T'at's awl I remembeh 'bout 'im, I mean, I ain' seen'im since I was foeh yeehs ol'. He'd come home at night an'nee smelled. Not a good smell, not like Joe useta smell when he'd come home fr'm t' pickle woiks, I liked t'at smell. Moehr'va doity medicine smell, y'know? I didn'wawn'im t'pick me up, so I'd, y'know, I'd holleh an' kick. I t'ink I mighta bit 'im a coupla times inneh too." "Ah," nods Dr. Minkoff. "It does say here on the report that, on her first day at the clinic, another child tried to take away the book Leonora was looking at and she kicked him." "Huh," chuckles Sally. "Guess he won' try t'at again, huh?" "Ah," replies Dr. Minkoff, scrawling furiously in his notebook.)

Speedy Senate passage of the House-approved tax simplification bill was predicted today by Chairman Walter F. George (D-Georgia) of the Senate Finance Committee. Barring lengthy testimony by church and charitable organizations who oppose the bill on the grounds that an automatic 10 percent deduction on all income up to $5000 per year may reduce donations, Sen. George anticipated that nothing but the regular committee examination is likely to delay the bill. The measure was passed 358 to 0 yesterday in the House. George noted that the practical effect of the bill is that it will release an estimated 30,000,000 taxpayers from the obligation of filing a return. He did acknowledge that single persons and families without dependents may be hit somewhat harder under the plan.

Draft quotas for the next four months can be filled entirely by tapping available men under the age of 26. Selective Service director Gen. Lewis B. Hershey noted yesterday that there are at present approximately 1,700,000 men under the age of 26 still available for the draft, and suggested that it is unlikely any large number of men over the age of 26 will be required to meet military manpower requirements during 1944.

Mohandas K. Gandhi flashed a toothless grin today as he was released from 21 months political imprisonment at the Aga Khan's palace in Koona. The Indian nationalist leader was said to be suffering from physical and mental exhaustion as he left the palace shortly after 8 am, and was taken to the home of his friend Lady Pramilly Thackersy. It was understood that Gandhi, whose release was ordered by British authorities due to his health, will be returned to his followers in Bombay on Monday.

("Two of the less profitable franchises will be shipped to the West Coast." Well, as long as you leave the profitable ones alone.)

("Glamour boy?" Well now, I wouldn't say that.)

Etta Moten, church singer turned blues star, will sing the role of Bess when George Gershwin's famous folk opera "Porgy and Bess" opens on Tuesday at the Flatbush Theatre. Miss Moten, whose voice ranges from a deep alto all the way down into the realms of the baritone, studied classical singing at Western University in Kansas, under D. M. Swarthout, a cousin of opera star Gladys Swarthout. She was the choice of Gershwin himself when the original run of the opera was being cast, but was unavailable for the role due to other committments, but she has since made the role famous in productions from coast to coast.

(One...two...three....BOOM!)

(But Elmer NEVER wins!!!)

(Yeah, but those were electoral college votes. Big deal.)

("Haven't changed much, have they?" HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?)

(Ain't science wonderful?)

(And Gen. Knudson wonders why he never gets invited to any parties.)

(Later this year, we will see the debut of a real magazine called "Pageant," a downmarket version of the Reader's Digest, clearly founded by a reader of "Mary Worth.")

 

[LizzieMaine]

And also...

("Naked as a peeled wand.")

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

The peeled wands look different on the West Coast.

Coming events....

Careful now, don't get raided!

Bismuth cures indigestion but it causes constipation -- which under the circumstances, I guess, is something for which he should be thankful.

Shadow needs to start reading Elizabeth Hawes.

Hmph, Davega Punjab. GIVE US THE REAL THING! And jeez, Mosely --- if you need to use four panels just to catch us up on all the plots, maybe you need to simplify a bit.

Who says the comics aren't educational? And gee Mr. Ladd, is it true you film most of your love scenes standing on a box?

Yeah, those floating decimals will get you every time.

SANDY??? IS THAT YOU??? WHATEVER HAPPENED TO YOUR EXCLUSIVE CONTRACT?

That poor little dancer...

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

James Stewart was a real hero. Capable, courage, taciturn modesty.

Now Burms and Terrence are set along a rendezvous with destiny. More and more I equate these two with an American western like Wanted Dead or Alive. Not Big Valley or Cheyenne.
Wagon Train. That's it! They never arrive but just keep Wagon Training.

 

[PrivateEye]

Tuesday is always a let down for breaking up the storylines in the comics.

Thank god for TATP.

 

[LizzieMaine]

The difficult thing with Sunday continuity comics is that, because the Sunday color sections are printed weeks ahead of the rest of the paper, the strips have to be drawn several weeks ahead of the daily strips -- so to continue the storyline thru Sunday, the artist has to figure out the storyline well ahead. As we saw last year when the syndicate kiboshed the ration-board plot in "Annie", this makes it very difficult to change anything once you've set the story in motion, so most artists prefer to play it safe and do one-and-done gags on Sunday, like Gasoline Alley or Harold Teen, or run entirely separate storylines, like "Scarlet O'Neill" and "The Gumps." That Caniff's Sunday strips don't read like they were written six weeks ahead of the rest of the story is testimony to his skill.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

Ms Elizabeth your comic/newsprint/Era tutorials are always appreciated.

Gloria Grahame, screen goddess sweater femme fatale who bedded her fourteen-year old
stepson is the perfect model for Burma. Movie Stars Don't Die in Liverpool with Annette Bening
is ''the flick to read.'' FLASH---Ms Bening could also do a more than adequate Burms,
now that I mention it. I'm thinking The Grifters.
Mr Caniff does seem ahead of the curve still there needs be more please and less tease.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Whatcha writin'?" queries Alice. ""S'if I didn't know." "Yeh," nods Sally. "Letteh t'Joe. I wanna ask'im what'e t'inksa some'a t'is stuff Docteh Minkoff was askin' about yest'day. He spent haff'n'oueh askin' aw'kin's'a questions about Ma. Did me'n Ma gettalawng, did I t'ink it was a good en'vir'am'nt t'leave Leonoreh at t'stoeh, awlkin's'a stuff like t'at. Real snoopy stuff, y'know." "Ahh," exhales Alice. "What'c'ha tell'im?" "What should I tell'im?" shrugs Sally. "She's my ma, f'r'better'a f'woist. Maybe I do t'ink she wasted 'eh life sellin' egg creams t'joiks an' bums..." "I like 'eh egg creams," protests Alice. "An' you know Joe loves'm. We ain' joiks 'n bums." "Oh, you know what I mean," retorts Sally. "Awlem charactehs hangin' aroun'neh awla time, t'at Hops Gaffney an'nat bunch. I awrways hated t'at Ma hadta put up wit'tat. She's a smawrt woman, y'know. She c'n do math inneh head like you wouldn' b'lieve. I seen'eh do it when she was figyehrin' t'books t'eh. Neveh needs pencil'n papeh, jus' rolls 'eh eyes up'n'a back'v'eh head t'eh, an' rattles it awff like she's Joel Kuppehman. An' what's she doin'? Sellin' egg creams t' joiks an' bums. It's like when I was woikin' at Woolwoit's. Woikin'at lunch counteh. Sellin' cheese san'wiches t'ol' ladies. Boeh'd t' deat', but t'at was t'on'y jawb t'ey'd gimme." Sally sighs. "When'ney moved me t'yawrd goods an' cawled it a promotion, but didn't gimme no moeh money...well, I do'wan'nat f'Leonoreh, y'know? T'at's what I tol' Minkoff. "I wawn' Leonoreh t'be somebody, y'know? An'nat Minkoff jus' sits'eh, writin' down innis notebook." "Y'really t'inkya Ma's good at math?" interrupts Alice. "Yeh," nods Sally. "She's like a p'fesseh." "Well'en," huffs Alice. "Howcome t'las' time I was inneh, she shawrt changed me?" "Maybe YOU ain' good at math," suggests Sally. "I know," grumbles Alice, "when t'ings don't add up.")

The Montgomery Ward case, which may become an issue in the upcoming election, neared the showdown stage today, with at least two major developments scheduled for this week. The first is the collective bargaining election among Ward's Chicago employees tomorrow, with some 6000 non-supervisory workers casting ballots on union representation in a special vote supervised by the National Labor Relations Board, and the second is the opening of a formal investigation of the military seizure of the Ward plant, and the ouster of Ward Board Chairman Sewell Avery, who was bodily removed from his office by two soldiers after he refused to leave under his own power. The investigation will follow a ruling this morning by Federal Judge William H. Holly on the government's petition for a temporary injunction prevening the company from interfering with operation of the plant by the Department of Commerce.

A report today from Tokyo by the Japanese Domei News Agency stated that the Japanese Government "has responded" to a protest made by the United States Government on February 5th concerning the treatment of prisoners of war and American civilian internees. The response broadcast over the Japanese radio to North America referred to "errors and misunderstandings" by the United States on the matter, and criticized the "unjust treatment by American authorites" of Japanese nationals in the United States.

("Mayor LaGuardia is on the air! Presented each week at this time by the American Artichoke Board...")

(All right, you sissies -- drop the toothbrush!)

The Eagle Editorialist stands in the "middle of the road" right alongside Parks Commissioner Robert Moses in endorsing his recent comments on postwar projects for Brooklyn. "The school that believes a utopia lies ahead if the Government will just keep its hands off everything isn't too pleased with Mr. Moses' sometimes cavalier attitude toward the status quo," the EE observes. "And because Mr. Moses doesn't want to burn down the house before remodeling the staircase, the proponents of immediate, drastic, and complete overturn snipe at him for being too conservative."

(Oh, they'll get to you eventually -- unless you happen to play for the Cardinals.)

("He reminded me of Wyatt out there." Whistling In Brooklyn. Oh, and I'm sure Casey Stengel will enjoy himself very much in Milwaukee, managing a franchise co-owned by Bill Veeck.)

(Yeah, yeah, enough with the floating heads. Get on with the plot.)

("WELL NOW, COULD THIS BE HUSBAND NUMBER -- oh pooh, I've lost track again!")

("I know, let's talk to that lawyer!" SEE WHAT'D I TELL YA!)

("Sorry, too big to fit in the overhead compartment.")

(YOUR EXISTENCE BOTHERS ME!)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"Writin' 'em on ye THIGH!" hmph Ma. "AMATCHOOR! Keep'm in ye HEAD!"

"Overexposed? That's nothing new for us!"

Don't get distracted now.

"But it clashed with the decor!"

It's just as well, the book was written by Doc Brady.

Some of the things I think about when I think I'm asleep WOULD make a pretty good movie script...

1944: A snake eating its own tail.

You can't go home again.

"Um...this is important. Did he bring a rug?"

Hell hath no fury like an actor scorned.

 

[Fading Fast]

Tuesday is always a let down for breaking up the storylines in the comics.

Thank god for TATP.

The difficult thing with Sunday continuity comics is that, because the Sunday color sections are printed weeks ahead of the rest of the paper, the strips have to be drawn several weeks ahead of the daily strips -- so to continue the storyline thru Sunday, the artist has to figure out the storyline well ahead. As we saw last year when the syndicate kiboshed the ration-board plot in "Annie", this makes it very difficult to change anything once you've set the story in motion, so most artists prefer to play it safe and do one-and-done gags on Sunday, like Gasoline Alley or Harold Teen, or run entirely separate storylines, like "Scarlet O'Neill" and "The Gumps." That Caniff's Sunday strips don't read like they were written six weeks ahead of the rest of the story is testimony to his skill.

And here we have an example (remember, our 2024 Wednesday is 1944's Monday) of obvious exposition as Allen Saunders basically tells his weekly readers what happened yesterday in case they don't get the Sunday paper.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

It's all falling in place for Terrence. And he looks so Steverino McQueen super cool calm & collected wearing his Aero A2 horsehide jacket with AVG crest and leather name strip.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("LaGuardia gonna be sponsehed by a poifume com'pny?" snickers Sally. "Well, he *is* t' Lit'l Floweh. An'lookeh't'is. Sinatra's got a t'roat infection. Maybe Butch c'n take oveh his show too!" "Pooeh Frankie," sighs Alice. "I hope 'ees awright." "You an' ya Frankie," scoffs Sally. "He AWRWAYS soun's like 'ee's got a t'roat infection. 'Sunnnnday. Monnnnday. 'r aaaaaaawlways....' T'at ain' no kinda singin'. He ain'no Vallee, t'at's f'sueh." "Get hep t't'times, kid," snickers Alice. "Y'toinin' into an ickie in ya ol' age." "Hmph," hmphs Sally, scowling at the very thought. There is a long silence. "I ain' t'at old," she finally growls. "Reeeemembeh t'naaaaaame," sings Alice, "of Lydia Pinnnnnkham..." "Y'know," Sally frowns, "when y'wanneh, y'c'n be really brutal.")

Long-range Army and Navy Liberators were revealed today to have made their second land-based attack on Guam, former American naval base in the Arianas, as the Allies carried out further aerial blows against the Japanese from the Kuriles to the Carolinas and the Marshalls. The bombers, in raiding Guam, ran into a swarm of approximately 25 enemy fighters, but shot down seven and probably destroyed two more, all with out loss to the American force. The Japanese defenders put up only moderate anti-aircraft fire as bombers from the 7th Army Air Force and Fleet Airwing Two hit the island.

Authorities began a nationwide manhunt today for one Soylo Villegas, also known as Solya Villyvoz, whom they believe to be the "John Lopez" who shipped a trunk containing the semi-nude, salt-packed body of Louise Chestine Wright of Myrtle, Mississippi from Chicago to Los Angeles last week. Director J. Edgar Hoover of the Federal Bureau of Investigation announced last night that the body had been identified by fingerprints, and that she was also known as Louise C. Myers. Chicago police stated that the description of the body matched that of a woman who registered at the Racine Hotel in that city with Villegas as his wife. Director Hoover stated that Miss Wright had a police record of three arrests in the states of Arkansas, Louisiana, and Tennessee, one of them on vagrancy charges and the others "for investigation." Her body was discovered when railway shipping clerks noticed brine seeping from the trunk.

(Well then, something to look forward to.)

("Uh, Mr. Zanuck, sir, sorry to bother you, but we can't come up with a title for this new Betty Grable picture...")

(Coming Events Cast Their Shadows Before...)

("Sheer desperation." That's one way to put it. And Rickey sees something of Nap Lajoie in the way Olmo plays second base? Hey, why not sign Lajoie himself, he's only 69.)

(Do you get the sense that Mr. Saunders is taking something out on someone?)

(Ah, prison welfare work. Well, it's better than hanging around the Navy Yard.)

(AND IF YOU DO GO OUT, DRESS INCONSPICUOUS.)

(You know, respectable people wear plaid suits too.)

(AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE HERO DOG always was a poor judge of character.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"Oh, and what happened to Annie and that guy from the ration board?"

(There's A New World Coming...)

"I said I was a FINE hit man, not a SMART one!"

"Now, son, do you finally want me to do something about that cowlick or not?"

Well, you're no prize package yourself.

If that's supposed to be Mrs. Clark, somebody's in a lot of trouble.

Oh well, that's show biz.

Don't get ahead of yourself.

KEEP CRANKING

"It'll save time. I tee off at two."

 

[Fading Fast]

(Do you get the sense that Mr. Saunders is taking something out on someone?)

Yes, and brutally so.

KEEP CRANKING

Come on Burma, this is not the first time you've "twisted" when you were tired and didn't feel like doing it.