The Era -- Day By Day

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

Burms is caught in Caniff artistic entrapment whereby drama builds. Quite so.
How-so-ever I am anticipating a real get to gather lather later with our lad and lass, not a simple peck on cheek nice seeing you again moment.

Criminal forensics sure took a dive with the lady slain Los Angeles then salt packed shipped Chicago; or was it Chicago-LA? I am always impressed by the overall news tone heard this Era and its journalism. Today, far too much frivilous nature is norm.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("You done wit'tat papeh?" queries Alice. "C'n I see it?" "Yeh," nods Sally, having finished with the afternoon's Eagle and absorbed now in a magazine. "Whassat?" inquires Alice. "Glammeh Magazine? You ain' goin' Hawllywood, awr ya?" "Neh," replies Sally without looking up. "T'ez'n awrticle in heeh 'bout basebawl." "Huh," huhs Alice. "Who wrote it, Hilda Chesteh?" "Neh," nehs Sally. "It's by Red Bawrbeh." "He's pretty glammehrous," nods Alice. "I seen'im aroun'. I like redheads, a'couese, bein' as I'm one meself. Didja know Siddy useta be a redhead? Um, befoeh -- you know." "Says heeh," continues Sally, "t'at moeh women is gett'n innehrested in basebawl. Huh. Like t'at's news. I mean, I been innehrested in basebawl since I was a lit'l goil. Growin' up six blocks f'm Ebbets Feel, I mean, why wouldn' I be. I useta know a bunchat'em playehs t'en, I eveh tellya? Dazzy Vance useta come inna stoeh awla time, y'know, backina twennies t'eh. Boily Grimes useta come in. Ivy Olson. Even ol' Uncle Robbie, Ma really liked him, said he was "joosta big bootarbaaahl.'"" "Heh," hehs Alice. "T'at's pretty good t'eh, you soun'ed jus' like 'eh." "T'ese guy's'd come in, I'd be sittin' att'a counteh t'eh doin' my homewoik, an'ney'd say 'what's t'woid, kiddo?' an'ney'd go inneh t't' back room. An'ney'd come out carryin', y'know, a littl' papeh bag. Ma said she done a real good business in carry-home ice cream wit'tem guys." "I bet," eyerolls Alice. "T'is awrticle, t'ough," returns Sally. "Says heeh t'is Miss's Payne Whitney, y'know, she was married t'one'a t'em Wawl Street charachtehs, right? An' she had t'is race hawrse. An' she named it 'Shut Out.' An' y'know why? B'cause one day she was list'nin' t'Red Bawrbeh onna radio an' Whit Wyatt pitched a shutout. So she says, hey, I'm gonna cawl'is hawrse 'Shut Out." "Wyatt t'rew a shut out?" marvels Alice. "Mustabenna lawng time ago." "Yeh," snorts Sally.)

American troops in their successful invasion of Dutch New Guinea killed at least 31 Japanese for every doughboy lost during the first 17 days of the operation, a communique revealed today. The report from the headquarters of General Douglas MacArthur stated that 871 Japanese were killed and 193 captured in the invasion, which is considered a major step in the Allied road back to the Philippines. American casualties for the same period were listed as 28 killed and 95 wounded.

(Ew.)

Three American-born Japanese sisters have been indicted on treason charges by a Federal grand jury in Denver, Colorado for aiding an escape attempt by German prisoners of war. Thirty-three year old Florence Shivzo Otani, 34-year-old Tauruko Wallace, and 31-year-old Shitara Tanigoshi, will be arraigned today before U. S. Commissioner Harold S. Oakes. The sisters are charged with aiding two German POWs in escaping from a prison camp near Trinidad, Colorado last year. The two Germans were re-captured at Watrous, New Mexico last October 15th. The Grand Jury took up the case after photographs were published in the Denver Post showing the three women engaging in "amorous poses" with the escaped prisoners. It was alleged that the snapshots were taken while the sisters were driving the two escapees to Wagon Mound, New Mexico, and it was further alleged that the women provided the escaped prisoners with maps, food, clothing, and money in order to facilitate their escape.

("Well you just can't GET a real gun! DON'CHA KNOW THERE"S A WAR ON??")

(Yeh, pally, you just go right on thinking that.)

("Brooklyn Tigers?" Meh. I agree with Mr. Holmes, Dodgers is a perfect name for a football team. And -- "Boston Yankees????" Isn't that like "The Roman Greeks?")

("The Pit Mouth?" He's no H. P. Lovecraft.)

("I know the mayor so well." I bet you do.)

(Good luck on Sands Street, kid.)

(You really should've bought a seat for it.)

(Well what would YOU do?)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

I mean, at this point, who HASN'T punched out Pat DiCicco?

"IDIOTIC? I HAVE HIS ASHTRAY RIGHT HERE!"

"ooh! ow! cold water!"

"Wait, you're not Veronica Lake. Oh, close enough."

"I can't believe he's got them working on the second shift!"

An honest cop? What town is this again?

Nice fellow to have around.

Well, at least he left you lunch.

"My girl friend." Wait, April Kane is here too?

"Hey, isn't an obstetrician licensed to perform marriages?"

 

[Fading Fast]

"Three American-born Japanese sisters have been indicted on treason charges by a Federal grand jury in Denver, Colorado for aiding an escape attempt by German prisoners of war. Thirty-three year old Florence Shivzo Otani, 34-year-old Tauruko Wallace, and 31-year-old Shitara Tanigoshi, will be arraigned today before U. S. Commissioner Harold S. Oakes. The sisters are charged with aiding two German POWs in escaping from a prison camp near Trinidad, Colorado last year. The two Germans were re-captured at Watrous, New Mexico last October 15th. The Grand Jury took up the case after photographs were published in the Denver Post showing the three women engaging in "amorous poses" with the escaped prisoners. It was alleged that the snapshots were taken while the sisters were driving the two escapees to Wagon Mound, New Mexico, and it was further alleged that the women provided the escaped prisoners with maps, food, clothing, and money in order to facilitate their escape."

Of course you can't judge an entire group on the actions of a few individuals, but in 1944, this is not going to help inspire support for the Japanese hostel in Brooklyn.

"My girl friend." Wait, April Kane is here too?

"Well, I never actually told April we were exclusive."

Terry really is growing up.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

A possessive pronoun spells it all. Not that we needed any clues here but looking at this
adversarial chess match betwixt our lad and Ms Cherry Bomb Wicked Witch of the East-
post race replay analysis with her break out gate come hither slither-Terrence should have seised rein and fast galloped her direction. Planted the flag for king and country. Cherry isn't
bad either. A middle aged voluptuous dame acting hot-to-trot needs, well, laddie should 'ave
properly saddled the mare's dare.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Y'know, if I wasn' married an' didn' have t'is jawb I got," muses Alice, "I t'ink I might jern t' WACs. I'd be good at it. I was awrways good at tellin' people what t'do. When me'n Mickey was drivin'at truck f' y'Uncle Frank, why, Mickey done evry'ting I tol' 'im, mosta t't'time." "Yeh," nods Sally without looking up from her copy of "Glamour." "T'ey gott'n awrticle 'bout t'WACs in heeh too," she observes. "Guess t'eh gett'n pretty despr'ate. If I didn't have Leonoreh t'tale caeh'ra, I'd t'ink about it too. Maybe me'n Joe c'd be stationed t'getteh, t'at'd be nice..." "Oh," ohs Alice, reading on. "Says heeh y'gotta have two yeehs'a high school. T'at lets me out, I run off f'm t'sistehs when I was twelve. Neveh got inta no high school." "Y'c'd go t'night school," suggests Sally. "Joe was doin'at befoeh t'wawr. Go oveh t' New Utrick an' sign up. It ain' a bad school. It ain' onna level of Erasmus, 'a coese, but not a bad school." "At my age, go backta school?" wonders Alice. "Wit' allem bobby soxehs?" "Why not," chuckles Sally. "You like Sinatreh." "Hmm," hmms Alice, considering the possibility...)

Japanese torture of Chinese prisoners was revealed today by the liberation of 707 Allied prisoners during the U. S. invasion of Hollandia. A communique from the headquarters of General Douglas MacArthur disclosed that among those prisoners were 487 Sikhs captured at the fall of Singapore, along with 150 other prisoners including American missionaries, Australians, Dutch, Filipinos, Poles, and Czechoslovaks. In addition, eighty-six Javanese were freed at Ataipe. One of the freed Sikhs described seeing Chinese civilians who had aided Austrailan guerillas nailed to palm trees along the road between Singapore and Kuala Lampur, with spikes driven thru their foreheads.

The Government is poised today for a new showdown with Montgomery Ward & Company, but this time in a dispute in which there can apparently be no challenge to the President's authority to seize the plant involved. The War Labor Board voted yesterday to request that the President intervene in an ongoing dispute between the Hummer Manufacturing Company, a Springfield, Illinois subsidiary of Montgomery Ward, and the International Longshoremen's Union CIO. The dispute stems from Hummer's refusal to comply with a WLB order covering union security and arbitration procedures, on the claim that the order overreaches the board's authority. A similar argument led to the seizure by the Government of Wards' Chicago offices, which were returned to company control on Tuesday after two weeks of Government operation.

(At Lou's Bar and Grill in Bensonhurst, Flannery the Cop steps inside, and notices an unfamiliar face behind the bar. "Wheh's NIck?" he inquires. The bartender gestures to a copy of the Eagle on the bar. Flannery scans the page, his eyes widen, and he hastens from the establishment.)

(Put whatever you want in it, it's still slum.)

The failure of the supposed "decent Germans" to rise up and overthrow Hitler as the invasion of Western Europe looms convinces the Eagle Editorialist that "Germany has been thoroghly Hitlerized," and that "this fatalism will serve to make more desperate the resistance to invasion when it comes." The EE also warns that the Allies, when victory comes, must not fall into the trap of believing that the German people were "the innocent dupes of Hitler," but were in fact "partners in his guilt, as dangerous collectively as he was individually."

(How do you think he succeeded?)

Members of the New York Classical Club write in to protest the suggestion of the chairman of the Board of Education that courses in foreign languages and higher mathematics could be eliminated from the high school curriculum "in order to make room for courses in tolerance." "We know of no evidence," the letter states, "that students of foreign languages and higher mathematics desecrate religious edifices or break school windows and street lights."

(Ah, Pepper Martin, renowned as the only man ever to regularly play third base without wearing any sort of undergarments. "Wild Hoss" indeed. And the Durochers are talking reconciliation? Leo must be short of cash.)

Pete Reiser and Rex Barney, both stationed at Fort Riley, Kansas, were in St. Louis yesterday as breakfast guests of Leo Durocher, and afterward suited up at Sportsman's Park for a quick workout with the rest of the Dodgers. Pete hit a few sharp ones up the middle, suggesting that a diet of Army pitching hasn't hurt his batting eye. Also visiting was Dixie Walker's brother Harry, Cardinal outfielder who is also stationed at Fort Riley.

("Well, I'll be a libelous noun.")

(Actually, I'd gladly watch a mystery-comedy RKO B-Movie series starring these three.)

(Try the Old Reliable, I hear there's a lot of action there.)

(Wiser? Meh, I don't see it.)

(Kitty is always ready to STICK IT TO THE MAN.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"What??? But I'm RICH!"

Brooklyn: A lotta nerve William Goldberg has. I made that joke two days ago. SALLY PETRAUSKAS.

When he takes off his raincoat, you know it's going down.

You could get married, I mean, what else is there to do.

"Your mind is a SAFE -- the door blown open --" Seriously, pal, ramp it down a bit...

"Plus the Duco fumes settle them right down!"

Just like last time, she's gonna blow the whole place up.

"Love ya and leave ya!"

Hey, you were married to Bumley, so your definition of "handsome" is somewhat suspect.

WELL THE POOR THING WAS ITCHY!

 

[Fading Fast]

Please have Alice go to night school; I see so many funny scenarios arising from that. It could be the final straw that makes Sally snap.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

The abandoned baby given two school girls to momentarily hold is beyond disgust but might
hide extenuating cause so until the whole story is told there it rests. A story read ruins the rest
of the afternoon quite.

Stories of Japanese crucifixion practice also chill the blood yet the above tale runs ice water
to flood hearts and minds more so.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Y'know, Rosebud," begins Alice, addressing Krause's shoes, protruding as they are from under the sink in their basement kitchen. "I been t'inkin'." "Yeh," replies Krause, as a gob of red hair extracted from the drain trap flips out from under the sink and lands neatly in a nearby pail. "Um," inserts Alice, "sawry 'bout t'at, I been wawshin' me haieh inna sink t'eh, I won' do t'at no moeh." "Yeh," returns the voice of her husband. "Anyways, I was sayin,'" Alice resumes, "I been doin' some t'inkin', y'know, about meself, an' well -- I get t'eh feelin' t'ehs -- I dunno, whatcha might cawl, room f'improvement." "Neh," replies the under-sink voice without hesitation, slightly raised over the sound of a scraping pipe wrench. "Well," continues Alice, "heeh me out. See, I ain' very whatchacawl edjehcated. Yeh. I know it's hawrd t'b'lieve, but I neveh had awlat much schoolin' befoeh I run away fr'm t'sistehs t'eh, ev'ryt'ing I know I hadda loin t'hawrd way. An'nit ain' been easy, I mean, I guess t'at's why t'ey cawlit t'hawrd way, right? An' -- well, you know Sal, she's me bes' frien', um, 'cep f'you, of cawrse, but sometimes I feel like she t'inks I 'm -- well, dumb, y'know? Her goin' t'Erasmus an'awl, bein' a high school graduate 'nawllat, sometimes she gets goin' on sump'n, an' she looks oveh'rat me like she don' t'ink I know what she's tawkin'about. 'N sometimes, well, I don't, 'n I feel bad about t'at. So I was t'inkin' maybe I oughta do sump'nabout'tat, OK? I was t'inkin' maybe I might go oveh heeh t' New Utrick some night afteh woik an' have a tawk wit' somebody oveh t'eh about jernin' t' night school, maybe loin some 'rit'matic an' geography an' histr'y 'nawlat. Maybe even some English, y'know, brush up me read'n. I been t'inkin' I need t'be doin' moeh read'n, y'know, 'sides t'papeh an'nem True Story love books n'awl. Sal reads awl kin'sa books 'n awrticles 'bout politics an' what's gonna b'come a' women afteh t'wawr, 'n I t'ink I oughta get in on some'a t'at. 'N you'n me could have, y'know, convehsations 'bout innehrestin' stuff, maybe ev'n have people oveh. Sal, an'na Ginsboigs, maybe ev'n Mrs. Nucci. We could sit aroun' an drink cawfee an' tawk about t'wawr an' stuff t'at's goin' awn inna woil', an' have, y'know, s'm real convehsations. I mean, I know how much you like t'tawk, so whatcha t'ink? Y't'ink I oughta go?" Another clump of hair flips into the pail, as Krause replies "Yeh.")

American planes from the central and south Pacific joined in a three-day sweep of the Caroline Islands centering the attacks on a double raid on the Japanese base at Truk, it was disclosed today. The new blows on the strategic island came as Australian ground forces advanced along the New Guinea coast to near Cape Croisilles, 16 miles north of Alexishaven, as US servicemen mopped up scattered Japanese remnants in the Admiralty Islands. A spokesman for the headquarters of General Douglas MacArthur said that 3202 Japanese were killed in the Admiralties thru May 9th, and only 169 were taken prisoner since the American landings on February 29th. He estimated that only "a few hundred" Japanese remain on the islands, with most of them ill and in poor physical condition.

Senator Alben Barkley, who resigned the Senate Democratic leadership last winter in protest of President Roosevelt's veto of a tax bill, today endorsed a fourth Roosevelt term in the White House. In article released today in the new issue of Collier's Magazine, an article by Barkley entitled "Why I Support Roosevelt" cites the President as "far and away the best qualified man" for the job, and declares that there are "no grounds" for fear of a dictatorship. Barkley's was the third significant comment endorsing a fourth term this week, coinciding with the announcement that a tentative majority of Roosevelt delegates to the Democratic National Convention has been achieved.

("**Sniff***")

A riot in the cafeteria at the High School For Homemaking, 901 Classon Avenue, ended yesterday with the arrest of one student and extensive damage to tables, chairs, and crockery. 16-year-old Ruth Gallop of 531 Macon Street was charged with instigating the disturbance by assaulting a general science teacher, Herbert Levine, who was in charge of the cafeteria at the time, after he admonished the girl for cutting in the lunch line. Police allege that Miss Gallop "jumped at Mr. Levine," punching him with clenched fists, and when other girls went to her aid, an opposing faction of pupils counterattacked. Within moments, it was charged, the entire cafeteria erupted into a "general free for all." Fifteen patrolmen and 10 detectives arrived at the scene, summoned by teachers, in time to find Mr. Levine nursing a variety of injuries to his face and neck. Miss Gallop was charged with assault and arraigned in Adolescents Court. She will face a hearing on Monday. Another pupil, 17-year-old Ruth Coristo of 386 Vernon Avenue, was taken to Jewish Hospital with injuries described as "serious." Three other girls were treated for minor injuries.

("I have only one rule, class -- DON'T CUT IN LINE!")

("T'ey got a lotta damn noive," growls Sally aloud, jabbing her fork into a desultory plate of Kraft Dinner. "T'ree mont's t'ey coulda waited, an'...Leonoreh, don' feed t'at to t'cat." "Stella likes it," protests Leonora, making a stern face. "Make her fat." "We don' wanna fat cat," counters Sally. "A fat cat don' catch no mice." "Stella dowanna catch mouse," frowns Leonora. "Stella wanna SLEEP! Can't make'm do whatt'ey don' wanna." "Izzat what'teh teachin' ya at t'at clinic?" replies Sally, unwilling to engage in debate with a three-year-old. She is saved from framing a response by a knock at the door, which she opens to find a uniformed teenage girl, her jaw mastigating a wad of gum. "Telegram," announces the messenger, thrusting forward the yellow envelope. "T'anks," replies Sally mechanically, reaching into her purse for a quarter which she flips to the girl and then closes the door. She slits open the envelope with a bread knife, and extracts the folded sheet. "Oh my gawd!" she exclaims, scanning the text. "Uh oh," interjects Leonora, flipping Stella another orange-colored morsel.)

(Woo hoo, two games over .500!)

(Point of order: how many writers actually bother to sweep the carpet??)

(Right out of Dashiell Hammett.)

(Poor sheltered child.)

(It's all so unbearably wholesome. Wait, those eyes -- she's a morphine addict!)

(You owe her one, fleabag. And you'll find that KITTY ALWAYS COLLECTS ON HER DEBTS. Oh, and exactly what is going on with that telephone? I know that Ma Bell has been forced to hodgepodge together a lot of random parts to meet wartime demand, but that's ridiculous.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Work's been tight for phony counts these days, so they gotta take what they can get.

Speaking of which, it's been a long time since we heard from Tommy. Wonder if he finally got drafted?

Yeahhhhhh, Davega Punjab is no match for Real Punjab.

"That's why I'm careful to pay for two out of every three apples I take."

They'll get him but he'll die from gangrene from all that polluted water in his OPEN NECK WOUND.

"I had the Good Conduct Medal too, but, um, I lost it in a crap game."

"Five bucks will buy the bum off!"

Of course she keeps a dynamite plunger RIGHT THERE.

Nah, doesn't look a bit different.

War is hell.

 

[Fading Fast]

" I know it's hawrd t'b'lieve, but I neveh had awlat much schoolin'"

Nobody is a more well-developed character on fewer words than Krause.

*********************************************

A riot in the cafeteria at the High School For Homemaking, 901 Classon Avenue, ended yesterday with the arrest of one student and extensive damage to tables, chairs, and crockery. 16-year-old Ruth Gallop of 531 Macon Street was charged with instigating the disturbance by assaulting a general science teacher, Herbert Levine, who was in charge of the cafeteria at the time, after he admonished the girl for cutting in the lunch line. Police allege that Miss Gallop "jumped at Mr. Levine," punching him with clenched fists, and when other girls went to her aid, an opposing faction of pupils counterattacked. Within moments, it was charged, the entire cafeteria erupted into a "general free for all." Fifteen patrolmen and 10 detectives arrived at the scene, summoned by teachers, in time to find Mr. Levine nursing a variety of injuries to his face and neck. Miss Gallop was charged with assault and arraigned in Adolescents Court. She will face a hearing on Monday. Another pupil, 17-year-old Ruth Coristo of 386 Vernon Avenue, was taken to Jewish Hospital with injuries described as "serious." Three other girls were treated for minor injuries.

The gentler sex.

************************************************

"I've cranked for the Yanks."

Dare I say it, now we have the most Burma line ever.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

Well I always surmised Burms was dynamite in the sack.

 

[Fading Fast]

Well I always surmised Burms was dynamite in the sack.

You will now receive a ten-minute bad pun time out.

Okay, it was kinda funny.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

You will now receive a ten-minute bad pun time out.

Okay, it was kinda funny.

Caniff is quite adept at protracted tension story-line sketch but a cave in and dig out for Burms would test my patience to its limit. I'm chance he knew this so a misfire will occur.
Our lad and lass will be reunited soon.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

Ms Elizabeth,
If you are a thoroughbred stakes player or would be interested said, I will start looking
the Preakness over tomorrow and would be happy to share my Thurs-Friday conclusions with you. My American book is TVG online. TVG accepts wagers nationwide and I assume its service includes Maine. Initiate further converse if interested.
Best,
Lamont

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Yeh," nods Sally, sliding the telegram across the counter. "He's comin' in t'marra mawrnin'." "Well howcoom," replies Ma, "is Solly Pincus wirin' YOU? Ain'ee got fam'ly of his oon?" "No," shrugs Sally. "His ma an' pa was t' on'y ones come t't'is country, an'neh dead now. Awlarest'v'is relatives is still in -- um -- Goimany. Awr t'ey was, Solly neveh hoid nut'n from any'v'm since t'wawr stawrted." "Oh," nods Ma, her voice somber. "Yeh," agrees Sally. "I figyeh t'at's why he was so quick t'jern up. Anyways, me'n Joe's about t'on'y fam'ly he's got left. Him an' Joe been pals since t'ey was kids, an'nen'ney was at t'pickle woiks t'get'teh. Solly's'a one got Joe t'at jawb in fack. An'nee was bes' man at awr wedd'n." "Ah," ahs Ma, still peevish seven years later over the circumstances of that particular ceremony. "So ye tol' me. But see here, daughter, what's he goin' t'do while he's home? He caaan't stay with you!" "Jeez, Ma," sighs Sally. "T'way you t'ink. He’ll probly get a room at t' Y awr a hotel a'sump'n. Awl 'ee wants is t'get t'gett'eh wit' me f'lunch on Sunday once 'is train gets in, do some catchin' oop, y'know." "And you a married wooman," admonishes Ma. "Oi don't know this man as well as yoo do, but Oi know soldjaars." "You neveh knew no soldjehs," snickers Sally. "You sawr 'What Price Glawry' an' ya t'ink ya know soldjehs." "Them wasn't soldjarrs in thaaat pictcharr, daughter," corrects Ma, "them was Marines. But dooon't fargett ya faathar was a soldjarr. Oh, Oi know soldjarrs. And Oi'd not be aloon with one. Take Alice Dooley with ye, if he trois any foony stuff, she'll getchee ooot of it." "F'gawdsakes, Ma," marvels Sally. "It's 1944. I ain' fifteen yeehs ol', an' I don' need no chapehrones." "What's aaahl this noow," greets Uncle Frank, entering from the back room. "Solly Pincus is comin' home," explains Sally. "Not f'good, just awn leave. Fois' t'ime 'ee's been home in moeh'n two yeehs." "Well now!" grins Uncle Frank. "Solly Pincus. A foine boy, he is. Bring him aroond faaahr dinner. Oi'll taahlk t' Shaughnessy, see if Oi can get a nice brisket." Y'don't haave t'taaahlk t' Shaughnessy, Francis," interrupts Ma. "Brisket's aaahf th' ration." "Hmph, them Boohack briskets, no thaaank ye," dismisses Uncle Frank. "This is an occasion, an' an occasion caahls f'ra Shaughnessy brisket. B'soides," he chuckles, "Shaughnessy's behoind ahhn 'is bill, aaaahn this'll give me a chaaance t'c'lect." "Who's Shaughnessy?" queries Sally. "Somebody ya done plumbin' fawr?" "Ah," ahs Uncle Frank, catching himself. "Ye -- moit -- caahl it that." )

(Well said.)

("Meh. I'd trade it all for a night at Loew's Met.")

(No, not what you're thinking. The "silk nighties" in question are the special gleaming satin uniforms the Dodgers will be wearing this year for all night games. The road suits are a vivid "Alice blue" with white trimming, and come with matching satin caps. Picture to follow!)

("A radical departure from his usual type of role." Well, sort of.)

("Soprano screams." Hmph, you're an alto and you know it.)

(I lost my husb--- hey, take off that phony moustache! YOU CAN'T FOOL ME YOU WORM!)

(Yeah, right. Close enough.)

(Please welcome our special guest today, Miss Norma Shearer.)

(It seems that Kitty is well known in this neighborhood. AS SHE SHOULD BE.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And as promised...

This is Leo Durocher's own impeccably tailored 1944 satin road uniform. It was auctioned off some years ago for over $18,000 to someone with exquisite taste in gentlemen's evening attire.

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick....

From everything I have ever read of Mr. DiMaggio, he was not a pleasant man to live with.

Notice that Caniff doesn't cheapen up his strip with obtrusive comic-book sound effects. He doesn't need to.

"I mean NOW."

For someone who you can literally smell thru the comic page, Willie sure spends a lot of time in the tub. Maybe he ought to try using water.

"You'll always be my -- snif -- rattlebrained hepcat..."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Here's a crisp five dollar bill. And there's MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM."

Back from vacation, huh pooch?

KIDS TODAY

Didn't know they had sharks here, didja?

 

[Fading Fast]

(Well said.)

Oh for this exact wisdom today and the policies in all our institutions to reflect it.

Back from vacation, huh pooch?

"I did a short USO tour to support the troops."
"Sandy, where should I put your swim trunks and other vacation items from your stay in Atlantic City?"
"Not now! We'll talk about it later."