The Era -- Day By Day

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"Gee whiz," smiles Margie. "Five grand a week! Thanks, Catholic Theatre Movement!"

"Hey," heys Joe. "Don'cha brutteh have a goilfrien' upta Bronx?" "Yeah. notes Sally. "He says she's t' awrm rasslin' champion' 'a Mosholu Pawrkway."

Well, we kinda knew that all along.

Not everyone is cut out for farm living.

"Besides, with these skills, I should be at least a major."

It's bad luck to open an umbrella in the house.

Careful what you wish for, kid.

So much for "isn't it great not having a lot of staff around."

Would that be her "uncle" the "big butter and egg man?"

Nice knowing ya kid. Starting Monday, "The Adventures of Shadow Smart."

 

[Fading Fast]

("I knew that Amber D'Georg was not her real name." Perceptive of you.)
...

"Amber" is easy, but credit to her for the creativity of "D'Georg."

You can't swing a dead cat in 1942 without hitting a burlesque story.

...

A "Remember Pearl Harbor" parade of 10,000 persons will march thru Brooklyn tomorrow, celebrating the theme "Avenge Pearl Harbor" by promoting the sale of war bonds and stamps. President Newbold Morris of the City Council will review the parade along with representatives of many consulates of Central and South American republics, and State and city officials, and all Brooklyn Civilian Defense organizations, including air raid wardens, city patrol corps members, auxiliary firemen, nurses' aides, parent-teacher aides, and block captains will march. Also participating in the parade will be servicemen, wounded veterans and members of all veterans' organizations, teachers, church and apartment house groups. and members of school societies and political clubs. George Cincotta, commandant of the First New York Division of the Junior Blue Jackets of America, will serve as grand marshal. The parade begins at the corner of Empire Boulevard and Schenectady Avenue tomorrow afternoon at 3 PM.
...

I guess it's because tomorrow is a Sunday in '42 that they aren't holding the parade on December 7th. Still, it feels funny.

...

(How long now till they go after "Star and Garter?" Hey Gyps, better get to work on your next book.)
...

You would think the threat of jail time would really to focus the mind.

"...their sole purpose in producing the show seemed to be to make money by appealing to the least civilized of the theatergoer." That business model doesn't seem out of date in 2022.

And in the Daily News...

"Gee whiz," smiles Margie. "Five grand a week! Thanks, Catholic Theatre Movement!"
...

I'm sure businesswoman Ms. Lee didn't miss that salary quote either.

Thank you Page Four for the pic of Amber D'Georg, she is a cutie, but now I'm wondering which paper is correct about the "D" in the name, is it upper or lower case?

...

Careful what you wish for, kid.
...

In life, never ask to have good luck taken away from you. Both of you, repair the tanks and shut up.

...

Nice knowing ya kid. Starting Monday, "The Adventures of Shadow Smart."

I'm not buying this storyline at all. Still, it's better than "Hugh Striver."

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

Cracklin good copy! Burlesque I believe would serve home morale.

 

[PrivateEye]

I'm not buying this storyline at all. Still, it's better than "Hugh Striver."

Probably, but I can't say for sure - I've stopped reading it.

 

[LizzieMaine]

(Now It Can Be Told! And if you go to the movies this week, you'll see the first release of newsreel footage of the actual attack, shot by Al Brick of Movietone News, who happened to be at Pearl Harbor that day...)

Rallies across Brooklyn tomorrow will mark the first anniversary of the Pearl Harbor attack in a campaign expected to sell hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of war bonds and stamps. The Civilian Defense Volunteers Organization will step off its parade thru the 90th Precinct this afternoon at 3PM, with five thousand marchers expected to participate, and the parade to be followed by a mass rally at Eastern District High School with Congressman Emanuel Cellar presiding and speakers including City Councilmen Louis P. Goldberg, Anthony DiGiovanna, and Peter V. Cacchione. In Williamsburg, residents will parade from Taylor Street to Bedford Avenue to join the Eastern District High School rally at 4PM. Tomorrow in Flatbush, residents of the 67th and 70th Precincts will gather at Erasmus Hall High School, where Magistrate Nicholas H. Pinto will preside over a rally featuring speakers from local American Legion and Jewish War Veterans posts, the American Women's Volunteer Services, and the Red Cross. In Bensonhurst, a rally will be held tomorrow morning at Lafayette High School in which an overseas service ambulance will be presented to the Army in ceremonies beginning at 9 AM.

A year ago tomorrow, most Brooklynites awoke with little awareness of Hawaii other than as an exotic romantic place where "native girls danced the hula-hula," and such a place as Guadalcanal didn't exist. Most arose for church that morning, or slept in from their Saturday night revels, with the general feeling that somehow negotiations would succeed in preventing war in the Pacific. Some Brooklyn folk were planning on an afternoon of Christmas shopping downtown. Others were planning to head up to the Polo Grounds to see the Football Dodgers meet the Giants. Others went visiting, without a second thought for gasoline or rubber. And still others were looking forward to a quiet afternoon of reading the newspaper by their radios. It was the coldest day of the season so far, and housewives pushed up the thermostats without thinking about fuel oil, except perhaps as something for which they'd have to pay a bill. Roasts sizzled in many a Brooklyn oven, and a second or third cup of coffee carried not a single qualm of conscience. And then, at 2:22 PM, the first flashes came over the radio. Military police and the shore patrol scoured neighborhood bars and restaurants ordering soldiers and sailors back to work, telephone switchboards were jammed, and talk of "revenge!" filled the streets. The city was placed on a war footing, and 115 Japanese citizens were seized by the FBI as enemy aliens. The headlines on the December 8th Brooklyn Eagle were bold and stark: "US DECLARES WAR -- 1500 AMERICANS DIE," as Brooklyn, with all the rest of the nation, rushed to join the colors.

Snapshots made at German American Bund meetings by agents of the FBI proved the undoing of ten naturalized German-American citizens rounded up yesterday in Nassau County's largest arrest yet of persons suspected of subversive acts. The ten suspects, including at least two women, were taken to Ellis Island to await action by the Alien Enemy Hearing Board. While the identities of the suspects were not revealed, FBI City Director P. E. Foxworthy stated that firearms and ammunition, shortwave radios, cameras, and a quantity of Nazi propaganda literature were seized in the raids. The suspects had all applied to the German Consul's office, before the declaration of war, to return to Germany, and one of the women had already obtained $2500 in German "rueckwanderer marks," which are redeemable on in Germany. One of the women is reported to have been active in the Nassau County storm trooper section of the Bund, and one of the men was a storm trooper leader.

Three students at Public School 138 yesterday smuggled a homemade wagon loaded with gifts for sailors aboard the subway and rode from Crown Heights to the Wall Street station in Manhattan. The youths, in grade 8-B at the school at 760 Prospect Place, hauled the wagon, loaded with four large cartons filled with magazines, games, puzzles, razors and blades, and other morale-building articles, out of the station and up the stairs, and from there tried to haul it all the way to the headquarters of the United States Seaman's Service at 39 Broadway. The boys, 13-year old Henry Iatrides, and 14-year-olds Charles Hallacy and George Murtechelly, didn't get far with the wagon before it broke down in the middle of Broadway, but undaunted, they abandoned their contraption and carried the gifts by hand the rest of the way. The boys told Seaman's Service workers that they had heard film star Madeline Carroll make an appeal for the agency over the radio, and were there to do their part. As they left, they told executive secretary Mrs. Janet Van Tyne that they'd "be back soon with more."

(Say what you will about censorship, but it would have served no good purpose to see these photos a year ago.)

Five hundred and twenty one service stations across Brooklyn with a total of 1521 accredited tire inspectors on duty have now been designated by the Office of Price Administration as Tire Inspection Stations, giving a ratio of one tire inspector for every 360 vehicles in the borough. Kings County OPA Administrator George C. Tilyou declared that this number of inspectors should serve sufficiently for present needs, but if necessary additional inspectors will be appointed to fill demand. Brooklyn car owners have until January 31st to submit their vehicles for tire inspections. The inspectors will record the serial number of each tire in each motorist's possession, and vehicles operating under "A" cards, or motorcycles with "D" books, must be presented for inspection again starting February 1st, and thereafter at least every four months, with an interval of at least sixty day between inspections. Those holding B or C books must present their vehicles for inspection at least every sixty days, with an interval of no less than 30 days between inspections. Tires on commercial vehicles, operating on T cards, will be inspected every sixty days or every 5000 miles, which ever comes first. There will be a base fee of twenty five cents for each passenger car inspection if the tires do not need to be dismounted, but if dismounting is necessary there will be an additional fee of fifty cents per tire.

("T'eah, now," trumpets Sally. "Y'see! I TOL''at McDonal' t'ey betteh not let Fitz go, an' fin'ly he lissens! If on'y 'at big dope Rickey would lissen, why, we might have sump'n to look f'owrw'ud ta!" "I heeah t'ey gonna move Hoiman t'fois' base, an' put'tat Kampouris on secon'," remarks Joe. "HAH!" hahs Sally. "You wait. Kampahoozis gonna play f't Pittsboigs nex' yeah, an' we gonna be all fixed up f'secon'! McDonal' knows what t'do!" "I heah McDonal's lookin' f'anutt'eh job," notes Joe. "Somebody downa plant hoid Dixie tawkin' 'bout it." "HAH!" hahs Sally again. "Who ya gonna trus', Dixie Wawkeh or somebody tawks t' McDonal' onna phone awla time." "He don' get inna woid much," sighs Joe. "What?" "Nut'n.")

(The War Till Now...)

A 19-year-old Brooklyn lad with a prominent nose, big horn-rimmed glasses, and no chin is heard every week by more than 42,000,000 radio listeners who never knew his name till now. He's Arnold Stang, who plays everything from frightened little fellows to scared rabbits on the air, and is now on leave from his seven regular radio shows to make his film debut in Hollywood. You've heard him in character roles on "The Goldbergs," "The Parker Family," "Easy Aces," "Don Winslow of the Navy," "Tillie the Toiler," "Johnny Presents," and "The Philip Morris Playhouse," and now you'll see him on the screen in a prominent comedy part in the forthcoming RKO musical "Seven Days Leave," alongside Victor Mature, Lucille Ball, and Mexican star Mapy Cortez. Young Arnold usually plays meek characters, and is himself on the meek side, except when it comes to getting himself good parts. He broke in at the age of 13 on the WJZ Children's Hour and became the youngest dialectician in radio. In addition to his own distinctly Brooklyn voice, Arnold is a master of several other characterizations, including cockney, Negro, Jewish, Irish, Swedish, Russian, German, and Italian. When he isn't making with a "virile" character, his normal voice is a sort of tenor-falsetto squeak, which he puts to good use as Victor Mature's buddy in "Seven Days Leave." It's his first film role where you see him, but he's already done a couple of other movie turns as the voice of various cartoon characters.

(KINKY CAN'T SAVE YOU NOW!!!)

(Hey General Vinegar, MAYBE YOU COULD HELP TERRY OUT)

(Never trust a doctor whose head is smaller than his fist.)

("Look, Phil, we're not married, yet you come over to my house and sit around reading the paper? Plus, you're an idiot? This isn't going to work out!")

(Sorry, Doctor Dumbnut, if you look down at the snow you'll she's that many steps ahead of you. And Dan says "yeah, a little off the sides, but leave the top long. And see if you can get the ol' pomp to stand up a little higher.")

(Mr. Hix isn't entirely wrong, but his timing is a bit off.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"Sharing in the general movement to entertain the military."

"WATCH T' BROOKLYN CRACKS, BUD! MASPETH AIN' SO HOT!"

"TRACY! Prune Face has Tess tied up in his secret lair!" "Is that so? Hey, anybody know where Frizz is staying?"

When Mr. Gray is working he likes to listen to "Young Widder Brown."

Actually, I'd think this guy would do a great business in this neighborhood.

"Ooops, she's unconscious again. Wonder how that happened." "Y'dropped ya gun, Sah-jint." "Clumsy of me."

"Die Luftschraube."

Judy will be eight next year, so she's right on schedule.

It's just as well they're not in the Army.

"The most understanding parents in the world!" he said when Child Welfare Services called.

 

[Fading Fast]

(Now It Can Be Told! And if you go to the movies this week, you'll see the first release of newsreel footage of the actual attack, shot by Al Brick of Movietone News, who happened to be at Pearl Harbor that day...)


...

Of course the pickpocket mother of four easily posted bail, she should be flush with cash.

...

A 19-year-old Brooklyn lad with a prominent nose, big horn-rimmed glasses, and no chin is heard every week by more than 42,000,000 radio listeners who never knew his name till now. He's Arnold Stang, who plays everything from frightened little fellows to scared rabbits on the air, and is now on leave from his seven regular radio shows to make his film debut in Hollywood. You've heard him in character roles on "The Goldbergs," "The Parker Family," "Easy Aces," "Don Winslow of the Navy," "Tillie the Toiler," "Johnny Presents," and "The Philip Morris Playhouse," and now you'll see him on the screen in a prominent comedy part in the forthcoming RKO musical "Seven Days Leave," alongside Victor Mature, Lucille Ball, and Mexican star Mapy Cortez. Young Arnold usually plays meek characters, and is himself on the meek side, except when it comes to getting himself good parts. He broke in at the age of 13 on the WJZ Children's Hour and became the youngest dialectician in radio. In addition to his own distinctly Brooklyn voice, Arnold is a master of several other characterizations, including cockney, Negro, Jewish, Irish, Swedish, Russian, German, and Italian. When he isn't making with a "virile" character, his normal voice is a sort of tenor-falsetto squeak, which he puts to good use as Victor Mature's buddy in "Seven Days Leave." It's his first film role where you see him, but he's already done a couple of other movie turns as the voice of various cartoon characters.
...

Many of us will recognize Mr. Stang from his many movie and TV roles like the below pic of him being one of the two gas station owners (he's on the far right) whom Jonathan Winters bounces all over the place in "It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World."

And in the Daily News...

"Sharing in the general movement to entertain the military."
...

"...think it's their patriotic duty to give their all to the soldiers and sailors." [Emphasis added]

...

"TRACY! Prune Face has Tess tied up in his secret lair!" "Is that so? Hey, anybody know where Frizz is staying?"
...

Or even worse, "Hey Frizzy, sorry to wake you, I have to get up and go rescue Tess. Why don't you just roll over and go back to sleep."

...

When Mr. Gray is working he likes to listen to "Young Widder Brown."
...

Thanks for the recap Harold.

Kate learns an important lesson about striking while the irons hot. Many a man/woman have waited too long and lost out to the newcomer. We've all seen it happen many times.

...

"Ooops, she's unconscious again. Wonder how that happened." "Y'dropped ya gun, Sah-jint." "Clumsy of me."
...

It's going to be a different Terry on the other side of this and that Terry will be ready for the Burmas and Rouges of the world.

...


"Die Luftschraube."
...

If you're not going to just put a bullet in your enemy's head, then make sure you tie him up tight enough so that he doesn't escape, take off in a plane and shoot out one of your engines.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

That Terry isn't a soldier?

 

[LizzieMaine]

Terry is a kid who grew up knocking around China with his pal Pat Ryan, and spent the thirties having brisk adventures with various colorful personalities, but he has not yet joined the Army. The injured woman, Rogue, is a French collaborator who was involved in nefarious activities with the Japanese, and when Terry fell into her hands she disguised him in a stolen Army uniform and forced him to act as her pawn. And now he's afraid to tell these American soldiers that he's not really one of them, which, under the circumstances, is not a good position to be in.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and I wonder what Mrs. Auerbach picked up in that candy store?

 

[Fading Fast]

Oh, and I wonder what Mrs. Auerbach picked up in that candy store?

The only thing we are sure of is It wasn't candy. I'm going with betting slips' payoff money (or she was dropping the next day's slips off), as she's probably a runner too. She seems like an "enterprising" mother of four.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

Terry fell into her hands. And this Rouge is a French tart and the kid acts as if he'd quicked Aldershot and Brecon Beacons. A Yank wearing the King's coat but not a regular. For days length he keeps belt plate stayed shirt gig he'll do.

 

[LizzieMaine]

(Mr. Amen may be gone but his asphalt-racket-busting legacy lingers on. Oh, and every single controversy Butch has ever been involved in can be summed up as "it is apparent that there is a conflict of views.")

A detachment of Marine raiders prepared for the four-month anniversary of the Battle of the Solomon Islands today by wiping out 400 Japanese and five enemy bases at the cost of only 17 American lives. The raiders returned to their base on Guadalcanal last Friday after extended operations in the mountainous jungle south and southwest of the Henderson airfield. Ever since the last big Japanese offensive early this month, Americans have been mopping up small detachments of enemy troops as a prelude to a drive toward the main Japanese force on the northwest end of the island.

Allied forces in the Buna area of New Guinea had the Japanese bottled in three narrow pockets today, as they drive another wedge thru the enemy between Buna and the Buna Mission. Rough going thru swamps thick with thorny wild sago and across numerous river mouths was ahead in the mopping-up operation.

Admiral Chester W. Nimitz declared today from his headquarters at Pearl Harbor that the Pacific war "has entered a new phase of new and heavy surface clashes, due to large-scale carrier losses by both sides, in which American vessels damaged in last year's attack by Japan against the Pearl Harbor fleet will take their revenge. Meanwhile in Washington, Admiral Ernest J. King underlined that "December 7, 1942 is just another day in the war."

Borough President John Cashmore called on Brooklyn residents to observe the first anniversary of Pearl Harbor by pledging themselves to work harder and buy more war bonds in support of those doing the fighting. "The year that has gone by since the bombing of Pearl Harbor has left its scars on the heart of Brooklyn," declared Mr. Cashmore. "The pain of some of these scars may be dulled, but can never be erased. It is to the thousands of young men and women in the fighting forces, and anxious parents and close ones left behind that we must pledge that all our efforts shall be directed to the common purpose -- the winning of the war on all fronts, quickly and efficiently."

("Getcha feet out t'a oven," says Sally. "Lemme getta look att'm." "Aw, you seen my feet lotsa times," replies Joe. "We been married, what, goin' on six yeeahs." "Jus' hol' still," insists Sally, producing a ruler, a pencil, and a Big Chief tablet, and pulling off her husband's old grey socks. "Putcha foot on'neah, an' don' move." "Whassis' all about," sputters Joe, as Sally makes a quick tracing around the perimeter of his pedal extremities. "You'll fin' out," declares Sally, tossing her husband his socks.)

A police patrolman was arrested at his Garden City, Long Island home today, while wearing the finely-tailored uniform of an Army Air Corps major. Forty-one-year old Patrolman Milton H. Dunwoody, assigned to the supply headquarters in Manhattan, at first claimed that he had been given the rank of major while on "special assignment to the Interceptor Command" at Mitchel Field, but after Army authorities at the air base denied any knowledge of Patrolman Dunwoody, he admitted that he actually bought the uniform two months ago "to dazzle his wife," to whom he has been married for seventeen years. There are no children.

Meanwhile, a sash-door manufacturer from Canarsie was arrested in East Elmhurst yesterday after a policeman pulled him over for a speeding violation. Thirty-six-year-old Nat Drucker of 653 E. 95th Street was togged out in the uniform of an Army Air Force lieutenant when he was stopped by a motorcycle cop on the Grand Central Parkway, but the policeman became suspicious when Drucker identified himself "in a thick foreign accent." Taken to the police station for further questioning, Drucker admitted that he was not an actual lieutenant, but said that he had recently been reclassified to 1-A by his draft board. He further stated that he come to the United States from Pinsk, Poland, and that he was a naturalized citizen, and added that his wife had died recently. In his car were found several impressive professional photographs of himself wearing the uniform in which he was arrested. Before Drucker was turned over to the FBI, he was issued a speeding ticket.

(Keep 'em flying!")

The play "Native Son," the drama of Negro life originally produced by Orson Welles from the book by Richard Wright, which has run since March 1941 at the Majestic Theatre, will close after this week, by order of theatre owner Lee Shubert, who declared that he was shutting the show down voluntarily rather than lose another theatre license. Shubert is also the owner of the Ambassador Theatre, former home of "Wine, Women, and Song," which lost its operating license after a jury ruled that the musical revue starring Margie Hart and Jimmy Savo was indecent. "I did this of my own accord," maintained Shubert in announcing the closing. "I don't want any more trouble." "Native Son," which stars actor Canada Lee in the lead role of Bigger Thomas, has received wide acclaim from critics, but was condemned as "wholly objectionable" by the Catholic Theatre League, the organization behind the complaint that brought down the curtain on "Wine, Women, and Song."

Five women landed in court yesterday on "tinhorn" charges. Appearing before Magistrate Charles Hirsimaki were 53 year old Belle Branham of 214 Livonia Street, charged with bookmaking, possession of betting slips found hidden in a Bible , and selling liquor without a license and her sister 46-year-old Belle McCarthy of the same address, who told police that the 275 slips found in her bedroom represented "her own bets." 32-year-old Mary Rabinowitz of 3056 Fulton Street was held on $500 bail on a charge of "making book" at the candy store she operates at that address. She told the magistrate that she was trying to raise $50 to pay off a debt before Christmas. Thirty-seven year old Mary Saranginaga of 66 Columbia Street , a restaurant operator, was held on $500 bail for serving liquor to customers in coffee cups without a license. And forty-seven-year-old Goldie Berman, who operates a candy store at 462 Ashford Street, was arrested after she awarded a patrolman a pocket knife after he made three "plays" on a peanut-vending machine. "I don't pay off to no one but children on that machine," the patrolman testified Mrs. Berman told him, "so there is no use of you playing it."

("That man!")

The pastor of Plymouth Church of the Pilgrims yesterday endorsed Mayor LaGuardia's crusade against bingo, and expressed regret that the churches of New York City have become so identified with the game. The Rev. Dr. L. Wendell Fifield in his sermon declared that to be worthy and to fulfill its mission as the custodian of spiritual reality, the Church must "stand above every group in the community in its allegiance to moral and spiritual ideals." "It requires no stretch of the imagination," declared Dr. Fifield. "to picture what would happen if the Christ who drove the money changers out of the ancient temple were to chance upon a bingo game in a modern church."

(I have no doubt that Lou "The Mad Russian" Novikoff would be a tremendous hit at Ebbets Field, but one-on-one for Medwick? Even in his present diminished form, Ducky is worth more than that. See if you can get them to throw in Passeau, he'd be good for a few brawls.)

(All right, now THAT's a plot twist I didn't see coming.)

(That's why you should always spend a little extra for the bulletproof swimsuit.)

("Aw jeez, and I paid $39 at Bond!")

(HEY NOW COME ON THAT'S NOT IN THE SCRIPT! DID THAT ORANGE-FURRED MONGREL PUT YOU UP TO THIS? SCOUNDREL! TRAITOR! QUISLING!)

(How fortunate that they didn't use a Linotype for their cheap Nazi pamphlets.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

I guess it depends on what the sailor wants to do after 1:30 AM.

Never mind war censorship, I want to know what John Murray Anderson, one of the most important figures in the 20th Century American musical theatre, thinks about "Wine, Women, and Song."

Maybe you should get together with Miss Prang.

"I can understand his not liking Mother's hot cocoa." Tess is just a regular bundle of resentments.

Oh, Min.

Careful, son -- this isn't like playing Army with Gootch and Trixie behind Uncle Walt's garage.

Think of it as a "battlefield non-commission."

"Why, it's that young fool Teen -- who was fooling around with my daughters! I THOUGHT I WAS RID OF HIM!"

Unclear On The Concept.

Isn't it time Moon's draft status was reviewed?

 

[LizzieMaine]

Oh, and...

OH that Bob Hope. "Hmph," hmphs Butch. "Let him show HIS nose in this town again!"

 

[Fading Fast]

(Mr. Amen may be gone but his asphalt-racket-busting legacy lingers on. Oh, and every single controversy Butch has ever been involved in can be summed up as "it is apparent that there is a conflict of views.")
...

Always good to see the crooks involved in the pavement scandal convicted, but it makes your blood boil to think about what Flynn got away with.

A young Tennessee William thinks to himself, I can do something with the name of that woman shot in the car as some future thing I write will need a good ethnic name like that.

...

A police patrolman was arrested at his Garden City, Long Island home today, while wearing the finely-tailored uniform of an Army Air Corps major. Forty-one-year old Patrolman Milton H. Dunwoody, assigned to the supply headquarters in Manhattan, at first claimed that he had been given the rank of major while on "special assignment to the Interceptor Command" at Mitchel Field, but after Army authorities at the air base denied any knowledge of Patrolman Dunwoody, he admitted that he actually bought the uniform two months ago "to dazzle his wife," to whom he has been married for seventeen years. There are no children.

Meanwhile, a sash-door manufacturer from Canarsie was arrested in East Elmhurst yesterday after a policeman pulled him over for a speeding violation. Thirty-six-year-old Nat Drucker of 653 E. 95th Street was togged out in the uniform of an Army Air Force lieutenant when he was stopped by a motorcycle cop on the Grand Central Parkway, but the policeman became suspicious when Drucker identified himself "in a thick foreign accent." Taken to the police station for further questioning, Drucker admitted that he was not an actual lieutenant, but said that he had recently been reclassified to 1-A by his draft board. He further stated that he come to the United States from Pinsk, Poland, and that he was a naturalized citizen, and added that his wife had died recently. In his car were found several impressive professional photographs of himself wearing the uniform in which he was arrested. Before Drucker was turned over to the FBI, he was issued a speeding ticket.
...

Since we see these stories with some regularity and, one assumes, only a small number of them make it to the paper, this is obviously a bigger thing than you'd think it would be.

...

(Keep 'em flying!")
...

Thank you, Joe.

...

Five women landed in court yesterday on "tinhorn" charges. Appearing before Magistrate Charles Hirsimaki were 53 year old Belle Branham of 214 Livonia Street, charged with bookmaking, possession of betting slips found hidden in a Bible , and selling liquor without a license and her sister 46-year-old Belle McCarthy of the same address, who told police that the 275 slips found in her bedroom represented "her own bets." 32-year-old Mary Rabinowitz of 3056 Fulton Street was held on $500 bail on a charge of "making book" at the candy store she operates at that address. She told the magistrate that she was trying to raise $50 to pay off a debt before Christmas. Thirty-seven year old Mary Saranginaga of 66 Columbia Street , a restaurant operator, was held on $500 bail for serving liquor to customers in coffee cups without a license. And forty-seven-year-old Goldie Berman, who operates a candy store at 462 Ashford Street, was arrested after she awarded a patrolman a pocket knife after he made three "plays" on a peanut-vending machine. "I don't pay off to no one but children on that machine," the patrolman testified Mrs. Berman told him, "so there is no use of you playing it."
...

Even this agnostic knows you don't tempt fate by hiding bettings slips in a Bible.

Once again, we see that candy store are some of the most interesting places in America in the 1940s.

And yay girl power 1942 style, as women prove they can run illegal businesses too.

...

("Aw jeez, and I paid $39 at Bond!")
...

I think Cottonmouth is confusing a lie-detector with sodium Pentothal.

...

(HEY NOW COME ON THAT'S NOT IN THE SCRIPT! DID THAT ORANGE-FURRED MONGREL PUT YOU UP TO THIS? SCOUNDREL! TRAITOR! QUISLING!)
...

"Orange-furred mongrel! Get my lawyer on the phone, I'm suing for libel"
"You don't have one because you're too cheap, which is why you're locked into a terrible long-term contract with Gray."
"Get my agent on the phone and tell him to get me a lawyer!"
"You don't have an agent anymore as you fired your agent when Bo got a better merchandizing deal than you did."
"Well, you get me a lawyer then!"
"You told me you hate me."
"Fine, I'll get a lawyer myself! [ten minutes of futilely trying to turn individual phonebook pages later] Damn, no opposable thumbs. I don't hate you anymore, get me a lawyer."
"Yeah, that's not transparent."

...

"I can understand his not liking Mother's hot cocoa." Tess is just a regular bundle of resentments.
...

To be fair to Tess' emotional state, she did notice a couple of wiry blonde hairs on Tracy's coat collar today.

Oh, and...

OH that Bob Hope. "Hmph," hmphs Butch. "Let him show HIS nose in this town again!"

Fire safety inspection and new safety rules and regs - great / chasing down theater owners because some girls aren't fully clothed on stage - yawn.

[copy and paste] There is no detail too small for Butch; prioritizing is not his superpower.

 

[LizzieMaine]

It amazes me that any schmo can walk into a store and buy an officers' uniform, with insignia complete, without having to show any kind of ID. When I was in the Girl Scouts you had to show ID to buy a uniform, which is why you don't see forty-one-year-old cops in loveless marriages dressing up all the time as Cadettes.

 

[FOXTROT LAMONT]

^ Scandal here over pandemic war profiteer by a female Lords. Terrence seems quite tied by his fix,
toast with jam but he seems the sort to soldier on. Never comfortable in any uniform much less a sewn blanket,
cannot understand illicit wearing fools. All good copy.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Shows what you know!" hmphs Butch. "Since when do I need to make a nuisance of myself to get my name in the papers??")

Allied air forces had destroyed 21 more Japanese planes on the New Guinea front today as methodical preparations went on for a final assault against enemy garrisons in the Buna area. "As far as ground fighting is concerned," stated a spokesman for Gen. Douglas MacArthur, "this hasn't been a quiet day up there. Just because it isn't reported that Buna is captured, it doesn't mean there hasn't been fighting to beat hell up there."

In Philadelphia, the Navy yesterday launched its heaviest battleship ever, with Navy Undersecretary James V. Forrestal promising that she will be ready within five months to help avenge the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. The U. S. S. New Jersey slid into the Delaware River after being christened by Mrs. Charles Edison, wife of the New Jersey governor. The new ship has been designed to reflect "all the lessons learned at Pearl Harbor and in subsequent naval battles, particularly in battles involving air power."

Secretary of the Navy Frank Knox declared today that the latest manpower order will not affect the size of the Navy or its operations. Although voluntary enlistments in all military branches for men between the ages of 18 and 38 have been halted by President Roosevelt's executive order issued Saturday, the Navy will draw men from the Selective Service pool under monthly recruitment quotas. Secretary Knox repeated an earlier announcement by War Manpower Chief Paul V. McNutt that selectees will be entitled to declare a preference for choice of service between the Army, Navy, Marine Corps, and Coast Guard, but also emphasized that the physical requirements for Navy service are higher than those for the Army, and men not physically qualified for the Navy might still be acceptable for Army service. Under the President's order, enlistments by 17-year-olds, with parental permission, will still be accepted, as will the enlistments of men over the age of 38 who possess certain needed skills.

An order by Majestic Theatre owner Lee Shubert closing the Broadway play "Native Son" was rescinded today in the face of protests by the New York League of Theatres, the Dramatists Guild, Actors Equity, ant the Association of Theatrical Agents and Managers Unions. Shubert had ordered the drama of Negro life based on the book by Richard Wright closed in the face of its condemnation by the Catholic Theatre Movement, and in the wake of a jury verdict ordering the closing of the revue "Wine, Women, and Song." The Catholic Theatre Movement had declared "Native Son" "wholly objectionable," along with "Wine, Women, and Song" and the Gypsy Rose Lee/Bobby Clark revue "Star and Garter."

Pencil erasers will soon be in short supply, with the War Production Board having prohibited the use of crude or reclaimed rubber in their manufacture. The order also includes an across-the-board reduction on the manufacture of pencils and pens and bans the use of any critical materials in their production.

The current shortage of circulating coins has led the Treasury Department to issue a request to the nation's 30,000,000 school children to open up their piggy banks and turn in the coins at banks. State, county, and local school superintendants nationwide are being urged to organize "coin roundups" to help head off the present shortage of small change. Director of the Mint Mrs. Nellie Taylor Ross stressed that the request should not be interpreted as meaning children should stop saving, but only that they should turn in their coins for war savings stamps, or, as second choice, paper currency.

(I don't know that a wartime production of "The Mikado" would be in exactly the best of taste, but who am I, the Catholic Theatre Movement?)

(Regular OCS material right here.)

A 28 year old Park Slope man is being held in Jersey City on charges that he hijacked a truckload of coffee last month. Thomas Cantaldo of 825 Union Street was arraigned today in Jersey City Court on kidnapping and robbery charges and is being held on $50,000 bail pending grand jury action. Cantaldo is charged with being one of five men who stopped a truck carrying $5000 worth of coffee on November 25th, and with transporting truck driver Frank Borowy across the state line from Jersey City to Long Island City, where he was bound, gagged, and abandoned in his emptied truck. The other four hijackers have not been found, and the load of coffee has not been recovered.

(Judge Landis, a sworn enemy of the "farm system" model of major league domination of minor league clubs, has been waiting years for an opportunity just like this.)

("Ma rolled a 290 game las' night," says Sally. "She's get'nna hang of it. She says Fitz himself come oveh t'wawrch." "Didn' make 'at las' frame, eh?" comments Joe. "Well," shrugs Sally, "she was distracted.")

(Miss Prang is Mary's long lost sister CONFIRMED.)

(Oh yeah? Well at that range, the wadding from a blank can still do some damage, especially if all you've got on is a bathing suit!)

(The joke's on them -- a real lie detector has multiple traces, not just one. SO THERE.)

(TAKE OFF THAT CHEAP DISGUISE "TRIX," WE KNOW WHO YOU *REALLY* ARE!)

(Boris Karloff is ready for ANYTHING. Hey, I hear they need a new villain in "Annie.")

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Where's hero cabbie Leonard Weinberg when we need him?

"Are you doing anything about it?" "Shut up and eat your liverwurst."

"What? You know how hard it is to get cold cream?"

Hon, it's time to move on.

"NO TESS! COME DOWN! HE'S A MAN OF THE CLOTH!!"

"I'm forming a Homeowner's Association -- and we're voting you out!"

No cartoonists are happily married.

And there's the final gun.

Joke while you can, boys.

"Damn, and I thought I'd be going home early tonight."