The decline of good parenting...

[Steve]

Nowhere in my post did I say that I advocate bullying or abuse. Nowhere did I say that it is right to beat a child's butt because they went "ah" in a restaurant.

My mother never, ever abused me, and when I talked about being raised with corporal punishment, it was within that context. I am a professing Christian, and I believe in what the Bible says about disciplining children. However, I do believe in limits; which is something I probably should have said before now based upon what I've read today.

I was never bullied or abused, I was spanked as a last resort when I was being too stubborn or impudent to be reasoned with. I can see quite plainly that not everyone here believes in that method, and that's your business. I wasn't trying to persuade you to my way of thinking, and I'm addressing no one in particular here. I was merely making the point that my parents would not have stood for me making a nuisance of myself in a public place like that, especially if I was causing trouble for someone else.

My point was to say, however people raise their children, whether it be by the spoon or the spoken word, they should at least have the decency to train their kids to be mindful of others in a public place, I.E. Carabba's last night.

And Colonel, if you see this, I was at the Pensacola location. And by the way, I got a kick out of your location.

 

[Marc Chevalier]

Nowhere did I say that it is right to beat a child's butt because they went "ah" in a restaurant.

If I ever said "ah" in a restaurant, I would pull my own tongue out, stab it repeatedly with a fork, and cut it off with a dull butterknife. Then I would thank myself (in sign language) for the tough love.

 

[Section10]

If I ever said "ah" in a restaurant, I would pull my own tongue out, stab it repeatedly with a fork, and cut it off with a dull butterknife. Then I would thank myself (in sign language) for the tough love.

Don't be so hard on yourself. You're really not that bad of a guy.

 

[Panamabob]

I have a 3 year old and guess what...she doesn't listen to me. She doesn't listen to her mother. Today on the phone her godfather told her to eat her lunch and she hid behind the chair. She's a kid. She's 3. I don't want her to associate anything with a beating. She doesn't like time-out and that is good enough so far.

As a teacher, I think, I let a lot go...why?:
1) I'm used to the noise.
2) Kids generally mean no harm, especially the younger ones.
3) They don't have the capacity to know better until they are older.


Now, when I teach Junior High I sure don't allow any bull, but they know better and the kids in Indiana, for now, are generally smart enough to play by the rules. I can't speak for other places.

 

[Senator Jack]

Kids these days. They'll slit yer throat if they thought it would get 'em to the next level of a video game.


Senator Jack (being cynical tonight)

 

[Solomon Kane]

Holy Bible

What is this?

You probably would not understand.

 

[Solomon Kane]

Solomon,

The OT's covenant has been fulfilled with love.

Mar 9:42 And whosoever shall offend one of [these] little ones that believe in me, it is better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he were cast into the sea.

 

[Panamabob]

The covenant is fulfilled. It isn't simply a man who loves his children doing the punishment here.

 

[jamespowers]

Let me get this on a track that makes more sense than "I know better than you do."
Quite simply, I would expect the parent to do something to stop a child from being a nuisance in public. This can be done with a word, a look, a good talking to or other such means. Just letting them climb the walls seems to be more the point of contention. Do something to keep them in line seems to be the general consensus.
Lets not direct this thread to violence against each other eh? That solves nothing and does nothing for the argument.

Regards to all,


J

 

[PrettySquareGal]

Kids these days. They'll slit yer throat if they thought it would get 'em to the next level of a video game.


Senator Jack (being cynical tonight)

That about sums it up.

 

[Solomon Kane]

The covenant is fulfilled. It isn't simply a man who loves his children doing the punishment here.

The new covenant in no way renders the Old Testament irrelevant.

Mat 5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.


Mat 5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.

 

[shamus]

You probably would not understand.

I guess I don't understand the thing "I probably would not understand."

Perhaps you could explain this to me.

 

[Zach R.]

You people aren't serious about kids doing things because video games "told them to" are you?

There is NO substantial proof for any of these claims, and those that are out there focus on already disturbed children who weren't raised in the right manner in the first place and games were used as a scapegoat:
"Little Johnny who killed someone in 2005 played a violent video game in 1997, that must be what caused him to do it! Thank you for your enlightening wisdom, Jack Thompson, it couldn't have been the parents who didn't give a crap about him and locked him in a closet."

Which brings us back to the topic at hand.

 

[Zach R.]

I don't think the decline of good parenting wholly revolves around the lack of "whippings" or "beatings" either, if that was solely what made kids what they are today(or from times past) then who knows what it would be like.

 

[John in Covina]

There is a great difference between spanking or coporal punishment and truly being violent or torture. If a parent does the spanking when angry there is the chance that it will over step the "boundary" but when done to its best effect it get the attention and brings the concerns of the parent in full focus of the child.

It was and is an effective tool in the right hands (literally).

We never went nuts at a restaurant, because we knew if would be fatal to our ego to get spanked in front over a whole room of people. So a look or the flick to the top of the head was the gentle reminder of what was in store if you embarrased your parents.

Here is the thing, some parents don't know when to be embarrassed or what should embarasse them. When little Joey flings his food and silverware around so other tables have to duck, or little Mary is screetching like her toes are getting cut off, you should be embarressed by your children. And like it or not you owe the other people some semblence of serenity not a pack of wailing banshees, if you can't control your kids, then you are not allowed out of the house. Call in the psyciatrists psycologists or the wild animal experts, but control your kids.

 

[Senator Jack]

I don't know what to think any more. I know we heard the same bs when I was a juvenile delinquent, but I think kids really are brutalized by the world these days. And I mean that in the real Fowler's sense of the word and not the sense that journalists think it means (real sense: to make someone brutal : journalistic bastardized sense: to beat up) I recently watched Sin City with my nephews and was actually starting to get sick from all of the violence, just as I did when I first Texas Chainsaw Massacre some 25 years ago. But that violence didn't seem to bother them in the least. They're good kids - I can't see them ever as serial killers - but I can't believe that such grue didn't have any effect on them whatsoever. I hate to be that guy saying 'When I was a kid,' but I have to be that guy...

Regards,

Senator Jack

 

[maintcoder]

... So a look or the flick to the top of the head was the gentle reminder of what was in store if you embarrased your parents...

You too? My dad packed a mean 'thump' and could do it so quickly and secretly that only you and he knew it and man, did it get your attention to behave. If he could catch your eye, the look was stone cold sobering - if not, a thump brought you around and he choose his method wisely for those times when barking an order (he was a Command Sergeant Major) or taking other drastic measure (whipping off a belt) was inappropriate. It was control, mainly subtle and the key was we always KNEW what we had done to get the look, thump, scolding, etc. He was a fair man with set expectations that were very well known and understood. Play by the rules, and the world was wonderful. Break the rules and deal with the consequences (restriction, loss of privilege, extra chores, etc.) depending on the infraction.

 

[Lancealot]

The job of a parent is not to raise a child and be their buddy, but to grow and nuture a lady or a gentleman.


I think this is the main point here, more parents are worried about being there childrens pal than raising someone that espects themselves and others.

I work in retail and every day I see kids that have absolutly no respect for there parents themselves or anyone else. Nine times out of ten there parents turn a blind eye or act like it's completely normal. I'm not tlaking about young children that don't know better. I have three youg kids myself 7 and under, they don't act up they behave themselves they yes sir and yes ma'am. It's not because I spank them but because I've taught them to act with respect for themselves and other people.

My parents did spank me but to be honest I can only remeber one time it happened. What hurt me worse was when I felt I had let my parents down.

Just my 2 cents.

 

[Steve]

The job of a parent is not to raise a child and be their buddy, but to grow and nuture a lady or a gentleman.


I think this is the main point here, more parents are worried about being there childrens pal than raising someone that espects themselves and others.

I work in retail and every day I see kids that have absolutly no respect for there parents themselves or anyone else. Nine times out of ten there parents turn a blind eye or act like it's completely normal. I'm not tlaking about young children that don't know better. I have three youg kids myself 7 and under, they don't act up they behave themselves they yes sir and yes ma'am. It's not because I spank them but because I've taught them to act with respect for themselves and other people.

My parents did spank me but to be honest I can only remeber one time it happened. What hurt me worse was when I felt I had let my parents down.

Just my 2 cents.

Exactly my sentiment.

And I'd like to go on record to say that I am not trying to sway opinions or call people wrong. That was not my intent in making this thread. My intent was to express my distaste for the trend of parents not teaching their kids manners for public places, no matter what their chosen method.

[/repetition]

 

[Senator Jack]

Personally, when I'm out at a restaurant, I'd like to see the adults behave. Blathering on cell phones. Chewing with their mouths open. Sucking their teeth. Do you expect the kids to act any better?

Regards, a still cynical,
Senator Jack