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The Annual Affliction.

Lorne

One of the Regulars
Messages
239
Location
Boston
The lummox is here for two weeks vacation. Getting him to do his own laundry was a major a victory, as was his agreement not to wear his trilby in front of anyone his mother and I know.
 

Cattus Petasatus

One of the Regulars
Messages
250
Location
Richardson, TX
This is the best thread I've read in a long time.

When my youngest son moved back in with me after some poor choices on his part, i charged him $400 a month...to sleep on my couch. He was back out in 3 weeks. He grew up quick. Today we have a great relationship.

25 to life vs. 2 weeks? It's a no brainer, especially since there are trilby's involved. You can dig quietly, right?
 

Lorne

One of the Regulars
Messages
239
Location
Boston
Neighbors are elderly and as deaf as posts.

Two glasses of wine and the wife would sleep through artillery.

I feel a plan coming together here...

Even if I take the fall for this; as long as their is one juror with a adult child living in their basement or with a Stetson in the closet, I'll walk.

All of a sudden I'm feeling very film noir....
 
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Lorne

One of the Regulars
Messages
239
Location
Boston
Back when I was a cop, we used to say there three types of homicides:

Criminal;

Justifiable;

And Praise Worthy.

By the way, if someone reading this is a Massachusetts State Trooper, we are just joking around.

Unless you are a Trooper who owns a wood chipper, in which case I could use your help.
 

F. J.

One of the Regulars
Messages
221
Location
The Magnolia State
Back when I was a cop, we used to say there three types of homicides:

Criminal;

Justifiable;

And Praise Worthy.

By the way, if someone reading this is a Massachusetts State Trooper, we are just joking around.

Unless you are a Trooper who owns a wood chipper, in which case I could use your help.

^^^Now that's funny!:pound:
 
Messages
10,586
Location
Boston area
I have a friends (husband and wife) who executed a perfect plan to oust a boomerang son. After several months of nothing happening, no interviews, very few job applications, lots of couch time, and no promises on the horizon, they went into action. On a Saturday morning when the "tenant" would awake by mid-morning, they both came down to the kitchen naked. Totally naked. The look of complete and absolute horror on the son's face turned ever more aghast when my friend cheerily smiled a big "Good Morning," and then playfully slapped his wife's naked backside proclaiming, "Your Mom's just WILD!"

He was gone the next day.
 

Blackthorn

I'll Lock Up
Messages
4,568
Location
Oroville
Back when I was a cop, we used to say there three types of homicides:

Criminal;

Justifiable;

And Praise Worthy.

By the way, if someone reading this is a Massachusetts State Trooper, we are just joking around.

Unless you are a Trooper who owns a wood chipper, in which case I could use your help.
lollollollollollol:eusa_clap:eusa_clap:eusa_clap
 

LuvMyMan

I’ll Lock Up.
Messages
4,558
Location
Michigan
Absolutely epic thread.

I can see this coming up in my future, re one of my spouse's offspring. Except I'll move out first.
Oh lord...teach the little devil how to hot wire cars maybe they will get a long stay at the State Pen and merely become a Pen Pal? That or leave many books on Australia laying around and inspire and make them just DREAM of moving there then invest in a one way ticket.......
 

LuvMyMan

I’ll Lock Up.
Messages
4,558
Location
Michigan
A nice large Guard Dog could also be a possible aide in the matter.....(What happened to Ralphie...he was just sitting there a minute ago...and now only one shoe laying on the floor....)>..loL!
 

Stanley Doble

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,808
Location
Cobourg
Kidding aside, have you tried talking to him, or I should say listening, and finding out what he wants to do or what is the matter?
 

Lorne

One of the Regulars
Messages
239
Location
Boston
I wanted to keep you guys updated.

It’s been a very trying 24 hours.

My wife and I have a system. One night she gets to watch what she wants on our TV and the next night I choose.

Wednesday night was my night and I decided to watch the Maltese Falcon.

About 10 minutes in, the Hungry-Hungry Hippo comes downstairs to grace us with presence. First thing he does is ask to change the channel.

“No, we are watching the Maltese Falcon.” My wife gave me the “Lorne, don’t…” look.

He sits down and, just about the time Longstreet is telling Bogart he doesn’t trust a man who doesn’t drink, Magilla Gorilla says “ya know, I never liked Bogart.”

I don’t recall what happened after that (diminished capacity). At some point I think I had the brim of a trilby between my teeth, but in all honesty, it could have been an ear. First thing I remember clearly (I swear) is the darts from the officer’s Taser hitting me in the back.

The officer (a 7 ¼ who wears a Stetson Downs), was very understanding.

I’m sure, once we have put the legal aspects of this behind us, my wife and I will emerge with a stronger relationship.
 
Last edited:

LuvMyMan

I’ll Lock Up.
Messages
4,558
Location
Michigan
I wanted to keep you guys updated.

It’s been a very trying 24 hours.

My wife and I have a system. One night she gets to watch what she wants on our TV and the next night I choose.

Wednesday night was my night and I decided to watch the Maltese Falcon.

About 10 minutes in, the Hungry-Hungry Hippo comes downstairs to grace us with presence. First thing he does is ask to change the channel.

“No, we are watching the Maltese Falcon.” My wife gave me the “Lorne, don’t…” look.

He sits down and, just about the time Longstreet is telling Bogart he doesn’t trust a man who doesn’t drink, Magilla Gorilla says “ya know, I never liked Bogart.”

I don’t recall what happened after that (diminished capacity). At some point I think I had the brim of a trilby between my teeth, but in all honesty, it could have been an ear. First thing I remember clearly (I swear) is the darts from the officer’s Taser hitting me in the back.

The officer (a 7 ¼ who wears a Stetson Downs), was very understanding.

I’m sure, once we have put the legal aspects of this behind us, my wife and I will emerge with a stronger relationship.

I am totally un able to say who made the statement first...but...if it did not kill you, it can only make you stronger...(now I add to it..on my own)...and a LOT more ******.....as long as you and the woman you love are able to talk about what is ongoing...you will survive it....I know...when I can talk to my Husband about anything we need to talk about...it normally works out very well.


I like a few ideas from this thread...and LOVE mine about the Guard Dog.....lololololol
 

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