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So trivial, yet it really ticks you off.

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12,005
Location
Southern California
I can remember a time when you hardly ever saw anybody walking the streets with any kind of a beverage in their hand, and those rare occasions when you did, it was usually a kid with a soda. Now, suddenly, everyone has to venture out equipped with sufficient personal-hydration supplies for a Foreign Legionnaire on a death-march across the Libyan desert. Water bottles are, by far, the most common item in our lost and found box, and yet, I've never owned or used one, and I've never walked the street holding a coffee cup. What am I missing? Where did this trend come from?
In general, I believe it started when the grocery and convenience stores ramped up their efforts as far as selling bottled drinking water back in the 1970s because doctors suddenly decided we were all dehydrated. Even Robin Williams joked about it on his first comedy album "Reality ... What a Concept", saying "Whenever I spend a dollar on a bottle of water, I have Perrier," because the idea of paying for a bottle of water was still absurd.

I don't carry something to drink with me everywhere I go, but I regularly bring something and leave it in my car because decades ago my dentist told me I have an unusually dry mouth, and that it could be contributing to some of my dental issues. He suggested I drink more fluids to keep my mouth damp, so I have. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
 

Tiki Tom

My Mail is Forwarded Here
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Oahu, North Polynesia
^^^^^
As a fellow I’ve known since our teen year's offered just recently …

“When you see a men’s room, use it. When you get an erection, use it.”

In our youth we could be mocked for getting an involuntary erection at an inopportune time. Decades later we can be mocked for, at an inopportune time, not getting an involuntary erection. Such are life’s ups and downs.
 
Messages
12,005
Location
Southern California
In our youth we could be mocked for getting an involuntary erection at an inopportune time. Decades later we can be mocked for, at an inopportune time, not getting an involuntary erection. Such are life’s ups and downs.
A few decades ago Johnny Carson was interviewing an actress (Dyan Cannon maybe?) on The Tonight Show, and she had slightly over-indulged in the alcohol made available to the guests in the "green room" so she began telling stories about some of her male co-stars over the years. The subject of filming "love scenes" came up and she said her most memorable was with a very well known male actor, not because of what he did while filming but what he did before filming. She said he approached her and said, "Listen, I've done a few of these before and no one ever really knows how they're going to go. So I wanted to apologize in advance just in case I get aroused while we're shooting this scene. And I'd like to apologize in advance just in case I don't."
 
A few decades ago Johnny Carson was interviewing an actress (Dyan Cannon maybe?) on The Tonight Show, and she had slightly over-indulged in the alcohol made available to the guests in the "green room" so she began telling stories about some of her male co-stars over the years. The subject of filming "love scenes" came up and she said her most memorable was with a very well known male actor, not because of what he did while filming but what he did before filming. She said he approached her and said, "Listen, I've done a few of these before and no one ever really knows how they're going to go. So I wanted to apologize in advance just in case I get aroused while we're shooting this scene. And I'd like to apologize in advance just in case I don't."

I’ve heard it put “if I get aroused, I apologize. If I don’t, I’m sorry.”
 

GHT

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,775
Location
New Forest
^^^^^
As a fellow I’ve known since our teen year's offered just recently …

“When you see a men’s room, use it. When you get an erection, use it.”
Billy Connolly, advice on turning sixty:
"If you get the chance to take a leak, use it" "Never trust a fart." "If you get an erection, don't waste it. Even if you're by yourself."
"Listen, I've done a few of these before and no one ever really knows how they're going to go. So I wanted to apologize in advance just in case I get aroused while we're shooting this scene. And I'd like to apologize in advance just in case I don't."
Mae West is often quoted as saying: "Is that a pistol in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?" But in fact she ad-libbed it:

In 1944 the play “Catherine Was Great” which was produced by Michael Todd, and starred Mae West opened on Broadway. Cohn stated that West improvised the humorous line of dialogue when she was interacting with her fellow star Gene Barry: Barry, playing Lieutenant Bunin, was unaccustomed to carrying a sword, and in the second act, during an embrace, his scabbard came between him and his Empress.
A covert smile stole over Mae’s face. “Lieutenant,” she ad-libbed, with her trade mark Mae West leer, “is that your sword or are you just glad to see me?”
 
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10,930
Location
My mother's basement
I’ve mentioned before the guy in the house across the street, the guy who takes a casual approach to most everything having to do with home maintenance, the guy who, for instance, has had a several foot long section of siding missing from one gable end (the end facing my place) for years now.

He put up Christmas lights. How can you not love a guy like that?
 
It bothers me when a new construction project doesn't have a "coming soon" sign to identify what they are building. I think I like this even less. A "coming soon" sign for a ... new sign.

Evangel_Sign_Sign.JPG
 
Messages
12,005
Location
Southern California
^ Doctor Pastor President Rakes there seems happy about it. Maybe that's a good...sign. :D

By the way, how does that work when someone has so many professional titles before their name. Do you list them alphabetically, or shortest to longest, or whichever brings in the most money first, or...?
 

Turnip

My Mail is Forwarded Here
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3,349
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Europe
Reminds me on socialistic news broadcasts where the countdown of titles took sometimes longer than the news itself, especially when more than one person was involved and had to be mentioned.
 
Messages
10,832
Location
vancouver, canada
In our youth we could be mocked for getting an involuntary erection at an inopportune time. Decades later we can be mocked for, at an inopportune time, not getting an involuntary erection. Such are life’s ups and downs.
Larry Wilton....1966 on stage making his stump speech for school president while sporting an (involuntary?) erection. It was most evident and the girls in the audience were silent while the guys rolled in the aisles with laughter. The dude won the election because everyone remembered his name......there is a politcal lesson in there somewheres.
 
Messages
10,832
Location
vancouver, canada
Reminds me on socialistic news broadcasts where the countdown of titles took sometimes longer than the news itself, especially when more than one person was involved and had to be mentioned.
In a related note: My wife and I always watch as the credits run at the end of the movie. Last night I saw for the first time following the "First assistant wardrobe istress" was the title of "Covid Runner". No idea what the role entailed but there it was. Perhaps running the covid tests to the lab each morning?
 
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12,005
Location
Southern California
The Brits have made snobbery an art form. When you have a list of titles and qualifications longer than a tin pot dictator, you need Debretts.
Thank you for the link, but I was only curious. I don't want to have to pay to join up with anyone for that bit of trivial knowledge. ;)

Larry Wilton....1966 on stage making his stump speech for school president while sporting an (involuntary?) erection. It was most evident and the girls in the audience were silent while the guys rolled in the aisles with laughter. The dude won the election because everyone remembered his name......there is a politcal lesson in there somewheres.
You never know. One of my high school classmates was so well endowed that everyone at school knew about it; a local legend, you might say. *shrug* Nothing he could do about it, and he said his attempts to try to hide or disguise it just made things worse. A lot of the female students considered him to be a rather good-looking guy, but he was socially awkward and shy because of his "handicap". Nice guy, good sense of humor, intelligent, but...the grass is always greener.
 

Tiki Tom

My Mail is Forwarded Here
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3,393
Location
Oahu, North Polynesia
A lot of the female students considered him to be a rather good-looking guy, but he was socially awkward and shy because of his "handicap".

And then there is the whole circumcision thing. I remember a sports coach having to give a lecture to the team that so-and-so was not a freak and that we had all better drop the subject. I think today’s young men are probably more knowledgeable (and more sympathetic) than we were, back in the dark ages.
 

GHT

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,775
Location
New Forest
That reminds me of Idi Amin, who styled himself "His Excellency, President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hajj Doctor Idi Amin Dada, VC, DSO, MC, Lord of all the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Sea and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular."
Idi Amin.jpg

It's worth noting that even Idi Amin realised there was a limit to the respect one can garner for being Lord of the Fish, and he went on to found a local university to make him a doctor, (of law of course.) It's likely Idi Amin collected these odd titles to reinforce his image as one of a buffoon, thus distracting the world from the killing of his own people.
 

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