Phooey!

[Caledonia]

Good point Pilgrim. If you look at the long term perspective things seem just to repeat, not really better or worse, just packaged a little differently.

 

[Lady Day]

I dont want to give up on anybody, but I have to say the 'get them first before they get you' persona has a definite strangle hold.

Cant tell you how many times I have been pushed OUT of the way by someone who want to get on the bus before me. People who cut in line and know it, but will only, or maybe, retract their position if you bitch to them about it. People who think they should get special treatment because of who they are. I dont know who they are. They could be rich and think they deserve it, or poor and think so as well.

No one wants to take a brake and just look up from their feet at the faces around them and not assume anything bad. And no one wants to be considerate as in the cell phone thing. Its "Ill shut it off as soon as I get finished because I care about the rules only as long as I dont want to obey them becaue it inconveniences me."

Thats what turns my stomach, and most of the way things are set up today allow for it.

LD

 

[J. M. Stovall]

I had a similar experience on Wednesday evening. Went to a showing of Rebel Without a Cause at downtown L.A.'s Los Angeles Theatre, a 1931 movie palace that is very rarely opened for screenings. The gargantuan theater was packed with people ... and what a motley crew they were. Gabbing all through the show while spreading the joy of their bodily functions. Pushing, shoving. Oy vey!

.

Remember that whole "laser pointer at the screen" thing from about 10 years ago! Talk about ruining a movie. They had to post employees at the front facing the audience to try and catch them. I'm glad that "trend" died.

 

[SWTroopers]

Dear Senator, you are not alone by a long shot. I very rarely go to the theaters anymore for these very reasons. I remember one time having a ditz sitting behind me cracking her gum non-stop till I finally snapped and told her to cool it. She and her friends looked at me like I was completely looped. Never occurred to them that it might be rude. But, it had the desired effect

For me, the worst time is standing in a long line. I find I can put up with the nonsense in short spurts, but in long lines the rude behavior just grates on me, and how.

Some could call it being a sociophobe, but I'll call them on that as I enjoy socializing and meeting new people. It just that it has to be a certain class of people. Maybe I'm just an elitist snob? I can live with it.

Marc

 

[Senator Jack]

Paisley wrote:
...you're not going to have the time of your life every time you go out.

Actually, I kind of do see it that way. Even if I'm just going to the bar for happy hour, I really do see it as being out. Perhaps the problem is that most of society doesn't see going out 'going out' and that's why we have poorly dressed diners at top-dollar restaurants. (see my archives over at The Fedora Chronicles for more on this.)

Okay, getting back to my original point. The therapy. If this is the way society chooses to function as a whole now, and if my idealism is now precluding function within this society, obviously I have to question my own sanity. And this has nothing to do with pining for the ideals of another era, or having a penchant for its suits or cars, it just has to do with misanthropy. Yeah, I was born a curmudgeon, but at least I was able to function. I fear that I no longer can. People offend me. I may need help.


Regards,

Senator Jack

 

[Lady Day]

Actually, I kind of do see it that way. Even if I'm just going to the bar for happy hour, I really do see it as being out. Perhaps the problem is that most of society doesn't see going out 'going out' and that's why we have poorly dressed diners at top-dollar restaurants. (see my archives over at The Fedora Chronicles for more on this.)

Okay, getting back to my original point. The therapy. If this is the way society chooses to function as a whole now, and if my idealism is now precluding function within this society, obviously I have to question my own sanity. And this has nothing to do with pining for the ideals of another era, or having a penchant for its suits or cars, it just has to do with misanthropy. Yeah, I was born a curmudgeon, but at least I was able to function. I fear that I no longer can. People offend me. I may need help.


Regards,

Senator Jack

If you need help get it. There was a time (two years ago) where I had a brake down and couldnt leave my apt for 5 days. I slept the entire time. People were worried. I hated going out, and taking to people made my stomach turn.

II was diagnosed with severe manic depression, and my Dr. put me on medication, saved my life. I can function now, and I feel stable.

So if you feel you need it, then by all means, dont put yourself in a bad place and fester. Go get/ask for help.

LD

 

[Sefton]

I'm sorry to hear that modern life is driving you to therapy Senator Jack. It's tough to take people some (o.k., most) times.

Recently I attended a two week festival of the films of Boris Karloff in San Francisco at an old movie theater. Now maybe it was because of the films being of such a vintage (mostly 30s) that the audience was mostly better dressed and behaved. Yes, a few times cell phones went off, once a woman brought two young children who made noise. One thing that did bother me were the people who bring paper bags which they seem to incessantly be opening and closing to get out food! If you want to go on a picnic go to the park!

Marc is right, I believe, about location. I go to Japan every year and have been to movies and concerts there and it is such a contrast! People are well behaved and keep their kids quiet. Even more people use cell phones there but with one major difference; you almost never hear them using them to talk on trains. It's all text messages. If someone does talk people look at them like they are doing something very rude. If only it were that way here...

Going out can be a challenge to ones sanity. The only people that I know of who dress up for movies and dining are the ones who post here...San Francisco used to be known as the Paris of the west coast. The people took pride in their city and in their dress. This is what's told to me by my parents and others. It's sad that it had to end. I'm sorry to keep hearing the same about New York. This thread reminds me of Anthony Hopkins in the sequel to Silence of the Lambs where a male nurse who befriended him explains that Lecter claimed to only kill the rude in society. He called them "Free Range Rude"! lol Sorry, strayed a bit fftopic:

 

[Brad Bowers]

Well, we gripe enough about here, but I'm wondering who else has had it - I mean REALLY had it - with the 21st Century. I walk down the street and I can't stand to even look at people any more. They're starting to turn my stomach. Standing in line at the bank and market and riding the subway are torture because of the proximity. I'm unsure if I can eat at restaurants any more. I know I've always been at the precipice of madness, but now I fear that terra firma is about to shift.

So the question of the day is: Anyone else feel like they need some serious therapy at this point?

Regards,

Senator Jack

Oh, man, I thought I was the only one thinking this. I've been worried about my mental state, as I've been thinking the exact same thing lately. I figure something's wrong with me, right?

Brad

 

[Feraud]

So the question of the day is: Anyone else feel like they need some serious therapy at this point?

Regards,

Senator Jack

Sign me up for a therapy sessions! My disdain for fellow citizens grows with each passing day. In particular are the complete morons I have to share the road with. Has New York State stopped giving tests for the privilege of driving?? I cannot believe the utter lack of common sense in my fellow New Yorkers. Going out to the movies or for a drink has become such a hassle.
It is hard to keep a positive attitude in a city of 8-9 million people, each more impassive than the next.

I figure something's wrong with me, right?

Brad

It is not you Brad!

 

[The Reno Kid]

I agree with you Senator. However, therapy is just a little too 21st century to be a viable solution. Might I suggest a good bottle of gin?

But seriously, I find myself really not wanting to be around people very much. They're a fairly unappetizing proposition for the most part. And I don't believe for a second that people are the same as they were back in the day. Sure, we all look back through rose-colored glasses. Lord knows the world we think of as the golden era had plenty of problems. But I really believe the world changed fundamentally about forty years ago (although it probably was set into motion by WWII and its aftermath). For the most part, before about 1965 or so, everyone had more or less the same sense of right and wrong. The same conception of propriety and decorum. Then we all just sort of went our separate ways. We have lost our sense of community--the feeling that we're all in this together. They certainly weren't perfect, but they're not called the good old days for nothing.

I try in my own small way to help by holding myself to a higher standard than is generally observed. Maybe if enough of us do that, we can make a difference. I hope.

 

[VintageJess]

I try in my own small way to help by holding myself to a higher standard than is generally observed. Maybe if enough of us do that, we can make a difference. I hope.

:eusa_clap I agree, Reno. I suppose all we can do is to try to lead by example and teach our children a better way.

 

[Dixon Cannon]

Quoth John Lennon...

"I want to save humanity, it's people I just can't stand."

It does seem to be true though, doesn't it? A friend of mine has a theory; evolution isn't necessarily ever moving forward, but like the tides, moves in waves - forward than backward - progressing than regressing. We happen to be in a devolutionary period where many of the proven values seem to be losing value. But those same attitudes become the triggers that motivate the next evolutionary cycle, as people insist on something better.

I too look around my neighborhood and around my town and it seems all I see are nare-do-wells and raggedy people who have lost all sense of self-esteem. My girlfriend and I talk of it often. It can become depressing if you dwell on it and that's all you see. One really has to look beyond it and hold their head up high in hope of better days.

I do have a particular beef though: Why is it that shop-keepers and store managers cannot keep there front walks and pavements clean and debris free? When I was a kid working at a big grocery store, we washed down and cleaned the sidewalks out front once a week. We scraped the gum and scrubbed the stains. These days no one even picks up the litter! It's amazing to me that one must walk through gum, food, cigarettes, goo, pigeon-poop, diapers, condoms and spit just to get to the merchandise to spend money. If you do mention the dirt outside all you can expect is strange look and a patronizing dismissal. I just don't get it. Who wants to be surrounded by such filth?... and why? :rage:

All we can do is be the example and hope we live long enough to see the shift in human consciousness.

-dixon cannon

 

[Matthew Dalton]

"He appears mad indeed but to a few, because the majority is infected with the same disease." - Horace

I can relate to these feelings. I took action to rid myself of them not so long ago.

Do many of the people here offend you Senator Jack? We're all part of society also, look around this forum and you'll find genuinely fantastic people I think.

Perhaps sometimes we have to remember that great people aren't all vintage-clad and do exist outside of the internet. They may be a minority but I think they're still around if you look hard enough. If you do find them, the jerks will probably matter less and less.

As for therapy, if one feels they could benefit from it I believe they should go for it. Anger is poison for the soul. Being entirely sane doesn't appeal to me either, as then one would probably have to act like everyone else. I'd rather be more like an "Elwood P. Dowd" but with less alcohol.

 

[Robert Conway]

I'm with you on the whole movie theater issue.

I've had people take calls and have a conversation out loud in the middle of the movie.

The running commentary from the arm chair movie critic sitting behind you.

People sitting in the theater talking about their friends and work for the length of the picture.

Gangbangers doing anything they please to do.

Laser-pointers.

Screaming kids.

Body oder.

Feet up on the back of the chair next to you. And I mean feet because a whole section of the population has mistaken their shower shoes for actual footwear.

1/2 hour of commercials before the show.

Chairs that were designed for midgets.

Yes, it's a disaster alright.

I try to avoid mainstream theaters, which is pretty easy, because the vast majority of new releases are a waste of time. Here in L.A. I like to go to the Archlight theater in Hollywood. Tickets are $14 bucks and up, which tends to keep the riff raff out and I have yet to see someone get out of line during a show, probably out of fear of being lynched by their fellow moviegoers, who have come to the Arclight to avoid that exact behavior. The only problem is that traffic in L.A. has become so bad, that driving to the Arclight is a nightmare in it self...

One of these days when HDTV DLP projectors become affordable I'll set up a small theater in my own place. Then I can invite some friends over or enjoy a picture on my own in peace and quiet.

But it does bother me that going to the cinema has become such a source of aggravation, because I REALLY like going to a theater and watching a good film with a crowd. And I'll probably never own a home that could hold a 40ft screen...

But yes, people are ruder and more obnoxious than ever, especially in our big cities.

 

[Senator Jack]

Asked by Matthew Dalton:
Do many of the people here offend you Senator Jack? We're all part of society also...

Jeepers, I was under presumption that you're all as mad as I am.

Expressed by Brad Bowers:
Oh, man, I thought I was the only one thinking this. I've been worried about my mental state, as I've been thinking the exact same thing lately. I figure something's wrong with me, right?

Again, Brad has proven that we are one and the same curmudgeon, somehow split and working at opposite sides of the country. I believe if the two of us should ever meet, the universe will explode.

Up to a few years ago, I did have this cynical contempt for people and I thought that normal; as we discussed in that thread a few months back, I believe it's perfectly okay to not like people. But now it's something different. I don't hate them. I'm just revolted by their very appearance and demeanor, and it's got to a point where I not only can't ignore them, but my focus is drawn to them. So if I'm at a restaurant and the guy next to me has his flip-flops on (yes, the flip-flops again) then I'm only thinking about the flip-flops. Maybe I'll feel better when summer's over.

Here's a good one for the theatre too. I got stuck sitting next to the guy who laughs at everything - and I mean EVERYTHING - even though nothing funny is happening. A guy gets in a cab - 'Hah, Hah.' 'Two root beers, please' - 'Hah, hah.' This guy was just laughing for the sake of laughing. I sat there thinking, 'It should really be impossible to ruin a comedy by laughing, but somehow - SOMEHOW - this guy's done it.'

Regards,

Senator Jack

 

[koopkooper]

Yeah it's sad that the movie going experience has been ruined by bad manners.
I once lost it completly at the movies when a guy behind me sat talking on his phone for 10 minutes despite the fact that people were complaining shuuuuuuush!!! I couldn't handle my anger anymore and simply stood up and threw my coke at his face "thanks for ruining the film ya bum" I said and walked out of the theatre.I half expected him to follow me with his buddies...but guess what they were so shocked they just sat there.
To this day I wonder if I received applause but I think hanging around would have been a bit silly.

 

[PutALidOnIt]

It's not restricted to the theater

I agree with the esteemed senator and this thread's worthy constituents; cold, rude, selfish people are more prevalent now than in the so-called "me generation" of a couple of decades ago. I have my own nudges about certain topics of behavior, but have never felt that I was the one who required "a check up from the neck up"!

Example:
I was in the checkout line a the grocery store a couple of weeks ago, when an attractive woman, probably in her late thirties smiled at me while placing her groceries on the conveyor. I didn't think anything of it, and returned a cordial smile.
She: "So, how are you today?". She was looking me straight in the eye.
I thought for a moment and said "Great, how are you?".
She: "I just got back from getting the boys' hair cuts."
I paused, and wondered why that should matter to me. She turned again to place some more groceries on the conveyor.
I: "Uh, OK".
She: "God, I hate having to shop at this time of day, don't you? It's such a pain!"
I: "Yeah, I know. But, this is the only convenient time for me".
She: "Well, I just want to get through this line and get Bobby to soccer practice".
I: "Uh, OK, have a nice day!"
She: "Listen mom, I gotta get off the phone and get outta here. Seeya tonight".

As she turned I saw that she had one of those tiny earpiece-type receivers, hidden by her hair, and was actually talking to her mother the entire time, while looking at me - probably thinking I was the one who was crazy, or a perv, or ??? :rage: Anyway, I find that, even in a public place, that such behavior is at the very least a discourtesy, and to a degree, a thoughtless encroachment of my space.

Well, this was just a semi-related anecdote from one who thinks that simple courtesies take negligible time and effort relative to the comfort and satisfaction of being just a bit more civilized than the norm. :fedora:

 

[Caledonia]

I get the feeling there is a "rage" starting to boil here ( I don't mean here, our esteemed FL), I mean (thinks), anarchy!, chaos theory! Are there too many of us to let us all exist without having to shimmy up against people we would avoid. In nature animals don't cohabit with other animals they can't stand. Are we overpopulating and what we're expressing here is the subtle beginnings of a special (that should read like species with ial at the end) dynamic that will eventually explode, or implode, one or t'other. There's still a lot of room on the planet, but we push ourselves into cities and towns (the rural population is still low enough not to be affected - third world dynamics aside for another discussion) until we can't move for bumping into people, and yet we're all more alone than we've ever been. Community is disintegrating, we've got to deliberately use words like "engage", "inclusion". It's going to pot my friends!

 

[PutALidOnIt]

All good points, Caledonia!

I agree with your sentiments entirely, except I sense more simple disgust than seething rage. I'm quite the laissez faire type. But, I also believe that being an a public area offers certain freedoms as well as certain responsibilities; I further believe that we cannot legislate courtesy, good manners, etc. Political correctness aside, I think that any event for which one has paid admission, especially entertainment, has protocol that requires some civility.

If I were the proprietor of a cinema, I would sooner have an usher escort the offensively behaving customer to the lobby for a refund rather than lose several future customers who are quietly enjoying a film. (Rocky Horror Picture Show and other participatory events excluded, of course!)

If a picture is a good comedy, I expect to hear laughter.
If a picture is action or horror, etc., I expect some "eeks" and "aagghhs"
If it's a Disney animal film, I expect "awwww".
What I don't pay for at the cinema is some mallrat behind me yakking away on her Cingular, "Oh my god Tiffany, like, you have got to see this picture! Brad is just so hot! You have to, like, get down here and see this...I'll TM you with more, like, right after I call Britney and Morgan and Megan and Justin...!"

I'd go on, but I'm on my way out to see "Dead Man's Chest"

 

[Brad Bowers]

Again, Brad has proven that we are one and the same curmudgeon, somehow split and working at opposite sides of the country. I believe if the two of us should ever meet, the universe will explode.

Or else peace, harmony, and comportment will be restored to the universe, with cocktails all around! lol I have to get to NYC one of these days, no question about it.

It's that urge to stand on a street corner and rail against the slobbery and poor manners of Americans that I must fight, for I must remain dignified, even in defeat.

Brad