How to handle yard/estate sale thugs?

[PrettySquareGal]

I'm tired of it. It's so discouraging. I understand I am competing with full time ebayers or dealers to get the treasures. I know some people do it full time and not getting enough vintage widgets (that's what it is to them) means not enough food on the table. But I've had it with those that literally push, shove, blow smoke in your face, block, whatever tactics they employ to keep me away from the goods.

Yesterday an old woman at a sale told me she had more things in her car and invited me to come look before she brought them out (it was a multi-family sale). Suddenly a woman rushed to the car and stood in front of me. I asked her, politely, if she was waiting to see things, too and she ignored me. (I wondered if maybe she was a relative/helper). She ended up telling the old lady that she would buy it all (!) before I could even look.

"You know you cut right in front of me," I said. And that was it. What more could I do? get into a brawl?

This is not unusual behavior. First come, first served, right? No. The most obnoxious, overbearing, pushy person wins most times it seems.

Is it like this where you are?

 

[freebird]

I'm tired of it. It's so discouraging. I understand I am competing with full time ebayers or dealers to get the treasures. I know some people do it full time and not getting enough vintage widgets (that's what it is to them) means not enough food on the table. But I've had it with those that literally push, shove, blow smoke in your face, block, whatever tactics they employ to keep me away from the goods.

Yesterday an old woman at a sale told me she had more things in her car and invited me to come look before she brought them out (it was a multi-family sale). Suddenly a woman rushed to the car and stood in front of me. I asked her, politely, if she was waiting to see things, too and she ignored me. (I wondered if maybe she was a relative/helper). She ended up telling the old lady that she would buy it all (!) before I could even look.

"You know you cut right in front of me," I said. And that was it. What more could I do? get into a brawl?

This is not unusual behavior. First come, first served, right? No. The most obnoxious, overbearing, pushy person wins most times it seems.

Is it like this where you are?

Sort of, just not that bad(yet). The lady should've told her that she would let you have the first shot at anything in the car, since she had made the offer to you first. That's usually how it's handled here. Most of the dealers make the sales early,so if one can get there right at opening time, then one stands a better chance of finding something.

Although not a vintage item, I picked up a heavy Pendleton blanket coat the other day. Dad looked at it first, and I was elsewhere. While Dad came to tell me about it, some other people drove up, looked it over good and hung it back as if they didn't want it (as Dad had). They then went to look at something else and since we were finished shopping I went and looked it over, tried it on and decided to purchase it. The other folks acted like they were kind of sore that I had bought it, but if they put it down then it's fair game. Sometimes to keep from carrying an item around, I ask the seller to hold the items for me near where they are, or as Dad puts it "start a pile" of stuff to purchase, that way you don't lose something that you want but cannot carry. This works at flea markets as well.

 

[PrettySquareGal]

I always show up early, and bring a bag or box to keep my "pile."My husband often accompanies me to stand "guard." But when we are all early, being there first doesn't always matter when people are acting like it's a war.

I agree the lady should have told the woman I was there first, but she didn't.

 

[freebird]

Maybe that differant parts of the U.S.people behave differently, or partly because I'm in a rural community. [huh] Either way, I'm also interested to see how others handle this.

 

[scotrace]

I have not even seen an estate sale in my area for years. There are several very competitive auctioneers and every estate is disposed of that way. So I'm no help!

 

[TheDutchess]

Maybe that differant parts of the U.S.people behave differently, or partly because I'm in a rural community. [huh] Either way, I'm also interested to see how others handle this.

I think that's the case, I have been to many sales like that and I have never seen that happen. I'm pretty soft spoken and polite but if she did that to me I would probably get rite feisty with her. Her behavior sounds so childish I wouldn't have an issue reprimanding her like a child. I have a HUGE pet peeve with adults that lack home training.

 

[ShortClara]

I was purposefully and literally shoved to the ground by a man once at a sale. He looked at me angrily because I dared to be there and shoved me hard on my shoulder and I landed with a thud on my backside. Any person who throws another person to the ground (and, especially, a much smaller woman - the guy was huge - it would not have happened if I had been a male person his size) isn't going to be cured by having something said to him. I was flabbergasted. I just dropped what I had and left. This is the state of modern society? Yes, apparently.

I am a pretty stubborn person, so short of said assault I will just smile real big and stand my ground to anyone.

 

[freebird]

I was purposefully and literally shoved to the ground by a man once at a sale. He looked at me angrily because I dared to be there and shoved me hard on my shoulder and I landed with a thud on my backside. Any person who throws another person to the ground (and, especially, a much smaller woman - the guy was huge - it would not have happened if I had been a male person his size) isn't going to be cured by having something said to him. I was flabbergasted. I just dropped what I had and left. This is the state of modern society? Yes, apparently.

I am a pretty stubborn person, so short of said assault I will just smile real big and stand my ground to anyone.

Ya know, if I had been in your shoes I would've dialed the cops and filed an assault charge. People shouldn't be allowed to get away with such behavior.

fftopic:

Different circumstance, but I was working a renn fair as a parking lot attendant, and an elderly "gentleman" had to drive down an access road to get to his property,which he didn't like. He would speed up and down the road, not caring that there were school children present, so I stationed myself at the entrance of the access road after he had left for town.

I saw him coming and moved to the side of the road, he deliberately drove toward me and very nearly ran into me. It was less than an inch between my knees and his bumper when he came to a stop....in the ditch I stepped into to avoid being a casualty He got out, shoved me around a bit, and only left after the police were called to the scene....there were several witnesses in costume and not. The police wouldn't file a complaint, so I had to place him under citizens arrest,sign complaints etc.

To make a long story short, the DA threw the case out, said that a 80 year old man being arrested for running down a 30 something wouldn't go very far. I suspect he knew the fellow's family,which is one of those things you run into in small town Oklahoma.

 

[Lulu-in-Ny]

If it makes you feel any better, it's the same thing in retail. I see this sort of behavior every day at my store. I believe it stems from an overripe sense of entitlement. We're living in a "me first" generation, and the bad news is, they're teaching their children to behave in exactly the same manner.

 

[BegintheBeguine]

This thread is distressing.

I get pushed, but not knocked down, as I'm unlocking the doors to the public library.
Buncha jerks. Don't they realize I can look up their names?
I don't know what to do about thugs, except to realize that they're very pathetic, bitter, horrible people who will probably have everything bad happen to them.
My mom deals in vintage costume jewelry and won't go to yard or estate sales anymore. Nice dealers all buy from each other, anyway!

 

[PrettySquareGal]

There was a garage sale, a few weeks ago, and I was looking at something. A very large man shoved his way behind me, and there wasn't enough room for him to pass me, so he pretty much pushed me forward into the table with his large gut. "Excuse me!" I said and walked away. He began to argue with the lady having the sale- he wanted to buy something he saw that wasn't for sale!

 

[PrettySquareGal]

I was purposefully and literally shoved to the ground by a man once at a sale. He looked at me angrily because I dared to be there and shoved me hard on my shoulder and I landed with a thud on my backside. Any person who throws another person to the ground (and, especially, a much smaller woman - the guy was huge - it would not have happened if I had been a male person his size) isn't going to be cured by having something said to him. I was flabbergasted. I just dropped what I had and left. This is the state of modern society? Yes, apparently.

I am a pretty stubborn person, so short of said assault I will just smile real big and stand my ground to anyone.

I am so sorry that happened to you. I want to start an all broad yard sale posse.

 

[PrettySquareGal]

I get pushed, but not knocked down, as I'm unlocking the doors to the public library.
Buncha jerks. Don't they realize I can look up their names?
I don't know what to do about thugs, except to realize that they're very pathetic, bitter, horrible people who will probably have everything bad happen to them.
My mom deals in vintage costume jewelry and won't go to yard or estate sales anymore. Nice dealers all buy from each other, anyway!

I have met some really nice dealers in my travels. I would hate to give up going to sales, though!

 

[PrettySquareGal]

If it makes you feel any better, it's the same thing in retail. I see this sort of behavior every day at my store. I believe it stems from an overripe sense of entitlement. We're living in a "me first" generation, and the bad news is, they're teaching their children to behave in exactly the same manner.

Yes, I agree.

 

[SGT Rocket]

Wow, that totally sucks. I hate it when people are rude. If people were more polite and had better manners, we would need fewer laws.

Anyway, not sure what you can do about it. My wife and I were in Baby's R Us the other day, fftopic: , and a lady cut right in front of us. I said to my wife, loud enough for the person to hear, "boy, people sure are rude here, they just cut right in front of you." Not to mention she had a cart full of stuff and my wife and I only had two items.

Sometimes people just suck. It usually means they are unhappy with themselves/life, or something.

 

[freebird]

Wow, that totally sucks. I hate it when people are rude. If people were more polite and had better manners, we would need fewer laws.

Anyway, not sure what you can do about it. My wife and I were in Baby's R Us the other day, fftopic: , and a lady cut right in front of us. I said to my wife, loud enough for the person to hear, "boy, people sure are rude here, they just cut right in front of you." Not to mention she had a cart full of stuff and my wife and I only had two items.

Sometimes people just suck. It usually means they are unhappy with themselves/life, or something.

fftopic:
So far most folks here will let a person with one or two items go ahead of them if they have a cart full of things. That's the upside to life in a rural community. The downside is that most are related to almost everyone else and they know everyone's business. When we moved here we were outsiders lol, until recently while doing Genealogy research I found that we are related to the others as well.

 

[Mike in Seattle]

I was purposefully and literally shoved to the ground by a man once at a sale. He looked at me angrily because I dared to be there and shoved me hard on my shoulder and I landed with a thud on my backside. Any person who throws another person to the ground (and, especially, a much smaller woman - the guy was huge - it would not have happened if I had been a male person his size) isn't going to be cured by having something said to him. I was flabbergasted. I just dropped what I had and left. This is the state of modern society? Yes, apparently.

I am a pretty stubborn person, so short of said assault I will just smile real big and stand my ground to anyone.

I'd have demanded anyone there call the cops because you wanted him arrested for assault and they'd all be called as witnesses in the lawsuit you'd be filing for your injuries. That's one way to clear out the crowds pretty quick ("Quick, Maude, run for the car - we don't wanna get involved in this!") and teach the bully a lesson.

 

[Nathan Flowers]

I go to estate/yard sales all the time around here, but have not run into any problem people.

However, I do have one nasty aunt that is similar to what you describe. She was once arrested for trespassing when she purposely dug through somebody's yard sale stuff at 5am before the sale even started. She was warned, and did it anyway. As we say in the south: "She's family, but we don't claim her."

 

[ShortClara]

I am so sorry that happened to you. I want to start an all broad yard sale posse.

HA! You just made me laugh out loud!! We are officially the first two members of the All Brassy Broad Yard Sale Posse (ABBYSP) - Deter us at your peril!

 

[PrettySquareGal]

HA! You just made me laugh out loud!! We are officially the first two members of the All Brassy Broad Yard Sale Posse (ABBYSP) - Deter us at your peril!

We need pink satin jackets with ABBYSP on the backs.