Gentlemen prefer...

[bunnyb.gal]

I was being facetious. I knew I wasn't going to have children in my teens, long before finances became something I thought about!

I find that saying it doesn't stop those sorts of assumptions and comments. I've had "But what if you change your mind?" - to which I responded "What if you do? Are you going to give him back?" and my doctor wouldn't refer me for tubal ligation because my marriage might fail and I might meet someone who wanted children...

I think I knew as soon as I found out where the little blighters came from! I'm with Edward on this one - I can appreciate intellectually why people would want to have one, but the thought of doing it myself gives me the screaming meemies!

I ran into that same brick wall, Puzzicato, and found the medical professionals' attitude toward my wishes incredibly offensive and patronizing. I only managed to get there in the end by digging my heels waaaaay in, undergoing councelling can you believe, and frankly, lying about my age. One of the best things I've ever done.

BinkieBaumont, please tell me that Joan Crawford pic has been Photoshopped...Please!

 

[Diamondback]

Going back to the original question to add to my list:

... a gal who doesn't believe in using the Friend Box Trap. Everybody wants the benefits, nobody's willing to deal with the cost of 'em. If you're gonna throw down this card, do it at first contact, don't denounce the tactic or claim not to understand it then throw it down later.

Shopgirl, I see nothing wrong with a gal making the first move either--as Vintage68 said, if the guy's an introvert throwing him a lifeline may be a bigger favor than you could realize!

 

[Puzzicato]

I had to fling myself at my husband because he never would have taken the hint. Some men are a bit slow that way.

 

[rumblefish]

I guess I just don't have that need to pass on my genetic material, and nature will wipe my genes out of the pool. [huh] Fine with me.

Funny.
I used to think the same way.

 

[Diamondback]

Guess what I'm saying with that last rant was, I prefer to be respected enough to be told what the score is going in rather than strung along. Sorry, two in a week has me burned out on that particular little dirty-trick...

Which brings us to another key point: if you don't respect each other enough to tell each other the truth right from Square One, it ain't gonna end well.

 

[davestlouis]

Lady Jessica, even the little girl I had the hots for in 2nd grade had curly red hair and freckles galore, so I guess my preference formed early. I wonder sometimes if I liked redheads initially, or liked her initially, which imprinted me with a taste for redheads?! Guess I'll never know.

I had another thought...I like interesting-looking women. I have never been fond of the high-maintenance "prom queen", I like women who are smart, might be a little nerdy or awkward, and aren't perfect physical specimens...
my wife claims I like ugly women, which I'm not sure how to respond to, given that she is among their number. I would argue that I don't care if a woman's nose is too big, or her behind is too big, etc.

Being happily married, I'm not looking,mind you, but when I look at avatars on this site, there are several women I'd like to meet...just to see what they're about.

 

[Richard Warren]

I find its better, if one is married, to prefer one's wife.

 

[HHISIII]

I find its better, if one is married, to prefer one's wife.

That sounds like pretty sage advice.

I'm a sucker for a foreign accent, mostly British or Russian (What can I say, I try to stick to ones with whom I can communicate), but intelligence is a very key factor. The current young woman I'm courting is a shrink...

 

[Vintage lover]

That sounds like pretty sage advice.

I'm a sucker for a foreign accent, mostly British or Russian (What can I say, I try to stick to ones with whom I can communicate), but intelligence is a very key factor. The current young woman I'm courting is a shrink...

Wont be able to hide much from her, especially emotion wise lol (believe me, I dated one)

 

[Edward]

I ran into that same brick wall, Puzzicato, and found the medical professionals' attitude toward my wishes incredibly offensive and patronizing. I only managed to get there in the end by digging my heels waaaaay in, undergoing councelling can you believe, and frankly, lying about my age. One of the best things I've ever done.

Yeah, I looked into getting a vasectomy on the NHS, only to be told that they won't do it if you don't have kids already. Absurd. I'll get it done privately eventually, though for now, well.... the cost of a new A2 seems a lot for something I'm not getting the benefit of. Why worry about whether your rifle is loaded with blanks or live rounds if you don't have the opportunity to go to the range, so to speak.

 

[HepKitty]

the story I got on why the doc wouldn't fix me after my kids were born is basically "well they're preemies and if something were to happen to one or both..." yeah. so I have yet to get fixed

 

[Tomasso]

after my kids were born

KIDS! I thought you were in High School! :eusa_doh:



Not that there's anything wrong with Mommys...........



In fact............

 

[shopgirl61]

lol this topic was not intended to bring up children, babies, vasectomy...
in case you haven't noticed.. I make no mention of my own offspring

Getting back on track, gentlemen, in times long ago a man would ask permission from the father for even 1 date as was the case of my parents.
one of my fav movies is Kate & Leopold 2001 w/ Meg Ryan and Hugh Jackman.

I found it utterly, intensely, irresistably, down right romantic and a HUGH-g turn-on that Leopold writes her a note asking to take her out for the evening.
risking rejection is a hard enough thing to do however I believe that nothing gained is nothing lost

I lived on an Air force base a few yrs and saw alot of men pairing up with asian women with the expectation's that they would 'wash their masters feet', not! Conversation, let alone being able to hold one, is a big key and i for one do not settle.. that easily.

 

[Puzzicato]

the story I got on why the doc wouldn't fix me after my kids were born is basically "well they're preemies and if something were to happen to one or both..." yeah. so I have yet to get fixed

Oh well obviously you need to be in good working order to replace one that breaks... What a horrible attitude - either that you can't make the decision yourself or that a baby is replaceable!

Another thing, slightly more on topic, that I have discovered, is that tastes can adapt over time as you become more in love with someone. I would have thought I wanted someone who gave me a lot of emotional and physical space and didn't cling, but the more I love my husband, the more I like him clinging to me!

 

[Paisley]

There's a great thread on the history of birth control in the Powder Room:

http://www.thefedoralounge.com/showthread.php?t=45014&highlight=birth

 

[SGT Rocket]

I don't get it...

I find that saying it doesn't stop those sorts of assumptions and comments. I've had "But what if you change your mind?" - to which I responded "What if you do? Are you going to give him back?" and my doctor wouldn't refer me for tubal ligation because my marriage might fail and I might meet someone who wanted children...

fftopic:
Ok, maybe it's late at night or something, or maybe I'm just dense. But, I don't get it. [huh]

You asked for a tubal ligation from your doctor (General Practitioner, I'm guessing), and he didn't refer you to a surgeon for it (a tubal ligation)?

I don't understand. Isn't that illegal or something? You want a procedure, why can't you just go out and get it? Can you go to another GP and get a referral from him? Or, can't you look up a practice that specializes in this procedure?

I've had male friends who have been sniped and female friends who have had their "tubes tied" and they didn't get any negative feedback from their doctors. It was like "you want it done, we'll do it."

 

[Hemingway Jones]

And on that bombshell.., good night ladies and gentlemen!