Best quotes - Merged thread - Keep it Clean! No dashes! No Symbols!

[DanielJones]

The sanity clause contract scene is my favorite from that one. "You can't fool me! There is no Sanity Clause!"

Cheers!

Dan

 

[Senator Jack]

"Why is it always the people who frazzle you who turn around and ask you why you're frazzled?"

Katherine hepburn to Spencer Tracey - Adam's Rib

And from The Thin Man

Reporter: Well, can't you tell us anything about the case?
Nick: Yes. It's putting me way behind in my drinking...


Regards,

Senator Jack

 

[Angelicious]

Most of my favourite quotes come from Casablanca.

Major Strasser: "What is your nationality?"
Rick: "Why, I'm a drunkard."

Rick, to Rainault: "When it comes to women, you're a true democrat."

Rick: "...Remember, I have this gun pointed straight at your heart."
Rainault: "That is my least vulnerable spot."

Rainault: "I am shocked - shocked! - to discover that gambling is going on here!"
Staff member: "Oh, sir, your winnings..."
Rainault: "Thank you, thank you very much."

Girl: "Could speak I to you for just a moment, please..."
Rick: "How'd you get in here? You're under age."
Girl: "I came with Captain Rainault."
Rick: "I should've known..."
Girl: "My husband is with me too."
Rick: "He is? Well, Cap'n Rainault's getting broad-minded, sit down."

 

[airfrogusmc]

Angelicious

You wore blue, the germans wore gray

There are so many great lines from that film.

One of my favorites. The Music Box theater in Chicago showed it a few years ago. Great to see it on the beg screen. Theres so much more shadow detail on film that you miss on a TV screen not to mention the big screen and the entire movie experience.

I also got a chance to see Citizen Kane there as well.

 

[rubyredlocks]

Mae West

It's not the men in my life that counts--it's the life in my men.

I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.

I like my clothes tight enough to show I'm a woman...but loose enough to show I'm a lady.

You ought to get out of those wet clothes...and into a dry martini.

 

[varga49]

G.Gordon Liddy
"Why is it there are so many more horses' asses than there are horses?"
"Obviously crime pays, or there'd be no crime."
"Defeat the fear of death and welcome the death of fear."

Dean Martin
"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."

 

[falcodriver]

With election season just around the corner:
"Politics may not be the oldest profession, but the results are the same" :cry:

 

[DanielJones]

"Wait master! It could be dangerous... You go first." - Igor (Young Frankenstein)

Cheers!

Dan

 

[Quigley Brown]

Finally got Turner Classic Movies on our cable system...yeah! First thing I watched was Citizen Kane. I haven't seen that in a long time. One quote I've never forgotten is by Bernstein when he is being interviewed by one of the newsreel guys...

Bernstein: Well, it's no trick to make a lot of money... if what you want to do is make a lot of money.

I also like this story he tells since I experience similar thoughts:

A fellow will remember a lot of things you wouldn't think he'd remember. You take me. One day, back in 1896, I was crossing over to Jersey on the ferry, and as we pulled out, there was another ferry pulling in, and on it there was a girl waiting to get off. A white dress she had on. She was carrying a white parasol. I only saw her for one second. She didn't see me at all, but I'll bet a month hasn't gone by since that I haven't thought of that girl.

 

[DanielJones]

A good one from De-Lovely...

"What is discretion but dishonesty dressed up in a little good breeding?"

Cheers!

Dan

 

[The Mad Hatter]

"If silicon had been a gas, I would have been a major general"

Painter James Whistler, who had been a West Point cadet in the 1840's but who flunked out after misidentifying silicon as a gas during a chemistry exam.

 

[Michael Mallory]

"If all the Vassar girls were laid end to end, I wouldn't be surprised."

Dorothy Parker.

 

[K.D. Lightner]

My favorite May Westies:

When I'm good, I'm very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better...

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted....

Admirer holding out Ms. West's hand: Goodness, what diamonds!
MW: Goodness had nothing to do with it.

MW to a crowd of male reporters in her room one evening: Boys, I'm tired tonight. One of you will have to go.

Reporter: Miss West, could you give us your opinion on foreign affairs.
MW: I've always had a weakness for foreign affairs

My favorite movies for quotes: Casablanca and also Gone With the Wind

Well, now I've done murder. I won't think about that; I'll think about that tomorrow....(Scarlett O'Hara, after shooting a Yankee looter)

Miss Scarlett, I don't know nuthin' 'bout birthin babies (Prissie, Butterfly McQueen)

Wizard of Oz has a few, too. My favorite is the Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas, anymore quote.

Dorothy Parker, while she didn't make movies, had some good lines:

When Calvin Coolidge died, she said, "How could they tell?"

A movie review: "Katherine Hepburn ran the emotional gambit from A to B."

When walking up to a door with Claire Booth Luce, Ms. Luce stepped aside and said, "Age before beauty." Parker wafted through the door and said, "Pearls before swine."

karol

 

[Angelicious]

My favourite Parkerisms:

"If all the girls from the Yale Prom were laid end to end - I wouldn't be surprised."

"If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to."

"Brevity is the soul of lingerie."

"This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force."

"The only ism Hollywood believes in is plagiarism."

"You can't teach an old dogma new tricks."

"Ducking for apples - change one letter and it's the story of my life."

"Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words."

"That woman speaks 18 languages and can't say "No" in any of them"

"I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be a darling at it."

"Look at him, a rhinestone in the rough."

"You can drag a horticulture, but you can't make her think."
on being challenged to use the word Horticulture in a sentence.

And my personal favourite:

"This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it."

 

[Angelicious]

I like quotes by the Great W. C. - Fields, that is...

"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it."

"I've been drunk only once in my life. But that lasted for twenty-three years."

"Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life."

"Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender."

"It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to."

"I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes."

"It was a woman who drove me to drink -- and, you know, I never even thanked her."

"Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water..."

"I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy."

"I'm looking for loopholes."
Said when caught reading the Bible.

"Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler."

Man: "I have no sympathy for a man who is intoxicated all the time."
WC: "A man who's intoxicated all the time doesn't need sympathy."

"I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food."

"What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?"

 

[Virgil Ante]

I couldn't pass this up, any chance to quote Yogi

"You can observe a lot just by watching."

"He must have made that before he died." -- Referring to a Steve McQueen movie.

"You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."

"You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six."

"Baseball is 90% mental -- the other half is physical."

"A nickel isn't worth a dime today."

"I always thought that record would stand until it was broken."

"The other teams could make trouble for us if they win."

"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."

"I didn't really say everything I said."

Oh yeah, this was supposed to be about movies, how about "We're going to need a bigger boat"

 

[K.D. Lightner]

Graffitti

Some of my favorite quotes were actually from Graffitti. It is said that Albee's play title, Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" came from graffitti.

My favorite graffitti:

Written in childish scrawl: I LIKE GRILS

Written in a new hand: IT'S SPELLED GIRLS, STUPID!

Written in first scrawl: ALLRIGHT, I LIKE GIRLS

Written in new hand: WHAT ABOUT US GRILS?

karol

 

[The Wolf]

if you combine Yogi Berra and old time movies, you get:

Samuel Goldwyn. He was known for his malapropisms.
http://www.cinerhama.com/jewish/goldwyn.html

Enjoy,
The Wolf

 

[VintageJess]

Hope you don't mind me chiming in late...

"People sleep peacefully in their beds at night because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf."

--George Orwell

 

[Burma Shave]

I'm glad you restarted this thing!

I somehow had missed this thread.

My favorites mostly come from Ambrose Bierce in The Devil's Dictionary:

"Belladonna, n. -- In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues."

and "Christian, n. -- One who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor."

and "Feast, n. -- A festival. A religious celebration usually signalized by gluttony and drunkenness, frequently in honor os some holy person distinguished for abstemiousness."

and "Politics, n. -- A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principlees. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage."

and lastly (for the purposes of this thread) "President, n. -- The leading figure in a small group of men of whom -- and of whom only -- it is positively known that immense numbers of their countrymen did not want any of them for President."