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Bad Table Manners

Cody Pendant

One of the Regulars
Messages
123
Location
Wild West Texas
Chupacabra's, salt and table manors! Oh my!

Talbot said:
I hosted some of them down under, and after the spiders, snakes, jellyfishes, and wildlife in general they left muttering something about Chupacabra's and not getting caught in Oak-cliff after dark. Another possible gaffe on my part?/QUOTE]

A gaffe, no, I think not. I think they are having a bit of good natured fun with you that is all. We would call it a ribbing. I certainly hope that Chupacabra's have not invaded down under, thats all you need, another vampiric critter!

As for the salt and mustard:

Talbot said:
I was taught that the 'correct' way to apply salt was to place a small pile on your plate and dip your food in it, as per the great mustard debacle. I have only seen very correct old timers do this, can anyone advise?

I will attempt to wade in on "salt, history and international etiquette".

My best answer to your question; from my perspective, is thus.
Your very correct old timers would have done this (salting the plate not the food) as a result of it was once very common to have a "salt cellar" on the table. That would be akin to the modern setting of a sugar bowl on the table. Thus the etiquette tradition having been set and logical use of it as per what you describe. The invention of the "salt shaker" while quite old, would be a relatively new invention. It allows the salt to be distributed onto the food in an even and controlled manor, replacing the older tradition of salting the plate, then the food. This of course could vary by country.

As for your mustard experience, I am aware that the English are fond of using it (i.e. Coleman's) as a side on their plate for beef. As your country is also a descendant of the British Empire, I would imagine that might be the origin of your use of it as well.

For example, it is said in America, to pass the salt and the pepper together. They are considered a married item. This is a very American idea, as in France I am told, it is acceptable to pass only which ever item was requested. Another difference I have heard it is polite to keep ones hands on the table in France, not so here.

As you have experienced, it is with great verity that acceptable manors are used and are dependent upon ones location. What goes here, may not be kosher there. As this is a global world now, it is quite a challenge to keep up with what one is to do, internationally.

I can only hope one day to visit your country and preform some of my own "gaffe's"

"Bon Appetit"
 

Cody Pendant

One of the Regulars
Messages
123
Location
Wild West Texas
Stem or stern?

Yes, it is correct to hold the glass by the stem. Not only to keep a chilled wine cold, but also not to get your fingerprints all over the glass. One must keep appearances up you know! We wouldn't want someone else to see your dirty glass and spoil their experience would we. :rolleyes:

If you hold a Champagne flute or a wineglass by the bowl your hands heat the drink inside. This would also cause the bubbles of the Champagne to flash off prematurely. The flute is designed to preserve the bubbles for as long as possible and concentrate the bouquet at your nose.

Cheers!
 

PrettySquareGal

I'll Lock Up
Messages
4,003
Location
New England
As a latch key kid I grew up eating dinner alone quite often, and it was Swanson's at that. (Hungry Man :) )So no, I didn't learn table manners at home. I am self-taught.
 

Foofoogal

Banned
Messages
4,884
Location
Vintage Land
:eek:fftopic:
Talbot, did you happen to go skeet hunting in Texas and did you catch any? ;)

Thank you Skeet.


In midst of moving and it flat will not quit raining in Arkansas.
 

Inusuit

A-List Customer
Messages
356
Location
Wyoming
Re: Mustard on the plate issue

Seems to me the only violation of "manners" was making a guest uncomfortable.
 

Talbot

One Too Many
Messages
1,855
Location
Melbourne Australia
Foofoogal said:
:eek:fftopic:
Talbot, did you happen to go skeet hunting in Texas and did you catch any? ;)

Thank you Skeet.


In midst of moving and it flat will not quit raining in Arkansas.

I was invited hunting, quite an honor I'm told. Unfortunately there really wasn't much time.

Besides, I hadn't brought my hunting boomerang along:rolleyes:

Send that rain down under, please
 

TheDutchess

One of the Regulars
Messages
209
Location
North Carolina
My grandmother's hammered them into me and there have been many of nights where I had to eat a cold dinner because I wouldn't sit at the table correctly. But I'm glad they did it because I couldn't imagine dining the way some people dine.
 

ShesSoVaVaVoom

One of the Regulars
Messages
187
Location
Munchkinland, Ca
as a latch-key kid I didn't learn table manners from Mom (who was always at work), also definately not from my older brothers who frequented 7-11 and the Pizza shop next to it for just about every meal.

Grandma did, however, let me know that:
1. we wait to eat until all are seated with plates
2. elbows OFF the table
3. the back of your hand is NOT a napkin :)eek: I know! haha)
4. chew your food with your mouth closed
5. slurping your drink is rude, if you run out of the beverage, excuse yourself to re-fill

there is definately more, those just stick out so much any time I catch company or coworkers breaking Grandmas rules it secretly makes me cringe.
 

Carlisle Blues

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,154
Location
Beautiful Horse Country
I was hoping that I could find a thread already established.

The situation is as follows: I meet bi-monthly with the men of the town where I live. We meet for dinner and breakfast.

The problem is one person eats with his fingers...I mean this guy puts his hairy paw in whatever appetizers that are available, puts it in his mouth then sucks his fingers. We all have to bring something for the meal. I love to cook..so I would prepare elaborate dishes.......NOT any more!!!! I bring pepperoni and cheese with toothpicks already stuck in each piece.

We all look at this guy with disgust...We have tried to drop hints, one person who is a professor started to discuss the history of the fork.

I am so grossed out by the finger licking and the lip smacking I now prepare a small plate at home in addition to the food I bring for the rest...and on breakfast day I eat at home and bring my own travel mug.....*yucky*

...lastly I shutter to think where his hands have been last and after he wipes his hands on his clothes I stare in disbelief...


Does anyone have an idea how to get the message to this guy??
 

23SkidooWithYou

Practically Family
Messages
533
Location
Pennsylvania
Carlisle Blues said:
Does anyone have an idea how to get the message to this guy??

The toothpick idea is pretty good.

There are some people who just don't get it and never will. I worked in a store with a person who had unbelievable BO. Now, I know this is sometimes medical and I didn't work directly with them so I relied on avoidance exclusively. I know the guys in his department would actually give him deoderant privately with a little manly "hey dude" sort of chat.

I might suggest you or someone do the same, but either he won't get it because he finds no fault with his manners, or he will be mortified. You are sort of in a no win situation.

Is there any chance somebody would play "host with the most" and actually have folks line up and be served as opposed to self serve?
 

23SkidooWithYou

Practically Family
Messages
533
Location
Pennsylvania
Bad Manners...a true story!

Date shows up, hair wet and in a pony tail wrapped by the type of rubberband you use on a bundle of mail, no tie.

Takes me to a fancy Italain place. We are greated by the little old lady at the coat check, where he promptly ditches me and runs back out to the car. (later found out it was because his GUN was in his coat pocket and no, he wasn't a cop) I give the lady my coat and he has his hung ON TOP of mine to save $. We are seated and the head waiter comes over and aks what time our reservation is for. Turns out we are an HOUR early! I offer to move to the bar but the waiter tells me so nicely that it's not a problem at all...then fires a few digs at the date. Menus arrive and the waiter is ready to take the order. Date literally asks which entree gives the biggest portion. Food arrives and he shovels his pasta into his mouth like he's using a backhoe. Then he asks if I'm going to eat mine and REACHES OVER THE TABLE AND TAKES IT FROM MY PLATE. On the way out, I am almost to the coat check when he spots his boss and his family. He leaves me standing there, goes back to the boss's table and spends 5 minutes conversing and never called me over or introduced me. (This is the same boss who forgot his wife's bday or anniversary or something so my date gave the boss flowers he bought for me. That's okay, but the date TOLD me about it!) By this time, I'm pretty sure tipping the little old coat check lady isn't going to happen...so the smallest I had was $10 and I just quietly slipped it in her basket as she handed us our coats. He put his on and headed for the door while I was still trying to get mine on.

I think he wanted to take me for a beer after that but I said I was exhausted and had to get up early for work. :rolleyes:

Romantic, no? lol
 

Carlisle Blues

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,154
Location
Beautiful Horse Country
23SkidooWithYou said:
The toothpick idea is pretty good.

There are some people who just don't get it and never will. I worked in a store with a person who had unbelievable BO. Now, I know this is sometimes medical and I didn't work directly with them so I relied on avoidance exclusively. I know the guys in his department would actually give him deoderant privately with a little manly "hey dude" sort of chat.

I might suggest you or someone do the same, but either he won't get it because he finds no fault with his manners, or he will be mortified. You are sort of in a no win situation.

Is there any chance somebody would play "host with the most" and actually have folks line up and be served as opposed to self serve?

When I approached the guy in the summer I was wearing my Montecristi he put his hand on the brim. He said he liked my hat..

It is a very "touchy" situation...


BO now that'll bring a tear to my eye......
 

ThesFlishThngs

One Too Many
Messages
1,007
Location
Oklahoma City
23Skidoo, you ARE going to assure us that was your last date ever with such a heel, aren't you? What a neanderthal.

Carlisle, I'd have to say something, either directly to the character, or perhaps have someone make a general announcement to the whole group, before anyone tucks into the food. A sensible notice about people understandably being concerned during the flu season (or whatever), so please won't every make a point of using the provided utensils when serving themselves?
After that, if his dips his mitts directly into the food, someone can jokingly speak up to him - "Didn't hear the rules, buddy? No germ sharing allowed today."
 

Carlisle Blues

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,154
Location
Beautiful Horse Country
ThesFlishThngs said:
23Skidoo, you ARE going to assure us that was your last date ever with such a heel, aren't you? What a neanderthal.

Carlisle, I'd have to say something, either directly to the character, or perhaps have someone make a general announcement to the whole group, before anyone tucks into the food. A sensible notice about people understandably being concerned during the flu season (or whatever), so please won't every make a point of using the provided utensils when serving themselves?
After that, if his dips his mitts directly into the food, someone can jokingly speak up to him - "Didn't hear the rules, buddy? No germ sharing allowed today."


23SkidooWithYou I am thinking that your date and this guy are one in the same.

The thing is I am at the point where I watch him like a hawk. I do not shake his hand. He put his hand out to me last Friday I said I sprained my thumb could not shake hands...lol I see that the others guys look as well. And I am not the only one who brings tooth picks.

We form lines to eat. I run up to the head of the line......I have no desire to stand behind this fellow who I call "Bigfoot".
 

Paisley

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,439
Location
Indianapolis
Maybe if someone took some photos of your next gathering, including photos of your friend eating and grooming himself, those photos might get the message across by themselves.
 

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