Bad Table Manners

[Marc Chevalier]

.

:rage:

This drives me nuts, and I see it all the time. People who are otherwise well mannered and well dressed plop themselves at a well appointed table and proceed to eat like barbarians. Utensils are used badly, if at all. Open-mouthed chewing? Of course. Food-filled mouths talking away? Naturally. Napkins left untouched on the table instead of placed on the lap? Sure. Loud cell phone rings and conversations? Obviously.


My mother hammered table manners into me. It was hard, but I'm grateful. Did your family teach and enforce table manners? Do you teach and enforce it with your children? Are you turned off by others' lack of table manners?


.

 

[Paisley]

No, they didn't. One Thanksgiving when I was 12, I threw a piece of turkey at my sister and it landed in her wine glass. Now, I sit down and eat properly, linen napkins and all (thanks to Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior, 1st ed.) even though I live alone.

Miss Manners has observed that the size and quantity of napkins provided by restaurants is in inverse proportion to the messiness of the food.

 

[avedwards]

Sometimes I ignore napkins, sometimes I remember to use them. But the rest I have been taught since I was old enough to eat for myself. Both of my parents have been very strict that we obey proper table manners (and manners in general).

However, despite trying to use proper etiquette myself, I am tolerant to others not using it to a certain extent, though I would draw a line somewhere.

 

[Fleur De Guerre]

My parents hammered it into me, and I hated it! I can remember saying many times, "But WHY do we have to hold our forks the right way/elbows off table/turn the TV off/use serviettes etc etc, when it's just us here?" and my mum would always say that it was because table manners were important and we'd be glad we had them later. Well, she was right! I have been to so many posh dinners with friends and they haven't had a clue. Doesn't remotely affect how I feel about my friends as that's not why they're my friends but often *they* were self conscious about it.

 

[bobalooba]

the cell phones bother me the most because they not only disrupt your table or those unfortunante enough to sit next to you but they disturb the entire restaraunt which is irritating if you are paying for a nice meal.

texting also bothers me in almost all aspects of life. There's nothing more irritating than someone carrying on a conversation with you while they text because you know they aren't really listening.

 

[Tomasso]

Sometimes I ignore napkins

Your clothing must be filthy.:eusa_doh:

 

[Shangas]

I must say that my parents were not particularly good in teachinig me table-manners. To begin with, they never bothered when I was a kid. Table-manners made their sudden and rude entrance into my life somewhere about the age of fifteen. All throughout my childhood I never knew what they were or how they were to be done, and all of a sudden I was expected to know everything at the drop of a hat. It was confusing, annoying and all I got was:

"You should KNOW this!"

No I don't. You never told me! It's like asking a plumber why he fixed the broken toilet upstairs but didn't tend to the leaking washing-machine downstairs when you didn't tell him about it.

 

[Viola]

It depends on what you mean by bad. Completely correct holding of forks is a different tier, to me, than not talking with food in your mouth or chewing with your mouth open.

I also really resent people who comment on other people's food. If you didn't order something I did, and you don't like what's on MY plate, silently congratulate yourself on your good judgment, don't blare "EWWW! JOSIE HOW CAN YOU EAT THAT IT LOOKS LIKE ROADKILL!" or whatever. That's why the good L-rd gave you an internal monologue. Write your noir first-person action novel in your head, if you want, but don't ruin my dinner.

 

[LizzieMaine]

We were sort of a combination -- we indulged in such things as the Boardinghouse Reach, and my grandfather habitually tucked his napkin into the front of his shirt, but my grandmother desperately tried to maintain a certain level of gentility in the proceedings -- use your napkin, don't talk with your mouth full, don't play with your food, don't slurp, don't throw scraps to the dog, don't read at the table, etc.

Since I've been single, my habits have gotten progressively sloppier. Right now there's a pile of books, a stack of bills, and assorted sewing scraps on my kitchen table, and I eat around these rather than trying to clear them off. But I don't talk with my mouth full, play with my food, or slurp. And if my cat wants scraps, she doesn't wait for me to throw them -- she just helps herself.

 

[Marc Chevalier]

It depends on what you mean by bad. Completely correct holding of forks is a different tier, to me, than not talking with food in your mouth or chewing with your mouth open.

Yes. I'm less irked by wrong fork holding, etc., than by chewing like a cow, etc.


.

 

[avedwards]

Your clothing must be filthy.:eusa_doh:

*checks clothes* Perfectly clean.

 

[Shangas]

I also really resent people who comment on other people's food. If you didn't order something I did, and you don't like what's on MY plate, silently congratulate yourself on your good judgment, don't blare "EWWW! JOSIE HOW CAN YOU EAT THAT IT LOOKS LIKE ROADKILL!" or whatever. That's why the good L-rd gave you an internal monologue. Write your noir first-person action novel in your head, if you want, but don't ruin my dinner.

"...I stared across the table at the brown lump and green gloopy stuff on her plate that looked like toothpaste mixed with freshly-cut grass. The brown lump looked like something you'd find lying on the ground in a park which someone pathetically tried to hide after an unashamed act carried out by their dog.

I watched her saw into it with her knife. She might as well have used a letter-opener. That steak was so tough she wouldn't get through it with a chainsaw. Slowly, she started mashing away at it like her teeth were so many steam-powered hammers, crushing the meat to mince to extract the goodness inside it. How the heck did she do that? I knew I'd never subject MY mouth to such torture. The green stuff was some sort of pureed vegetable sauce that barely resembled any vegetables that I knew, in whole or partially liquified form. Staring at this culinary monstrosity made me determined that next time, I'd pick where we went out for dinner. Perhaps a nice pizza-restaurant..."

I know one thing, if/when I have kids, I'll be drilling manners into them from the time they understand speech, so that they won't be left in my embarrassing position later in life.

 

[Viola]

Exactly, Shangas! Good one.

Me, though, my steak is always as red as the end of a lit cigarette, and if you listen closely you can still hear plaintive moos.

My guy complains about my affection for "raw meat" but whatever.

 

[Lady Day]

I took a table manners etiquette class of a 4 course meal in Girl Scouts.
Everything I learned there I use when I dine out.

LD

 

[Lady Jessica]

I wasn't really taught any table manners, but I've been slowly getting better. I have always chewed with my mouth closed and I take small bites, not because it's polite (although that's an added bonus) but because I hate mouth noises. The noise that comes from a mouth when someone eats, or swishes something around, or gargles, or licks their lips loudly drives me crazy! Even if it's me doing it. So I try to keep my bites small and my chewing delicate...

The elbows on the table thing is the hardest part, I think. It was fine as a kid, in my house.

 

[Foofoogal]

I came from a large family and parents were strict so we did not go nuts at the dinner table for sure but when I was 12 due to some family issues I went to live with my brother and his German wife and I became the child she never had for a year.
All of a sudden I was in a whole new world. She was beyond spotless and every single meal came with the works including linens.
I was allowed to drink wine and beer at the meals and though not advocating it of course I learned it could be done with certain guidelines. I found it quite a valuable lesson later when friends went nuts in high school.
Then in high school our school not only had HomeEconomics class but I was in FHA which was Future Homemakers of America. There we learned all about setting tables and manners and even had a parlor in the school and had a tea for end of year.

There are 2 manners that bother me more than most and it is funny I see it that way.
Not only do diners not know how to eat but servers in most restaurants are not tuned into how to wait on people.
---------------------------
At the end of the meal, you should place your used silverware close together on the plate, with the utensils entirely on the plate (less than an inch of the silverware over the side of the plate). This is a signal to the servers that your meal is finished and the dishes can be removed.
-----------------------------------------------------Please pick up dishes.

Nontopic is second:
2. When I meet a man it drives me nuts when they put out their hand to shake as I was always taught a lady should extend her hand out first.
Now I guess nothing means anything anymore. [huh]

 

[Foofoogal]

wow, I looked it up and found this. It must be because I was raised Southern. How funny.lol
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/In_the_U...._her_hand_or_may_he_extend_his_to_shake_hands

 

[AtomicEraTom]

texting also bothers me in almost all aspects of life. There's nothing more irritating than someone carrying on a conversation with you while they text because you know they aren't really listening.

I think the ability to multi-task comes into play here. I couldn't when I started texting, but I am more or less a texting machine slathered in pomede, brylcreem, and oldspice haha. I can completely carry on a conversation with someone in person while texting, and if I'm having trouble focusing, I just set the phone down for a minute.

 

[Charlie Noodles]

I'll use them; but I rarely ever eat at a table with other people. The last thing I remember that came close was eating at a dastarkhān at a friend's birthday dinner.

 

[Lady Jessica]

I think the ability to multi-task comes into play here. I couldn't when I started texting, but I am more or less a texting machine slathered in pomede, brylcreem, and oldspice haha. I can completely carry on a conversation with someone in person while texting, and if I'm having trouble focusing, I just set the phone down for a minute.

My friends do this to me, and I find that I want to talk less when they're texting while talking to me... I feel like they're either not interested in what I have to say, or I'm not entertaining enough for them, or they're too wrapped up in whatever they're texting to talk to me efficiently anyway.

Although I'm horrible at texting and talking, when I do try to do it at the same time. But I guess if you're really good at texting and talking, it wouldn't be so bad...

But I think I got a little off topic, sorry.

Also, I have no idea how to hold a fork correctly... I didn't realize there was a way to do it wrong. [huh]