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You Look It, But Do You Act It?

Quigley Brown

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,745
Location
Des Moines, Iowa
I think I'm, for the most part, old-fashioned...my wardrobe, my courtesy to the fairer sex, my language...but I am very liberal-minded (I hide it pretty well). A few months ago some gay friends of mine took me to my first-ever visit to a gay bar. I really didn't feel uncomfortable in there...even after being asked to dance a few times. :rolleyes:
 

rikrdo

A-List Customer
Messages
326
Location
Yucaipa CA
LOVE to dance............especially to Sinatra.

I dont really LOOK it but I like to think I act the part.
My folks taught me to respect others and their views and to always appreciate diversity.
I believe that talking is overrated and by listening carefully, I can learn plenty.....especially from those fortunate to be older than me.
Ladies are to be cherished and admired and if opening a door is occasionally offensive, I will be the first to apologize.
 
rikrdo said:
LOVE to dance............especially to Sinatra.

I dont really LOOK it but I like to think I act the part.
My folks taught me to respect others and their views and to always appreciate diversity.
I believe that talking is overrated and by listening carefully, I can learn plenty.....especially from those fortunate to be older than me.
Ladies are to be cherished and admired and if opening a door is occasionally offensive, I will be the first to apologize.

*swoon*

I would never be offended by someone being a gentleman. There aren't enough of them about, especially round here. All that it entails is being polite, and not patronising. Well, I think so anyway *sigh*

I only wish I could go somewhere whereI would be likely to be asked to dance. I don't care that I might not be, but noone does things like that really. at least not in Halesowen lol
 

MaryDeluxe

Practically Family
Messages
794
Location
Deluxeville!
I think people would look at me and think that I live a vintage life because I will dress in vintage clothing and I collect vintage things. So in that regard I am living a vintage lifestyle.

I have values, morals, and consider myself a good person. I don't know if that really has anything to do with being into vintage or not, it's just who I am and how I was brought up by my family.

As I see it, there were good people and bad people then with differences in what they believed, just as we have in today's society. We just have easier access in today's world so everyone knows about it. Technology, it just makes it so much easier for us to all sit around and be SHOCKED at what other people are doing!!!lol
 

freebird

Practically Family
Messages
755
Location
Oklahoma
jamespowers said:
A microwave? (Insert out pooring phrase here:p )
I stay far away from the sink. Carrying is another story and compacting is accomplished with a foot. :D

Sounds like you may be related ROFL. We also burn our trash instead of shredding it. (the environmental people will love us for that :eek: ). Our brush gets burned once a year, right now we have a huge bonfire waiting for the next cold rainy day.

We live in an older house (built in the 40's) that has tongue and groove ceilings, floors and walls in the original portion of the house. Being built when it was, there isn't room in the inn for modern conveniences. If I'm not mistaken, the bath was added on later.
 

Darhling

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,517
Location
Norwich, RAF County!
rikrdo said:
LOVE to dance............especially to Sinatra.

I dont really LOOK it but I like to think I act the part.
My folks taught me to respect others and their views and to always appreciate diversity.
I believe that talking is overrated and by listening carefully, I can learn plenty.....especially from those fortunate to be older than me.
Ladies are to be cherished and admired and if opening a door is occasionally offensive, I will be the first to apologize.

can I swoon after Dolly?? Les Sigh
 
freebird said:
Sounds like you may be related ROFL. We also burn our trash instead of shredding it. (the environmental people will love us for that :eek: ). Our brush gets burned once a year, right now we have a huge bonfire waiting for the next cold rainy day.

We live in an older house (built in the 40's) that has tongue and groove ceilings, floors and walls in the original portion of the house. Being built when it was, there isn't room in the inn for modern conveniences. If I'm not mistaken, the bath was added on later.

It makes sense. I wouldn't get rid of cabinet space for a dishwasher or such modern conveniences.
The bath?! Well that we can't live without. We have to have at least 1 1/2.
My brush gets burned too---in the fireplace in winter. ;) :p
 

freebird

Practically Family
Messages
755
Location
Oklahoma
jamespowers said:
It makes sense. I wouldn't get rid of cabinet space for a dishwasher or such modern conveniences.
The bath?! Well that we can't live without. We have to have at least 1 1/2.
My brush gets burned too---in the fireplace in winter. ;) :p

This being Oklahoma, we did upgrade the old propane heating system to central heat and air, also propane powered. My Uncle installed it for us, he's a retired heating and air man. He and his buddies that installed the vents in the ceiling sure had fun sawing through the tongue and groove ceiling lol.

I wish we had a fireplace, sure would make it easier. But we've got an acre and a half with a good view, and the town isn't about to incorporate us, they've incorporated behind us when Loves built on the highway, but there aren't enough people here to pay them for running city water and gas this far out.

Picture004-1.jpg

View out our front door after the ice storm in Jan of 07.

VIEW002.jpg

and today,with an Amish passing on his tractor.
 

Mojito

One Too Many
Messages
1,371
Location
Sydney
rikrdo said:
LOVE to dance............especially to Sinatra.

I dont really LOOK it but I like to think I act the part.
My folks taught me to respect others and their views and to always appreciate diversity.
I believe that talking is overrated and by listening carefully, I can learn plenty.....especially from those fortunate to be older than me.
Ladies are to be cherished and admired and if opening a door is occasionally offensive, I will be the first to apologize.
Your parents raised you well :)

I think there was quite a bit of hostility to polite conventions such as opening the door for women in the 70s and 80s. Not just women declaring they didn't need the gesture, but actually angry about it - as if the gentleman holding the door had verbally told them that were not his equal. I think it was a manifestation of a particular brand of radical feminisim, and somehow a thoughtful and kind gesture became twisted into a paternal gesture of contempt. I remember how gutted my father was about a few instances of this he encountered - women who turned on him and shrilly dressed him down. Rather ironic, as during the time he was Chief of Staff of a major Sydney newspaper in the 1960s he had made a practical contribution to the career options of women by significantly increased the numbers of female editors and subs in the workplace. It wasn't a political statement - he saw them as a pool of largely underutilised talent. He also encouraged me to pursue my education and career, and fostered my love of history.

Hopefully that period of nastiness about door opening was a blip - I know in my circles, the idea of being angry at a man opening a door for a lady is now considered very old-fashioned and dated itself. I'm aware that physically I'm frequently more fit than the man who opens it for me (and often they know it as well - my colleagues and friends often see me coming in from a run), and very often taller, and I don't think that the gesture is making a statement about paternalism or any weakness on my part - I'm sure that he knows I am quite capable of manipulating a door handle. It's a courtesy.

I also hold open doors for anyone coming after me, male or female.
 
Wow that's crazy, being angry about having a door held open. It's just polite. I do it for everyone, well, if there is someone coming through the door anyway. I often think I am a bit too polite when it comes to such things, yu can end up standing for a while holding a door :rolleyes:

In my previous job, I occasionally asked an older lady or gentleman if they needed help carrying their tray. I always felt a little uncomfortable with it, but I was being polite, you know? I was worried it may be misconstrued as me suggesting they were old and so incapable of carrying it, or something, when I was in fact just being genuinely polite. It's funny how something like that can be offensive, when you are trying to do the right thing. :eek:
 
freebird said:
This being Oklahoma, we did upgrade the old propane heating system to central heat and air, also propane powered. My Uncle installed it for us, he's a retired heating and air man. He and his buddies that installed the vents in the ceiling sure had fun sawing through the tongue and groove ceiling lol.

I wish we had a fireplace, sure would make it easier. But we've got an acre and a half with a good view, and the town isn't about to incorporate us, they've incorporated behind us when Loves built on the highway, but there aren't enough people here to pay them for running city water and gas this far out.

Picture004-1.jpg

View out our front door after the ice storm in Jan of 07.

VIEW002.jpg

and today,with an Amish passing on his tractor.

Believe me, you are better off getting your own gas and water. It probably costs less that is for sure. ;) :p
I know what you mean about sawing through old materials. The electrician loved putting up two new fixtures in my livingroom. Plaster, lathe and beams---hmmmm....:p
A fireplace is very vintage. I love having two over here. It sure saves on heating costs---that and I am a bit of a pyro. Burn baby burn. :D Those fallen limbs are making me think about how they would go up in the fireplace. You have enough there for a few days.
 

Mojito

One Too Many
Messages
1,371
Location
Sydney
That can be a tough call, Dollydaydream. I try to make the offer, but am always hesitant when they refuse on the first try because I automatically do the same ("oh, please, don't bother - I'm fine, really"). I saw an elderly lady struggling to push a large shopping trolly across a sloping busy road - it was moving sideways, and she was quite frail. Two of us rushed to her assistance, and her automatic response was not to trouble us - but clearly, she really *did* need assistance. We had to find a tactful form of words, as I don't think either of us wanted to seem patronising or bullying her into accepting our help, but it really was quite a frightening situation and she was struggling. In the end she was grateful and let us help her all the way to the car.

I offer my seat on buses to women with children, people with a disability and elderly men and women. My father told me he knew he was getting old when a young woman offered her seat to him - he was a bit upset, as he was more accustomed to it being the other way around!

One positive thing I'll say about manners today - there are so many instances we hear of on the news of people not going to the assistance of those who have suffered an accident and walking on obliviously, but in recent weeks I've seen two instances when it's happened close to me and people have been on hand immediately to assist. One was a bike rider who slipped on wet bricks and fell hard - by the time I got to him, there were several people who had run over and were helping. Another was a woman who slipped on the sidewalk - while someone picked up her things others helped her to her feet and dusted her off. I don't think that these are either old-fashioned or modern manners - this sort of practical concern for others is and should be timeless.
 

Miss 1929

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,397
Location
Oakland, California
Me neither.

Admin Note: No reason dredging up old controversies. Perhaps you missed the memo, but contentiousness is over in this thread. Thanks, -HJ


Another thing worth noting, when we start talking about how our Golden Era fascination makes us like they were back then - that doesn't really work logically.

As an example, many of us like Art Deco as it is a charming old-fashioned, more decorative style than the modern designers currently offer. However, it was a success back then because it was modern and LESS decorative than the styles preceding it.

People back then did not have the freedom (socially) to dress up in garments of 50 to 80 years previous, they would have been shunned and probably thought of as insane.

We are none of us as normal as we think we are...thank goodness!
 
Mojito said:
Your parents raised you well :)

I think there was quite a bit of hostility to polite conventions such as opening the door for women in the 70s and 80s. Not just women declaring they didn't need the gesture, but actually angry about it - as if the gentleman holding the door had verbally told them that were not his equal. I think it was a manifestation of a particular brand of radical feminisim, and somehow a thoughtful and kind gesture became twisted into a paternal gesture of contempt. I remember how gutted my father was about a few instances of this he encountered - women who turned on him and shrilly dressed him down. Rather ironic, as during the time he was Chief of Staff of a major Sydney newspaper in the 1960s he had made a practical contribution to the career options of women by significantly increased the numbers of female editors and subs in the workplace. It wasn't a political statement - he saw them as a pool of largely underutilised talent. He also encouraged me to pursue my education and career, and fostered my love of history.

Hopefully that period of nastiness about door opening was a blip - I know in my circles, the idea of being angry at a man opening a door for a lady is now considered very old-fashioned and dated itself. I'm aware that physically I'm frequently more fit than the man who opens it for me (and often they know it as well - my colleagues and friends often see me coming in from a run), and very often taller, and I don't think that the gesture is making a statement about paternalism or any weakness on my part - I'm sure that he knows I am quite capable of manipulating a door handle. It's a courtesy.

I also hold open doors for anyone coming after me, male or female.

Oh geez! :eusa_doh: It wasn't just me who encountered that stuff out there eh? Yep, they just looked at you like you were insulting them. After about five minutes of that you actually felt like insulting them.:rage:
I open the door for both and particularly for the senior citizens as they won't give me that look---men or women.
I also give up my seat for women and the elderly. Never had a bad experience there though. :D
 

freebird

Practically Family
Messages
755
Location
Oklahoma
jamespowers said:
Believe me, you are better off getting your own gas and water. It probably costs less that is for sure. ;) :p
I know what you mean about sawing through old materials. The electrician loved putting up two new fixtures in my livingroom. Plaster, lathe and beams---hmmmm....:p
A fireplace is very vintage. I love having two over here. It sure saves on heating costs---that and I am a bit of a pyro. Burn baby burn. :D Those fallen limbs are making me think about how they would go up in the fireplace. You have enough there for a few days.


That is true,we're missing out on all kinds of city taxes lol. We have 2 drilled wells on the property and could clean them out and use them for water if necessary. There were a ton of limbs down that's for sure. The property is pretty well shaded. We had limbs the size of small trees down from that storm. Talk about going back in time...we were without electricity for 3 days. My Aunt cooked as her range didn't require electric, and we relied upon flashlights and kerosene lamps. No TV, no radio (well, almost none, I did have my ham radio's charged prior to losing the power, so I could listen to the police and weather), we sure did a lot of reading during those days. I think it hit 42 degrees in the house.

I'm wanting to add another room onto the house, with a fireplace, for just such occasions as the ice storm, plus the atmosphere is nice too. When camping I'm the guy who keeps a fire going 24/7 whether I need it or not lol. I like to sit in front of the fire and smoke my pipe of an evening.
 
freebird said:
That is true,we're missing out on all kinds of city taxes lol. We have 2 drilled wells on the property and could clean them out and use them for water if necessary. There were a ton of limbs down that's for sure. The property is pretty well shaded. We had limbs the size of small trees down from that storm. Talk about going back in time...we were without electricity for 3 days. My Aunt cooked as her range didn't require electric, and we relied upon flashlights and kerosene lamps. No TV, no radio (well, almost none, I did have my ham radio's charged prior to losing the power, so I could listen to the police and weather), we sure did a lot of reading during those days. I think it hit 42 degrees in the house.

I'm wanting to add another room onto the house, with a fireplace, for just such occasions as the ice storm, plus the atmosphere is nice too. When camping I'm the guy who keeps a fire going 24/7 whether I need it or not lol. I like to sit in front of the fire and smoke my pipe of an evening.

42 degrees inside the house!? Now that was definitely vintage! :eek: :p
I would be out of luck as I have an electric stove. Not really my choice but it was there and I am not going to replace it as long as its working fine---how about that for vintage? Frugality and not buying what you don't need. :p
The fireplace makes a difference and if you don't mind feeding it then you are set. ;) I used to tend the fire whether we needed it or not as well. Ambiance you know. lol lol
 

Miss 1929

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,397
Location
Oakland, California
Sorry!

Miss 1929 said:
Admin Note: No reason dredging up old controversies. Perhaps you missed the memo, but contentiousness is over in this thread. Thanks, -HJ

I didn't think I was dredging, I am still confused by her wording...whatever. But it looks like you still have a lot of pruning to do, there's still a lot of the previous (very interesting and polite) conversation there to pique curiousity...
 

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