You know you are getting old when:

[scottyrocks]

I'm making reference to dress codes today that allows for students to wear practically
not much which shows a lack of respect for themselves as well as for others.
That you had to put up with certain rules or dress code during the weather conditions
that you mentioned is sad and can understand why you feel the way you do.

It's a completely different mindset. I work with young people over the summers, and mostly everyone in that age range dresses very minimally, mainly because of the heat. There is not one thought in their minds that they are doing anything degrading or wrong, and I agree with them.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Yep. One of my concession kids got hauled into the principal's office and was "counseled" about her clothing -- "it's distracting to the boys." It was a very hot day, the AC in the school is conceptual only, and she wasn't buying it. "Really?" she said. "Then whose fault is it they haven't been taught good study habits?"

Wicked proud of her, I was.

 

[Fading Fast]

⇧ That's a great line - kudos to her. I get and, as a libertarian, support the freedom-to-dress-as-you-want view. It is pretty obvious that that view has resulted in many (far from all) women wearing very revealing clothes in many situations where traditionally that wasn't the norm. Again, I'm good - free to choose and all that.

What the wisdom of the ages says (being a bit flip here - I'm referring to long standing social conventions for centuries and in many cultures) is that men and women do not approach sex and relationships the same way and demure dressing for women was, in part, society's attempt to address some of the concerns that arose out of those differences. Some went as far as to say it protected women. Today, progressive thought says that most / all of those gender differences are not genetically real but culturally imposed by a patriarchal society.

It will be interesting to see ten, fifty and hundred years from now which view is prevailing as I am not at all convinced that this one is settled. Me - I go with the free to choose and punish men if they behave badly (other than the accusation-equals-guilt part - every one deserves his or her day in court / innocent until proven guilty - I'm a big #MeToo advocate). But again, I am not convince that the present trajectory will be tenable.

 

[LizzieMaine]

I'm not one of these 100 percent nurture not nature types. One of the most fascinating things I ever heard was a radio interview with a person who was transitioning from female to male, and who described the effects of testosterone therapy. He said he could actually sense his brain realigning, and that he'd be riding on the subway minding his own business and suddenly he'd be consumed with thoughts of wanting to have sex with the woman sitting across the car. Or wanting to fight with the guy sitting next to her -- just raw, chemically-driven aggression. I think cases like that prove that a lot of what goes on in our heads is rooted in brain chemistry, not just socially-designated role-playing.

But the thing is, he also understood the need to control those feelings. Just because they were there in his head, didn't mean he had to act on them, or allow his actions to be shaped by them. He found that learning that system of control, without having gone thru the usual male adolescence to be an extremely difficult situation -- but he acknowledged that it was now his responsibility to learn to deal with those feelings. That woman across the car wasn't responsible for the flaring of his sex drive -- it was up to him to learn how to sublimate it. "Boys will be boys" just didn't cut it for him, nor should it for anyone else.

 

[3fingers]

He said he could actually sense his brain realigning, and that he'd be riding on the subway minding his own business and suddenly he'd be consumed with thoughts of wanting to have sex with the woman sitting across the car. Or wanting to fight with the guy sitting next to her -- just raw, chemically-driven aggression.

I'm not saying that there aren't people whose mind may function this way, but might it be possible that statements like that make for a more interesting interview?

 

[Fading Fast]

I'm not one of these 100 percent nurture not nature types. One of the most fascinating things I ever heard was a radio interview with a person who was transitioning from female to male, and who described the effects of testosterone therapy. He said he could actually sense his brain realigning, and that he'd be riding on the subway minding his own business and suddenly he'd be consumed with thoughts of wanting to have sex with the woman sitting across the car. Or wanting to fight with the guy sitting next to her -- just raw, chemically-driven aggression. I think cases like that prove that a lot of what goes on in our heads is rooted in brain chemistry, not just socially-designated role-playing.

But the thing is, he also understood the need to control those feelings. Just because they were there in his head, didn't mean he had to act on them, or allow his actions to be shaped by them. He found that learning that system of control, without having gone thru the usual male adolescence to be an extremely difficult situation -- but he acknowledged that it was now his responsibility to learn to deal with those feelings. That woman across the car wasn't responsible for the flaring of his sex drive -- it was up to him to learn how to sublimate it. "Boys will be boys" just doesn't cut it.

Yup, I'm all for adults, in particular - regardless of their upbringing (who doesn't have baggage) - being responsible for acting as adults / for adults being responsible for their actions. Everybody has some bad instincts, inclinations, urges, etc. - adults control those which is what makes civilization. Politicians, sports stars, celebrities all set bad examples when they lose control and then blame everybody or every internal inclination / feeling / urge (which conveniently get recategorized as "addictions") for their bad behavior. That said, I can understand a school or parent seeing some nuance with "boys will be boys" with some actions of a ten year old, but when you enter adulthood, I'm with you, it just doesn't cut it.

 

[2jakes]

I'm not saying that there aren't people whose mind may function this way, but might it be possible that statements like that make for a more interesting interview?

Yep!
"Wickedly" interesting interviews indeed!

 

[scottyrocks]

I'm not one of these 100 percent nurture not nature types. One of the most fascinating things I ever heard was a radio interview with a person who was transitioning from female to male, and who described the effects of testosterone therapy. He said he could actually sense his brain realigning, and that he'd be riding on the subway minding his own business and suddenly he'd be consumed with thoughts of wanting to have sex with the woman sitting across the car. Or wanting to fight with the guy sitting next to her -- just raw, chemically-driven aggression. I think cases like that prove that a lot of what goes on in our heads is rooted in brain chemistry, not just socially-designated role-playing.

But the thing is, he also understood the need to control those feelings. Just because they were there in his head, didn't mean he had to act on them, or allow his actions to be shaped by them. He found that learning that system of control, without having gone thru the usual male adolescence to be an extremely difficult situation -- but he acknowledged that it was now his responsibility to learn to deal with those feelings. That woman across the car wasn't responsible for the flaring of his sex drive -- it was up to him to learn how to sublimate it. "Boys will be boys" just didn't cut it for him, nor should it for anyone else.

My goodness, I couldn't agree more.

 

[Zombie_61]

When they flirt and tell you that you are cute and the first thing that comesto mind....where were these chicks when I was a young man?

As a very good friend once told me, "I used to think they were flirting with me, but one day I realized they were just being nice to the 'old guy'".

...One of the most fascinating things I ever heard was a radio interview with a person who was transitioning from female to male, and who described the effects of testosterone therapy. He said he could actually sense his brain realigning, and that he'd be riding on the subway minding his own business and suddenly he'd be consumed with thoughts of wanting to have sex with the woman sitting across the car. Or wanting to fight with the guy sitting next to her -- just raw, chemically-driven aggression. I think cases like that prove that a lot of what goes on in our heads is rooted in brain chemistry, not just socially-designated role-playing...

I heard a very similar radio interview years ago in which the person being interviewed had already transitioned from female to male. He said that almost from the moment he began testosterone therapy it was like a switch in his brain had suddenly been flipped, and that at least 75 percent of his daily thoughts were thereafter preoccupied with sex. He said that was one of the more difficult and mostly unexpected aspects of his transition, and that it took quite some time to learn how to deal with it. He did also briefly mention heightened aggressive tendencies, but said those were far easier for him to deal with than the near-constant thoughts of sex.

 

[2jakes]

As a very good friend once told me, "I used to think they were flirting with me, but one day I realized they were just being nice to the 'old guy'".

Being "nice" never gets old!

I'll take it anytime no matter how they
meant it.
Just got back from the grocery store and have a smile on my face.
I owe it to these gals at the store, employees or
customers, young and old alike.
It feels good!

 

[tonyb]

I once again recommend Gore Vidal’s essay “The Birds and the Bees.”

Yes, it’s a “gendered” take on the matter. But we disregard biology at our own peril.

 

[2jakes]

You know you're getting old when...

all your injuries are a result of sleeping weird!

 

[Zombie_61]

You know you're getting old when...
View attachment 135836
all your injuries are a result of sleeping weird!

Or someone else sleeping weird. I was awake through most of last night due to a bout of insomnia, but finally attempted to go to bed and get some sleep some time after 3:00 a.m.. After tossing and turning for more than an hour, I finally started to drift off when my wife shifted position and drove one of her knees into my stomach like she was fending off an attacker. I don't know what she might have been dreaming about, but it was partially my fault for being in such close proximity to her while she was asleep. Yeah, not the first time something like this has happened during our 37 years of wedded bliss.

 

[2jakes]

Or someone else sleeping weird. I was awake through most of last night due to a bout of insomnia, but finally attempted to go to bed and get some sleep some time after 3:00 a.m.. After tossing and turning for more than an hour, I finally started to drift off when my wife shifted position and drove one of her knees into my stomach like she was fending off an attacker. I don't know what she might have been dreaming about, but it was partially my fault for being in such close proximity to her while she was asleep. Yeah, not the first time something like this has happened during our 37 years of wedded bliss.

I thought zombies never slept.
_______________________________

_______________________________

 

[Zombie_61]

I thought zombies never slept.

Yeah, that's a popular misconception. Usually we wear sleep masks that look something like this...

..so the living think we're awake and leave us alone.

 

[2jakes]

If you remember using cameras which required film.

 

[2jakes]

if you have difficulty using digital cameras.

 

[MisterCairo]

Remember? I still do... just got back ten rolls taken in Victoria, BC in July. I will post some pics in the photography thread soon, our drug store also scans them to disk as part of the package!

The "one hour" is long gone. They are sent out to the lab on a Tuesday, and returned to the store the Thursday of the following week. Not bad, really.

If you remember using cameras which required film.
View attachment 135898

 

[2jakes]

Remember? I still do... just got back ten rolls taken in Victoria, BC in July. I will post some pics in the photography thread soon, our drug store also scans them to disk as part of the package!

The "one hour" is long gone. They are sent out to the lab on a Tuesday, and returned to the store the Thursday of the following week. Not bad, really.

I got spoiled by modern technology.
But there was a time when I had a darkroom for my B&W fotos!
I miss the odor of those chemicals.

 

[Zombie_61]

...The "one hour" is long gone. They are sent out to the lab on a Tuesday, and returned to the store the Thursday of the following week. Not bad, really.

For an amateur "point and click" photographer like me, arguably the best advantage of digital cameras is being able to instantly review the results of your attempts to determine whether or not you've captured the moment the way you wanted to. A close second would be the ability to snap that shot multiple times, choose the "best" one, and delete the rest without the wasted expense of having the "bad" shots developed along with the "good".