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Why don't we write letters anymore?

Apple Annie

New in Town
Messages
45
Location
Ol' Blighty
And I say this as an affirmed member of the internet generation.
Emails are all very well for arranging meet ups and keeping up to date with events, but they're not the same as letters. You just have to read the letters by Oscar Wilde or the collection of letters called 84 Charing Cross Road to know that emails don't truly replace letters. They never go into the same depths. Or perhaps we just don't express ourselves to our friends as much as we used to?

And then letters are so much nicer to receive. If they're written on nice paper, and maybe there'll be the smell of what was being cooked for dinner or a trace of perfume.

Why are we letting such a wonderful form of communication die out?
 

Delthayre

One of the Regulars
Messages
258
Location
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
The scribe of Albany

As someone who regularly writes letters, I can attest to producing extended passages of extended text demands longer spans of time than producing the same text by typing. Errors typed onto a computer are also easier to correct than written ones. For most modern people, writing legibly at length is very difficult, if not impossible. They are all quite used to typing, cannot write cursively and their print writing, even if of adequate legibility, is very inconvenient for long passages.

I find the mere sight of a handwritten page delightful and writing by hand is sometimes salubrious to my concentration, but I doubt that most others are of the same sentiment, although my handwritten letters are invariably welcomed by those who receive them.
 

GwenLake

One of the Regulars
Messages
250
Location
Józefów, Poland
I recently sent a five-page letter on nice stationary ( pretty flowers!) to my brother in college. I didn't really say much (it was five pages of nothing), but my brother said he appreciated it a lot. :)
 

shortbow

Practically Family
Messages
744
Location
british columbia
I also still write letters, thankfully I grew up in the pre-computer dependent age. I write them with a dip pen on the nicest paper I can find and seal them with wax in the old way, no envelope used. Fun to do and fun to receive.
 

Fletch

I'll Lock Up
Messages
8,865
Location
Iowa - The Land That Stuff Forgot
Anymore, it's too personal.

Yes, I said too personal. It sends a mixed signal. Taking this kind of time suggests to the recipient that you really care about them. And yet if you did really care, you'd be in constant contact by phone/e/txt/etc. and would have little or nothing saved up to communicate.

When communication is so easy and fast, the person who bottles it inside and waits needs a very good reason. So I think letters, just like other civil rituals between people, can actually come off a bit creepy in an age of fast-paced informality.

I write email the way I used to write letters, and believe me, that's awkward enough in some situations. Nowadays you need to save the charm and polish until you get to know a person, leaving...what?...for your first impression? I haven't figured it out.
 

carter

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,921
Location
Corsicana, TX
Delthayre said:
As someone who regularly writes letters, I can attest to producing extended passages of extended text demands longer spans of time than producing the same text by typing. Errors typed onto a computer are also easier to correct than written ones. For most modern people, writing legibly at length is very difficult, if not impossible. They are all quite used to typing, cannot write cursively and their print writing, even if of adequate legibility, is very inconvenient for long passages.

I find the mere sight of a handwritten page delightful and sometimes salubrious to my concentration, but I doubt that most others are of the same sentiment, although my handwritten letters are invariably welcomed by those who receive them.

I quite agree with this post. Unfortunately, the art of letter writing is becoming yet another vintage exercise. Penmanship is no longer taught in schools and, while understandable, it's a skill I'm sorry to see no longer practiced.

I eagerly anticipate receiving letters from my mother. They're warm and tactile in a way an email could never be. She writes with a beautiful hand. I only wish I could achieve a cursive style as lovely as hers.
 

TraditionalFrog

One of the Regulars
Messages
129
Location
Indianapolis, Ind.
Ahh... the lost art of letter writing.

I used to write letters to family whilst attending boarding school in the early 1990's. Believe it or not I received letters in reply, especially from mum.

I still wrote letters for a short period of time after I moved on my own. I soon grew weary of this as instead of a letter in response, the response would inevitably be via e-mail or telephone. To me there is nothing more disheartening than writing a several page letter to get a two line e-mail "Got your letter. Thanks". So I gave up.

I now generally respond to people via the media they contacted me (telephone for telephone, e-mail for an e-mail, letter for a letter &c).

Like I mentioned above, I'd love to write but I don't like putting the time and effort in to a letter to get a two line e-mail or 30 second voice-mail "thanks" as the only reply.

Sad.
 

seres

A-List Customer
Messages
457
Location
Alaska
I’m about 50 and I always send handwritten letters or cards to my friends and family for important events. Looking back over the past year, I’ve sent 6 handwritten letters of sympathy to friends in the US who have had a family member die. Not a store-bought card, but a real handwritten letter of sympathy. Not one person has responded, either with a call or return letter.

For years—decades—I’ve been sending Christmas cards with a personal handwritten greeting. Last year I sent 42 cards go to close friends and family in the US, and 8 cards to friends and family in Europe. While only 4 US friends replied with a card, every one of my European friends responded—usually with a card and a handwritten letter! I can only conclude that most people in the US are too busy (or think they are too busy) to respond.
 

Miles Borocky

Familiar Face
Messages
59
Location
Texas
I always intend to write more letters-- Ugh. I do enjoy having written them though, and of course, I LOVE receiving them. It's clearly generational though. My mother and grandmother--both of whom stopped school with the twelfth grade--write some of the loveliest letters I've ever read. They were never groomed on the terse prose of email.

A sad loss!
 

TheDutchess

One of the Regulars
Messages
209
Location
North Carolina
I think there is something incredibly romantic about writing a letter to someone. To bad the art of it has been pushed to the side. I think for me, I would write letters more if it didnt cost so dern much to buy sationary, a stamp, envelope, and the drive to the nearest post office, which never seems to be very near. Even those free standing boxes i hardly see anymore. Random though, but what happened to having pen pals? I haven't had a pen pal since i was 8 lol. Anybody want a pal? I'm open.
 

DerMann

Practically Family
Messages
608
Location
Texas
As another person who has grown up with the internet as a primary means of communication, I must say (and agree) that letter writing has been relegated to a very personal means of communication.

That being said, I've written only a few letters for personal use, and have gotten almost completely polar responses.

My friend and I had been in the same Latin class for three years (Latin II-IV), so we had become pretty close. A week before we left for college, I gave her a Parker Lady Duofold (in a magnificent Jade colour) and a bottle of Quink blue. After she moved into her dorm and what have you, I got a message on Facebook asking for my address. Instead of just sending it to her via Facebook in impersonal font, I wrote out a two page letter, scanned it, uploaded it and sent it to her. Day after I moved in to my dorm, I found a letter from her in my mailbox. Even though I rely much more on technology, she found the idea of being pen pals as almost romantic. I was rather flattered that she took the idea so far, but I never imagined that it would be construed that way.

I also did the exact same thing (pen and all) with a girl that I had been unofficially dating for the latter half of my senior year. The only difference is that I sent it via USPS with her name and address done in magnificent Spencerian (trying to be modest, but it really was the best I had ever done). Granted she had told me on several occasions that FPs are inconvenient, she gratefully accepted it, but the enclosed letter was just a bit much for her, I suppose. She was a technophiliac like me, and I guess the amount of time and effort put into a letter was too much for her.

Unless you are writing to a family member, someone very close (almost intimately), or for business, it can very easily be misconstrued as socially overly ambitious. Which is rather odd, really. Back in the 30s and 40s, or so I perceive it, it was a huge event if a girl gave you her phone number - and I still kind of treat it as milestone in a relationship when I get a girl's phone number. The way most people throw their phone numbers around, it has lost most, if not all, of its significance.
 

Apple Annie

New in Town
Messages
45
Location
Ol' Blighty
TheDutchess said:
I think there is something incredibly romantic about writing a letter to someone. To bad the art of it has been pushed to the side. I think for me, I would write letters more if it didnt cost so dern much to buy sationary, a stamp, envelope, and the drive to the nearest post office, which never seems to be very near. Even those free standing boxes i hardly see anymore. Random though, but what happened to having pen pals? I haven't had a pen pal since i was 8 lol. Anybody want a pal? I'm open.

Luckily, in my quintessentially English town, I have a little red postbox round every corner, but no one to write to or receive letters from.
I'd be your pen pal, I haven't had one for years either lol. We should set up a FL pen pal service thingy, to revive the vintage art of letter writing.
 

Paisley

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,439
Location
Indianapolis
TraditionalFrog said:
I still wrote letters for a short period of time after I moved on my own. I soon grew weary of this as instead of a letter in response, the response would inevitably be via e-mail or telephone. To me there is nothing more disheartening than writing a several page letter to get a two line e-mail "Got your letter. Thanks". So I gave up.

Like I mentioned above, I'd love to write but I don't like putting the time and effort in to a letter to get a two line e-mail or 30 second voice-mail "thanks" as the only reply.

Sad.

Sounds like the reason I don't entertain anymore.
 

K.D. Lightner

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,354
Location
Des Moines, IA
Even back in the day, I did not like writing letters, probably because my penmanship was so poor. It was tedious to write letters as long as I wanted them to be (once got up to 30 pages and never sent the thing).

One I had a typewriter, I wrote long letters on them and was delighted with email. I correspond a lot on email, once in a while send a written message in a card.

Hand writing is becoming a lost art, but I know lots of people who buy fountain pens and love to write; many scrapbookers and people who send cards even take calligraphy classes so they know how to write.

Hard for me to believe they don't teach that stuff in the schools, anymore. In the very near future, calligraphy will become a true art form.

Some of the people in my calligraphy classes actually made money hiring themselves out to write out invitations and holiday cards for people. That's how far it's come.

karol
 

Foofoogal

Banned
Messages
4,884
Location
Vintage Land
For years—decades—I’ve been sending Christmas cards with a personal handwritten greeting.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me too till last year. (just never sent them, I did do some though, I was disheartened when I realized how few I did get the year before) I no kidding have every single Christmas card me and honey have ever received in our 33 years of marriage. I keep them in a big Santa bag. lol
Still debating if I will this year but will probably go ahead as it is my tradition. It is pretty odd to think though that during leaner times people still sent out cards. I guess it much more expensive cost of living wise now?
I guess sending out the cards should not be dependent on if they send you one back but it is nice to receive them. I have a special hanging thing to hang them on and it doesn't look exactly festive to put up bare. I remember years ago I had like little clotheslines I would hang them across the wall. I would have several lines going. Really cute. :(
 

Mrs. Merl

Practically Family
Messages
527
Location
Colorado Mountains
I love letter writing and do so regularly. I often get mailed replies as well. I think it is just so exciting to get "real mail" in the post! My husband and I also study penmanship - Spencerian specifically! (I love penmanship so much - I personally lettered every envelope in Spencerian when we got married! And - in this "form letter" world I wrote personal thank you's to every person who remembered us on our day!) Even when people do not respond or respond electronically - I keep writing letters - it is who I am and how I want my world to be - despite the odds! I am off to post a letter as a matter of fact, just now!
 

Apple Annie

New in Town
Messages
45
Location
Ol' Blighty
Foofoogal said:
It is pretty odd to think though that during leaner times people still sent out cards. I guess it much more expensive cost of living wise now?

Don't forget that you wouldn't get the expensive "designer" cards that you get nowadays, they'd be hand made ones which would be much cheaper. I found a box of cards from my Great Grandmother and they had flowers that she'd pressed on them, or little sketches. They'd only have cost pennies even in today's money. Now you can buy cards for £5 which seems to make it alright that you've spent about 30 seconds writing the greeting.
 

K.D. Lightner

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,354
Location
Des Moines, IA
I think, also, years ago, the holiday card was a way of staying in touch with people you might otherwise lose track of, i.e. old friends in other places and/or cousins, aunts and uncles.

For years, mother got a once-a-year card from a cousin out in California. Then, one year she didn't get one. I checked for her on the social security death index and found out the cousin had died.

Now, with the internet, friends in other places stay in touch and remain close, some emailing each other every day. I have done that with my San Diego friends and we are still close and involved in each other's lives.

karol
 

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