Vintage dating?

[eldonkr]

Anyone know of any good vintage dating sites? I googled it and all I found was stuff in relation to wine, and something in Pennsylvania.

It seems like a lot of women these days don't know how to act, or treat a fella. Is there some sort of site where I could meet girls who are a bit more old fashioned?

Or am I just stuck with myspace and match.com?

 

[Mike K.]

There is a Fedora Lounge site on Facebook you could try.

 

[Miss_Bella_Hell]

I think there are a couple rockabilly dating sites.
Also, there's eHarmony, which I hear works.
Also, there's PM on the Fedora Lounge.

 

[reetpleat]

Thing is, many different people are into vintage for different reasons. A woman that is into pin ups and bangs, doesn't necesserily want to be treated like a woman of the 50s. I don't think if you found someone on a "vintage" dating site, you would necesserily get along.

Most old fashioned women or men don't really consider themselves to be that. they just are.

I would suggest you use a normal dating site and specify what you are or want in terms of 'old fashioned' or "into vintage style" or "like a man to be a man and a woman to be a woman."

 

[eldonkr]

well that sounds like a good idea, so whats this thing on facebook that other guy was speaking of?

And i tried eharmony once, they told me they couldn't find anyone to match me with.

 

[Marzipan]

I've never really dated as I seemed to always be in a long-term relationship before I tied the knot. And honestly, with my divorced friends, the prospects seem so bewildering. So I'm sending you good wishes that you find the retro girl of your dreams... who knows how to treat a fella.

 

[Paisley]

One of the guys eHarmony set me up with had pictures of himself in chain mail. And he said he couldn't live without AA. And he lived in Montana. Not quite what I had in mind.

I would try going to swing or other vintage dances to find somebody.

 

[Edward]

With online dating you have to be prepared for the possibility that you'll lose a few dollars discovering there is noone on their database that remotely suits you (my experience with match.com), also that you could be beseiged with offers from folks who blatantly don't fit what you were looking for. A female friend of mine unsubscribed from a site she was on because - despite her profile clearly stating otherwise - she was flooded with offers of men who were older than her late father. (When she complained about this to the company running the board, they suggested she be "more open minded." ).

Yeah.... that and vintage style, and having the mindset of a fifties housewife are two very different things, as stated above. Most any retro-styled lady I've ever met would relieve a man of several limbs were he to suggest she adopt the 50s wifey role model.

 

[The Shirt]

I'm going to throw a couple things out there - and I mean no offense to anyone. I think that finding someone more "vintage minded" starts from within. A large complaint amongst my single friends is that men don't want to date or court anymore. We are completely thrown for a loop when we actually stumble upon someone who does. This means that I have found it very rare that someone opens my car door, offers to put on my coat, or checks on my comfort while out with the gang. Even the rushing to make things physical too early changes my impression of dating. When a fellow actually treats me (or my girlfriends) with respect, care, taking things slow but always assuring one of interest, we act in kind if we are interested. Dating traditionally with new technology and heightened sexual expectations is a difficult path because the instant gratification that society encourages doesn't fall in line with the anticipation and building of a relationship like it used to perhaps (IMHO).

Stating it clearly in an online profile - I think you might be surprised how much response you get. Because there are even girls online like to be courted in a traditional way, meaning the guy does the pursuing, the date planning and the follow-up. Statements must be backed by actions. Looking for an old-fashioned girl and treating her how society has deemed "dating" is now seems like it would be difficult to work out.

I second the idea that a dance class or a swing dance night might be a good place to meet a girl who wants a man to be a man. Perhaps also getting involved in some more "traditional" hobbies/activities might let you stumble upon the types of girls you are looking for (Re-enactments, vintage shop employees, libraries, historical societies etc.)

Just my 2 cents.

 

[pdxvintagette]

I think that The Shirt has hit it with her comments - particularly on the WHERE of finding women who share your aethetics and interests. And just given the average male to female ration alone, you have to assume there are more vintage-interest ladies out there than gentlemen, wondering the exact thing you are.

Now. Just because a vintage-interest gal wants to be treated like a lady while being courted, does not mean she plans to fit into your life in the manner of the 1950's. I wear vintage everyday, and love old fashioned manners. (Although as my friend pointed out, I am so used to UN-gentlemanly men, that I never notice when he pulls out a chair for me!) But when I do notice, those manners are much appreciated. HOWEVER - I run my own business. I make my own schedule. I will cook for a man, but assume he will help clean up, and cook for me on occasion, too.

Online is not an awful way to find people, but for heaven's sake, be sure you make yourself easy to find! Use your keywords, like vintage, retro, swing dancing. When I *blush* browse online, I always use the search term "vintage" -- with zero luck.

I've actually recently decided to take advice similar to that which The Shirt gave you, and I'm no longer actively looking for anything. Being single is not such an awful thing. But I'm going to be moving to San Francisco, and will be making myself busy with the Art Deco society, going out swing dancing, catching the really good rockabilly shows. And I may try to get a little part-time job at one of the vintage shops in town. Just maybe, something good will come along when I'm not looking. And if not ... well, it seems I'd be too busy with my vintage life to notice, at least for a while.

When a fellow actually treats me (or my girlfriends) with respect, care, taking things slow but always assuring one of interest, we act in kind if we are interested. Dating traditionally with new technology and heightened sexual expectations is a difficult path because the instant gratification that society encourages doesn't fall in line with the anticipation and building of a relationship like it used to perhaps (IMHO).....

I second the idea that a dance class or a swing dance night might be a good place to meet a girl who wants a man to be a man. Perhaps also getting involved in some more "traditional" hobbies/activities might let you stumble upon the types of girls you are looking for (Re-enactments, vintage shop employees, libraries, historical societies etc.)

 

[Paisley]

Playing the Odds

Men are usually in the minority at dances.

If you go to...well...pretty much anything that isn't a bar or a sporting event, you'll probably be the only young, unattached guy there. I've seen Denver called "Menver" online, but no matter what I go to, it's always attended by a gaggle of women and a few husbands who have been dragged along.

 

[scotrace]

I am actually Hemingway Jones. And I don't like dating threads.

(Please - we are really seeing an alarming rise in these kinds of threads again, and we prefer to keep things on a more vintage-themed plane.)