Too Much Class?

[rockyj]

Class! A good goal to strive for.

There will always be conflict with class. But, it good try to achive a little in life

 

[Paisley]

3 Different Situations

You don't want to go to a fine restaurant or lounge because you're in the mood for loud or silly fun. Even the Park Avenue residents used to jazz it up in Harlem nightclubs.

You don't want to go to an upscale place because you feel too humble. Maybe nobody there is actually giving you the stink eye or maybe you've never even set foot in the place. If that's the case, the problem is you. (If people are giving you funny looks, then you somehow don't fit it. If you don't want funny looks, then you need to change your appearance or behavior, or go somewhere else. Fair? Maybe not, but that's the way it is.)

In the case of the man staying with Norma Desmond, most men don't like to feel they are being kept like a child or pet (or gigolo).

 

[happyfilmluvguy]

I had a situation where I walked into a pizza parlor in a small town wearing a suit. I didn't get my sandwich for about a half hour or so (and it had been done long before that). I feel it was because the employees had this "you don't belong here" attitude towards me. [huh]

Joe Gillis also kept his overcoat on in Schwabs because he didn't want anyone to see the tuxedo underneath.

I hope I'm not making this sound like an argument, only a discussion.

 

[Paisley]

The incident at the pizza place sounds like reverse snobbery, which is just as bad as the regular kind. If it were an isolated incident at a restaurant I liked, I'd complain to the manager. Otherwise, I'd take my business somewhere else.

 

[Jack Scorpion]

I think what I most appreciate are people that act classy in situations that don't call for it. Sometimes I think I see more class on a subway or crosstown bus than I ever do in an upscale restaurant. When an old man stands up for a woman, even if that woman is a couple decades younger than him; that's class. When someone unbuttons his sportcoat as he sits down, puts the napkin across his lap and picks up the correct salad fork; that's the rules. I feel uncomfortable in the latter kind of situation.

 

[gluegungeisha]

I think what I most appreciate are people that act classy in situations that don't call for it. Sometimes I think I see more class on a subway or crosstown bus than I ever do in an upscale restaurant. When an old man stands up for a woman, even if that woman is a couple decades younger than him; that's class. When someone unbuttons his sportcoat as he sits down, puts the napkin across his lap and picks up the correct salad fork; that's the rules. I feel uncomfortable in the latter kind of situation.

I absolutely agree with you! I have the most appreciation for people who demonstrate respect and kindness in any public outlet. That is true class. I have honestly seen more class in the worst slums of India than I have in the swankier locations in the States.

 

[dhermann1]

The more you feel comfortable in your own skin, the more people will treat you the same in all situations. This is not an easy thing to achieve for a lot of us. True class means you treat everyone with the same respect no matter who they are, rich or poor, high or low. Being slathered with phoney politeness is NOT class. A lot of people have had a lot of negative stuff pounded into them ("You're not good enough! You don't belong!") to such a degree that it becomes permanent baggage that is carried around everywhere. Then we go to a place where we feel that vibe, even tho it's not being projected, because it's what we have inside our heads.
It's usually not clothes that are making us stick out as "not belongiong" it's the body language of feeling out of place.

 

[Paisley]

There are people who can be kind, impartial and gracious under trying circumstances, which means that they are good people. But the same people can feel uncomfortable among those who are richer, more educated or more sophisticated, or they may even take "pride" in being "common as an old shoe." This is not class. It's an attitude that leads to either bowing and scraping or reverse snobbery when they feel out of their depth.

I think that the answer is to dress to suit the occasion (neither under- nor over-dressing), observe the manners and customs, be mannerly, admit that you are new there and ask questions if necessary, and most importantly, be comfortable in your own skin, as DHermann pointed out. If you still don't fit in, or if it is too much effort, then wherever you are isn't the place for you.

 

[Mike K.]

Never let yourself feel out of place because of age or anything else! If you go into any situation feeling and looking classy and confident, people will perceive that. There's a definite difference between social status and having class that we shouldn't confuse.

 

[Miss_Bella_Hell]

The more you feel comfortable in your own skin, the more people will treat you the same in all situations. This is not an easy thing to achieve for a lot of us. True class means you treat everyone with the same respect no matter who they are, rich or poor, high or low. Being slathered with phoney politeness is NOT class. A lot of people have had a lot of negative stuff pounded into them ("You're not good enough! You don't belong!") to such a degree that it becomes permanent baggage that is carried around everywhere. Then we go to a place where we feel that vibe, even tho it's not being projected, because it's what we have inside our heads.
It's usually not clothes that are making us stick out as "not belongiong" it's the body language of feeling out of place.

:eusa_clap Exactly. There is no such thing as a too much class. When you are comfortable in your own skin, even snobbery shouldn't alter your mood; there was a time when I was intimidated by walking into, say, Dior or Prada because generally I can't afford the stuff and thought the salespeople could tell. That time has past. They're there to assist ME after all, and the same is true in the fancy bars and clubs where waiters can sometimes be snooty.