PeterGunnLives
One of the Regulars
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I like to put on small dinners for friends or family and prepare table-side flambeed entrees and desserts for them. To me, table-side service is the essence of the vintage dining experience.By the time I was old enough and able to occasionally afford a nice restaurant, most of the world you are describing was gone, but occasionally, I'd wind up in an old elegant restaurant (usually looking a little tired) and loved all the pomp and ceremony of table-side preparation.
To be fair, it was a novelty for me, so I'm not sure if I'd love it as a "real thing," but I enjoyed it the few times I encountered it. In particular, anything with flames was fun - as was all the brouhaha and commotion that occurred around making a Caesar salad table side. You can capture some of that experience again today when, in some places, they make the guacamole fresh table side.
Another great way to experience all of that is in old movies. Every once in awhile in an old movie, the characters will be in an upscaled restaurant and all the things you describe (right down to flaming this or that) will go on.
Another thing I notice in those old movies is how there was almost a chain of command where a formally dressed and serious host would walk you to your table and properly had you off to an equally serious waiter who would hand you a menu. Occasionally, the waiter would bark orders to what I guess where water boys or "helpers" or something, but there was more than a bit of military orderliness to it all. Certainly none of this "hi, I'm Jane and I'll be your waitress this evening" stuff going on.
Probably all just cultural stuff that changes and evolves, but clearly a different standard in those days at those types of restaurants.
The old-school upscale restaurant scene definitely isn't a mainstream, everyday thing anymore. I use Peter Moruzzi's book "Classic Dining" as a starting point for finding these kinds of establishments: https://petermoruzzi.com/2012/07/01/moruzzis-new-classic-dining-book-available-for-pre-order/
Unfortunately, some of the examples that are listed in the book have already closed down. I want to try as many as I can before they go extinct!