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The loss of occasion

Rundquist

A-List Customer
Messages
431
BellyTank said:
What are "intensive purposes"..?
Sounds strangely agrarian.


B
T


Doh! That is my brain not working. It should have read “intents and purposes”. :eek: I swapped it out.
 

Dan Allen

A-List Customer
Messages
395
Location
Oklahoma
I attended my brother in laws funeral this Monday and the wife and I were the only ones there that dressed what I consider appropriate. Looking around the church it occurred to me that we might as well have been to a cattle auction. Have people grown that dis-respective or as a lot just lazy?
 
Messages
10,883
Location
Portage, Wis.
I do think there's a movement toward some class and formality.

Who's to say what has caused it?

Shows like Mad Men, perhaps? Or is it that people have just had their fill of a lack of formality in ANY situation and the pendulum is beginning to swing?

Just a couple of thoughts. No matter what the cause, or causes, I like to think the Lounge and our message had an influence.
 

Shangas

I'll Lock Up
Messages
6,116
Location
Melbourne, Australia
I think it's pop culture at the moment. Stuff like all those gangster movies, Boardwalk Empire, Downton Abbey, etc. They're glamorising the styles of the past, and making them popular again.
 
I attended my brother in laws funeral this Monday and the wife and I were the only ones there that dressed what I consider appropriate. Looking around the church it occurred to me that we might as well have been to a cattle auction. Have people grown that dis-respective or as a lot just lazy?

Hopefully it won't be anytime soon, but the next time I attend a funeral for a relative, and someone shows up dressed like they're going to a ball game or the rodeo, I might just throw their ass out of the church.
 

fashion frank

One Too Many
Messages
1,173
Location
Woonsocket Rhode Island
I think it's pop culture at the moment. Stuff like all those gangster movies, Boardwalk Empire, Downton Abbey, etc. They're glamorising the styles of the past, and making them popular again.

THANK GOD FOR THAT !!!

BTW I love that show Boardwalk Empire , I got H.B.O. for just that reason, the show .

I for one never go anywhere unless I look "presentable " like today for example ,went to Mass and this afternoon we are going to a big band swing show .

All the Best ,Fashion Frank

P.S. There is a Thread on here somewhere statred by a minister who was complaining about this very subject .
 

1961MJS

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,370
Location
Norman Oklahoma
I attended my brother in laws funeral this Monday and the wife and I were the only ones there that dressed what I consider appropriate. Looking around the church it occurred to me that we might as well have been to a cattle auction. Have people grown that dis-respective or as a lot just lazy?

Hi

Sorry for you loss. Here in Oklahoma, people actually dress pretty well for things like auctions. I haven't been to a funeral here though. In Wichita, people show up at funerals in whatever they happen to have on when it's time to go. In down state Illinois, everyone was in at least a dress shirt and pants for visitation etc. I'd bet that under 50% of men under the age of 35 own a suit, much less one that they can actually get in to.

Later
 

Stearmen

I'll Lock Up
Messages
7,202
Hopefully it won't be anytime soon, but the next time I attend a funeral for a relative, and someone shows up dressed like they're going to a ball game or the rodeo, I might just throw their ass out of the church.

I don't think you would have much luck with that at the last three funerals I attended! They were all for fellow motorcycle riders, we all rode of course and wore our club colors! By the way, the widows were all very pleased to see us. At one, after we scattered the ashes up in the mountain pass, we all revved our engines as a salute, I know Frank would appreciate that!
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IMG_20130824_101752_511_zps02416fc8.jpg
 

JonnyO

A-List Customer
Messages
463
Location
Troy, NY
My sister was just married this past weekend, and I was a groomsman. For the rehersal at the church I wore a 3 piece suit, while others wore dress pants with a dress shirt. The women were mostly dressed in dresses or dress clothing. There was an exception to both sides, both a man and woman found it appropriate to wear jeans, hooded sweatshirts, and shoes/work boots. I found this appaling and was trying to find a reason why this type of dress felt appropriate to them for not only the occasion, but for being in a church.
 
Messages
17,198
Location
New York City
I don't think you would have much luck with that at the last three funerals I attended! They were all for fellow motorcycle riders, we all rode of course and wore our club colors! By the way, the widows were all very pleased to see us. At one, after we scattered the ashes up in the mountain pass, we all revved our engines as a salute, I know Frank would appreciate that!
IMG_20130824_102452_349_zps40331efd.jpg
IMG_20130824_101752_511_zps02416fc8.jpg

That sounds absolutely appropriate and respectful for the culture reflected at the funerals you attended.

To Hudson Hawk's point though, I attended a funeral a few years back (fortunately the last one I've been to) in a pleasant suburb of Connecticut, for the brother of a friend who passed away. The deceased gentleman had been an accountant and I was stunned at how few suits and ties or even sport coats and ties were worn. My impression was less than ten percent. Whereas, most people wore jeans, cords or chinos and open neck or t-shirts and plenty of baseball caps and baseball-type jackets.

Part of me was initially offended at the lack of respect, but as I reflected on it more, the people there we solemn in tone, the conversation was only of praise for the deceased and the mood and tone was respectful. Of course, everyone there had made the effort to come and given of their time to be there to support his family, so in away, I thought, while I can't do it, I guess times have simply changed and this is what people now do. Visually, it looks, to my eye, less somber and elegant, less reflective of the gravity and dignity of the event, but again, the spoken words and demeanor were all highly respectful.

They come; they are respectful; they care and they want to support: modern culture just doesn't view dressing up in a suit and tie as part of the funeral norm anymore. I will always were a suit and tie to a funeral, but it seems that society has a different standard today.
 

Dan Allen

A-List Customer
Messages
395
Location
Oklahoma
"Quote Originally Posted by Stearmen View Post
I don't think you would have much luck with that at the last three funerals I attended! They were all for fellow motorcycle riders, we all rode of course and wore our club colors! By the way, the widows were all very pleased to see us. At one, after we scattered the ashes up in the mountain pass, we all revved our engines as a salute, I know Frank would appreciate that!"
I have no problem with that, as a matter of fact think it is "neat". In the case I mentioned, the gentleman being laid to rest was known to be impeccably dressed to attend other funerals yet I saw several attendees for his dressed in dirty shirts and faded bib overalls ---much more appropriate for the farm.
 

Michaelson

One Too Many
Messages
1,840
Location
Tennessee
The last funeral I attended was my brother-in-law last February. I wore a black 3 piece vested suit with gold vest chain and watch in honor of my friend and brother. I'm proud to say, everyone at the funeral home for visitation as well as funeral were like minded. It was refreshing to see people still remembered what they were there for......honor of a man, and to comfort his family.
Regards! Michaelson
 

1961MJS

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,370
Location
Norman Oklahoma
I don't think you would have much luck with that at the last three funerals I attended! They were all for fellow motorcycle riders, we all rode of course and wore our club colors! By the way, the widows were all very pleased to see us. At one, after we scattered the ashes up in the mountain pass, we all revved our engines as a salute, I know Frank would appreciate that!

Hi

Well, at a biker's funeral, riding a bike to spread the ashes, I think that wearing colors counts as appropriate funeral attire. Several Scout leader funerals are attended by 50 plus old fat guys (and some ladies) wearing full scout uniform. I haven't been to a Civil War Reenactor funeral, but I bet those aren't three piece suit either.

I would like to see a real suit be normal funeral and church attire again though.

Later
 
I don't think you would have much luck with that at the last three funerals I attended! They were all for fellow motorcycle riders, we all rode of course and wore our club colors! By the way, the widows were all very pleased to see us. At one, after we scattered the ashes up in the mountain pass, we all revved our engines as a salute, I know Frank would appreciate that!



I guess my beef is with people who make sure you understand what an inconvenience the deceased is to them. For you and your friends, this is obviously not the case, and actually have gone out of your way to show respect in a way that is meaningful to the deceased and his/her friends and family. I'm talking about people who dress as if they're put out by having attend.
 

Stearmen

I'll Lock Up
Messages
7,202
I should have mentioned, at my mothers funeral a few years back, I did wear a proper dark three peace suit and tie. Ironical, the largest funeral I ever attended, was for a friend I had known since the 70s. He was a sales person at the local Harley shop, when he passed away from a heart attack. We had a police escort to block off the side streets, must have been every motor officer in the city! Unfortunately, by the time we made it to the church, it was full, so I did not make it inside. Fortunately, my mother did, since she new him, and the widow since the 60s. Then we rode to the cemetary. Not sue what the people in their steal cages thought? I was told by the director of the cemetary who is a friend, that the biggest funeral during his time on the job, was a motorcycle gang funeral. The police did not block off the streets for them, needless to say!
 

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