The Era -- Day By Day

[LizzieMaine]

Just for the sake of reference, here's Walt and Phyllis's wedding -- June 24, 1926. Note five year old Skeezix, who is no doubt taking notes for the future.

It was very much the social event of that madcap roaring-20s summer, and even rated a full writeup on the News' Society Page.

So yeah, if I was Nina, I'd be worried. Oh, and I wonder how that business worked out with Spain and the League of Nations?

 

[ChiTownScion]

Weddings can become less about the couple and more about the in-laws/ family. The back & forth between Walt and Phyllis over the nuptials of Skeezix reminds me of the back & forth between my now wife and my father's second wife.

We always intended to pay for our own wedding: a somewhat smallish affair of about 100 guests total- all of our choosing- and a sit-down dinner. Open bar with top drawer liquor, a live band, unlimited champagne? Not on our priority list as we also wanted to honeymoon in Germany. But we wanted to feed our guests and serve what we always drank: soda pop, beer & wine.

My father's wife was willing to pay for a dinner for five times as many guests with all of the bells and whistles, the catch being that most of the guests would be her family, friends, and business associates. She reminded us that she had been invited to numerous weddings over the years and she needed to "repay" the courtesy. My mom was still alive at that time so there was that complication as well.

Things eventually came to a boil. My wife and her had it out, with her telling my wife, "This isn't YOUR wedding!"

My wife took the diplomatic option and quietly replied, "Actually, it is our wedding." (Her reflex was to yell, "You're damned lucky that you're even invited!")

I should note that differences were eventually resolved: my father's wife and my wife became close at the end of the former's life after she had suffered several reversals of fortune (lost her husband, her money, and she was dying of cancer). Dad & wife paid for a very nice rehearsal dinner, as well as a good portion of our formal dinnerware. The only wedding gripes, about our lack of an open bar (We served the soda pop, beer and wine on a Help Yourself basis.), was from an Irish cop cousin of mine who crabbed about there being no whiskey. Ah, well. Can't please everyone.

 

[LizzieMaine]

(Over on Ditmas Avenue, Bob the Spitz gazes at Mrs. Helen Browne with his big brown eyes and wonders if he should wait to be drafted or just go down and enlist.)

Russian troops are reported last night to have driven almost to within sight of Orel, important highway and railroad junction 210 miles south of Moscow. The town of Mtensk, 28 miles northeast of Orel, was reported to be in Russian hands, and Soviet guerillas are, according to the army newspaper Red Star, in effective control of the area surrounding Orel, striking by night German sentries and scattered battalions of troops in a ruthless campaign that is already said to have killed 4327 Nazi officers and men.

Sixty-two vulnerable points of Brooklyn will soon be guarded by 2000 veterans of the last war, clad in surplus Army uniforms of 1935 pattern. The "Patrol Corps," organized after discussions between Mayor LaGuardia, Army Lt. Colonel Henry P. Kirkham, and officials of the Police Department, will be assigned guard duties at electric power stations operated by the Board of Transportation, certain waterfront properties, points where power conduits are carried across streets, and other vital locations. Applications for service in the Patrol Corps are now being accepted by local service organizations, with officials noting that 3500 uniforms in various sizes are available, and are being sorted in a Manhattan loft in preparation for issue. Each volunteer will be issued a service coat, trousers, overseas cap, and overcoat, along with appropriate insignia, but will be required to furnish his own shirt, tie, and shoes.

Swing king Benny Goodman is honeymooning today with his new bride, the former Alice Hammond Duckworth. The 32-year-old idol of the jitterbugs wed the 36-year-old Eastern socialite in Las Vegas, Nevada yesterday at the Clark County Courthouse, with Judge George E. Marshall presiding. The marriage is the first for Mr. Goodman and the second for Mrs. Duckworth, who was divorced in Las Vegas last January 26th.

In Bayonne, New Jersey yesterday police intervened to prevent a mob from attacking an ambulance surgeon who had refused to climb a 25-foot ladder to rescue a steeplejack who had fallen onto a rooftop from the 55-foot-high smokestack he had been painting. Police stated that 30-year-old John Young of 333 W. 61st Street, Manhattan, had been working in a boatswain's chair lashed to the stack at the Baker Castor Oil Company factory when a block hook came loose and dropped Young to the roof of a boiler house thirty feet below. As Young lay on the roof, unable to move because of a broken leg and ankle, onlookers demanded that 45-year-old ambulance surgeon Dr. Paul Rudman climb a ladder to the roof to treat the fallen man, but Dr. Rudman declined to do so, citing "high blood pressure." The crowd of workmen became irate, and threatened the doctor, with a cry going up to "throw him in the bay." As police worked to calm the angered crowd, a second ambulance arrived, bringing Dr. Morris Schapiro, who ran up the ladder and treated Young, who was subsequently lowered from the rooftop on a stretcher. Dr. Schapiro further confirmed that Dr. Rudman does indeed suffer from high blood pressure, but it is expected that a report on the incident will be filed with the medical director of Bayonne Hospital.

A survey by the Eagle's own Card Carrying Investigator reveals that the average American now carries at least a dozen different identification documents on their person at any given moment. Most people carry a basic card giving their name and address for use in the event of an accident, and if you own or drive an automobile, you carry a driver's license and an auto insurance card. You also carry a Social Security card, and possibly also a hospitalization, or hospital insurance or medical plan card. You may also carry a union card, and cards denoting membership in various clubs, orders, or other organizations. And if you're a man, you're required by law to carry a Selective Service registration card, and a card bearing your draft number. And soon you will be carrying ration cards for sugar and gasoline. No doubt about it, today's American is a walking card index of impressive proportions!

(Of course, if you have a car that'll barely do 40 on a good day, that's half the battle right there.)

(Casey Proves Effecive = he didn't throw one into the backstop. And where's Ted Williams? I'm sure Johnny Welaj's mother loves him very much, but he's no Ted Williams.)

It is now reported that wasp-waisted Whit Wyatt will report to the Dodger camp at Daytona Beach tomorrow. J. Whitlow is still not officially signed, but it is strongly expected that he and Mr. MacPhail will bury their hatchet before too much more time passes, and the 1941 22-game winner will be back in uniform and working his way into form soon.

Dodger pitcher Newt Kimball holds the golfing crown at the Daytona camp, and his skill is reportedly such that even Manager Durocher hesitates to challenge him. Leo has loudly proposed a little golf-for-money to every other known linksman on the squad, but for some reason he gives Newt a wide berth. Leo does, however, continue to dominate the Dodgers at the pool table, and is also to be feared whenever cards are dealt.

(I'm sure she does call him "General." "Hey General, when you gonna RETURN to take out the garbage?")

Beauticians assembled for their annual convention in New York last week voted Miss Jinx Falkenburg America's Number One Brunette for 1942. Evelyn Keyes was cited as the top blonde of the year, with Rita Hayworth taking honors among the titian-topped.

Old Timer Meyer Berger remembers the old days in Bushwick where "lady prize fighters" were all the rage. Miss Lonie "Gussie" Freeman comes especially to mind. Gussie ran a "grog shop" at Cook Street and Bushwick Avenue back in the Nineties, and served as her own bouncer. She also worked as a longshorewoman when she wasn't fighting in the ring as a professional mauler. They still talk about her bout at the old Gayety Theatre against Hattie Leslie, another Dutchtowner, whom Gussie "wiped the floor" with.

Pert and piquant Nanette Fabray of Broadway's "Let's Face It" used to be named "Fabares" until she got tired of people pronouncing it "fab-a-ress." Or, even worse, "fa-berries," as in "razz-berries." But "Fab-a-ray" rhymes with "cab-a-ray," and that suites Nanette just fine.

You've seen him a thousand times in the movies, and that's not exaggeration. Froggy-voiced Eugene Pallette played his one thousandth film role in Warner Bros. recent picturization of "The Male Animal," but the rotund character comedian still isn't satisfied. Pallette, whose film career goes back to 1910, and who in 1928 starred in the very first all-talking picture, "The Lights Of New York," says his unrealized movie ambitions are to play Falstaff in Shakespeare's "King Henry IV" and the title role in "The Gentleman from Mississippi." Pallette used to be a romantic leading man in silent pictures until he gained too much weight. Then, for many years, he was typed as a detective, thanks to his role as the dumb dick in the Philo Vance series. And now you know him best as a frustrated millionaire father of a screwball family. "It's getting so," comments Pallette, "the first thing I ask when I get a script is 'who's my kids?"

(Aw, too bad. I think a Red Ryder-Mephistopheles team-up might make for a really good story.)

(No plans to have your charred bridgework passed around in a cigar box by Soviet medical analysts? Maybe you should think about it.)

(BB Eyes has branches in every city.)

(Poor Bill -- nothing worse than wasting a good rant. And "Gee Fritz" - oops, sorry, "Gee, Adolph!")

(Some are born to troll, some are born to be trolled...)

("Hey!" blurts Joe. "Where's Tarzan?" "T'camel got 'im," replies Sally. "What, ya couldn' see it comin?")

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"I ast ya t'look f'tat Kodak we had," grumbles Sally. "By t'time y'fin it, Leonora's gonna be in high school!" "I sweah," insists Joe, "t'las' time I seen'at Kodak was when I had it out t'Woil's Faieh -- remembeh, 'at time I was out fronna t'Twenny T'ousan' Legs Unna t' Sea, an' t'at guy runs inta me. He musta benna dip, annee got t' Kodak. Right outa my pocket! I had some good pitchas onnat fillum too." "Yeah," eyerolls Sally, "I betcha did." "I did," nods Joe. "Gargantua t' ape. I wennoveh an' took pitchas a' Gargantua t' ape. 'At's jus' what I done. Ask anybody." "I'll go right out an' do 'tat." "I hope 'at dip enjoyed t' pitchas. Hahd t'get good shots innat dim light."

At least nobody's hoarding toilet paper. Yet.

Certainly not. He's got to come up with a much better death trap.

Yeah, yeah, whatever. But Maw Green gives fascinating insight into Mr. Gray's own mindset -- even HE doesn't buy the stuff Annie's been dishing out since Nick "died."

Oh come on, you can't tell me that Andy got that decrepit in just 44 years.

C'mon, Pat, this is no time to be having fun.

And then the old lady says "hey, where's my cat???"

ALL RIGHT THEN. I wonder what our spring storyline will be about?

Pass the soap.

Actually, it's pretty sweet for Willie to give her some actual work for a birthday present. After all, it's only once a year.

 

[Fading Fast]

...

Swing king Benny Goodman is honeymooning today with his new bride, the former Alice Hammond Duckworth. The 32-year-old idol of the jitterbugs wed the 36-year-old Eastern socialite in Las Vegas, Nevada yesterday at the Clark County Courthouse, with Judge George E. Marshall presiding. The marriage is the first for Mr. Goodman and the second for Mrs. Duckworth, who was divorced in Las Vegas last January 26th.
...

Sounds like a Page Four marriage with a life expectancy of 6-18 months, but Benny and Alice were married for thirty-six years until her passing. I would have lost serious money on that bet.

...
(Casey Proves Effecive = he didn't throw one into the backstop. And where's Ted Williams? I'm sure Johnny Welaj's mother loves him very much, but he's no Ted Williams.)
...

Nice, Lizzie.

...

It is now reported that wasp-waisted Whit Wyatt will report to the Dodger camp at Daytona Beach tomorrow. J. Whitlow is still not officially signed, but it is strongly expected that he and Mr. MacPhail will bury their hatchet before too much more time passes, and the 1941 22-game winner will be back in uniform and working his way into form soon.

Fitz looks in the mirror, breathes in hard, pats his stomach, thinks a bit and says to himself, "screw it, so I'm not 'wasp-waisted,' let's see if he's still pitching and still 'wasp-waisted' at my age."

"Dear, you've been in the bathroom a long time, is everything okay?"

[Exhales] "I'll be right out."

By the way, have I missed it, has Fitz pitched or been mentioned recently?

...
Beauticians assembled for their annual convention in New York last week voted Miss Jinx Falkenburg America's Number One Brunette for 1942. Evelyn Keyes was cited as the top blonde of the year, with Rita Hayworth taking honors among the titian-topped.
...

Day-by-Day favorite Jinx Falkenburg says thank you.

In 1942, most movies and newspapers were in B&W. I'd bet not that many people even knew stars' hair color.

And in the Daily News...

"I ast ya t'look f'tat Kodak we had," grumbles Sally. "By t'time y'fin it, Leonora's gonna be in high school!" "I sweah," insists Joe, "t'las' time I seen'at Kodak was when I had it out t'Woil's Faieh -- remembeh, 'at time I was out fronna t'Twenny T'ousan' Legs Unna t' Sea, an' t'at guy runs inta me. He musta benna dip, annee got t' Kodak. Right outa my pocket! I had some good pitchas onnat fillum too." "Yeah," eyerolls Sally, "I betcha did." "I did," nods Joe. "Gargantua t' ape. I wennoveh an' took pitchas a' Gargantua t' ape. 'At's jus' what I done. Ask anybody." "I'll go right out an' do 'tat." "I hope 'at dip enjoyed t' pitchas. Hahd t'get good shots innat dim light."
...

Page Four has a particular animus for Ms. Webb.

...

Yeah, yeah, whatever. But Maw Green gives fascinating insight into Mr. Gray's own mindset -- even HE doesn't buy the stuff Annie's been dishing out since Nick "died."
...

"Handyman, driver, new number-one boy, yes, yes, good, good, umm, do you also have a rug?"

...

ALL RIGHT THEN. I wonder what our spring storyline will be about?
...

Nah, he'll get her back next week. He's better at the chase than the hold.

...

Pass the soap.
...

I'm not losing sleep over Cindy being behind bars.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Fitz was supposed to pitch in an exhibition game last week -- but he did not, and no explanation was given. We know that his knee is all healed, and we know that he has energy enough to wrestle around on the practice field with Pee Wee, so an explanation ought to be offered if he can't appear. A summer without astonishing spot starts from Mr. Fitzsimmons hardly bears considering.

 

[LizzieMaine]

(You might recall that Mr. Gurino, known variously as "The Torpedo" and as "Socko," when arrested, flew into a violent spasming tantrum that required him to be carried away by a group of burly detectives. Mr. Gurino is, you will imagine, a Warner Bros. movie come to life.)

Russia is equipping its fliers with American-built Aircobra pursuit planes in preparation for the spring campaign, it was disclosed today by Moscow. Enough of the planes, known in the U. S. Army as P-39s, have been provided to equip an entire regiment of the Red Air Force, and Soviet fliers praise the ships as superior to the vaunted German Messerschmitts.

Japanese bomber and pursuit squadrons operating from new bases in the Irrawaddy Delta battled for aerial command of Burma today while their ground forces massed along the Sittang River front for anticipated thrusts northward toward Mandalay and westward across the rugged Pegu Yoma mountains. A heavy Japanese air attack was also reported on an Allied airdrome "somewhere in southern Burma."

A caravan of cars and trucks leaves Pasadena, California today to mark the departure of the first large contingent of Japanese aliens and their American-born children to evacuate strategic Pacific Coast military zones under the orders of the U. S. Army. Approximately 1000 evacuees assembled at dawn at the famous Rose Bowl stadium, with scores departing by train and bus, and by nightfall more than 1500 persons are expected to arrive at Mazanar in the Owens River Valley where the Army is constructing a reception center. All of the evacuees in the first group are men, and include cooks, bakers, carpenters, plumbers, and other skilled tradesmen who volunteered to begin the enforced migration. Evacuees who chose to do so were allowed to drive to Mazanar in their own cars, along with their personal belongings. The automobiles will then be impounded by the Government after the trip. Removal of the first group begins a process that will eventually relocate 112,985 Japanese on the West Coast away from the exclusion zone, with Lieutentant General John L. DeWitt, who ordered the evacuation earlier this month, estimating that the process will take approximately four to six weeks. Most of the evacuees are expected to move voluntarily, but "all will be moved, by force if necessary." Evacuation of German and Italian aliens will also take place, but at a later time.

The newest glamor girl of the American kitchen? You know her well -- her name is "Macaroni!" But you might not recognize her in her many frilly new form, with fancy shapes and unusual designs now being introduced to break up her former monotony. The old familiar tubes and elbows are still around, but you'll also find little macaroni curlicues shaped like snails or seashells, and long thin corkscrew sticks, and even pretty little lovers' knots with elegantly piqued edging. Each style sells in its own package for just fifteen cents a pound, and makes an ideal meal when served with cheese, anchovies. and your favorite spaghetti sauce.

(As Joe and Sally clatter home on the BMT from a trip to Loew's Met, Joe pulls at his collar. "I hate gettin' dressed up jus t' see a moom pitcha. Y'ain'gotta put on no necktie t' go t' t' RKO Dykeh. Or evenna Patio!" "T'at was a punk show," huffs Sally. "'Maginnnat Kat'rine Hepboin not knowin' nutt'n 'bout baseball. I ask ya!" "Imaginnat," sighs Joe. "No goin' downa canny stoeh all times a' day an' night t'call up Larry MacPhail. No moonin' oveh no hokey secon' baseman.." "What?" whats Sally. "Nut'n,." "I bet t'at characteh she was playin', t'at newspapeh dame, t'at was s'posta be Kilgallen. Ya know?" "Prob'ly," eyerolls Joe. "I'm soiten of it." nods Sally. "Kilgallen neveh knowed nut'n 'bout baseball. Woul'n know Dixie Walkeh from a Dixie cup.")

(You don't go to bed with the Devil without...)

(A published collection of Lichty's homefront cartoons might just be the most valuable documentation of WWII American life ever prepared.)

(Remember a couple years ago when Leo's training regimen for J. Whitlow had him riding around and around and around the field on a bicycle? That's how he got to be "wasp waisted.")

In Los Angeles, home runs by Pete Coscarart, Vince DiMaggio, and Bob Elliot accounted for four of the Pirates' six runs as Pittsburgh thumped the Philadelphia Athletics 6-2. It was the Mackmen's 11th defeat in 18 spring-training games.

("HA!" hahs Sally. "T'is is oueh stop," sighs Joe.)

("Strange -- AS IT SEEMS!")

(No, seriously, I've had nights like this too.)

("But all you dopes in second class, go ahead -- what have you go to to lose?")

(All right, that's the cutest horned toad I've ever seen. GIK!)

(Yeah, Dan, you smirk your smirk. Just wait'll an army of enraged pigeons descends upon you to avenge the torture of their comrade.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"Sophocles J. Soubardi." Is Fred Allen writing real life now?

C'mon, I wanna see the bridal photos.

The miracle of BB Eyes is that he makes up all this stuff on the fly.

Wait, isn't this that same ex-thug who used to hang around Sam the Presser's place? They all look alike to me.

Don't leave it running too long, those things get terrible gas mileage.

"Let's see if he left any more clues. Drop your pants."

You had your chance and you blew it. Still time to go down and enlist.

This had to have been sketched from real life. It just had to have been.

Nothing good ever started with "hide in the bedroom while I try to get rid of him."

"Brick SMOKEhouses." I always admire Mr. Willard's skill in skirting around the edge of saying something -- earthy -- without actually saying it.

 

[Fading Fast]

...
(As Joe and Sally clatter home on the BMT from a trip to Loew's Met, Joe pulls at his collar. "I hate gettin' dressed up jus t' see a moom pitcha. Y'ain'gotta put on no necktie t' go t' t' RKO Dykeh. Or evenna Patio!" "T'at was a punk show," huffs Sally. "'Maginnnat Kat'rine Hepboin not knowin' nutt'n 'bout baseball. I ask ya!" "Imaginnat," sighs Joe. "No goin' downa canny stoeh all times a' day an' night t'call up Larry MacPhail. No moonin' oveh no hokey secon' baseman.." "What?" whats Sally. "Nut'n,." "I bet t'at characteh she was playin', t'at newspapeh dame, t'at was s'posta be Kilgallen. Ya know?" "Prob'ly," eyerolls Joe. "I'm soiten of it." nods Sally. "Kilgallen neveh knowed nut'n 'bout baseball. Woul'n know Dixie Walkeh from a Dixie cup.")
...

Thank you for having them go - dressed up and all. The oversized hat at the baseball game is obliviously perfect - we've all sat behind "that" woman at some time or another. I love when Joe gets in his digs and then backs off just enough that it can all slide by. Wait till Sally meets Kilgallen next time she goes for blood or, back then, would someone like Kilgallen not be able to get into nursing school?

...


(You don't go to bed with the Devil without...)
...

Hitler had an odd affinity for Mussolini. Man, we read it everyday, attacking Soviet Russia was the worse decision Hitler made. That was the definitive mistake.

...

(No, seriously, I've had nights like this too.)
...

I think Punjab moved in next door.

...

(Yeah, Dan, you smirk your smirk. Just wait'll an army of enraged pigeons descends upon you to avenge the torture of their comrade.)

The bright orange feathers has to make you think. What the heck? How'd that happen? It's not like they had Cheetos back then.

......

C'mon, I wanna see the bridal photos.
...

Ms. Compton with some clothes on:

...

Don't leave it running too long, those things get terrible gas mileage.
...

Plus, I imagine, a 1940s tank doesn't idle quietly.

...

"Brick SMOKEhouses." I always admire Mr. Willard's skill in skirting around the edge of saying something -- earthy -- without actually saying it.

"A headache"

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Whattat'ey need double deck buses in Jackson Heights anyways?" says Joe. "Ain' nut'n t'see in Jackson Heights!" "Well, my cousin Hazel lives in Jackson Heights," notes Sally. "You know, married t'tat guy woiks inna pencil eraseh fact'ry. He's inna soivice now. He says he's gonna rub out Hitleh." "Yeah," nods Joe. "But he ain' gonna do it in Jackson Heights.")

German forces are resisting the Soviet drive with new fury today, throwing planes, tanks, and men that had been held in reserve for the Spring offensive against the unrelenting Red Army, as Russia reports new successes, especially along the Northern front. Having surrounded what is described as "an ancient walled city," believed to be Novogrod, 110 miles southeast of Leningrad, the Soviet command in their midnight communique reported killing another 1800 Nazis over the past two days fighting along the Leningrad front.

The House today is trying to decide whether to vote on restrictive wartime labor legislation now, or after its forthcoming Easter break. Pending before the House is a bill that would outlaw the 40 hour work week and outlaw the closed shop in war industries, while also placing a cap of 6 percent profit over the cost of each defense contract. The bill sponsored by Rep. Howard W. Smith (D-W Va.) faces strong opposition in the chamber, and is also opposed by War Prodution Board chairman Donald L. Nelson, who testified before the House yesterday that the proposed restrictions would do nothing to improve war production work. Leaders of the CIO met yesterday to pass a resolution opposing the Smith bill, charging that congressional efforts to reverse advances won by labor in recent years are being made at the instance of Axis agents "seeking to stimulate hysteria and panic Congress and the press."

(Yes, this is all very productive.)

Despite the fall of Rangoon and the cutting of the railroad link to the Burma Road, the Chinese have stored away 200,000 tons of war materials in the mountains along the China-Burma border, enough to keep the trucks moving for two years. News of those caches came yesterday from Dr. John Earl Baker, former director general of the Burma Road, who arrived here accompanied by 504 refugees from the Far East. The refugees included 396 Americans, some of whom were women and children. Dr. Baker had served as Inspector General for the Chinese government from March of last year until American military authorities took over that function.

Former Republican presidential nominee Wendell L. Willkie expressed concern, in a magazine article released today, that the American people have not yet fully come to understand that this war "is their struggle." Writing in the current issue of Look magazine, Mr. Willkie also criticized the Roosevelt Administration for not "telling the entire truth" about the scope of damage done to the U. S. fleet in the attack on Pearl Harbor, and about the true severity of the present rubber shortage. Mr. Willkie expressed his belief that the Allies will win the war, but stressed that he is "deeply troubled" by the present attitude of the American people/

(Oh boy, Kings Row is finally here. Joe and Sally can't wait to see it.)

("Daddy, what did you do in the war?" "I sat here and answered a bunch of damfool questions. Go bother your mother.")

("Medwick has not overcome his habit of pulling away from the plate when the opposing pitcher is a righthander and throwing sidearm." GEE I WONDER WHAT COULD HAVE HAPPENED TO CAUSE THAT? Oh, and we've got Frenchy Bordagaray back? Frenchy who Casey Stengel got rid of because "there's only room for one clown on this club?" Won't Leo be happy!)

("You say if you don't get treatments from a cosmic ray whoozis at regular intervals you'll shrink away to nothingness? Sorry son! 4-F!)

("What? No, that's just my regular face.")

(And they lived happily ever after...)

(Yeah, this happened to my mother once, except instead of a cute li'l burro in the front seat, it was me.)

(YOU MEAN IRWIN DID SOMETHING RIGHT??? WOW THE WAR REALLY IS CHANGING AMERICA!)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

We need one of those tidy Daily News charts to show all the interconnections in the Webb-Shonbrun-Reich case. Get the art department busy.

Smile!

"That's right Chuck, all on the same team. Just don't cross me, Chuck. Don't cross me. And we'll all be on the same team."

"We'll seal Tracy and his pal in giant canning jars! Yeah that's it! A nice big batch of Cop Jelly!"

"You wouldn't know any circus freaks would you? I mean, I just assumed..."

Honey and Goofy, The Later Years.

C'mon, Walt -- point out that according to Emily Post, it's the bride's family who plans the wedding. I dare ya.

No. Nonononono.

And this is why Moon is banned from every pawn shop in town.

It just occured to me that Sandhurst always looks like the before picture in an ad for All-Bran. That explains a lot.

 

[Fading Fast]

...
("Whattat'ey need double deck buses in Jackson Heights anyways?" says Joe. "Ain' nut'n t'see in Jackson Heights!" "Well, my cousin Hazel lives in Jackson Heights," notes Sally. "You know, married t'tat guy woiks inna pencil eraseh fact'ry. He's inna soivice now. He says he's gonna rub out Hitleh." "Yeah," nods Joe. "But he ain' gonna do it in Jackson Heights.")
...

Joe does get in some good ones.

..
(Oh boy, Kings Row is finally here. Joe and Sally can't wait to see it.)
...

They'd be better off staying home, saving the money and reading the war news from the Pacific, it's cheerier.

...

(And they lived happily ever after...)
...

I want to see Page Four's take on this. It won't be as nice.

And in the Daily News...

We need one of those tidy Daily News charts to show all the interconnections in the Webb-Shonbrun-Reich case. Get the art department busy.
...

That would be great; the News is really good at those.

I love the daily commentary of Ms. Webb's grooming that the News couldn't resist noting on, in an, otherwise, newsy article.

...

Smile!
...

One assumes this is from when he was 260lbs. He's probably smiling in the 190lbs pic.

...

"That's right Chuck, all on the same team. Just don't cross me, Chuck. Don't cross me. And we'll all be on the same team."
...

"Ran stuff over th' border for a spell." He had to be working for Nick. Maybe Gray's taking baby steps to bring our man back.

I'm ready when you guys are.

"What? Oh yes, Sandy, great acting with your eyes in panel two." [sotto voce] "All these actors have such fragile egos." [louder] "Nothing, just saying you did great, stole the panel." [sotto voce again] "And all I get is 15%."

...

"We'll seal Tracy and his pal in giant canning jars! Yeah that's it! A nice big batch of Cop Jelly!"
...

Lovely thought, Lizzie.

I've resisted until now, but B-B Eyes needs to read this:

The Fedora Lounge Rulebook for Killing a TV, Movie or Comic-Strip Enemy: "Always kill your enemy as fast as you can and, then, check carefully to make sure he or she is dead."

...

It just occured to me that Sandhurst always looks like the before picture in an ad for All-Bran. That explains a lot.

Umm, Mr. Japanese Lieutenant, it's probably best not to tell them your plan.

If Pat isn't trying to come up with a way to get Normandie and Merrily away and leave Sandhurst behind, I'm going to be very disappointed.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Mr. Gurino looks like one of those newspaper photos you'd pick up with Silly Putty and distort into hilarious shapes, only for real.

I'd like very much to know what happened to Nick's "organization" once Mr. Gatt took his unfortunate powder. Perhaps Chuck can fill us in on that. Maybe Tecum's running it now, having had an epiphany after surviving his ordeal at sea, in which case you can see why Chuck left.

Somebody on the News staff really has a burn on for Miss Webb. They've never been this snarky about anyone else, and it suggests a more personal interest in the case than professionalism would warrant.

If Sandhurst doesn't end up on his knees with a pistol pressed against the back of his skull there is no justice in the world, but I don't think the comics page is quite ready to go there.

 

[PrivateEye]

The Fedora Lounge Rulebook for Killing a TV, Movie or Comic-Strip Enemy: "Always kill your enemy as fast as you can and, then, check carefully to make sure he or she is dead."

I was wondering when someone would bring this up...

 

[LizzieMaine]

("I ain' takin' no rap f'nobody!" retorts 18-year-old Florence Kohlman of Bushwick. "Can't a goil go inta business f'he'self wit'out bein' judged?")

Japanese forces on the Bataan Peninsula were believed today to be arriving for a quick knockout of American and Filipino resistance before the start of the Philippine rainy season next month. Supported by "new type" bombers never seen before on any other front, the Japanese were reported lashing out at General Jonathan M. Wainwright's outnumbered defenders by land and air in what military experts regarded as the start of the long-awaited big offensive. "It looks like they've pulled the trigger on their big push at last," stated one War Department commentator. The Philippine rainy season marked by torrential tropical downpours begins during the latter part of April or the early part of May, and annually turns the Bataan Peninsula into a quagmire.

Allied losses in the three-day battle of the Java Sea, biggest naval engagement of the war so far, rose to fifteen warships today with the disclosure that the 1190-ton destroyers Pillsbury and Edsall were lost in the battle, presumably with the full loss of their crews of totaling about 290 officers and men. The loss of the Pillsbury and the Edsall, both World War-era vessels, brings to 23 the number of U. S. warships, transports, supply ships, and auxiliaries lost in all naval action since the war began.

All property owners will be compelled to install firefighting equipment to combat incendiary bombs under a City Council measure expected soon to be passed in the wake of a call by Mayor LaGuaria for prompt action on such a law. The bill introduced before the Council by Manhattan Fusionist Stanley M. Isaacs requires the installation in all buildings of stirrup pumps, pails, shovels, and sand, with fines of $500 or six months imprisonment per violation levied on property owners who fail to comply. All structures, including residential, commercial, and waterfront property, will be subject to the measure. A public hearing on the proposed law takes place before the Council's Defense Committee Friday at 2 PM at City Hall.

("A tightened belt is a belt at Hitler!")

Brooklyn's quota is $500,000 in the annual campaign of the Greater New York Fund, as solicitors prepare to visit several thousand of the borough's firms and factories to aid residents facing economic difficulty and displacement due to the war. "New York, with its emphasis on consumer and service industries is bound to suffer from wartime priorities," noted Brooklyn campaign chairman Albert W. Wright, vice president of the New York Telephone Company. Predicting that up to 600,000 people citywide may lose their jobs over the year ahead, Mr. Wright stressed that in wartime, helping such persons "becomes a matter of national necessity."

("Ooooo-weee," exhales Joe, eyes still wide. "I'm glad WE don' live in no small town." "Ya don' see nonna t'at in Flatbush," sighs Sally. "Midwood, maybe. But not Flatbush.")

Reader Irene M. Naylor writes in to complain about the disrespectful attitude shown by many when the National Anthem is performed to start the show in movie theatres. "Women chatter the whole time," she charges, "and children clap and whistle when the flag is shown on the screen." She urges theatre managers to precede the anthem with a slide warning patrons to refrain from applause until the end, and to sing the anthem respectfully and "from the heart."

(Now, if you had a Chrysler, you wouldn't NEED an air raid shelter.)

Murder-for-Hire figure Irving "Knadles" Nitzberg has appealed his second conviction for the murder of Albert Shuman in Brooklyn. The move automatically postpones Nitzberg's execution in the Sing Sing electric chair, originally scheduled for early June.

(Yeah, well, sorry, but you don't win a pennant if your ace is Newt Kimball. And hey Frenchy, where's your moustache?)

The Bushwicks will open their season at Dexter Park in Woodhaven on April 5th. Owner Max Rosner says his boys and their manager Joe Press have been working out on their local grounds despite the weather, and will be ready to kick off their campaign on Easter Sunday. Opposition has not yet been announced, but will likely be the Lancaster Red Roses. Along with the cream of semi-pro talent from around the Northeast, the Bushwicks will also again face outstanding Negro and touring clubs.

The World's Most Perfectly Developed Man will face his opposite number tonight at 9pm over WEAF when body-builder Charles Atlas guests on the Eddie Cantor program.

(Might want to change out of that unifor....oh, never mind.)

(There's a first time for everything.)

(Tom enlisting? Things CAN'T be THAT desperate!)

(Mr. Arriola really likes to draw.)


(Don't be ridiculous, what would a pigeon do with a radio station?)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Gloria will be better off without this louse.

Aren't you cold?

Jeez, Chuck, you always this passive-aggressive?

Well, whatever it is, I'm sure it'll be entertaining.

"But even there you gotta be careful. I mean, that Kaltenborn puts me right to sleep."

Well, I guess that's just about enough.

Well, it can't be the radio. "Chandu The Magician" went off the air years ago.

I dunno that Gootch, Spud, and Whimpy will care much about an elaborate wedding. Trixie might like it though.

They go bald early too.

Uncle Willie = Odalisque.

 

[Fading Fast]

("I ain' takin' no rap f'nobody!" retorts 18-year-old Florence Kohlman of Bushwick. "Can't a goil go inta business f'he'self wit'out bein' judged?")
...

I had the exact same thought - who says it isn't her business? Nothing could be more 1942 Brooklyn perfect than an 18-year-old female bookie. Also, how much do you love the package of betting slips being tossed to her from the factory window?

I know I've told this story before, but when I worked on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange in the 1980s, the head floor clerk for the firm I worked for was also a bookmaker. He took "action" all day long and kept track of the bets on the same order slips we used for stock trades (he kept the betting slips in one pocket and the stock orders in another).

One day, he mixed them up so he and I stayed late. We sat on the floor of the Exchange with hundreds of slips in a big pile in front of us that we went through one by one to separated them out. It's funny now, but quite stressful at the time, as we needed to get the stock trade slips up to the firm because they had to be reconciled before the day ended. The head clerk (in his mid 50s them) referred to himself as "just a kid from Brooklyn who done good."

...

(Tom enlisting? Things CAN'T be THAT desperate!)
...

They'll give him a mid-level job on "Stars and Stripes" where he can't do too much harm.

...

(Don't be ridiculous, what would a pigeon do with a radio station?)

"He painted the pigeons orange?"
"No, he coated them with something that turned them orange in sunlight"
"That Dan is a smart fellow."
"He certainly is. Now turn out the light Harrington."

And in the Daily News...

Gloria will be better off without this louse.
...

Guys like Pisciotta should just shut up about their pay differential considering the average grunt who is drafted and takes a pay cuts just has to suck it up.

Oddly, despite having had six marriages that all ended in divorce over her lifetime, George Montgomery and Hedy never make it down the aisle.

I hope Ms. Webb is getting her hair and nails done on this, apparent, day off from that story.

...

Well, I guess that's just about enough.
...

Just when you thought Sandhurst couldn't sink any lower. I love Normandie's gesture of disgust in panel four. It looks like a combination of "this guy is total scum, yet I married him" disgust.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("I KNEEEEEEEEEWWWWW t'eah was sump'n phoney 'bout t'at guy!" bellows Joe, slapping the paper on the table in disgust. "We neveh had nut'n like t'at at..." begins Sally, but Joe cuts her off. "Ohhhhh, t'ey did too. T'ey jus' neveh got CAUGHT! Ohhhhh, I'm goin' down'eah tamarra, an' I'm gonna deman' a REFUN'!" "But night school don't cost nut'n!" "Well'en, I'm gonna go downeah an' make a donation -- an'nen I'm gonna ask for it back!")

A Soviet officer reported today that a gigantic battle was raging today between Leningrad and Novgorod on the northern front, as the 16th German Army's beleaguered tenure at Staraya Rus is nearing its end. Soviet flyers shot down 11 German plans and damaged two others in a sky battle over the far northern port of Murmansk, with, at one time, more than a hundred planes engaged in furious air combat over the city.

Provided no further changes are made in plans to redraw Brooklyn's political map, Congressman Emanuel Celler, veteran Demcrat, has been safely restored to his domain. Original plans for redrawing congressional district lines would have placed Celler's home on McDonough Street within the district whose seat is now held by Rep. Andrew Somers, with the boundary being a matter of less than a city block from the Celler residence. The boundary has been adjusted to place Rep. Celler's residence within his present Congressional district, which includes portions of Bedford-Stuyvesant and much of Brownsville.

American expatriate Jane Anderson, who has broadcast propaganda for some months over the Berlin shortwave channels, is off the air, the apparent result of American broadcasters picking up her program and relaying it back to Germany. Miss Anderson, daughter of a well-to-do Georgia family, had made a broadcast attacking "false reports" of food shortages in Berlin by describing a recent lush luncheon she had enjoyed at a Berlin cocktail bar, a report likely not well-received by German civilians presently dining on ersatz beer and black bread.

(Keep 'em flying, kids!)

The problem of unequal wage standards for men and women working at the same jobs is one of the grimmest realities facing women now engaged in defense work, according to Miss Mary Anderson, director of the Women's Bureau of the U. S. Department of Labor. Speaking to a regional meeting of the Catholic Council on Industrial Problems, Miss Anderson stressed that a fair wage standard without regard for sex is "the very essence of democracy." In addition to the essential question of fairness, Miss Anderson noted that such a policy will also prevent employers from using the threat of female labor to undermine the wages paid to men. Miss Anderson further stated that an equal wage for equal work policy should be enforced not just upon the defense industry, but upon all sectors of the labor market.

(Oh, that's what it is. I thought they forgot to rinse out the jar first. Jarred cottage cheese is one of many products formerly sold in wax-paper containers or tin cans now being sold in glass due to wartime shortages. Hey Mr. Sheffield, how's that paper milk carton thing coming along?)

(Eugene Pallette wonders if he can get a job modelling for Lichty, but then he realizes he has too much hair.)

Six Germans and eleven Italians are interned today at Ellis Island after a raid on their homes by FBI agents netted "huge quantities" of contraband, including firearms, more than a thousand rounds of ammunition, eighteen shortwave radios, sixteen still cameras, two movie cameras, other photographic equipment, and quantities of "subversive literature." The seventeen prisoners were taken into custody at their homes near the Naval Air Base at the former Floyd Bennett Field, and near Fort Tilden.

Magistrate Charles Solomon yesterday turned away a 37-year-old Flatbush man who walked into the Bergen Street precinct station and asked to be arrested for vagrancy. Telling police he had no home, Alton Walker stated that he had been living on what money he had, which has now been exhausted and therefore he felt that he might has well turn himself in rather than wait to be picked up on the street, or charged with some other crime he might find himself forced to commit. Magistrate Solomon concluded that "legal unemployment and moral derelictiono" are prerequisites for a vagrancy charge, and therefore there were no grounds to hold Walker. The Magistrate referred Walker to the court's probation department in hopes of "rehabilitating" him.

(The Browns are, in fact, a much better club than they seem from the standings. Harland Clift is as good as any third baseman anywhere, Gutteridge and McQuinn are solid players, and Junior Stephens is a young future star. And we know all about Roy Cullenbine, DON'T WE LARRY? Meanwhile, "Joe has not gotten over being beaned two years ago and probably never will." What do you think of that, Leo? Huh?)

(Look, dummox, at least take off the swastikas and crap.)

"OH DON'T SHAKE YOUR HEAD!" "I'm not shaking my head, it does that all by itself.")

(Don't look so excited, toots -- he's just an ensign. He'll be initialing reports and shuffling papers and bringing coffee to lieutenant commanders who don't even know his name.)

(Point of order: shouldn't that be a peso sign?)

"WHOM he talks to." Very good, Dan Dunn, English Major.

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

"In Brooklyn where they talk of the Dodgers all year round, there was more than a usual amount of bull yesterday." "Hey Mac, all your bulls are jumping out!" I love the Daily News.

Hey Jimmy, go ask some Boston sportswriters.

"Me? Well, I was dumped here by my billionaire adopted daddy, who went off on a plane with his sidekicks, the wizard and the assassin, and never came back. Seemed kinda funny at the time, but, you know, that's my daddy."

Ahhh, Patrick, you do know how to make an entrance.

Never mind Min, look out for the air raid warden.

You can't get married on $21 a day once a month.

If you think Tony Sandhurst is bad, get a load of his brother.

If this storyline leads into Shadow having a full-on nervous breakdown, it should make the Sunday pages very interesting.

Earlier this week, I found myself sitting across the desk from a bank manager, looking for a loan, but I must admit I never considered climbing across the desk to intimidate him. I'll be sure to keep in mind for next time.

Gawdluvya, B-B.

 

[LizzieMaine]

And speaking of Mr. Theo. S. Ballgame and his problems with the press...

The baseball figure who claimed his high-powered dressmaker wife as a dependent is no less than Leo E. Durocher himself. Mr. Powers likes to live dangerously.

Oh, and Jimmy, no mention of one H. A. Lavagetto, with a III-A deferment who enlisted anyway?