The Era -- Day By Day

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

("The Chair? NO THANKS I'LL STAND!")

Mr. Gable's earnings can be expected to drop considerably by the time next year's list comes out.

"Oh, and since I am, in fact, your commanding officer, you will call me, as the others do -- 'Master.'"

I mean, I'm sure Arthur Pollock is very concerned about the dramatic club at Erasmus.

There's a fine line between "plucky" and "irresponsibly stupid."

You don't read the papers, kid, do you?

All right, now stop it.

"And when I *do* go in the service, I'll have these swell photos to keep me company!"

"Put me in with Madeline Webb. I want to pick up some pointers."

Aren't you cold?

 

[Fading Fast]

(You can't tell me, after everything we see here pretty much every day, that the life of a bookie is less profitable than the life of a burglar. Mr. Taranto needs to go into a legitimate business, like running a candy store.)
...

Could not agree more. Maybe he did something that got the "bosses" to put him out of the bookmaking business so burglary was his only "career option" left.

"...and the sneak thief, John Cullen." "Sneak thief?"

...

Uprisings against the Gestapo spread today to Norway, where a second Nazi leader was targeted by patriot-assassins. The Norwegians are reported in dispatches from Stockholm to have shot and killed "one of the principal Gestapo officials for western Norway," on Sotra Island off the coast of Bergen. Nazi occupation authorities responded to the assassination by arresting the entire population of the small village where the slaying occurred, confiscating all livestock, and burning the entire town to the ground. The assassination of the Norwegian official follows by a day the attempted assassination in Czechoslovakia of Reinhard "The Hangman" Heydrich, second only in the Gestapo to Heinrich Himmler, who was gravely wounded by partisans on Tuesday.
...

Hollywood made an excellent fictional version of this event in the 1943 movie "Edge of Darkness" starring Ann Sheridan and Errol Flynn (comments on the movie here: #29,434 )

...

(Keeping clean is very important when you can turn invisible.)
...

Yes, a ripe odor would be a dead giveaway. Hence, today's strip (ha-ha) was very meta-character advancing and not cheesecake. Uh-huh.

...


("And unless you do exactly as I say, you know which photo I'll use!")
...

"Although [said leering at Leona], you're not showing much less right now, but I doubt you want the, umm, déclassé implications of that photo to get out, do you Mrs. Future First Lady?"

And in the Daily News...

("The Chair? NO THANKS I'LL STAND!")
...

It's stunning how the newspapers continue to frame this story as "...Madeline Webb and her two partners." It's open to argument, but if there was a leader, it seems to have been Shonbrun.

...

"Put me in with Madeline Webb. I want to pick up some pointers."
...

Are you suggesting the jury won't believe Shonbrun's confession?

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Good night, sweet prince.")

With District Attorney William O'Dwyer going on active duty as a Major in the U. S. Army as of Monday, his chief assistant Thomas Craddock Hughes has been officially designated as Acting District Attorney until his return or until the conclusion of his term on December 31, 1943. Mr. O'Dwyer completed his last day on the job at the Municipal Building yesterday, taking leave of the staff to depart for Governor's Island, where he will take up his duties with the Provost Marshal's office. Major O'Dwyer's $20,000 per year city salary ended as of his departure yesterday, but he will draw Army pay of about $5000 per year.

The supply minister to Australia's militant Labor government sees no legal reason to bar the return to his home country of Harry Bridges, longshoremen's union chief ordered deported from the United States by Attorney General Francis Biddle. Minister J. A. Beasley called Bridges "the greatest social reformer ever seen here," but noted that the desirability of the residence of any particular person in any particular country is "a matter for that country to decide."

(No matter how far away you are, you're never far away.)

(Sigh. Maybe it's too soon to say so, but I can't shake the feeling that Page Four will never be the same.)

("But hey -- pork chops for supper!")

(ED HEAD! ED H--what a bum! And do you get the feeling that Mr. Holmes and Mr. Werber aren't going out for a drink after the game?)

(Mr. Cagney has the instinctive understanding that the only way to make hokum work is to go for it 100 percent. And he does.)

(Kind of a low stakes game, isn't it?)

(Yes. Yes he is.)

(Are you sure? A month into the Blackston Administration, Aunt Mary would burn down the White House.)

(OK NOW IT'S YOUR TURN TO WEAR THE HANDCUFFS!)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Upstaged.

I'll say this for Shonbrun. He's a hell of an actor.

Kids Today.

HONK! HONK! IT'S THE BONK!

Nick has a sub! Nick has a sub! Well, anyway, he should.

"A transcription series, you say? Hmph. Some has-been."

"Congratulations on your enlistment, Private Wallet. You're being assigned to the Quartermaster Corps. Get busy and sort these pants."

You notice she's stopped calling him "Handsome One."

Tomorrow: Honey joins the WAACs.

"Bail? Just put it on my account."

 

[LizzieMaine]

And a final salute to one of our favorites.

You never appreciate what you've got till it's gone.

 

[Fading Fast]

...


(Sigh. Maybe it's too soon to say so, but I can't shake the feeling that Page Four will never be the same.)
...

He had a good line about his wives and first editions.

...

(ED HEAD! ED H--what a bum! And do you get the feeling that Mr. Holmes and Mr. Werber aren't going out for a drink after the game?)
...

It is part of the joy and agony of baseball how fast an inning and a game can get away from a team.

...

I'll say this for Shonbrun. He's a hell of an actor.
...

Thoughts on the verdicts?

...

Nick has a sub! Nick has a sub! Well, anyway, he should.
...

Uh, umm, er, where's the stunt dog? STUNT DOG! STUNT DOG!

...

You notice she's stopped calling him "Handsome One."
...

"Heaven has no rage like love to hate turned, nor hell a fury like a woman scorned." - William Congreve

Heck, Ryan didn't even give her a "beautiful" today.

...

Tomorrow: Honey joins the WAACs.
...

One less in Shadow's way.

And a final salute to one of our favorites.

You never appreciate what you've got till it's gone.

Makes his nearly four-minute suicide scene in "Dinner at Eight" even more poignant (starts at 9:50 in, but the lead up in the full scene is powerful too).

 

[LizzieMaine]

Madeline is either the greatest actress of her generation, or a mental case. I'm inclined to think the latter, so execution is probably not the way to go for her. But she was clearly as involved as the rest of them in what happened, based on what we've been given in the trial, so I think the jury called it right here. The other two aren't exactly Happy Maione and Frank the Dasher, but I don't see a whole lot of room for nuance with them. Just a couple of cheap punks who took it too far.

It's a pity this case wasn't tried in Brooklyn, it would have been quite the show for O'Dwyer to go out on.

I'm sincerely going to miss Barrymore. He was well into his washed-up-clown phase by the time he turned up here, but in his time and in his day he was the real thing. I've enjoyed every movie I've ever seen him in, and for an actor who made his name on the stage, he was extraordinarily good in silent pictures. One of my favorite films is "When A Man Loves," a costume romance he did with Dolores Costello in 1927, based on the story of "Manon Lescaut." There's a scene where he's in a tavern having his supper, with his lost lover's pet cat on the table, and he's tenderly feeding her milk. A group of rogues make fun of him, and he leaps up, whips out his sword, and fights them off, all the while holding the cat out of danger. It's a breathtaking bit in an excellent film that ought to be better known than it is.

He was also a very skilled radio actor, which you would not expect from someone as flamboyant as he was, but he could modulate himself to suit the microphone when the occasion demanded. He did a series of Shakespearean plays for NBC in 1937 which are master classes on how Shakespeare should be done on the air. He usually co-starred with Miss Barrie in these presentations -- and while she isn't up to his standard, she isn't terrible either. They actually played Ariel and Caliban for real in "The Tempest," which is about as strong a case of life imitating art as you're ever going to find.

The story that Errol Flynn and a group of drinking cronies stole Barrymore's body from the morgue for one last night of revelry has been debated for years, but both his son and his granddaughter claim that it did happen. And then there's this story, which suggests that the old boy had one last unexpected curtain call. True? Who knows. But I wouldn't bet against it.

 

[LizzieMaine]

("We betteh get a shade," says Joe, glancing up at the 40-watt bulb hanging over the kitchen table." "Don't need ta," replies Sally. "What?" blurts Joe. "You wanna be a jailboid? Like ya -- um -- like some utta -- um -- a jailboid?" "No," sighs Sally. "T'at bulb is boint out." "Well, cancha swap it f'anutteh one?" "Wheah y'tink I got t'bulb inna bedroom?")

A mourning Hollywood prepared tonight for a fitting funeral for John Barrymore, the man who exasperated it, made it laugh, and, finally, made it weep. The body of the Great Profile was taken yesterday to the Pierce Mortuary, where it will lie in state all day today. Hundreds of actors, writers, newspapermen, and others who had fought with Barrymore, and had loved him too, filed past for one last look at the man who lived his whole 60 years as if he were forever 20. The actor will be buried Monday in Calvary Cemetery, in a crypt beside that of the late wife of his brother Lionel, who took charge of all funeral arrangements. Carrying Barrymore's coffin to its final rest will be his old cronies, including the fabulous W. C. Fields, eccentric artist Jack Baker, teller of tall-tales Ben Hecht, British actor Alan Mowbray, and newspaperman Gene Fowler, who wept upon learning of his old friend's passing. Undisputed matinee idol of the American stage for twenty years, one of history's greatest Shakespearean actors, and a man whose Rabelaisian humor gave strait-laced matrons the shudders, Barrymore lived a life so full it bubbled over into the courts, onto the front pages -- and into the consciousness of every fellow citizen.

(Speaking of giving strait-laced matrons the shudders...)

(Godspeed, Boody -- and may your cosmic rays never wear off.)

Dr. Horace Greeley writes in to suggest a solution to the problem of failing recruitment for the Air Raid Warden service -- why not draft WPA workers for that duty, at the same rate of pay they are now receiving. "Would this not be better than having other workers labor overtime without pay?"

("It is better to have won and lost than never to have won at all." Why isn't Tommy Holmes in the Hall of Fame?)

A two-year-old Midwood boy can read and write -- and he proved it yesterday to a reporter from the Eagle. "David," said Mrs. Fannie Dusick of 1290 Ocean Avenue to her son as he sat in his high chair, chubby fingers grasping a pencil, "write a 'D'." David chewed his lip, applied his pencil to paper, and forthwith emerged a rough but recognizable "D." After a further demonstration of letters, the reporter asked David to identify the letters appearing on a newspaper page -- and the boy did so without error, further recognizing several distinct words, including "cat," "horse," "dog," "mama," and "daddy." The boy's father, Dr. Bernard Disick, attributes his son's abilities to "a keen retentive memory and power of association," but says that otherwise, the child is perfectly normal for his age.

A 29-year-old Greenpoint man who had just concluded a 90-day jail term for impersonating a Naval officer was arrested again yesterday, after once more trying to enter the Brooklyn Navy Yard wearing the uniform of an ensign. John F. Bennett of 149 Huron Street told the judge in Manhattan Federal Court that when he was released from custody, the uniform he was wearing at the time of his original arrest was returned to him, so he figured he might as well try again. When he was turned away from the Navy Yard a second time, he went to a nearby bar, where he was again arrested.

Lt. Gen. Vinegar Joe Stilwell makes the front of TREND this week, after acknowledging that Allied troops "took a hell of a beating" from Japanese forces in Burma. He admits this was "as humiliating as hell," but declares that there will be an ultimate victory. "The Japanese," he insists, "are not supermen."

Babe Ruth is pleased with Gary Cooper's interpretation of his old teammate Lou Gehrig, especially after the Babe drilled the tall and rangy star in how to bat and throw left-handed. "He rides me hard," says Cooper, as he watched the Babe hastily retreat the movie set after completing a scene. The Babe is one of several Yankee greats appearing in Samuel Goldwyn's film biography of the Iron Horse, including Bill Dickey, Bob Meusel, and Mark Koenig. Leo Durocher, another former Ruth teammate, tried out for a role in the picture, but didn't make the grade.

(Oooh, fun! Now toss him back up!)

(C'mon, you have a chance to show Ulysses S. Grant in a bustle, and you just give him one of the little side drawings? I'm very disappointed.)

("Forty Second Street Angels?" Have we time traveled to 1929?)

(I'm sure the Governor will be glad to see all of you. Bring matches. And WAIT A MINUTE, IRWIN"S GETTING MARRIED. That's right, Marsh, shake up the strip!)

(Magistrate Solomon tries out for his new job as host of "Take It Or Leave It.")

(Mr. Hix is having trouble this week with his dog.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

No, hon, you're thinking of Leibowitz. *He's* the nice judge.

(My grandfather did this, sitting on the roof of the Full Gospel Church with a pair of binoculars, a tin helmet, and a thermos not containing coffee.)

You didn't know small-town theatre critics were also hard-boiled detectives, NOW DID YOU?

Nice job, folks, but do you have AFRA cards?

So Annie, when will you be enlisting in the commandos? And I call your attention to today's "Maw Green" -- while the joke is painful, note that Mr. Gray has, for the first time, drawn a Black character *not* in the usual fat-lipped minstrel style. It's taking time, but there is, in fact, a New World Coming.

Moon rides a fixie? What a hipster.

If it didn't work for Madeline....

To be fair, the level of competition in this league isn't really all that high.

I bet when Judy grows up she'll be a psychologist.

"Well, if you think I'm gonna star in the freak show you can forget it. How much will you pay?"

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in summation...

 

[Fading Fast]

...

(Godspeed, Boody -- and may your cosmic rays never wear off.)
...

It's nice to have that mystery answered. As you note, we can only wish Mr. Rogers the best.

...

A 29-year-old Greenpoint man who had just concluded a 90-day jail term for impersonating a Naval officer was arrested again yesterday, after once more trying to enter the Brooklyn Navy Yard wearing the uniform of an ensign. John F. Bennett of 149 Huron Street told the judge in Manhattan Federal Court that when he was released from custody, the uniform he was wearing at the time of his original arrest was returned to him, so he figured he might as well try again. When he was turned away from the Navy Yard a second time, he went to a nearby bar, where he was again arrested.
...

Let's see, we have a 28-year-old man who wants to wear a uniform and a world war raging, seems the judge should be able to solve this problem.

...

Babe Ruth is pleased with Gary Cooper's interpretation of his old teammate Lou Gehrig, especially after the Babe drilled the tall and rangy star in how to bat and throw left-handed. "He rides me hard," says Cooper, as he watched the Babe hastily retreat the movie set after completing a scene. The Babe is one of several Yankee greats appearing in Samuel Goldwyn's film biography of the Iron Horse, including Bill Dickey, Bob Meusel, and Mark Koenig. Leo Durocher, another former Ruth teammate, tried out for a role in the picture, but didn't make the grade.
...

Leo's ego couldn't have liked that.

And in the Daily News...

No, hon, you're thinking of Leibowitz. *He's* the nice judge.
...

Hirschl's (that name does not spell itself) trial is going to be interesting as you wonder if the prosecution is going to argue all four were in the room and killed Mrs. Reich together? It almost seems this lets him off the murder charge.

...


You didn't know small-town theatre critics were also hard-boiled detectives, NOW DID YOU?
...

Apparently, the police have decided to forgive and forget Mrs. Yollman's and Van Dyke's real crime of kidnapping.

...

To be fair, the level of competition in this league isn't really all that high.
...

That's why Paulette should be Shadow's inside of a week.

And in summation...

To the end, the papers made this the trail of Madeline Webb and some other guys. The News asked the right question, what the heck does the state do with Hirschl now?

 

[PrivateEye]

Imagine what they'd think of the thong bikini...

 

[Fading Fast]

Imagine what they'd think of the thong bikini...

I almost posted the anecdote of my 1996 long weekend in South Beach Florida with my girlfriend at the time. The first day goes like this: rush to airport, hassle of flying down in coach, long line for a cab to hotel, check in, change, head down to the beach, find spot, sit back, breathe out for the first time in many hours and look around, "Hmm, that's funny, it almost looks like that young woman isn't wearing a top to her bikini...how 'bout that, she isn't." I had no idea when we booked the last-minute trip that it was a topless beach, the first one I had ever been to.

Then again, there was a spot - can't think of the name this second - that we read about recently in these Day by Days that was an informal (and illegal) nudist hangout in/near Brooklyn.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Valley Stream, where drive in movies aren't the only attraction.

 

[PrivateEye]

I almost posted the anecdote of my 1996 long weekend in South Beach Florida with my girlfriend at the time. The first day goes like this: rush to airport, hassle of flying down in coach, long line for a cab to hotel, check in, change, head down to the beach, find spot, sit back, breathe out for the first time in many hours and look around, "Hmm, that's funny, it almost looks like that young woman isn't wearing a top to her bikini...how 'bout that, she isn't." I had no idea when we booked the last-minute trip that it was a topless beach, the first one I had ever been to.

Then again, there was a spot - can't think of the name this second - that we read about recently in these Day by Days that was an informal (and illegal) nudist hangout in/near Brooklyn.

I had a similar experience with my wife on our first visit to South Beach....except I knew exactly what I was doing!

 

[LizzieMaine]

(At first I read that dice story as Father and Son Surpless themselves rolling the bones. Which would make sense, I mean, O'Dwyer's away and the mice will play...)

A Manhattan coffee roaster sent out a circular today to its wholesale restaurant customers recommending that they "water the coffee" to reduce consumption in the face of a War Production Board order cutting coffee deliveries by 25 percent. The WPB itself criticized the circular distributed by Ph. Weschler & Son, and it was roundly denounced by Consumers' Union, prominent consumers' organization. Two major restaurant chains, Bickford's and Childs, announced that they would not water their coffee, despite the suggestion in the circular that "the public will soon become accustomed to drinking coffee that is not up to par." Consumers Union, in a statement released today, called the Weschler company's recommendation "a dire violation of both the spirit and the intention of the WPB order," and warned that the sale of a diminished product without a reduction in price might make the situation a matter for adjudication by the Office of Price Administration.

Fourteen high-ranking Nazi officers were arrested by the Gestapo today in connection with the attempted assassination of Reinhard "The Hangman" Heydrich, second in command of the German secret police, who was shot by a gunman in Prague last week. The arrests were reported by the European Revolution Radio, a clandestine broadcasting station believed to be operating from Germany under the control of a band of Prussian officers opposed to the Hitler regime. The broadcast asserted that the attack on Heydrich was most likely orchestrated by supporters of Kurt Daluegue, who succeeded "The Hangman" as "protector of Bohemia and Moravia," and that the attack was retaliation for an attack on Daluegue by Heydrich's henchmen. The arrested officers, it was stated in the broadcast, had served on the staffs of Gen. Nikolaus von Faulkenhurst and Gen. Ernst von Stuelpnagle.

Heydrich, meanwhile, remains in critical condition from the assassin's bullets, as a Gestapo reign of terror continues to blaze across Czechoslovakia. The Nazi-controlled Radio Prague reported that 20 more Czechs were executed yesterday, raising to 82 the number of hostages killed in reprisal for the assassination attempt. German authorities said the Czechs were killed for "sheltering foreign parachutists" who are being blamed for the attack on Heydrich.

Only 72 people nationwide were killed in Memorial Day traffic accidents, with the decline in holiday driving fatalities marked to gasoline rationing in the East and the nationwide curtailment of tires. Despite threatening weather over the metropolitan area yesterday, local beaches and resorts saw large crowds. Over 600,000 people crowded Coney Island yesterday, with the Rockaways reporting more than 300,000.

Assistant Attorney General Thurman Arnold asserted today that the Standard Oil Company of New Jersey attempted to mislead a Senate committee investigating the oil firms ties to the I. G. Farben chemical trust in Nazi Germany, a relationship which has "caused difficulties" in the development of a superior aviation gasoline for use by American warplanes. While stating that he does not believe that Standard of New Jersey acted out of "unpatriotic motives," he stated that he "does not believe that Standard has fulfilled its obligation to this committee to tell the truth about its cartel arrangement. This is not the time to cover up or mislead."

(A petty thief and narcotic addict? Waiting for the former nightclub dancer/model/World's Fair nudist to show up.)

(Wait, you mean all sheiks don't look like Valentino? Or Tyrone Power, depending on how old you are?)

Reader Verna W. Sawtelle writes in to praise the naming of the new Gowanus Parkway. "It is good to see the proud and honored name of Gowanus on our beautiful new parkway," she gushes. "It deserves such such recognition to redeem it from the obscurity and ignominy of past years. It was too long synonymous with traffic delay."

(Well, that and the smell.)

(Unclear On the Concept.)

The public will be barred from Hollywood funeral services for John Barrymore, with the list of mourners admitted to the services confined only to friends and relatives. Among those on the invitation list are Clark Gable, Herbert Marshall, John Carradine, George Cukor, Errol Flynn, Katharine Hepburn, Greta Garbo, Louis B. Mayer, David O. Selznick, Spencer Tracy, and Rudy Vallee. A requiem mass for the late actor will be held at 11 am tomorrow at the Calvary Cemetery chapel. Attorney Gordon Levoy, representing the Barrymore family, stated that he has been appointed an executor of the late actor's estate, along with brother Lionel and newspaperman and close friend Gene Fowler. It was acknowledged that Barrymore at the time of his death owned few assets other than his house.

("Ja read t'is?" inquires Joe, flourishing a copy of the May 23rd Saturday Evening Post he found on the train. "Iss gotta story innit bout t'is baseball manageh who's a real louse wit' a big loud mout', an' a crook b'sides! T'ey cawl 'is name 'Gaban,' buttey say it's spos'ta be Leo! I ask ya!" "Well," sighs Sally, "he traded Petey.")

(Abbott and Costello at the Met. Marcus Loew is rolling in his grave.)

(There isn't much point to a convertible if you don't roll the windows down.)

(Who needs a Harvard MBA when you've got George Bungle?)

(Stop posing, Leona, this story isn't about you.)

("That's a bad thing to do -- or do you think so?" Dan's lines work better if you read them with a Lithuanian accent.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

And Madeline bellows I DIDN'T DO IT!

And you know H&H won't water the coffee. That'd mean CORPORAL punishment!

"I hate boats," says Sandy. "I really hate boats."

"But I shaved off my beard!"

$35 a week, kid. Think it over.

Mama will love this. Yes she will.

"Nah," thinks Lana. "Must be that strange little bald boy."

Give 'em a raise, and all they do is complain.

This could go in a lot of directions.

And watch that "rabble" stuff.

 

[LizzieMaine]

And a final thought...

Mr. Mantle is a bit harsh here -- I wouldn't say the past twenty years were a waste. The past three or so, maybe, but before the liquor took its final toll, Mr. Barrymore made several fine pictures in the 1920s and early 1930s that shouldn't be forgotten.

 

[Fading Fast]

(At first I read that dice story as Father and Son Surpless themselves rolling the bones. Which would make sense, I mean, O'Dwyer's away and the mice will play...)
...

The headline on that story is misleading as heck. I doubt if today, where we obsess over ever conflict of interest we regular people have (while top-level politicians can do whatever they want), a policeman could even appear in a court where his father is the judge?

...
(A petty thief and narcotic addict? Waiting for the former nightclub dancer/model/World's Fair nudist to show up.)
...

Unless they have a very rich family, most narcotic addicts become petty thieves. The overlapping area of those two circles is pretty big.

I believe our most famous nightclub dancer/model/World's Fair nudist was tucked away behind bars when this happened, so this time, she has an air-tight alibi.

...

Reader Verna W. Sawtelle writes in to praise the naming of the new Gowanus Parkway. "It is good to see the proud and honored name of Gowanus on our beautiful new parkway," she gushes. "It deserves such such recognition to redeem it from the obscurity and ignominy of past years. It was too long synonymous with traffic delay."
...

Today, "the Tappan Zee," as in the Tappan Zee Bridge, as in "stay off the Tappan Zee," is synonymous with traffic delays.

...

(Unclear On the Concept.)
...

I thought the caption for the guy with his hands spread was going to be, "Buh, buh, buh I didn't know that watering down the coffee counted as a price increase."

...

Mama will love this. Yes she will.
...

"Old Hortense will be pointing her nose so high, she'll be wearing her double chins on the back of her neck." Andy, do you really want to get into physical-appearance jokes; although, that was a pretty good one.

...


"Nah," thinks Lana. "Must be that strange little bald boy."
...

In the post-1960s world of dating, where most couples have slept together even if they've only gone out a few times (or less), the "he's dating my old girlfriend / she's with my old boyfriend" has more visceral feel to it.

...

This could go in a lot of directions.
...

I prefer Classic Hollywood's portrayal of women's prisons as it aligns more with my thinking on the subject.

..

And watch that "rabble" stuff.

And the Dragon Lady thinks, "This is why I put up with pretty-boy's ego."

 

[LizzieMaine]

("Mayors come and go," snorts Butch. "You think so, do ya?")

Red Army troops have driven the Germans back and seized "advantageous positions" in sharp fighting on the northern fronts between Moscow and Leningrad, the Russian high command said today in a communique which reported a lull on the southern Kharkov front. In one sector south of Leningrad, the Soviets were said to have routed the enemy from strategic positions, and to have thrown back German attacks preceded by heavy artillery fire.

A very large convoy of United Nations merchant ships fought its way to a North Russian port with supplies for the Red Army after a five day battle against German submarines and airplanes, it was reported today by the Admiralty. The number of ships lost while enroute to the Russian port, presumed to be Murmansk, was not disclosed, but it was said that the German claim that 18 ships were sunk was "an exaggeration of more than 175 percent." That calculation suggests about half a dozen Allied ships were lost.

Twenty-nine more hostages and patriots face death today on the European Continent before Nazi firing squads, with the German Transocean News Agency reporting the sentencing of another thirteen men and women to death for "anti-Nazi activities" in Mannheim, Germany. It is believed that the latest wave of executions is not directly related to the attack last week on Reinhard "The Hangman" Heydrich, which has triggered a wave of Gestapo reprisals claiming the lives of 167 martyrs. It was also announced in Paris by General Ernst von Steulpnagle that ten hostages will be shot in reprisal for partisan attacks on a Nazi soldier on May 27th. In Solia, five Communists were sentenced to be shot for an attack on a concentration camp.

In Vichy, two small boys accused of pulling down a statue of Britain's King Edward VII were released without punishment.

The president of the Standard Oil Company of New Jersey asserted today that his firm's cartel arrangement with the German chemical trust I. G. Farben has actually benefitted the United States war effort. In a letter today to Senator Harry S. Truman (D-Missouri), chairman of the Senate Committee to Investigate the U. S. Defense Program, Standard president W. S. Farish stressed that it was his firm's arrangement with I. G. Farben that led to the development in 1935 of 100-octane aviation gasoline, which puts Allied planes "far ahead of Axis planes."

("Hmph!" hmphs Sally. "My ma lives t'ree blocks f'm t'is characteh, an' she don' heah no music a'tall!" "She drowns it out," mutters Joe. "What?" "Nut'n.")

The system of reduced home deliveries for all goods ordered by the Office of Defense Transportation moves into its second day today with reports of general compliance. Affected by the order are newspapers, which have reduced from seven to four editions per day, and have, in some cases replaced delivery trucks with horse-drawn wagons;milk companies, which have moved to an every-other-day delivery policy; bakeries, which have eliminated early deliveries; and laundries and department stores, which have eliminated all small deliveries.

(Got a lot to wrap up before he goes in the Army. Better hustle!)

(Yes the columnists and the critics are going to miss Barrymore, but cheer up -- you've still got Errol Flynn.)

The Eagle Editorialist notes that the rejection of a quarter of a million healthy men from the Armed Forces on the grounds of illiteracy is a cause for national humiliation. "We cannot in all honesty boast about our high standard of living, and of the equality of American opportunity as long as so many young men of our country cannot read or write."

("Yeah, an' a punch press never pinches ya behind.")

(I never figured Camilli for the literary type. It seems, when viewed under high magnification, that he is reading some sort of publication about the Battle for Russia, but that could be anything from a comic book to "Soviet Russia Today." Either way, though, it won't make ya hit the curve ball. Oh, and I think Mrs. Gehrig will, in fact, like the movie.)

Women tend to do well on "Information Please," and Madeline Carroll expects to hold up the high standard set by the likes of Gracie Allen, Lillian Gish, and Cornelia Otis Skinner in recent weeks when she joins John Kieran, Franklin P. Adams, and Oscar Levant in fielding Clifton Fadiman's questions over WEAF this Friday night.

(Can't be much of a wind if it hasn't blown those hats off.)

("Yes sir, these tires have not one atom of rubber! They're 100 percent aluminum!")

(If you're going to steal jokes from Joe Miller, there are better ones than that. Did you hear the one about what the parliamentarian said to the curate?)

("Um, what was that safe word again?")