The Dumbest Comment I Ever Heard

[avedwards]

I was told by a friend's father that he overheard a conversation at a car boot sale where new soldiers were being given second hand equipment.

One solder said to the other that he had no idea what his sizes were, so the other one (looking him up and down) said he should just add one on to his sizes. The rest went something like this I'm told:

"Collar size?"

"Fifteen"
"Sixteen"

"Shoe size?"

"Nine"
"Ten"

"Hat size?"

"Six and seven eighths"
"Seven, eight, nine"

Hat wise I think that this could arguably be one of the dumbest comments.

 

[dhermann1]

This thread just always continues to prove how utterly, totally and completely terrified people are of being different, and how threated they feel seeing someone who isn't afraid.

 

[metropd]

This thread just always continues to prove how utterly, totally and completely terrified people are of being different, and how threated they feel seeing someone who isn't afraid.

10000000000000+ :eusa_clap

 

[Tooch]

I get the occasional "Indy" and "Dick Tracy" comments, but the dumbest I've heard was a few weeks ago when I was walking across a strip mall parking lot and some time-warp-plagued hippie leaned out of a passing mini-van to sing "Staying Alive" at the top of his voice.

In his mind, apparently, a classically styled sport coat purchased in the late '80s, chinos, Bass oxfords and a fifty-plus-year-old Champ copy of the Stratoliner constituted a '70s flashback.

I suppose I could have broken out in a rendition of "Aquarius" if the minivan hadn't putted away at its jammed-in-second-gear top speed, but it probably would have gone right over the knit cap on his head.

On the other hand, I was crossing the campus of the local community college yesterday, sporting my Royalist Supreme, and a sixty-ish lady smiled and told me I looked "very dapper."

"Somebody has to uphold standards," I replied.

"You're very right," she said.

So it's not all dummies out there.

 

[Lefty]

Not the dumbest, but an odd one from an old lady at a thrift store:

her: Where's your guitar?

me: (figuring this was going the cowboy route, in a nice tone) Why would I have a guitar?

her: My son in law plays guitar on (some radio station, I think), and he dresses like you, so you should have a guitar.

me: Oh, ha ha. [huh] :fing28:

 

[Carlisle Blues]

Why would someone call you a girl?[huh]

I think it is the way I dress...I dunno...

 

[Slim Portly]

Recently I was sporting a brown derby, and a stranger made the comment, "Nice bowling hat."

I thanked him, and he observed, "You don't see too many bowling hats any more."

I agreed, and then he asked me if I sang. Still recovering from the close-but-no-cigar previous comments, I was momentarily thrown by this apparent non sequitur. "No," I replied. "Why do you ask?"

"Because they wear bowling hats in barbershop quartets."

 

[ScottF]

The other day I stopped in a bar to have a beer and watch football. A guy walked by and said, "Oh, Indiana Jones...you bring a bullwhip?"

I have ignored most of the Indy comments, but this time I couldn't. So I asked him, "Have you ever seen an Indiana Jones movie?" "Uh, yeah..." "Did you ever see him wearing a green fedora? Wearing a black coat? wearing bluejeans or running shoes?"

Then I realized it was Halloween, so I felt just a touch bad about it. As pennance, I went out that night dressed as closely as I could to Indiana Jones, and I must say I pulled it off well. Not ONE comment! :eusa_doh: :eusa_doh:

 

[celtic]

not the dumbest ever, but...

Wearing a shirt/tie, trousers, cordovan wingtips, a brown flat cap and a tan trenchcoat.

A coworker I only see rarely said

"Wow look at you...you look just like Inspector Clouseau! You even have wingtips on. You're really dressed to the nines"

I was a bit puzzled by the Clouseau comment, so i think I mumbled something about life being too short (so why not get all dressed up? is was I meant to convey) and telling her to have a a\good day...

 

[jwalls]

Recently I was sporting a brown derby, and a stranger made the comment, "Nice bowling hat."

I thanked him, and he observed, "You don't see too many bowling hats any more."

I agreed, and then he asked me if I sang. Still recovering from the close-but-no-cigar previous comments, I was momentarily thrown by this apparent non sequitur. "No," I replied. "Why do you ask?"

"Because they wear bowling hats in barbershop quartets."

I like 'bowling hats' my self. http://www.xoopit.com/s/20um7cjq58ene044sfo8

 

[jamespowers]

Recently I was sporting a brown derby, and a stranger made the comment, "Nice bowling hat."

I thanked him, and he observed, "You don't see too many bowling hats any more."

I agreed, and then he asked me if I sang. Still recovering from the close-but-no-cigar previous comments, I was momentarily thrown by this apparent non sequitur. "No," I replied. "Why do you ask?"

"Because they wear bowling hats in barbershop quartets."

Uh, that's boating hats not bowling hats.

 

[jamespowers]

I get the occasional "Indy" and "Dick Tracy" comments, but the dumbest I've heard was a few weeks ago when I was walking across a strip mall parking lot and some time-warp-plagued hippie leaned out of a passing mini-van to sing "Staying Alive" at the top of his voice.

In his mind, apparently, a classically styled sport coat purchased in the late '80s, chinos, Bass oxfords and a fifty-plus-year-old Champ copy of the Stratoliner constituted a '70s flashback.

I suppose I could have broken out in a rendition of "Aquarius" if the minivan hadn't putted away at its jammed-in-second-gear top speed, but it probably would have gone right over the knit cap on his head.

On the other hand, I was crossing the campus of the local community college yesterday, sporting my Royalist Supreme, and a sixty-ish lady smiled and told me I looked "very dapper."

"Somebody has to uphold standards," I replied.

"You're very right," she said.

So it's not all dummies out there.

I think that hippie would have gotten this song from me:
Oakie From Muskogee

We don't smoke marijuana in Muskogee;
We don't take our trips on LSD;
We don't burn our draft cards down on Main Street;
We like livin' right, and bein' free.

We don't make a party out of lovin';
We like holdin' hands and pitchin' woo;
We don't let our hair grow long and shaggy,
Like the hippies out in San Francisco do.

I'm proud to be an Oakie from Muskogee,
A place where even squares can have a ball.
We still wave Old Glory down at the courthouse,
And white lightin's still the biggest thril of all.

Leather boots are still in style for mainly footwear;
Beads and roman sandals won't be seen.
Football's still the roughest thing on campus,
And the kids here still respect the college dean.

And I'm proud to be an Oakie from Muskogee,
A place where even squares can have a ball.
We still wave Old Glory down at the courthouse,
And white lightin's still the biggest thril of all.

We still wave Old Glory down at the courthouse,
In Muskogee, Oklahoma, USA.

 

[jamespowers]

This thread just always continues to prove how utterly, totally and completely terrified people are of being different, and how threated they feel seeing someone who isn't afraid.

lol lol lol lol :eusa_clap :eusa_clap :eusa_clap

 

[kaosharper1]

I've had a lot of "Where's your violin case?" comments lately, but then I tend to wear DB suits (modern) when I need business dress which has been more frequent as well.

 

[McFarlaneNYC]

I got a weird one the other day from a guy at school:
"Why are you dressed like Pee Wee?"
I was wearing Dungaree Jeans cuffed, Penguin Plaid shirt, 40's work boots, and a leather jacket.
i don't know call me silly by I don't think thats what Pee Wee wore.
on the other side of the spectrum.
the same day my Dads client he was working with saw me and said:
"I have pictures of my grandfather looking just as you do now."
Charlie

 

[CliffG]

Quite a few years back I was getting fuel in my pickup, I was wearing blue jeans a western shirt of some sort and a black cowboy hat. My pickup had big microwave dish in the back, the dish was 6 feet in diameter, it resembled a big satellite dish. This gentleman asked me who I was, I told him my name, then he asked what I was doing, I politely replied that I was putting fuel in my pickup, he smiled and asked who I worked for, I replied with a very serious face that I worked for homeland security, he looked shocked and then said so whats with the cowboy hat than. I looked at him and asked him his name and who he worked for, he hurried off to get his wife and loaded hp in his car and left. I was having a hard time not laughing, as I sure do not work for home land security, and was just coming back from the horse auction where I had sold a nice Thoroughbred three year old horse that I had raised and trained, and the big dish in the back of my pickup was aluminum and was going to be taken to be recycled the next day.

 

[CliffG]

This thread just always continues to prove how utterly, totally and completely terrified people are of being different, and how threaded they feel seeing someone who isn't afraid.

Quoted for Truth!
Absolutely correct dherman1!, you have nailed it right on the head, if anyone is familiar with the movie easy rider when they are talking about freedom and a free individual this comment made me think of that old movie and that clip.
I did find that specific clip on youtube
I searched for easy rider on freedom, I watched it and was really surprised on just how much your comment was on the line with this scene in a older movie.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zHd6m_cirrU&feature=related

 

[MisterCairo]

Occasionally I will have someone say I look like a gangster. I politely say "Hopefully not because I'm just a gentleman. They will apologize and say, "I meant to say you look great!"
I like to handle it this way since everybody wins.

If the individual is more street and saying I look gangsta I say, "I'm a gentleman but sometimes I have to handle my business."

The usual dumb comments I get with are Elliot Ness, Bogart, Sinatra, Fred Astaire, Capone, Cary Grant, Myer Lanskey, Tyrone Power, or William Powell, pretty much anyone they know from that era that reminds them of that era.

I get a young Sinatra by FAR the Most.

Sound like compliments to me!

 

[carldelo]

Uh, that's boating hats not bowling hats.

I figured the onlooker confused Bowler with Bowling - so he gets partial credit for being only half-clueless, no?

 

[AtomicEraTom]

And that's why I pledge allegance to the Hagg.

I think that hippie would have gotten this song from me:
Oakie From Muskogee

We don't smoke marijuana in Muskogee;
We don't take our trips on LSD;
We don't burn our draft cards down on Main Street;
We like livin' right, and bein' free.

We don't make a party out of lovin';
We like holdin' hands and pitchin' woo;
We don't let our hair grow long and shaggy,
Like the hippies out in San Francisco do.

I'm proud to be an Oakie from Muskogee,
A place where even squares can have a ball.
We still wave Old Glory down at the courthouse,
And white lightin's still the biggest thril of all.

Leather boots are still in style for mainly footwear;
Beads and roman sandals won't be seen.
Football's still the roughest thing on campus,
And the kids here still respect the college dean.

And I'm proud to be an Oakie from Muskogee,
A place where even squares can have a ball.
We still wave Old Glory down at the courthouse,
And white lightin's still the biggest thril of all.

We still wave Old Glory down at the courthouse,
In Muskogee, Oklahoma, USA.