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The Dumbest Comment I Ever Heard

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NDW76

New in Town
Messages
33
Location
Bangkok, Thailand
jamespowers said:
lol lol lol Did he have about three teeth left to smile back at you? :p
What were the other two words he knew? Money and Free? :p

Unfortunately, of the three words every Thai knows one is 'off' and the other starts with 'f'
 

Fatman

New in Town
Messages
9
Location
Newcastle, N.S.W.
Looks like this is my first post. Hi

Once at a party one girl referred to me as 'Mr. Top Hat Man' all night.

The second one is, I was at the pub and a bloke also made a comment about top hats, though I didn't exactly hear what he said.

In the first story I was wearing a suit and my Akubra Hayman. In the second I was wearing T shirt, jeans and a flat cap.
 
LordBest said:
Had the following little exchange with some gentlemen (in the broadest sense of the word) in their 40s outside my favourite cheese and wine merchant. Not the first time I've used this response but I think the first time I've posted it here. I guess all they saw was the tweed overcoat, cap and brogues:

Man: "Hey, its not the 1940 anymore mate" (his two friends laugh)
LB: "What?"
Man: "You shouldn't be wearing that shit, its not the 1940s" (more laughter)
LB: "I say, isn't it?"
Man: "Err, no"
LB: "What year is it then?"
Man: "Twentyten"
LB: "Great Scott, everyone I ever loved is dead!"
Men: Awkward silence.
LB: "Oh well, can't be helped. Good day, gentleman" (Doffs cap and continues into the store.

It was 7c, 45f out at the time, and the men were wearing shorts and complaining about the cold, to give you some idea of the type.

You had them step into the Twilgiht Zone there. lol lol
Then again, they might have been there in the first place if they were wearing shorts when it is 45 degrees out. :rolleyes: :eusa_doh:
 

Dr Doran

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,854
Location
Los Angeles
LordBest said:
Had the following little exchange with some gentlemen (in the broadest sense of the word) in their 40s outside my favourite cheese and wine merchant. Not the first time I've used this response but I think the first time I've posted it here. I guess all they saw was the tweed overcoat, cap and brogues:

Man: "Hey, its not the 1940 anymore mate" (his two friends laugh)
LB: "What?"
Man: "You shouldn't be wearing that shit, its not the 1940s" (more laughter)
LB: "I say, isn't it?"
Man: "Err, no"
LB: "What year is it then?"
Man: "Twentyten"
LB: "Great Scott, everyone I ever loved is dead!"
Men: Awkward silence.
LB: "Oh well, can't be helped. Good day, gentleman" (Doffs cap and continues into the store.

It was 7c, 45f out at the time, and the men were wearing shorts and complaining about the cold, to give you some idea of the type.

This is godlike. You, sir, are brilliant. Bravo.
 

guitarman

New in Town
Messages
11
Location
Franklin, Pa.
Re;

Hi everyone. This is my first post, and I love this site !! A few years ago, I was in a local chain store, anda guy I worked with previously came past me, as I was standing there in my Aussie stockman hat and full-length drover, and said,"Oh hi-I didnt recognize you in your cowboy outfit." WTF !!! Cowboy outfit ??? Excuse me, but these happen to be genuine Australian-made articles, not some suburban plowboy "outfit". Other comments; Indiana Jones, mountain man, and my dad used to ask me(but it wasnt stupid, it was kinda funny)"Where did you park your U-boat?" He was an Army veteran and was stationed in Germany,and he thought I looked like a German soldier when I wore my black Aussie drover (full length ) And my niece always says, "Ewww.....your coat smells!!(from the oilskin re-proofing wax) Glad to meet all of you here !!
 

St.Ignatz

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,444
Location
On the banks of the Karakung.
Get used to it and welcome to the lounge. You wear your hat for you of course but so many wear things for fashion. We have a wall of security cameras displayed were I work and over the last few few years I've seen a marked increase in fedoras etc. As for myself I've seen a real shift in perception from "dudes wearin' a hat" to "dudes wearin' a quality hat". You set the bar, others increase their confidence and horizons enough to test the waters.
Tom D.

Ramble courtesy of Myers rum.
 

FedoraGent

One Too Many
Messages
1,223
Location
San Francisco Bay Area
I just had to post on this one...

LordBest said:
Had the following little exchange with some gentlemen (in the broadest sense of the word) in their 40s outside my favourite cheese and wine merchant. Not the first time I've used this response but I think the first time I've posted it here. I guess all they saw was the tweed overcoat, cap and brogues:

Man: "Hey, its not the 1940 anymore mate" (his two friends laugh)
LB: "What?"
Man: "You shouldn't be wearing that shit, its not the 1940s" (more laughter)
LB: "I say, isn't it?"
Man: "Err, no"
LB: "What year is it then?"
Man: "Twentyten"
LB: "Great Scott, everyone I ever loved is dead!"
Men: Awkward silence.
LB: "Oh well, can't be helped. Good day, gentleman" (Doffs cap and continues into the store.

It was 7c, 45f out at the time, and the men were wearing shorts and complaining about the cold, to give you some idea of the type.

This one was so funny that Doran called me on the phone and said that I should look at this with Magneto. Thank you for this, it made my day.

FG.
 
Try this for response:

"When I want your opinion, I'll...
(pick one)
...give it to you."
...slap it out of you."
...slap myself for devolving to the point of sufficient self-delusion to consider the possibility of a troglodyte like you actually forming a thought-out opinion."

[and so on--there are infinite possibilities]

Or my personal favorite:
"Your opinion is irrelevant."
[wait, let them respond]
"YOU are irrelevant." [and make best possible speed away from them]


Frequently, dismissing the fools as beneath the notice and attention they so crave is one of the most scathing criticisms they can receive. So, just dismiss them from sight and thought and be on your way...

(Hey, at least I'm not advocating the three-word response of one of my heroes, ore breaking out the Drill Sarge-ittude of another!lol)

Or... "Excuse me, I'm supposed to consider the fashion advice of a deserter from the Slobovian Army precisely WHY, again?"
 

Dave E

One of the Regulars
Messages
273
Location
Buckingham, UK
LordBest said:
Had the following little exchange with some gentlemen (in the broadest sense of the word) in their 40s outside my favourite cheese and wine merchant. Not the first time I've used this response but I think the first time I've posted it here. I guess all they saw was the tweed overcoat, cap and brogues:

Man: "Hey, its not the 1940 anymore mate" (his two friends laugh)
LB: "What?"
Man: "You shouldn't be wearing that shit, its not the 1940s" (more laughter)
LB: "I say, isn't it?"
Man: "Err, no"
LB: "What year is it then?"
Man: "Twentyten"
LB: "Great Scott, everyone I ever loved is dead!"
Men: Awkward silence.
LB: "Oh well, can't be helped. Good day, gentleman" (Doffs cap and continues into the store.

It was 7c, 45f out at the time, and the men were wearing shorts and complaining about the cold, to give you some idea of the type.

That is simply superb :) :eusa_clap
 

The Good

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,361
Location
California, USA
LordBest said:
Had the following little exchange with some gentlemen (in the broadest sense of the word) in their 40s outside my favourite cheese and wine merchant. Not the first time I've used this response but I think the first time I've posted it here. I guess all they saw was the tweed overcoat, cap and brogues:

Man: "Hey, its not the 1940 anymore mate" (his two friends laugh)
LB: "What?"
Man: "You shouldn't be wearing that shit, its not the 1940s" (more laughter)
LB: "I say, isn't it?"
Man: "Err, no"
LB: "What year is it then?"
Man: "Twentyten"
LB: "Great Scott, everyone I ever loved is dead!"
Men: Awkward silence.
LB: "Oh well, can't be helped. Good day, gentleman" (Doffs cap and continues into the store.

It was 7c, 45f out at the time, and the men were wearing shorts and complaining about the cold, to give you some idea of the type.


Wow, that was extremely rude. Sadly, ignorant fools like this actually exist. I have to admit, this probably takes the cake for the most rude, dumbest comment I've read on this thread, and I've read perhaps seventy pages already. I think you dealt with it just fine though!
 

Dr Doran

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,854
Location
Los Angeles
LordBest said:
Thank you very much, I'm very glad you liked it.

The geniousness of your response is actually that you were NOT rude. You were a gentleman. You said nothing that could possibly incur fisticuffs. Eventually when the morons sober up, one of them may laugh at himself and appreciate the humor of what you said.

I do enjoy aggro. I also truly enjoy knocking someone down when he deserves it. The look of shock, fear, and pain on the face which had previously showed contempt etc. But the best response is a gentlemanly, clever, subtle one. Partly because you cannot have legal charges pressed upon you. Mostly because it's just clever and funny and does NOT add insults to the world.
 
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