Want to buy or sell something? Check the classifieds
  • The Fedora Lounge is supported in part by commission earning affiliate links sitewide. Please support us by using them. You may learn more here.

Rudeness

Shearer

Practically Family
Messages
779
Location
Squaresville
"Pavlovian runners" totally made my Monday morning.

Feraud may be on to something with his rebellion theory. I have an acquaintance with a young daughter. The last time I saw her and her kid, I bent down to say hello to this little girl (I call her Monster) and put my hand on her shoulder. She responded with an ear-shattering, "Don't touch me!" I'd like to think she may rebel against the rotten way her parents raise her and turn out well one day, but I don't see the odds in her favour ;)

Mike K. Call it laziness on my part, but I'm not one to point out where others are lacking manners. I'm easy going, so I usually just groan inwardly and go along my merry way. I also think calling them out on it will just put them in a fouler mood anyway and start something with me.
 

Mr. 'H'

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,110
Location
Dublin, Ireland, Ireland
Shearer said:
The last time I saw her and her kid, I bent down to say hello to this little girl (I call her Monster) and put my hand on her shoulder. She responded with an ear-shattering, "Don't touch me!"

OMG :eek:

If I were the parent I would be mortified! Bet the mother didn't seem too bothered though....
 

RedPop4

One Too Many
Messages
1,353
Location
Metropolitan New Orleans
That's what they teach children now, in order to help prevent kidnappings and molestation. Children are taught that anyone they do not know is a stranger, which is certain. And that they are not to talk to or take anything from a stranger. If a stranger touches them they are to respond in this manner.

I guess what they have NOT thought through is that once the child screams, everyone around them will automatically look to see what the trouble is. The next person to approach will, in all likelihood, be a stranger as well.....
 

Elaina

One Too Many
Well, there is a way of handling that with some decorum, and should be the parent's responibility to teach that to the children.

I hate being touched by people I do know, much less people I don't. There's an art to getting people to move their hands, or not touching you at all, and sounds like the "Monster" needs to be learning that art, or just a simple "Please don't touch me."
 

Etienne

A-List Customer
Messages
473
Location
Northern California
Dan G said:
I think its more than just a trend, it seems to be the attitude of society today. People are living and moving too fast, always concerned with only the task at hand. How long can you sit at a stoplight before someone honks, maybe a full second?

You're more tolerant than I am, this warrants that sailor's mouth and a loss of employment! Teach them to insult my intelligence! Oh wait... Thats why I joined the Navy, smooth out some rough edges...;)
Wishing you calm seas and sunshine tomorow!

Dan G., you sound like a gem!! I am enjoying your fresh, fun, down to earth posts! Welcome to the FL, by the way! And your sense of restraint is quite refreshing!
 

RedPop4

One Too Many
Messages
1,353
Location
Metropolitan New Orleans
Elaina, they tell them on TV, even in the Cub Scout handbooks, to move away and scream "don't touch me." Kid's TV is also running public service ads. as well as show content instructing the little ones to do just that.

Heck I had a player on my soccer team last season, his dad even helped me on gamedays, who wouldn't shake my hand or "give me a high five." He was good, he deserved congratulations. Just last week, he walked up to me to talk, and talked to me, but wouldn't come closer than five feet.
 

Flying Scotsman

One of the Regulars
Messages
229
Location
Pasadena, CA
I have no trouble calling people on rude behavior (or children that are acting inappropriately).

E.g., at a local restaurant that gets crowded, they have a lower-level parking lot down the street and a shuttle bus. While waiting for the valet, an older couple came up and asked a guy who was also waiting for the valet, "Is this the shuttle bus stop?" He got very sarcastic with them..."No, it's the VALET STAND. We're waiting for the VALET", while pointing at the valet stand.

I told him, quite forcefully, "For your information, this IS the shuttle bus stop. So you snapped at them, and you were WRONG, weren't you?!"

Jerks like that cheese me off... :)
 

Christine

New in Town
Messages
20
Location
Florida
I've noticed this as well. :eek: My mom raised me to be polite and to respect others but it seems as though others have missed that lesson in childhood. :rolleyes: Surprisingly, more older people are rude than some of the kids my age. One thing I do hate is when people act like you're some creepy perv if you give them a friendly smile. lol
 

TheKitschGoth

A-List Customer
Messages
407
Location
Brighton, UK
Christine said:
Surprisingly, more older people are rude than some of the kids my age.

I've noticed that. Especially when driving, it's the chav boys in their boy racer cars who stop to let me out, or wave to say thanks if I let them out. It's very rare that the older drivers show any courtesy at all.

Rudest thing I have ever heard though was when I was with a friend on the way to a gym, we'd never been there before and the directions we'd used took us the wrong way. So we stopped at a garage to ask for directions, my friend went in to ask for directions. Now my friend isn't the slimmest of girls, and when she asked where the gym was, the (far from toned) garage assistant laughed and said "YOU want to go to the gym?!" :rage:
 

Brian Sheridan

One Too Many
Messages
1,456
Location
Erie, PA
farnham54 said:
Every cloud has a silver lining.

Unfortunatley, if you expect bad things, it's what you'll get. I agree, people this time of year, and in this day and age, are less the courteous; I believe it has always been thus.

However, in between the Cigar blowing, the bookstore snorting, and the retail bickering, how many good, polite, and just plain decent things happened to you? This is a question I challenge everyone to ask, and it certainly CAN be a challenge sometimes!

Just today my family and I were in a Fender bender. Bad news; but it was a sunny day, the attending officer was a real gent, and the kid who rear-ended us was extremely pleasant to deal with and very apologetic. Yes, bad situation, but it sure was nice to have such good interactions.

I reccomend, if you find yourself really down, to write down every nice thing that happens, either as it happens (reccomended) or at the end of the day. You get a nice view of the world from the sunny side of the street :)

Cheers
Craig

I'm glad to see it hasnt spread to Canada yet. We are always impressed by the politeness and hospitality of our neighbors to the North. The only exception is when it comes to hockey - but we'll cut ya slack for that.
Go Erie Panthers!
 

Elaina

One Too Many
RedPop4 said:
Elaina, they tell them on TV, even in the Cub Scout handbooks, to move away and scream "don't touch me." Kid's TV is also running public service ads. as well as show content instructing the little ones to do just that.

I don't see it in my handbook, or my son's scout book. I do see the section where they're supposed to say No! loudly and tell an adult. But I may be looking in the wrong place.

I think that the whole screaming is going overbeard, to be honest. Yes, by all means if it's an adult who's touching you in a way as to make you uncomfortable or where a bathing suit should go. By all means, empower a kid to not be handled by someone they DO know that makes them uncomfortable. (I have an Uncle at 32 I still won't get within 3 feet of.) But just because a coach or family friend touches you?

For the record, when I teach kid safety, I teach them to yell "Fire!" People will look sooner then anything else.
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
Messages
33,728
Location
Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
It's a good idea, if you're going to teach a kid this kind of safety technique, to be really clear that it's only to be used in an actual emergency. My nephew once got piqued because my sister wouldn't buy him some bit of shiny junk or other at Wal-Mart and he began screaming HELP HELP YOURE NOT MY MOTHER HELP HELP DONT TOUCH ME HELP HELP. The result was extremely unpleasant for all involved.
 

Shearer

Practically Family
Messages
779
Location
Squaresville
Elaina said:
Well, there is a way of handling that with some decorum, and should be the parent's responibility to teach that to the children.

I hate being touched by people I do know, much less people I don't. There's an art to getting people to move their hands, or not touching you at all, and sounds like the "Monster" needs to be learning that art, or just a simple "Please don't touch me."

I completely agree. Unfortunately, her mother isn't doing a thing to teach this child manners in any way, shape or form. I understand about not wanting to be touched, especially if it's by a stranger but I'm certainly no stranger to this girl. The "don't touch me" story was just one of many... Her mother was once complimenting my nephew, telling him how cute he was when she started screaming, "I'm pretty, I'm pretty, I'm pretty!" Her mother can't even take her over to visit people's houses because she throws a tantrum yells, "Mommy, I want to leave NOW!"

Like Mr. H said, if this was my kid I would be appalled, but she just lets it slide. [huh]
 

Flying Scotsman

One of the Regulars
Messages
229
Location
Pasadena, CA
LizzieMaine said:
It's a good idea, if you're going to teach a kid this kind of safety technique, to be really clear that it's only to be used in an actual emergency. My nephew once got piqued because my sister wouldn't buy him some bit of shiny junk or other at Wal-Mart and he began screaming HELP HELP YOURE NOT MY MOTHER HELP HELP DONT TOUCH ME HELP HELP. The result was extremely unpleasant for all involved.

My mother delights (now) in telling the story about the time I was misbehaving (I guess I was about 5 or 6) in the grocery store, and she told me quietly, "If you don't behave right now, you're going to get a spanking!" I started yelling "PLEASE DON'T BEAT ME MAMA PLEASE DON'T BEAT ME!!!"

Yes, it's funny now :) , but she was mortified. I'd never been "beaten" in my life...I have no idea why I would say that, other than to cause a scene.

Needless to say, I got a spanking anyway...just the normal whack on my little round, padded butt..in the parking lot!
 

Shearer

Practically Family
Messages
779
Location
Squaresville
Elaina said:
My apologies, it wasn't directed at your situation. I figured you knew the girl and that the mother let things go.

Oh, no need to apologize! I was just venting some more about the kid :D I agree with you 100% and I can't figure out why the mother just let's her go. Some people I guess! [huh]
 

Elaina

One Too Many
That's true, which is why I focus on the touching, running away and telling an adult. I don't even stipulate it has to be me, but SOMEONE that can stop it.


Sadly, we also need to educate these kids that molesters can be other kids. Don't ask how I know, but trust me.
 

Dan G

One of the Regulars
Messages
287
Location
Pensacola, FL
Thank you Etienne! Though I don't know about a gem... how's a colorful rock sound? ;)
Being clinicly shy, I didn't have any trouble at all ignoring people as a child. The trouble was my brother... We fought like nobody's business! My poor mother, we used to fight in public too. Oh man did we get spanked, she carried a wooden spoon in her purse and when we'd get going she'd yell for us to bend over in a tone hell itself would cringe, (which immediatly got us crying like you've never seen a kid cry) and she'd let us HAVE it! Once she actually broke a wooden spoon on my behind! heh heh, lol (laughing as I look back) we deserved every bit of it.
Dad was another story. He didn't need a spoon, and when we heard mom say "just wait till your father gets home":eusa_doh: we started praying with everything we had for Jesus to come get us before we got what we deserved!
My brother and I are now best friends, and we both think we didn't turn out half bad...
 

Forum statistics

Threads
109,140
Messages
3,074,930
Members
54,121
Latest member
Yoshi_87
Top