Let's Retire These Movie/TV Plots!

[Nathan Dodge]

How many times must we endure the one about the thief/safecracker/heist guy who comes out of retirement to pull "one last job" for either revenge or so he can quit for good?

Or the sitcom with the birth of a child in an "unusual" place to be delivered by the obviously "unqualified" sitcom star?

Let's also retire the "spinoff within an established TV series" plot. The Star Trek episode "Assignment: Earth" comes to mind, it dispenses with Kirk and crew almost entirely and they only emerge at the end with that sickening bit when Kirk and Spock wish Gary Seven and Roberta Lincoln "luck." Magnum, P.I. also pulled the spinoff trick, with the episode, "Two Birds of a Feather" with William Lucking as some pilot and Magnum nowhere to be found except at the end when he phones Lucking about the case or whatever.

Another tired premise is the "letting the audience know that their beloved main character will not be in this episode" routine. There was a Quincy episode, "Has Anyone Seen Quincy?" that had the Klug-Man absent from the entire episode and replaced with some Asian guy. The regular characters are either not seen, except for maybe one token scene and it's usually via a phone call or a hurried explanation by a supporting character, like that tried and untrue bit when Redd Foxx held out for more dough: "Oh, Fred Sanford? Why he's in St. Louis, but I'm Grady and I'll be here this week", or some such nonsense.

Any others?

 

[BeBopBaby]

I hate when a tv show starts to slip in ratings and they introduce the spunky, young, cute kid to make the ratings go up. I'm not a big fan of insipid uber cute child actors. Cousin Oliver, Scrappy-Do, Olivia, etc. can all return to the land of mediocrity for all I care. lol

 

[LizzieMaine]

The hotshot full-of-himself streetwise cop partnered with the old-school by-the-books partner. Just once I'd like to see By The Books teach Hotshot that yes, doing the all the paperwork and sticking to the system *IS* the way to go. And get a haircut, mister!

 

[Nathan Dodge]

And just once, could a witness NOT inform the bad guy that he/she is going to the police to turn said bad guy in, so that the bad guy won't kill them immediately afterwards?

 

[Feraud]

My favorite plot revolves around the "rogue cop".
He is too violent (to keep the streets clean of garbage), despises authority (damn that red tape!), and shoots first and asks questions later. How said police officer is never *actually busted down to patrolman is beyond me.
Whether he is uttering "Yippie Kie Yay..." or "Make my day" while spraying the city streets with as many lead pills as the bad guys, the rogue cop could use a well deserved rest.


*The Chief of Police frequently threatens just this punishment.

 

[Feraud]

The hotshot full-of-himself streetwise cop partnered with the old-school by-the-books partner. Just once I'd like to see By The Books teach Hotshot that yes, doing the all the paperwork and sticking to the system *IS* the way to go. And get a haircut, mister!

I agree LizzieM!

 

[Nathan Dodge]

How about having a suspected suicide actually be a suicide, rather than murder. That would put many 1970s detectives out of business, however, and we all know that Frank Cannon and Dr. Quincy need the work...

 

[Feraud]

..does the computer expert really need to be a nerd? I know some very cool computer guys.

No more outrunning explosions and taking gunshot wounds while continuing to fight.

 

[Naphtali]

What you object to is poor writing rather than the plot lines themselves. There is a limited number of plots. That's life. Live with it.

A good writer can create fresh entertainment from this limited number.

 

[Paisley]

Fifty-year-old man with a gorgeous, 25-year-old wife or girlfriend. That, and the man and woman who can't stand each other and don't have anything in common end up getting married. The 70-year-old men who run Hollywood need to get out of Beverly Hills now and then.

 

[Lady Day]

I dont object so to say, but what is the deal with the random 'interacial' relationships that just dot all of modern tv. Most of these people would have never met in their 'hollywood' neighborhoots. They do it not because the characters like one another, but cause it looks 'cool' and 'hot' :eusa_doh:
If they are gonna do it, put a modicum of realness in it. But it IS tv.

LD

 

[MisterPaul]

..does the computer expert really need to be a nerd? I know some very cool computer guys.

As a computer guy, I get a bit wrankled by this. I may be married with the obligatory 2 kids, but I still think I'm a handsome hunk o' heartbreak.

Here's a plot I would like to see retired: The rejected, downtrodden dog/cat/horse/alien/mental patient doesn't "go to live on the farm" because the oh-so-cute child actor loves them a whole bunch.

 

[Lady Day]

No more outrunning explosions ...

I never understoond HOW they can do that!

AND...does EVERY longshot have to work/succeed/pull through/win the game?

LD

 

[Tango Yankee]

Thanks, Napthali!

Was trying to remember whose law that was (Ninety percent of everything is crap. Sturgeon's Law) a little while ago, but was thinking it was Heinlein.

We now return you to the originally scheduled programming.

Cheers,
Tom

PS Ooops. Can't edit the title to fix my typo. Sorry! Guess I had Naptha on my mind. ;-)

 

[Mr. Sable]

I dont object so to say, but what is the deal with the random 'interacial' relationships that just dot all of modern tv. Most of these people would have never met in their 'hollywood' neighborhoots. They do it not because the characters like one another, but cause it looks 'cool' and 'hot' :eusa_doh:
If they are gonna do it, put a modicum of realness in it. But it IS tv.

LD

Most of my relationships have been random and interracial. It's not that unrealistic to me at all.

 

[Twitch]

As a writer of mostly all non-fiction historical subject matter I have seen storylines repeated or basically plagurized since I was a kid watching TV.

There are fewer and fewer programs that I can't figure out who did what because so many are parallels of older TV plots! There are so may universal plots that they keep reviving well beyond the retiring master crook theme that commenced this thread. There are more than I can describe that play out all too familiarly on the screen with previous scripts.

It's why the old Perry Mason, Twilight Zone, Alfred Hitchcock and similar plot twist scripts played out so well- they were truly original! But most of these can be remembered if you've seen some of them as much as I have over the decades. And they've even copied some of them for modern prime time shows.

It's just so blatantly unoriginal if you can recall themes and plots from days gone by. If you're 25 all these rehashed stories may be new to you though.

 

[jamespowers]

If Hollywood would stop remaking films over and over again that would be good too. It seems every ten to fifteen years something old is new again.
I mean here we go again with Transformers and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for the children. Geez, at least Disney just re-shows the movies in the theatre everyonce in a while without modernizing and thus (9 times out of 10) screwing up an older film with trendy actors and modern sets. :eusa_doh:

Regards,

J

 

[Lady Day]

Most of my relationships have been random and interracial. It's not that unrealistic to me at all.

As have some of mine, and we have often joke about its tv handeling lol


LD

 

[Senator Jack]

Years ago, my friend and I wrote a couple of pilots. One of them we called 'Sitcom!' and our premise was that the show would ONLY use recycled plots, but they would be done in a theatre of the absurd style. We had a list of about thirty right of the bat. They included:

Dividing an apartment down the middle
Evil Twin
Currently popular rock band makes guest appearance
12 Angry Men
Poker Night (including that tired joke "I guess that beats two pair. One pair of tens and another pair of tens.' Does any writer really believe he wrote that joke?)
Bowling Night
Ugly girl with glasses is beautiful
Running for local political office
Phony stock deal
Handcuffed
You saved my life
Getting stuck in bank vault/meat locker (We actually combined this into one episode. The characters are freed from the vault only to end up, by way of runaway guerney, in a meat locker)
Dr. Faustus (With John Tesh as Mephistophales)
Two dates on one night


That's all I remember, right now. Perhaps I can dig up the list with the rest of them.


Regards,

Senator Jack

 

[Paisley]

Let's also put to bed the Christmas special where a character sees the ghosts of Christmas past, present and future.