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As some of you know, some friends and I, in conjunction with Lush (the cosmetics company) did a nude calendar to raise money for a charity called Changing Faces, which helps people deal with disfigurement. Because of the nature of the charity, we felt it would be wrong to use Photoshop or similar to make ourselves look perfect, and it took a lot of courage for some of us to bare all (not me, I hasten to add because I am nothing but a brazen hussy!). One girl in particular has severe confidence issues and for her to pose for this calendar was a huge step for her.
The Daily Telegraph wanted to run a feature about the calendar, which was originally supposed to run yesterday. However, it got put back until today and two of the four photos (one of which was mine) that were supposed to be featured were dropped. This was fine by my - I've had my face (and more!) everywhere over the last 25 years - but I was really pleased that my aforementioned chum was getting her picture in the paper. A pic of the calendar cover was supposed to be featured too.
When push came to shove however, the article in the paper was less than complimentary and now this on the website:
Some of my friends are actually quite upset by this but I'm really a little annoyed about the opening paragraphs. As you scroll down it gets better but most people only read the first few lines. I think it could have been written better - some people are going to get the wrong end of the stick, I fear.
None of us are under any illusions about our bodies - jeebs, I've had three kids and frankly, it shows but we all did this to raise money. As did all the other people in the calendars. Nobody is forced to buy them and I personally have not seen any on sale in shops. The only ones I have seen have been professional ones of beefcake firemen (sorry, models pretending to be firemen) and they certainly aren't for charity.
There is a poll on the site, for which I was going to post a link but considering that there is nudity there (even if it is discreet), if anyone would like to vote for our calendar, please PM me and I'll give you the link.
Another friend at the Times is attempting to run another feature for us. Fingers crossed eh?
The Daily Telegraph wanted to run a feature about the calendar, which was originally supposed to run yesterday. However, it got put back until today and two of the four photos (one of which was mine) that were supposed to be featured were dropped. This was fine by my - I've had my face (and more!) everywhere over the last 25 years - but I was really pleased that my aforementioned chum was getting her picture in the paper. A pic of the calendar cover was supposed to be featured too.
When push came to shove however, the article in the paper was less than complimentary and now this on the website:
Does my bum look big in this calendar?
As more Britons strip off for charity than ever, Jan Moir makes a plea for modesty
In the name of faith, hope and especially charity, will the people of Great Britain please put their clothes back on? This instant. Right now. Without delay. What we mean is, what has got into you all?
This year, the number of individuals willing to pose stark blooming naked for 2007 charity calendars has reached plague-like proportions.
From every corner of the nation, they come a-wobbling in front of the cameras wearing nothing but a frozen smile and a naked desire to do their bit for the charity of their choice.
Good for them, yes? But it means that the rest of us are forced to confront newsagents' racks filled with the kind of sturdy Saxon torsos that were never designed to be viewed in the harsh light of day, except perhaps by pluckier members of the medical profession.
After rootling through acres of untanned and untoned flesh and somehow living to tell the tale, the calendars we feature here – and, in glorious technicolour, on our website – are among the most tasteful and cheerful culled from dozens produced by well-meaning citizens of Britain.
Check out Mr January, standing proud on the battlements of Stirling Castle as the cold, Scottish wind whirls around his ramparts. This is Alex Moffat, the aptly named hooker for Stirling Rugby Football Club, bravely raising funds for the local Strathcarron Hospice.
This is the second year that SRFC has produced a nude charity calendar and, says a club spokesman, there were plenty of volunteers.
"Oh, my God, no. It's harder getting them to keep their clothes on. The boys are always very accommodating. Although we did have to go to the castle this year because we didn't have a club cannon big enough."
Moving south - although not in every way - we encounter a rather more genteel calendar from the enterprising ladies of the Heald Green Theatre Company in Stockport.
They have stripped off to raise funds for the restoration of their theatre, which was damaged in storms last year. Their charming calendar, photographed by theatre chairman Cyril Hines, features a dozen theatre members, aged between 50 and 68, in a variety of refined poses, which they have christened with names such as Fur Coat and No Knickers, The Darling Buds of May and The Passionate Woman.
"The ladies were all a bit shy to start off with but there was no shortage of volunteers," said Mr Hines. Luckily, there was no shortage of cunningly draped pastel fabrics, either.
Meanwhile, our other picks include the firm, fox-hunting thighs of the ladies from the Oakley Hunt, who put their calendar together in aid of Thames Valley and Chiltern air ambulance service.
And workers from the Andover Nursing Home, boldly go where no health worker has gone before, to raise funds for the Alzheimer's Society and Breast Cancer Care. Make ours a large one, please, barmaid – oh thank goodness, she already has.
Those lovely shopkeepers in the small town of Highworth, near Swindon, got together to produce a charming calendar for Macmillan Cancer Support.
The butchers, the bakers and even the Christmas-cake makers from the town's high street grinned and bared it for a very good cause, even if their customers say that buying rock cakes or a pound of sausages is never going to be the same.
Moving out to the countryside, photographer Nicola de Pulford has been taking the shots for the Lady Farmers' calendar for many years. You don't officially have to be a mad cow to offer to pose for her, but it might help.
"All a farmer has to do is ring me up and we will go along and take his or her picture," said de Pulford, who also produces a male version of the calendar featuring the very best of British beef.
"We've been doing this for about seven years now and we sell the calendar all over the world. When I turn up, I've got no idea what the farmer and his wife are going to look like. But there is never any shortage of volunteers. I could fill the calendars for the next few years already."
The craze all started when some members of Rylestone branch of the Women's Institute launched their famous nude calendar to raise proceeds for leukaemia research in 1999.
After WI member Angela Baker's husband, John, was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma, the Rylestone women became determined to raise money and cheer themselves at the same time.
Their idea was to make a saucy calendar similar to the Pirelli one but featuring themselves and their WI crafts, such as jam- making and baking.
The calendar became a sensation, raising more than £1 million for charity on each side of the Atlantic and the story of how it came to be made was turned into a Hollywood film called Calendar Girls, starring Helen Mirren and Julie Walters.
So far, so good and the original calendar is rereleased every year to great effect. However, it did unwittingly tap into a hitherto unknown urge for normally shy and retiring British people to divest themselves of their outer garments and stampede towards the camera lens like naked lemmings. How did this happen?
For a start, we are supposed to be a nation of sexual repressives with a reputation for emotional froideur and a fondness for nice, warm socks and passion-killer knickers.
Flaunting acres of unabashed nakedness while patting a horse or pouring a glass of wine in a bar – well, come on. Surely that's the kind of thing the French get up to? Not us. Not the country that invented the game of tiddlywinks and thought that a perfectly adequate source of nocturnal thrills, thank you all the same?
Not the country that remains eternally grateful to its former prime minister, John Major, for inventing the original VIP method of keeping warm in winter (Vest In Pants), and whose national devotion to winceyette remains a joke across the rest of Europe?
Well, they can laugh if they like but deep in our national psyche, something wanton is stirring.
The compulsion for even the most rigorously heterosexual British man to dive into a pair of fishnets and a black rubber miniskirt at the first mention of a tarts'n'vicars party is well-documented, if not fully understood, by anthropologists, but now we're taking it one step further.
Over the past few years, British people have queued up to pose for New-York-born artist Spencer Tunick, who specialises in photographing scenes of mass nudity in public places, such as Selfridges in London's Oxford Street, outside the former Saatchi gallery on the banks of the Thames, and on the quayside in Newcastle, where 1,700 Geordies were photographed naked together two years ago.
OK. Fair enough. Good for us. Yet the hardcore nude calendar model knows that there is safety in numbers, almost regarding it as a bit of a cheat.
For them, the only way forward is to let it all hang out, with only the most unsightly of horrors hidden by strategically placed plant pots or similar.
There are more fabulous pictures from these brave and wonderful people on our website, while elsewhere, those of a sensitive disposition are advised that there is no escape from this full-frontal attack.
The nude charity calendar epidemic might make some of you yearn for the traditional blandness of a misty landscape or a saucer-eyed kitten as you look up your next dentist appointment. But as it's all for a good cause you must give, give, give until it hurts. Ouch.
Some of my friends are actually quite upset by this but I'm really a little annoyed about the opening paragraphs. As you scroll down it gets better but most people only read the first few lines. I think it could have been written better - some people are going to get the wrong end of the stick, I fear.
None of us are under any illusions about our bodies - jeebs, I've had three kids and frankly, it shows but we all did this to raise money. As did all the other people in the calendars. Nobody is forced to buy them and I personally have not seen any on sale in shops. The only ones I have seen have been professional ones of beefcake firemen (sorry, models pretending to be firemen) and they certainly aren't for charity.
There is a poll on the site, for which I was going to post a link but considering that there is nudity there (even if it is discreet), if anyone would like to vote for our calendar, please PM me and I'll give you the link.
Another friend at the Times is attempting to run another feature for us. Fingers crossed eh?