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How do folks react to your hat wearing?

GHT

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,775
Location
New Forest
We were at an all day vintage festival yesterday. It's called "Summertime Swing," if you want to look it up. My hat got comment after comment, all because my missus came up with the idea of pinning an MG badge in the hat ribbon. People actually thought that the badge came with the hat, I was even wearing my MG shirt with MG badges for buttons. You can see the shirt and all the rest on the "What hat," thread: https://www.thefedoralounge.com/threads/what-hat-are-you-wearing-today.94860/page-861#post-2573099

My missus said that I should tell them that I found the hat in the MG catalogue, but if I did, I'm sure that some would believe me, even with my tongue pressed firmly in my cheek.

It was, as ever, a really great day.

summertime swing.jpg summertime swing 2019 013.JPG summertime swing 2019 014.JPG summertime swing 2019 015.JPG MG hat pin 001.JPG
 

Bertie.Wooster

One of the Regulars
Messages
121
Location
London, UK
Hello all,

I am here to seek the wiser advice from the kind members of this excellent forum. I currently go to a boarding school and during weekends, we are allowed to wear home clothes (not school uniform, yay). I really really like hats and people know me as the 'hat guy' at school.

I want to sport a brown trilby or a bowler during a weekend but I am too scared since some people will make fun of me and I am not the most confidence person among my peers.

Any comments to boost confidence or similar experiences?
 
Messages
11,369
Location
Alabama
Bertie, The fact that you posted the question, albeit anonymously, shows me that you have more confidence than you think. You say you're already known as the "hat guy", why should you be any different wearing home clothes? Wearing what one likes and feels good wearing generally shows up in ones demeanor as confidence. It's said all the time here, "wear the hat don't let it wear you." Do your best to ignore those who make fun of you. They are the ones lacking confidence and self esteem by directing their shortcomings towards you. I dress western most days, from hats to boots. Not a lot of people dress similarly in the area I live and I've received very few negative comments. Most people that know me wouldn't recognize me otherwise. You keep wearing your hats and it will be the same for you.
 
Messages
19,412
Location
Funkytown, USA
Bertie, The fact that you posted the question, albeit anonymously, shows me that you have more confidence than you think. You say you're already known as the "hat guy", why should you be any different wearing home clothes? Wearing what one likes and feels good wearing generally shows up in ones demeanor as confidence. It's said all the time here, "wear the hat don't let it wear you." Do your best to ignore those who make fun of you. They are the ones lacking confidence and self esteem by directing their shortcomings towards you. I dress western most days, from hats to boots. Not a lot of people dress similarly in the area I live and I've received very few negative comments. Most people that know me wouldn't recognize me otherwise. You keep wearing your hats and it will be the same for you.

Couldn't have said it better.
 

Bertie.Wooster

One of the Regulars
Messages
121
Location
London, UK
Bertie, The fact that you posted the question, albeit anonymously, shows me that you have more confidence than you think. You say you're already known as the "hat guy", why should you be any different wearing home clothes? Wearing what one likes and feels good wearing generally shows up in ones demeanor as confidence. It's said all the time here, "wear the hat don't let it wear you." Do your best to ignore those who make fun of you. They are the ones lacking confidence and self esteem by directing their shortcomings towards you. I dress western most days, from hats to boots. Not a lot of people dress similarly in the area I live and I've received very few negative comments. Most people that know me wouldn't recognize me otherwise. You keep wearing your hats and it will be the same for you.

That has really convinced me! Thank you so much! I appreciate your brave and encouraging words. Thanks to the others as well. The Regency Gentlemen does make me feel a bit better. ;)
 

GHT

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,775
Location
New Forest
Who cares what folks think or say, do what YOU like! Too many folks rely on other opinions now days.
Doing what you like is my advice too, however, I remember my teenage years and the self imposed pressure not to 'belong.' I bought the latest chart records because everyone else did. I wore 60's Mod fashions, here today and gone tomorrow, because everyone else did.

Today's dressed down general appearance is endemic across all generations, even wearing a neck tie will get you noticed. Then there's the bullying element to deal with. Wear a baseball cap, back to front, and you won't get a second glance, where something distinguished on your head and will certainly get noticed.

Being at boarding school my guess is that you wear a school cap, you might also have a straw boater, so that's a start. You need to wear your hat with confidence, if you are something of an introvert, that won't be easy, but persevere and you will find the extravert in yourself. Before you know it you will be wearing two tone shoes along with your hat, then a double breasted jacket with wide lapels, then baggy trousers with turned up cuffs at the hem. You will look amazing, and when you start earning out there in the big world, you might even be seen in a vintage car.
 

suitedcboy

One Too Many
Messages
1,348
Location
Fort Worth Texas or thereabouts
Get some non-stick cooking spray and spray in your ears. Just kidding. You do need to behave as though you've done that. To develop a sense of self that doesn't rely on approval of others is a great feat and has rewards. Many very successful and creative people succeeded for that reason, their ideas were not inline with the norm. When we are young we usually want to fit in and seek the approval of others as a way to somehow feel we are doing the right thing. I was the hat guy when I was adolescent and got lots of comments. I opted to pay no mind, especially since the persons making the comments were not persons I want to be like. I would bet that many that make these comments are not ones you want to pattern yourself after. First, disregard. Second, wear your hat like it was not there. No timidity, no bad posture, no fear of eye contact, and no expression of fear or displeasure on your face. Good luck, it will get better.
 

scottyrocks

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,178
Location
Isle of Langerhan, NY
All the above advice is good, and what I would recommend, as well, but I will not discount the differences between the average young man and the average, um, mature gentleman.

Many of us here have been around long enough to not give a wit as to what other people think, and rock our styles without a care in the world. A young(er) man, on average, lacking life experience and being more easily succumbable to social pressure, can have a tougher internal battle.
 
Messages
19,001
Location
Central California
We are all social animals and there is an evolutionary reason why we try to conform. Even those who see themselves as rugged individualists conform in all sorts of ways they aren’t perhaps aware of. We learn that there are areas where you can express individuality and areas where we are expected to conform. These unwritten social expectations serve legitimate purposes. I’m all for being comfortable with yourself and doing as you see fit and not trying to please everyone else, but it’s not weakness or insecurity that causes most of us to conform. Even the nonconformist often end up confirming in their own way. As an example, biker clubs refusing to conform to society create their own subsets where conformity is then strictly enforced.

Wearing a brimmed hat, beret, etc., will set you apart from most everyone else. It’s a deviation, but not so much that we’ll cause the fabric of society to unravel.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
 

Rmccamey

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,841
Location
Central Texas
And if you wear baggy trousers, a jacket, two-toned shoes and a hat to the Prom or other formal occassion, you'll be a smash hit! Everyone will want to talk to you and everyone will want a selfie with the cool dude with the hat! If you want to go all-out, take along a nice vintage cane or walking stick!

Doing what you like is my advice too, however, I remember my teenage years and the self imposed pressure not to 'belong.' I bought the latest chart records because everyone else did. I wore 60's Mod fashions, here today and gone tomorrow, because everyone else did.

Today's dressed down general appearance is endemic across all generations, even wearing a neck tie will get you noticed. Then there's the bullying element to deal with. Wear a baseball cap, back to front, and you won't get a second glance, where something distinguished on your head and will certainly get noticed.

Being at boarding school my guess is that you wear a school cap, you might also have a straw boater, so that's a start. You need to wear your hat with confidence, if you are something of an introvert, that won't be easy, but persevere and you will find the extravert in yourself. Before you know it you will be wearing two tone shoes along with your hat, then a double breasted jacket with wide lapels, then baggy trousers with turned up cuffs at the hem. You will look amazing, and when you start earning out there in the big world, you might even be seen in a vintage car.
 

GHT

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,775
Location
New Forest
This might have been a good posting for the black fedora, love 'em or hate 'em thread, but as there are two very positive responses to hat wearing, I chose this thread.

We went to a reunion lunch today, I was up early and got all dressed up ready before my missus. While she was in the shower I went out to get the old MG washed and polished. Whilst there, a young woman, about mid twenties came over and said, "It's hard to know whether to compliment your car, or your dapper self," then added, "what type of hat is it?" "A fedora," I told her, "can I photograph you?" she asked. How could I resist? She went on to tell me that her parents live on the outskirts of London and that Dad has a pre-war Austin. To which I told her that I was familiar with the model. She said that she was going to text her Dad with the photo of the car and myself. "Give Dad my compliments," I said. "I certainly will," she replied and then added, "I can't get over your hat, it's just brilliant." Fancy me making an impression on one so young!

From there I went to the garage that sells the top quality unleaded. Carefully filling up, a voice behind me said: "What a beauty!" Looking around a middle aged lady stood there admiring my car. Then she looked at me, all dressed up, and said: "Are you off to a show?" "No," I answered, "I'm taking my wife out to lunch." "And you're all dressed up for a date with your wife?" She replied. "Indeed I am," I told her. Looking at the car again she repeated herself, "well she is certainly a beauty." "That's true," I said smiling, "I've been married to her for more than fifty years." "Oh you old charmer," she said, "you just made my day, may I take your photo?"
This is becoming a habit.
So what was it, apart from a vintage MG that made the ladies smile. Here's two photos. One taken today with the black fedora, the other taken last week with the same outfit of clothes, I included it so that you can see the trousers that Tina made.
ambulance reunion lunch 005.JPG Twinwood 2019 011.JPG
 

Dm101

A-List Customer
Messages
496
Location
Maryland
This might have been a good posting for the black fedora, love 'em or hate 'em thread, but as there are two very positive responses to hat wearing, I chose this thread.

We went to a reunion lunch today, I was up early and got all dressed up ready before my missus. While she was in the shower I went out to get the old MG washed and polished. Whilst there, a young woman, about mid twenties came over and said, "It's hard to know whether to compliment your car, or your dapper self," then added, "what type of hat is it?" "A fedora," I told her, "can I photograph you?" she asked. How could I resist? She went on to tell me that her parents live on the outskirts of London and that Dad has a pre-war Austin. To which I told her that I was familiar with the model. She said that she was going to text her Dad with the photo of the car and myself. "Give Dad my compliments," I said. "I certainly will," she replied and then added, "I can't get over your hat, it's just brilliant." Fancy me making an impression on one so young!

From there I went to the garage that sells the top quality unleaded. Carefully filling up, a voice behind me said: "What a beauty!" Looking around a middle aged lady stood there admiring my car. Then she looked at me, all dressed up, and said: "Are you off to a show?" "No," I answered, "I'm taking my wife out to lunch." "And you're all dressed up for a date with your wife?" She replied. "Indeed I am," I told her. Looking at the car again she repeated herself, "well she is certainly a beauty." "That's true," I said smiling, "I've been married to her for more than fifty years." "Oh you old charmer," she said, "you just made my day, may I take your photo?"
This is becoming a habit.
So what was it, apart from a vintage MG that made the ladies smile. Here's two photos. One taken today with the black fedora, the other taken last week with the same outfit of clothes, I included it so that you can see the trousers that Tina made.
View attachment 183820 View attachment 183819

Sitting here at my lab desk giggling like a little kid.
Love your posts...and photos too.
Smoother than cream cheese man...just smooth.
 

GHT

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,775
Location
New Forest
Doesn't stuff like that just make your whole day?! :)
It certainly does, it might be quaint but, I love to refer to going out with my missus as a date. And why not?
Sitting here at my lab desk giggling like a little kid.
Love your posts...and photos too.
Smoother than cream cheese man...just smooth.
Glad I made you smile, the young lady was particularly pleasing because I felt a sense of privilege that she could trust me, a stranger and a much older, (than her) man. But she was relaxed and simply asked about the hat and the car.
 

Big Steve

A-List Customer
Messages
347
It's a funny thing....At a certain point it seems one's interest in hats goes from an occasional wearer with a stingier brim, to an I don't 'care' anymore attitude, and you're rocking 3' plus wide brims with aplomb. I've always been into hats, however, it's only been quasi recent that I've truly built up the devil may care attitude that goes so so well with hat-wearing. I wear them now to be enjoyed and care less and less what others may/may not think. Funny how it all works.
 

Hat and Rehat

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,444
Location
Denver
We were at an all day vintage festival yesterday. It's called "Summertime Swing," if you want to look it up. My hat got comment after comment, all because my missus came up with the idea of pinning an MG badge in the hat ribbon. People actually thought that the badge came with the hat, I was even wearing my MG shirt with MG badges for buttons. You can see the shirt and all the rest on the "What hat," thread: https://www.thefedoralounge.com/threads/what-hat-are-you-wearing-today.94860/page-861#post-2573099

My missus said that I should tell them that I found the hat in the MG catalogue, but if I did, I'm sure that some would believe me, even with my tongue pressed firmly in my cheek.

It was, as ever, a really great day.

View attachment 179535 View attachment 179536 View attachment 179537 View attachment 179538 View attachment 179539

I haven't been subscribed to this thread for a while.
That looks like a fabulous time!

Sent from my LM-X410(FG) using Tapatalk
 

Hat and Rehat

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,444
Location
Denver
Hello all,

I am here to seek the wiser advice from the kind members of this excellent forum. I currently go to a boarding school and during weekends, we are allowed to wear home clothes (not school uniform, yay). I really really like hats and people know me as the 'hat guy' at school.

I want to sport a brown trilby or a bowler during a weekend but I am too scared since some people will make fun of me and I am not the most confidence person among my peers.

Any comments to boost confidence or similar experiences?
People saying negative things, or looking at you askew, rarely occurs. I suppose close friends or family might take the opportunity to rib you a little. ( Or some jerk you've known forever)
Wait until you go a few places and complete strangers compliment your hat. Even better if they're of the opposite sex.
You'll never have to wash your hair again!

Sent from my LM-X410(FG) using Tapatalk
 
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