The gran is part of the character of goatskin. Washing the leather will bring out more grain. Your best bet is to sell the jacket and buy another.
Do you think this leather will stretch?
All leather will stretch. How much do you want to stretch the leather because the fit looks fine?
If there is something I've learned from this obsession, its that if there is something with the jacket that bugs you, no matter how much it cost or how high quality it is, you are better off selling it and getting what you really want. Its better to lose a bit in the selling re-buyng process and end up with something you will wear than having a very expensive jacket live in the closet. Thats a bigger waste of money imo.
I agree 100%. If I get a jacket and there is just something about it that doesn't seem right; then every time I put that jacket on, my eyes will zero right in on the "fault" - even if the fault is barely noticeable.