Dating for Fedora Loungers?

[Hemingway Jones]

Please stay off politics.. It's a thin line, but let's stay on this side of it.
Thanks.

 

[AmateisGal]

What experience have people had with dating somebody new who was not into vintage, and trying to get them interested?

My husband has been very receptive to it. Of course, I think his fondness for Indiana Jones has something to do with it. I don't think I'll get him to wear a vintage suit, but he'll swing dance and wear a fedora.

 

[HepKitty]

It all depends. Clearly you value those things so if my spouse felt similarly then I would be taking her for granted were I to do as you suggest. I would be saying hey thanks for all the wonderful things you do for me but its too much effort for me to do this to make you happy. However other people may be just as happy growing fat together. Therefore its not really about specifics, its about wanting to do what makes the other person happy.

I"m not saying that at all. I'm saying that the effort should be equal on both sides. if you don't put much effort into things why should she?

in any case good luck

 

[AtomicEraTom]

Anyone who says a woman can't do a man's job just as well as a man can is more full of it than a Christmas goose! When I was young, my father was a lather and fell of a scaffold and was hurt, which forced my mother to go back to work. She got a job at Wisconsin Cheeseman and worked her way up to Maintenance Mechanic and did that for 13 years there, and recently came to the Cheese Plant where I work and is Maintenance here now.

Her mother runs the largest hair salon in Milwaukee County, which has a men's and women's sections. She's been doing that since the early 70's and has no intention of retiring, she's 68. \

Frankly, I have no problem with being Mr. Mom myself. I could take care of the kids, fix up the house, and restore and sell antiques and cars, while the Mrs. went to work.

also worthy of note, that in the 40s women held MEN's jobs, even the dangerous ones. like the WASP pilots, they taught, they tested planes after repair, they pulled "trailers" so that the troops could have target practice... never mind the ground-based factory workers, welders, etc

so no nothing wrong with women working. but there is something wrong with men who think they don't have to do anything because women work now too

 

[Kiri]

I suppose I'm old fashioned (big surprise seeing as I'm part of this forum, hmm?) but I like the idea of the man working and the wife being a stay at home mom. That's what I'd like to do. Sadly, you don't see that much anymore, what with feminism and costs and more taxes and everything. I admit I don't know that much about it all though, being not even 17. I'm learning as best I can though.

Anyways. I've never dated, and don't plan on starting for a good while. I'd like to get married in my twenties, and I see no point in getting into a relationship while still in your teens. It just makes it harder to wait. In my way of thinking, that's one of the most important parts of your life, you're preparing to enter the adult world. I don't think it's just a time to laze around and goof off. If you spend your teenage years bucking responsibility, how the heck are you going to shoulder it throughout the rest of your life! Sorry, got slightly off topic there.

I would like to marry someone into vintage. I could handle him not being vintage, but it would be the icing on top if he was. I try to dress vintage everyday, mostly 1940's - 1950's. My first love is the forties hair, but I also enjoy the 1950's style of dressing.Granted, there's much more to a relationship than just clothes and that sort of thing. But it makes up a good part of my interests and the parts it doesn't directly impact it usually gets mixed up in anyways. If that makes any sense at all.

One more thing to add is I'm Messianic Jewish and the man I marry would most definitely have to be a believer as well. I also grew up with the Jewish feasts and all of that, so if he wasn't Jewish and knew them already, I'd love for him to learn everything about it. I can't imagine living the rest of my life not celebrating the Jewish holidays, and I definitely want my kids to grow up with them and with a relationship with God.


Sorry for the long post, I'm sure most of it is off topic. I tend to ramble on, sometimes making sense, other times not so much.

 

[ScionPI2005]

What experience have people had with dating somebody new who was not into vintage, and trying to get them interested?

I've never really tried to get any of my dates interested in vintage. They either have already had some sort of curiosity for it, or don't care for it altogether. Even then, most have found some middle ground and accept the fact that my interest seems to fit, and make me a part of who I am.

My fedoras are a perfect example of this. In regards to dates, I have been met with responses ranging from, "I hate those hats!" to "Those are really cool hats, and they look good on you and fit your personality!"

 

[Jack Scorpion]

My husband has been very receptive to it. Of course, I think his fondness for Indiana Jones has something to do with it. I don't think I'll get him to wear a vintage suit, but he'll swing dance and wear a fedora.

I find it less likely that someone would have absolutely no interest in vintage. There's always at least some old actor/actress they can fall in love with, right?

I guess it is easier for guys. Girls and women seem to take to vintage styles easily because, well, vintage styles look great on girls, even now, even to their peers, whether the peers are interested in vintage or not.

For instance, I went to a Vintage Expo in Santa Monica a few months ago, and 90% of the customers were girls and women. Most weren't even wearing vintage style clothing at the time. They just wanted to shop there. (Of course, I couldn't buy anything there, because back in the 40's and 50's, all men were size Small or XXL, and nobody was over 5 feet.)

My girlfriend is hardly vintage. She'll try on dresses at a store and toss them aside for being too "50's", etc., and she still thinks the 90's were cool. But she loves old musicals and she's fascinated with her grandmother's life.

I guess what I am trying to say is... everyone's at least a little bit vintage, right?

 

[Panache]

It occurs to me that it doesn't really matter if one person in a relationship is interested in vintage fashion and the other isn't. A matched set is nice and all but sometimes contrast is wonderful too.

I like tweed jackets, ties, hats (not to mention Frank Sinatra, old B&W movies. ). My lovely wife likes the way I dress but really isn't that interested in dressing in a more "stuffy" vintage way (and is very dubious of any B&W movie lol ).

But we work as a couple. She is the Emma Peel to my John Steed

And I wouldn't have it any other way

Cheers

Jamie

 

[dhermann1]

My old GF wasn't particularly into vintage, but she was into swing dancing (where we met) and loved the vintage clothes I bought her. She enjoyed wearing the 40's evening wear I got her (she looked smashing) and we used to look pretty spiffy with me in my tux and her in her gown.

 

[HepKitty]

Frankly, I have no problem with being Mr. Mom myself. I could take care of the kids, fix up the house, and restore and sell antiques and cars, while the Mrs. went to work.

that's not doing nothing though is it? I had my ex in mind when I wrote this, who did nothing

 

[HepKitty]

Anyways. I've never dated, and don't plan on starting for a good while. I'd like to get married in my twenties, and I see no point in getting into a relationship while still in your teens. It just makes it harder to wait. In my way of thinking, that's one of the most important parts of your life, you're preparing to enter the adult world. I don't think it's just a time to laze around and goof off. If you spend your teenage years bucking responsibility, how the heck are you going to shoulder it throughout the rest of your life! Sorry, got slightly off topic there.

you have a couple important points: dating making it harder to wait, and spending hs/college time on yourself and figuring yourself out and what you want to do with your life. focus on your education if you go to college. it's also important to have some fun here, travel, hobbies, friends, whatever. do what YOU want to do

however when you do start dating you may be a little short in what to put up with and what not to put up with if you're careful. dating is important to see what is out there, how men (in your case) work, think, act, etc. don't get stuck on any one guy right off the bat, it's good to see which one will be best for you and vice versa. learning which little things to let slide (we all have annoying quirks) and which little things are monstrous problems is incredibly important, and that goes for everyone you meet. just as important is learning how you act in a relationship because we're all a little different around different people. don't shelter yourself too much, because there's just too much to learn about life

 

[shopgirl61]

So where does everyone find their opposite nostalgia lovers?

jonnyelvis, you asked a very simple question and this thread has taken on a life of its own fftopic: with everything from dissing tatoos to husband/wife issues and things that clearly have NOTHING to do with your original question.
I myself am sorry this happened and think that if people here cannot answer a simple question without delving into childish, inexperianced behaviours and obvious self engaging politics then a mod ought to close this thread!. if you need to start a non- lounge group of likewise folks... lemme know

 

[John in Covina]

This question has been "sort of" done previously.

The best answer for those looking is to be involved with local groups that are part of the vintage scene in some context. If you can find people with a connected interest for vintage stuff you may connect there. So a list might be as to vintage inspired: swing dancing, car collector shows, re-enactors, collectors of other items, music, fashion and historian types. If this is very hard to find in your area then see if you can start some type of club or activities. If not, then consider a move to a hot bed of vintage as seen in the events section.

Best wishes!

 

[Tomasso]

if people here cannot answer a simple question without delving into childish, experienced behaviours and obvious self engaging politics......

 

[Amy Jeanne]

lol lol lol

I've found this thread to be quite entertaining!!

 

[Paisley]

^^ lol

 

[facade]

J

Yes, with all this crimethink happening, something must be done!

 

[Crafty Doll]

Common values are much more important than common interests. Interests change over the life of a marriage but values are what sustain it.

Now that we are in our 60's neither my wife nor I have hardly any of the same interests we had in our 20's but our values have remained constant over the course of our 38 year marriage.

And don't underestimate a good sense of humor.

This is a great piece of advice. Thank you for this.

 

[Rats Riley]

My missus simply rolls her eyes... When we first started dating, we were both photo students going into commercial photography. She started dressing kind of vintage, probably because I usually dressed like a slick.

Now that we've been hitched for 10 plus years, she's turned into a Desperate Housewives rerun.:eusa_doh:

Yeah I love her... but I kinda miss my "girl next door" with the "Oh yeah?!" attitude.

 

[Aristaeus]

Hasn't happened. Probably won't happen at all, until I get out of this forsaken desert. I had much better luck meeting people in Portland.

Figure I'll be happy enough alone for the next few years.

What part of Nevada? I was stationed at NAS Fallon for two years and I really enjoyed the area.