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Dating etiquette

Dr Doran

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jamespowers said:
Yes and you can save the cost of a movie and dinner if you find out she is saying, "Yes, something might happen between us, but not because I think you are particularly interesting, but because you just happened to come along when I was feeling like having a man." ;) :p

lol :p lol :)
 

lauwalton

New in Town
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30
Location
Texas
I have many stories (sad to say) but heres my absolute worst and most embarassing one: I had been dating this guy for a couple monts. I was previously divorced and have two kids from that failed marriage. Needless to say, I'm quite young, and look even younger. When my boyfriend decided to introduce me to his parents, he went on to say "She has two beautiful little boys". His mom's face went into a state of complete shock. All she said was "Are they black?" My face fell into complete shock mode, my boyfriend became extremely red, and all i could do is turn around. I walked into another room to get my stuff (hinting to my boyfriend I was ready to go), then I overheard her asking if i was a "promiscuous"(for better term) girl. I have never been more embarassed in my life!
 

Dr Doran

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lauwalton said:
His mom's face went into a state of complete shock. All she said was "Are they black?" My face fell into complete shock mode, my boyfriend became extremely red, and all i could do is turn around. I walked into another room to get my stuff (hinting to my boyfriend I was ready to go), then I overheard her asking if i was a "promiscuous"(for better term) girl. I have never been more embarassed in my life!

I am ordinarily the last person to be oversensitive to the sorts of things that very sensitive people often label racist, but this is really awful and this woman is horrid.

And, yes, it is she who should feel bad, not you.
 

Dr Doran

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Oh, I just remembered a doozy, sparked by LauWalton's horror story about her date's mother's offensive misspeaking.

About 7 years ago I had begun dating the girl mentioned above, whom I had met in Latin 2 at Berkeley. A few dates in, she took me to meet her parents in San Jose. I had not met them yet. Her mother, I knew, was English, and supposedly very proper in many respects, which I normally appreciate.

The mother had had a few as she had begun drinking at 5 and it was now 7. The subject turned to religion. I knew that my date's father was a Catholic or ex-Catholic. He was very mild mannered, and his wife quite fiery. She launched into a diatribe against the Catholic church. It lasted a good many minutes and would be considered over the top even to persons who do not like that church. After 15 minutes of this, the father said, "ahem," and then, "and so Tim, what religion are you?"

I responded, "Catholic." (This was back when I was in fact a Catholic.)

You could have heard a pin drop.

No one spoke then the dad said, "How bout another drink folks? Guinness, Tim? More wine, darling?"

My date, who knew I was Catholic, had brought me to her parents' house without telling them! A few days later I brought up the amazing rudeness of going on a diatribe against a religion without determining whether persons present might be members of it. MY DATE ACTUALLY DEFENDED HER MOTHER, saying "Well, it's her house. She can say what she wants."

Soon we broke up, partially because of this, and I married a Catholic. (Then years later I became an atheist. Ha ha!)
 
Such faux pas, while they haven't had a chance to impact my dating life--because I've never had one:eek:--are actually a big chunk of the reason I'm estranged from most of my living relatives, and why I take such great pains to see to it that what little necessary dealings with them I may have to have and any potential personal relationships of my own are kept as far away from each other as possible.
 

MaryDeluxe

Practically Family
Messages
794
Location
Deluxeville!
I have a million but here's one of my favorites! Yes, i laugh about this now!;)
In my early 20's, I was introduced to a guy at a party by one of my guy friends. The new guy asked me for a date. I agreed. First date went well so we agreed to meet the following friday for a second date. My date called me on that sunday to say that he had forgotten that all the guys were going out for a friend's birthday that coming friday and could we reschedule to sat. night. I agreed to the change of plans. I called date on Sat. afternoon to check on plans for that night. He was very abrupt and rude to me and said he was not feeling well and needed to cancel the date. Hmmm I thought something was weird so I called the guy friend who introduced me to him. My guy friend told me that the night before my date had met a new girl when they were out partying and made a date with her for Sat. and was planning on dumping me! :D Well that was that and I never talked to him again!

Fast forward year and half later....one day I get a phone call from that same date who dumped me for another. He just wanted to say hello and see if I remembered him! He just wanted to apologize and ask me for another date to make up for it! hahahaha My respose, Yes I remember you...and you can apologize to me by never calling me again... CLICK!
 

Dr Doran

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I am sure sorry to hear about that, DB. I have a current relative problem going on: my brother and I got into a fight a year ago and he still is not talking to me. JUST ONE PUNCH, delivered after many insults on his part and much stoic putting up with insults on my part -- and he STILL bears a grudge despite many apologies. A year later.

My other relatives might be annoying if I gave them the chance, but I always make sure to amuse the heck out of them and so they go home laughing and smiling. But they're pretty nice to begin with.
 
Doran said:
I am sure sorry to hear about that, DB. I have a current relative problem going on: my brother and I got into a fight a year ago and he still is not talking to me. JUST ONE PUNCH, delivered after many insults on his part and much stoic putting up with insults on my part -- and he STILL bears a grudge despite many apologies. A year later.

My other relatives might be annoying if I gave them the chance, but I always make sure to amuse the heck out of them and so they go home laughing and smiling. But they're pretty nice to begin with.

If the brother was insulting you then he should expect that sort of thing. What did he think he was going to get from you? Flowers!?:eusa_doh: :rolleyes:
 

Dr Doran

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jamespowers said:
If the brother was insulting you then he should expect that sort of thing. What did he think he was going to get from you? Flowers!?:eusa_doh: :rolleyes:

I appreciate that, James. Thank you. Obviously Charles (the punchee) does not see it this way. My wife was 9 months pregnant at that moment, and to be perfectly honest, the way he was acting with the insults and all worried me a bit for her safety. I thought he might start pushing me and who knows what might have happened. We had been drinking, and we had attended our sister's funeral a few hours before, and he had been up most of the night finishing a memorial video. He was clearly in a crazy state. The sensible thing seemed to me to drop him on the ground immediately. Efficiently. No fuss, no muss. I did say, "Don't ever call me an idiot again." He then called the cops, pressed charges, and circulated an extremely prejudicial version of the tale to ALL the relatives; however, the judge (not a baby boomer, thank God) saw things my way and instead of misdemeanor assault, which my brother charged me with, I received Disturbing the Peace. Hundred dollar fine was waived.
 
My great-uncle (one of the relatives I actually am on good terms with, too bad he's all the way back in Hoosierland) used to be an Army MP, and told me that the immediate punch-out was how he had been trained to deal with someone believed to be a physical danger.

Good tactical judgment, very efficient improvised plan. My field marshal's cap's off to you, sir...
 

Dr Doran

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Diamondback said:
My great-uncle (one of the relatives I actually am on good terms with, too bad he's all the way back in Hoosierland) used to be an Army MP, and told me that the immediate punch-out was how he had been trained to deal with someone believed to be a physical danger.

Good tactical judgment, very efficient improvised plan. My field marshal's cap's off to you, sir...

Thanks DB!
 

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