Breastfeeding In Public

[RedShoesGirl]

...Of course I'm aslo offended by thongs peeking out of too low of jeans too. So it may be immodesty offends me.

Elaina

i am much more offended at men who have great hanging stomachs who think nothing of walking around without shirts on perhaps even in shorts. come on, have some class here! it is an aesthetic offense.

not much really bothers me, i am a duck and everything, including all kinds of human behavious and supposedly offensive words roll right off my back. when you decide those words have no power over you, then you aren't offended. just like breastfeeding.

and who would have thunk it, this conversation still going 'round years after i breastfed my son - in public with a blanket.

breast milk in a bottle is silly (for public consumption) and besides, like someone else said, bobbies full of milk HURT!

here is another question - men on the side of the road - why whip it out to take a leak on the side of the bloody freeway?! that's what off-ramps are for.

really, it is the whole breast as sexual organ that get people all hot and bothered over the breastfeeding in public question.


rsg

 

[Phil]

Persoinally I don't mind breast feeding as long as its done with tact. The blanket is an excellent example. As long as it doesn't feel like a Girls Gone Wild shoot, I'm fine. I'd prefer a quiet baby that's sucking out their mother's milk than one wailing and screaming for some food.

 

[Veronica Parra]

As long as it doesn't feel like a Girls Gone Wild shoot, ...

How can you even equate one with the other?

 

[Roger]

Not to be a smart aleck, but "what age should it end?" What if a woman is breastfeeding a 4 year old?[huh]

 

[TheLovelyLolly]

Hi everyone. I'm a newbie here, but I feel I just have to add to this thread!!

I've alway been bewildered when people start complaining about breastfeeding mothers "stripping down to the waist and exposing themselves aggresively and wantonly" as I have never seen that happen!! Ever!! And I've breastfed 2 babies myself so have been around quite a few breastfeeding mums!!

To be honest, even if the baby is not swaddled in a blanket, by the time you lift one side of your blouse and attach the baby, you can't see any breast nor even any stomach... it is all covered up with the baby!! Your entire nipple and a good mouthful of the surrounding breast is in the baby's mouth!!

....and I agree about the breastmilk in bottles being silly! Apart from pumping the milk out in the first place, sterilizing the bottle, keeping the milk cool and then finding somewhere to heat it up when the baby is ready to drink it; if you miss a feed and your breasts are full of milk, you have to go home and pump it out anyway or else you end up with blocked milk ducts and/or mastitis!!

That's why we have breasts in the first place!!!!

 

[mysterygal]

2.) Breastfeeding is done exclusively by women, so it is a topic that seems suited to the Powder Room. If this isn't the case, I'm open to hear the reasons why not.
Bye!

.

Even though it is exclusively done by women, obviously, it effects men as well.

 

[Veronica Parra]

Not to be a smart aleck, but "what age should it end?" What if a woman is breastfeeding a 4 year old?[huh]

That's opening a whole different can of beans. If a kid is still suckling at that age, he or she isn't doing it for the milk. Not a good thing.

.

 

[Veronica Parra]

Even though it is exclusively done by women, obviously, it effects men as well.

But men can't do it, and they can't control whether a woman does it or not.

.

 

[mysterygal]

But men can't do it, and they can't control whether a woman does it or not.

.

true. But from what I'm reading, it's very obvious that it is making them uncomfortable as well when women breastfeed 'au natural'. As a woman, I cannot control what another woman does either, but I still feel uncomfortable also when someone is exposed.

 

[Sweet Leilani]

I'm curious when it became something to do in public. There are many places with public restrooms that offer a little sitting room for this type of purpose.

I think Lauren has a good point here. I finished breastfeeding my son about 5 months ago (when he was 14 months old) and I went out of my way to a) find a private place to do it and b) try to schedule public outings around his feedings. I can't remember a single instance where I had to "whip it out in public" and I was working and taking the baby along to my job on public transportation. I can imagine that it could happen to other people in an emergency, but as a regular occurance, it just wasn't an issue for us. Personally, I think I would have a great deal of trouble with successful "letdown" if there were other people gaping at me.

 

[The Reno Kid]

I don't like it. I don't believe a woman's breast is appropriate to display in public. I was confronted by this just a couple of days ago and it shook me up a little. I am a pretty conservative guy and I was raised with a set of values that in many quarters today are considered "old fashioned." There are other reasons, but I'm not sure that's even the point. What it comes down to is it's okay to offend some groups (e.g. those with conservative social views) but not okay to offend others (e.g. anyone else). In fact, as one member said earlier in this thread:

Rebecca D
...wondering when "old fashioned" will no longer be justification for ugly views...

How utterly dismissive! My views are not just different, they are downright ugly. I must be ashamed to call them my own! My point is, I (and others here) do believe it's inappropriate to conduct some perfectly natural activities in public. Others have stated the reasoning behind them--modesty, sexuality, etc.--better than I can. But the attitude exemplified above indicates not just an inability to listen to this side of the debate, but also the belief that the other side should not be listened to. Dangerous ground in a free society. Please correct me if I mistook your meaning.

 

[mysterygal]

Not to be a smart aleck, but "what age should it end?" What if a woman is breastfeeding a 4 year old?[huh]

I agree with Veronica...it's just wrong for a 4yr old to still be breastfeeding, the kid has teeth and should be eating solid foods! I never went until they were 1yrs old even...by the time they started getting teeth, that's when it's not so pleasant Any kid over the age of 2 and still breastfeeding, I start raising some eyebrows...really, when the kid is one years old, they can very easily drink from a sippy cup and start eating baby foods...there's little need to keep going on and on with it.

 

[Rosie]

The only reason breastfedding in public causes such emotions is because of the sexualization of the breast in this country. There are many countries where women walk around topless all of the time without a problem, it isn't seen as inappropriate, it just is. If anyone is offended by seeing a woman breastfeed then DON'T LOOK! It really is that simple, turn your head and your eyes in another direction or leave wherever it is you are, presto! no more being subjected to the evil that breastfeeding seems to be. Another thing, no one can determine how old is "too old" for a child to breast feed other than the child and the mother. Saying it should stop at age 1 or 18 months or whatever is silly, plain and simple, when the child is ready to wean from the breast he or she will. And calling breastfeeding a feminist thing is silly, the only reason women have breasts it to breast feed, they aren't there to be pretty or fill out a sweater nicely, or be a play thing for men, they are to provide food for infants and children, simple and to the point. To compare breastfeeding to defecating is silly and childish, they cannot be compared. When I have children, I will breast feed them for as long as they want to be breast fed and I will feed them when they are hungry no matter where we are and no matter who is around. I actually dare someone to say something negative to me about it. If I am labeled a feminist, ah well. Live your life the way you see fit as I will live mine.

 

[The Reno Kid]

If anyone is offended by seeing a woman breastfeed then DON'T LOOK! It really is that simple, turn your head and your eyes in another direction or leave wherever it is you are, presto! no more being subjected to the evil that breastfeeding seems to be.

I beg to differ. Take for example the situation that confronted me in Ikea last Friday. My wife and I walked over to a display to look at some furniture when a woman sat down in one of the display chairs, popped out a breast and began to feed her child. I found it offensive. I was on a very limited timeline (having driven to Sacramento from Reno) and I particularly wanted to look at the desplay this woman was occupying. I didn't look because I felt that I would be violating this woman's privacy.

What you facetiously refer to as "the evil that breastfeeding seems to be..." seems to me to be just another way of dismissing the other side's views without really bothering to consider them. I think breastfeeding is a wonderful and a beautiful thing, but not a public activity. It's not the act that I object to. It's the in-your-face, I-have-every-right-to-do-anything-I-want-whatever-anyone-else-thinks attitude that irks me. I realized I am not the center of the universe.

When I was 12, I would have considered it an absolute laff-riot to emit an ear-splitting belch in a movie theater. As I grew older I realized that the offense this simple bit of childish humor gave to others rendered it very unfunny. In my book a gentleman (or a lady) seeks not to offend others, if it can be helped--regardless of whether he or she agrees with the attitude that is offended. This occasionally requires small sacrifices on our parts. But that's what makes it easier for us all to live together on such a small planet. To me, it's just basic manners. I hope this makes sense.

I'll get off my soapbox now.

 

[Veronica Parra]

To me, there is something offensive about breastfeeding -- but it isn't the act itself, nor is it the person that engages in it. The offensive element of breastfeeding is a man, or a teenage boy, who leers at a woman feeding her baby, thus sexualizing a totally nonsexual act. As a woman, I would feel very uncomfortable under pairs of eyes staring salaciously at me and my baby.

.

 

[Rosie]

What you facetiously refer to as "the evil that breastfeeding seems to be..." seems to me to be just another way of dismissing the other side's views without really bothering to consider them. I think breastfeeding is a wonderful and a beautiful thing, but not a public activity. It's not the act that I object to. It's the in-your-face, I-have-every-right-to-do-anything-I-want-whatever-anyone-else-thinks attitude that irks me. I realized I am not the center of the universe.

I am not dismissing other people's feelings or thoughts. You say breastfeeding shouldn't be done in public so should a mother whose child becomes hungry in public not feed her child because she may offend you or others in some way?

I assume you eat in restaurants, are you offended to see people eating in public? Children need to eat and when their mothers choose to breastfeed, it sometimes may happen in public. People enjoy meals in the park, in restaurants at sidewalk cafes, they are not made to go to a special hidden room to take their meal and neither should children.

I assume (please correct me if I'm wrong) that you are offended by breast feeding because a woman's breast is exposed. Breasts = sex or sexuality to you (again, assuming, correct if wrong). Obviously in the context of feeding a child, sexuality is or at least should be taken away. If a woman took off her cardigan and her arms were exposed would you be offended? The breast is a part of the woman's body and if she is feeding her child, there isn't anything wrong with seeing that. Now, if said woman were to strip naked somewhere running the streets or were exposing her breasts in a sexual manner, that would be wrong. Using the breasts for their purpose, to provide nourishment and sustenance for a child is fine and should be fine. What attitude is a mother expressing when she is feeding her child, the attitude that she wants to be a good mother? That she doesn't want her child to be hungry?

 

[Rosie]

To me, there is something offensive about breastfeeding -- but it isn't the act itself, nor is it the person that engages in it. The offensive element of breastfeeding is a man, or a teenage boy, who leers at a woman feeding her baby, thus sexualizing a totally nonsexual act. As a woman, I would feel very uncomfortable under pairs of eyes staring salaciously at me and my baby.

.

I agree with Veronica on this and this is the reason that people seem to have a problem with breast feeding. They are afraid of the emotions, feelings, whatever that men and boys will feel when seeing these women showing what is perceived to be a sexual organ. In some countries a woman's knees are seen as an excitement point or the back of the neck and so these parts of a woman's body are not shown. We happen to live in a country (one of only a few I might add) that find the breast sexually pleasing and this brings with it a slew of feelings about breastfeeding. As I've stated before if you have a problem with it then leave the area. No one is forcing anyone to do anything they don't like. That is the beauty of this country.

 

[Rosie]

When I was 12, I would have considered it an absolute laff-riot to emit an ear-splitting belch in a movie theater. As I grew older I realized that the offense this simple bit of childish humor gave to others rendered it very unfunny. In my book a gentleman (or a lady) seeks not to offend others, if it can be helped--regardless of whether he or she agrees with the attitude that is offended. This occasionally requires small sacrifices on our parts. But that's what makes it easier for us all to live together on such a small planet. To me, it's just basic manners. I hope this makes sense.

I'll get off my soapbox now.

Belching out loud and feeding a child are on two different scales and cannot be compared. A mother feeding her child in public is equated to a immature child? Come, come now. Tell the child to make the small sacrfice of missing lunch or dinner because you are offended by their mommy's breast.

 

[Veronica Parra]

Belching out loud and feeding a child are on two different scales and cannot be compared.

I'm still recovering from a comparison made between breastfeeding and defecating. I can imagine what those people think of topless beaches along the Mediterranean.

 

[ClassicIsBetter]

This country is the most obese country in the world, in no way will a child die of starvation because of a missed feeding. A person is at home far more than not, either carry a bottle or go somewhere private. What is socially acceptable here won't be somewhere else, therefore arguments that "Well, this country does it" is baseless and not effective. Society at large has all but declared that breastfeeding is something that shouldn't be done in public. It just is. It's not illegal. If you want to breastfeed your child in public, with no attempt to hide it or be classy about it or go somewhere more private if possible, then by God, have at it. Apparently this country is no longer about being considerate of others. It's all about each person as an individual and not as an individual that is part of a collective whole. But that's a different argument that probably needs a thread of its own.