Big Weddings, are they still around?????

[Tommy Fedora]

I would expect to go for up to about 30k for a guest list of 150. Much too much for one afternoon's entertainment regardless of the occasion. Pure insanity. She's an attorney so she could probably help but I doubt if I would ask her. Luckily, he has a really small family in Maine. In fact, I like him more already.

 

[texasgirl]

I just got married in March and we had a beautiful wedding with about 75 guests for about 5K. We had several people come up to us at the reception and tell it was one of the nicest weddings they'd ever been to. There are definitely ways to cut costs, and like GoldLeaf we paid cash for everything, no reason to go into debt- that's not a good way to start a marriage IMO.

 

[jamespowers]

Up here in Maine, the hippies are carnivorous. You gotta watch it when you go walking in the woods -- sometimes they attack without provocation!!

Damned hippies.

 

[jamespowers]

Well, Jack's thread about funerals got me thinking. Do people still have big weddings with the 6 bridesmaids and ushers, the flower girls, ringboy and 200-300 guests?????? When was the last time anyone here went to a big wedding?

It seems like the Golden Era was full of big weddings.

Do you have to ask? Well, that's right, you didn't make it to mine.
There were enough people, live band etc, etc.

Regards,

J

P.S. And yes the monetary figure is about right for today's dollars.

 

[Paisley]

I would expect to go for up to about 30k for a guest list of 150. Much too much for one afternoon's entertainment regardless of the occasion. Pure insanity.

That's always been my feeling about it, too. I'd much rather have that for a nest egg.

Since I don't have any plans to get married, I've been saving for a trip to Hawaii for my 40th birthday.

 

[jamespowers]

Since I don't have any plans to get married, I've been saving for a trip to Hawaii for my 40th birthday.

To find a husband? I had to ask.

Regards,

J

 

[Paisley]

I haven't lost one.

 

[jamespowers]

I haven't lost one.

lol lol lol lol lol lol lol I knew you would respond to that well.

Regards,

J

 

[BegintheBeguine]

Wedding Industry

When I was engaged to a native New Yorker whose parents were off the Pan-Am from Italy, he insisted on a huge wedding at their old church in Astoria, Queens. Forgot where the huge reception was going to be in that particular fantasy. My dad certainly didn't want to pay for that kind of ostentatious display. Fiance bought me a beautiful vintage engagement ring, though, which of course I gave back when we called it off. He's over 40 now and still not married. [huh]
Seems like an awful waste of money, having a big wedding, when there are so many easy, tasteful ways to economize.

 

[Paisley]

lol lol lol lol lol lol lol I knew you would respond to that well.

Regards,

J

I'm only looking for a mate in my sock drawer now, remember?

 

[jamespowers]

I'm only looking for a mate in my sock drawer now, remember?

Yep, I somehow remember that one. Any luck?

Regards,

J

 

[Paisley]

fftopic:

All socks are present and accounted for. :icon_smil

 

[Senator Jack]

When I was a kid, all the 'connected' Italians had the big weddings, and the honest lot (we and our ilk) had what they called 'football weddings.' That is, they'd rent out the local Sons of Italy hall, and on each table there'd be a pile of wrapped up sandwiches. If your table didn't have a a roast beef sandwich, for example, then you'd ask the next table, 'Hey, you got a roast beef over there?', and someone would look through the pile, grab one, and throw you a pass - hence the term 'football weddings'. Hey, we might not have had much class, but at least we made our wedding were legally funded.


Regards,

Senator Jack

 

[jamespowers]

When I was a kid, all the 'connected' Italians had the big weddings, and the honest lot (we and our ilk) had what they called 'football weddings.' That is, they'd rent out the local Sons of Italy hall, and on each table there'd be a pile of wrapped up sandwiches. If your table didn't have a a roast beef sandwich, for example, then you'd ask the next table, 'Hey, you got a roast beef over there?', and someone would look through the pile, grab one, and throw you a pass - hence the term 'football weddings'. Hey, we might not have had much class, but at least we made our wedding were legally funded.


Regards,

Senator Jack

Legally funded. lol lol lol lol
I guess you didn't marry Tony Sopranos daughter then?

Regards,

J

 

[Senator Jack]

What the hell was that last sentence I wrote? Were made legally funded? Huh? i can't be bothered to edit it now.

 

[Babydoll]

I just got married in March and we had a beautiful wedding with about 75 guests for about 5K. We had several people come up to us at the reception and tell it was one of the nicest weddings they'd ever been to. There are definitely ways to cut costs, and like GoldLeaf we paid cash for everything, no reason to go into debt- that's not a good way to start a marriage IMO.

We did the exact same thing. 75 guests, $5k. It's such a relief to start married life *without* the wedding debt looming over us!

(Oh, and we each had three attendants. Not too big.)

 

[jamespowers]

What the hell was that last sentence I wrote? Were made legally funded? Huh? i can't be bothered to edit it now.

Don't bother the meaning came through just fine.

Regards,

J

 

[Lincsong]

Do you have to ask? Well, that's right, you didn't make it to mine.
There were enough people, live band etc, etc.

Regards,

J

P.S. And yes the monetary figure is about right for today's dollars.

You know I couldn't stand to be in the same room as Lou!:rage:

 

[Lincsong]

bahahahahahahahahha

When I was a kid, all the 'connected' Italians had the big weddings, and the honest lot (we and our ilk) had what they called 'football weddings.' That is, they'd rent out the local Sons of Italy hall, and on each table there'd be a pile of wrapped up sandwiches. If your table didn't have a a roast beef sandwich, for example, then you'd ask the next table, 'Hey, you got a roast beef over there?', and someone would look through the pile, grab one, and throw you a pass - hence the term 'football weddings'. Hey, we might not have had much class, but at least we made our wedding were legally funded.


Regards,

Senator Jack

Jack, you're killing me here. bahhahahhaahhahahahaha oh my gut, oh my gut (as I roll on the floor in laughter)

Out in this neck of the woods, people would rent out the local Holy Ghost Hall. When my friends sister got married they had it at the Holy Ghost Hall, and the hall had a picture of a certain President on the wall. The picture was screwed to the wall to prevent theft. My friends grandpa hated this certain President with a passion. When his Dad looked he saw grandpa with a crowbar trying to pry the picture off the wall. "Dad, Dad you can't do that. They'll charge me for the damages". "I'll pay for it, I don't want that ba#$$#'s picture at the wedding". His Dad ended up covering the picture with an American Flag.

 

[GoldLeaf]

I would expect to go for up to about 30k for a guest list of 150. Much too much for one afternoon's entertainment regardless of the occasion. Pure insanity. She's an attorney so she could probably help but I doubt if I would ask her. Luckily, he has a really small family in Maine. In fact, I like him more already.

Yikes! If you have that kind of money, more power to you! Of course, you have to make the decision - do you want to use credit? I personally wouldn't use credit for a wedding. It just makes it cost that much more because of the interest rates. Personally, if my parents had offered me 30k, I would have spent the 4k all the same, and then invested the remainder.

As for asking your daughter to contribute, you don't have to ask. Once she finds out what her budget is, she can either stay within it, or go above it at her own cost. That isn't asking, that is her making a decision, and you standing firm on what you will spend.

one afternoon's entertainment

To me, a wedding isn't "entertainment". It isn't like going to a concert or a play. Guests shouldn't have an expectation of being "entertertained." That is selfish, in my mind. A wedding isn't a circus. A wedding, in my mind, should be all about the union. The reception afterward shouldn't be the focus, and to so many people, it is the most important part of the entire day. Some couples can't wait to get smashed so that they can't even remember their wedding day [huh]

So, I guess, if the shin-dig is what is the most important, then yeah, you are going to end up spending a small fortune. If the ceremony, the union, and their new life together is the focus, you can get away with spending a lot less. I kept my reception low key and my ceremony long so that when people thought of they day, they would think of the union, not my food.

It is a matter of values. I happen to have very .... conservative? views about weddings. Old fashioned? I don't really know what my views are. I just don't place much stock in material things and appearances. The most important things to me are contained within my soul. And if people can't see how beautiful I am within, no ammount of stuff will ever convince them. No display of wealth, real or borrowed, will ever convince anyone that I am better than the person I contain within. Nor will it convince someone that my relationship with my husband is as beautiful as my table decorations if really, at its core, it is rotten. See me and my relationship for what it is: pure, beautiful, spiritual, profound, respectful. Glitz and forced elegance just makes people see money or blinds them from the truth, which may be the goal.

I really am an odd duck, aren't I?