30's Gentlemen's Etiquette

[Derek WC]

These young women may not be waiting for you to offer your hand, they may just not have shaking hands in their learned behaviours.

Good point there. I hadn't really learned hand shaking etiquette until last summer (Also before I got into the Golden Era) when I visited family in Wisconsin from my Grandpa.

 

[Talbot]

One old school etiquette rule I find tedious these days (in regards to meeting women) is the one where a man is not supposed to shake a woman's hand unless she offers her hand first.

Shaking their hand when they haven't offered it doesn't really work.

Believe me, I tried.

Come to think of it, it didn't work for Larry Fine either...

 

[chanteuseCarey]

A woman who approaches a man is a hussy, not a lady!

P, I hope you typed this with tongue firmly planted in cheek! In my adult life I have, in the proper social context approached men to engage them in conversation, and will even ask them to dance- if in an applicable situation. I usually as a way to introduce myself, will offer my hand in a handshake position while looking them in the eyes, tell my name and ask for thiers. I always get my hand shaken back and given their name in reply, more often than not with an added "very pleased to meet you.", or as it was the case just this past Saturday evening, a comment was also made about my firm, strong handshake. I find that Gentlemen are flattered and appreciative of a Lady (I have never been treated as anything else by a man) that notices them and finds them interesting enough to want to meet them and talk with them.

 

[chanteuseCarey]

These young women may not be waiting for you to offer your hand, they may just not have shaking hands in their learned behaviours.

A good point P, I shall add this to the learned behaviours I am teaching/training my now 16 yo daughter.

 

[chanteuseCarey]

One old school etiquette rule I find tedious these days (in regards to meeting women) is the one where a man is not supposed to shake a woman's hand unless she offers her hand first.

If the man initiated by offering his hand in a handshake position and introduced himself thusly, I would respond by shaking it - and not see it as rude, forward, or inappropriate, as I do that myself.

 

[Foofoogal]

One old school etiquette rule I find tedious these days (in regards to meeting women) is the one where a man is not supposed to shake a woman's hand unless she offers her hand first.
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This is the one I hold on to the most. Drives me nuts when men stick out their hand first. I get ecstatic when I meet an older man and he knows the drill.

I think since society correctness (sic) took away my Honey, Sugar and Darling I hold on to this one for dear life.

 

[MikeBravo]

I grew up thinking that women didn't shake hands, except when passing the peace in church. It has only been since starting work in offices that I have begun to (and I usually offer my hand because it irritates me when a handshake is assumed between and not with me - and worse, when the men shake hands with each other but try to kiss me). These young women may not be waiting for you to offer your hand, they may just not have shaking hands in their learned behaviours.

In business/workplace I don't believe it is ever acceptable for kissing to take place. I always shake hands with the men and with a woman only if she offers her hand. I believe this has always been the etiquette to wait for the lady to offer her hand first. A few years ago a female work colleague/friend mentioned that I only shook hands with one woman (there were no men in the office) when being introduce. I replied "that's because she offered it to me"

 

[LizzieMaine]

A gentleman does nothing to make the people around him feel uncomfortable or inferior.

There's a story about a nouveau-riche type being invited to an old-money dinner party, and having no idea what to do with the finger bowl. So he shrugged, and drank it. His host saw him do this, and rather than criticise him for it, he drank his own. That's a true gentleman in action.

 

[Tomasso]

That's a true gentleman in action.

Sure, but now you've got a guy drinking out of finger bowls for the rest of his life or even worse you've started a trend.


Brings to mind......

[video=youtube;1LV0ondJXMs]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1LV0ondJXMs[/video]

 

[Michael Carter]

That is an awkward situation. While the host may be a gentleman, some of his guests may not have been paying attention to his gesture. Now the guest is wondering why everyone else has their fingers in their 'water' bowls.

Difficult to excuse yourself and ask your guest to accompany you out of ear shot of the others without raising at least a few eyebrows.

As a host or a guest I hope I never find myself in that spot.

 

[Derek WC]

Pardon me, but what's a finger bowl?

 

[Tomasso]

One word, Derek......GOOGLE....

 

[Pompidou]

Now fifty words, Derek: A finger bowl is a bowl of water, usually with lemon or flower petals, which is used for rinsing one's fingers in between courses in a multiple course meal. It is typically served before the dessert course, on a doily on top of the dessert plate.

 

[Puzzicato]

Surely when it is served depends on what else has been served? I don't want to wait until dessert to rinse my fingers if I was shelling prawns as an appetiser!

 

[Derek WC]

Thank's, Pompidou.

Google's for chumps.

 

[MikeBravo]

Thank's, Pompidou.

Google's for chumps.

I found Fedora Lounge on Google, chump

 

[Pompidou]

Surely when it is served depends on what else has been served? I don't want to wait until dessert to rinse my fingers if I was shelling prawns as an appetiser!

That could be. I googled finger bowl and copy-pasted the wiki entry.

 

[Widebrim]

One old school etiquette rule I find tedious these days (in regards to meeting women) is the one where a man is not supposed to shake a woman's hand unless she offers her hand first.

True, unless you're in the Middle East.

 

[Puzzicato]

That could be. I googled finger bowl and copy-pasted the wiki entry.

I suppose at a very fancy dinner you wouldn't be serving messy food anyway, the finger bowl would be just an embellishment.

 

[Talbot]

Not really messy I suppose, but I have been told the correct way to eat asparagus at dinner was with your fingers.