Want to buy or sell something? Check the classifieds
  • The Fedora Lounge is supported in part by commission earning affiliate links sitewide. Please support us by using them. You may learn more here.

Vintage on a First Date: Do or Don't?

jitterbugdoll

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,042
Location
Soon to be not-so-sunny Boston
If wearing vintage is something that is an important part of you, then by all means dress accordingly for a first date or otherwise. You have excellent taste Daisy, and are a real class act, and if this fellow is interested in you, he'll think you are an absolute doll no matter what you wear. He already has some inkling of your hobby, and he finds it interesting, so I am sure he will appreciate your choice of ensembles.

For me, I always dress vintage, so I am dressed in such for a first date or otherwise. I can honestly say that the look has always been well received, regardless of whether the gentleman was into vintage/dressed in vintage himself. I find that many men appreciate a well-dressed women who embraces her feminine side, as it is so very different then what the average women wears today, and different can be very good.

The important thing to remember is that if dressing vintage is important to you, and your date writes you off because of your outfit, then he is not the person for you. ;)
 

Maj.Nick Danger

I'll Lock Up
Messages
4,469
Location
Behind the 8 ball,..
jitterbugdoll said:
If wearing vintage is something that is an important part of you, then by all means dress accordingly for a first date or otherwise. You have excellent taste Daisy, and are a real class act, and if this fellow is interested in you, he'll think you are an absolute doll no matter what you wear. He already has some inkling of your hobby, and he finds it interesting, so I am sure he will appreciate your choice of ensembles.

For me, I always dress vintage, so I am dressed in such for a first date or otherwise. I can honestly say that the look has always been well received, regardless of whether the gentleman was into vintage/dressed in vintage himself. I find that many men appreciate a well-dressed women who embraces her feminine side, as it is so very different then what the average women wears today, and different can be very good.

The important thing to remember is that if dressing vintage is important to you, and your date writes you off because of your outfit, then he is not the person for you. ;)

My sentiments exactly. Just be yourself. I am absolutely floored when I see a gal that actually took the time to look her best, and different from the basic slouch look that is so prevalent today. Trendiness has always bored me, but a lady that dresses like a lady is way-interesting. Not necessarily overdone and over accessorized, but elegant. :)
 

BitterEpiphany

Familiar Face
Messages
56
Location
Chicago, IL
I think the real question is, how do you feel most comfortable?

Some people like wearing vintage clothes and red lipstick out on the town, not because it makes them feel 'like themselves' but because it makes it feel a little bit more like a show - like they can be something they might not always be. If you're funnier, more confident and more comfortable in a vintage look, then you'd be remiss to wear anything else.

If the guy is worth his salt and he's enamoured by your personality, he's going to be able to get past whatever you're wearing.

My reccomendation, from a non-intimidating fashion point of view, however, would be to go vintage light. Take the hair a little more subtley - don't go all out vintage with the look and leave the red lipstick and the pearls at home. Those are things people are not at all used to seeing these days and I will probably offset his balance a little bit. If you love your Bakelite jewelery, wear it, of course, but pair it with a modern-ish outfit that has a few other vintage nods.

My two cents really come down to however you're most comfortable. If you're going to be preoccupied by whether or not he thinks your 'hobby' has taken over your life, you might want to just leave a vew vintage nods in your look and go with a more modern feel. But, if you're going to feel like a prim and proper lady in your retro gear, don't wear something else!
 

jitterbugdoll

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,042
Location
Soon to be not-so-sunny Boston
don't go all out vintage with the look and leave the red lipstick and the pearls at home.

Red lipstick and pearls are always classic, in my opinion. Red lipstick is touted every season as the perfect look; it can be both glamorous and over the top or understated and elegant, depending on how you choose to wear it.

My point is, be who you are. If dressing vintage is who you are, why pretend to be something you are not?
 

ohairas

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,000
Location
Missouri
Daisy I'd definitely go vintage... either the cardigan outfit or a simple dress as you said.

I say let him get to know "the real you" right away. I'm sure he'll find you fascinating. If things don't work out romantically for you two, you will still always leave a vintage tug on his heart I'm sure! It will make the date more fun than if you just wore modern clothes, "like everyone else".

Who knows, he might have a flower to put in your hair!

Were did you meet?
Have fun and keep us posted!

Nikki
 

Amy Jeanne

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,858
Location
Colorado
I guess you're getting this answer from a lot of people, but I'll say it anyway :)

Dress accordingly, but with a vintage flair. I trust that you'll look killer no matter what! If your date likes it and he's more interested in it than you expected, break out the big guns on the second date!! Hope it goes well for you.
 
G

GoldLeaf

Guest
Common response: Do what would make you feel the most comfortable.

I remember a first date I had when I was a punk with a mohawk. I wanted him to be able to see me for who I was, first, and as a punk, second, as he wasn't a punk. The sides of my mohawk had gotten quite long, so the hair cut wasn't obvious at first glance and it was dyed black. So I pulled my hair into a french twist. I wore all black: jeans with a tailored suit jacket and my combat boots. I was obviously not your run of the mill girl, but I didn't completely change who I was.

For our second lunch date, I showed up with the most outlandish outfit that I had. He had to know I was always going to be me, and he would either accept that, or not. He did. Of course, with hindsight being what it is, I rather wish I had scared him off lol

I did what was the most comfortable for me, while remaining true to who I was. I am a bit over the top and dramatic, and I thrive when I attract attention. I wouldn't hesitate to wear all vintage if it made me feel good. A woman is her most attractive when she thinks she is attractive.

I think I have seen you post a very attractive suit at some time. I would wear that with some jewelry, as a classic suit never goes out of style. Classy, elegant, and vintage, which seems to be who you are. True to yourself without screaming for attention. If you wore the suit with a sweet blouse, you could remove the jacket if the dining establishment was less formal.

Of course, I am married and haven't dated in 6 years :D
 

Cheesecakecutie

Familiar Face
Messages
96
Location
Jolly England
Well Daisy,,If it were me i think i would want to be who i truly am.You love vintage and it makes you feel lovely...why deny yourself that when it makes you feel good. It is important that anyone who is going to be part of your life sees you in all your glory.:eek:fftopic: I however have total nightmares over what to wear..but on a more extreme level...this week it is a decision over to wear sexy paisley fishnet tights with a pair of moulin rouge style frilly Knickers, and a kind of air hostess very fitted, cleavage enhancing jacket and a pill box hat with feathers and a veil:D ..also of course very high heeled T bar shoes and a to die for vintage paste diamond choker....or do i go for the sweet yellow fifties dress with full skirt white little gloves , gorgeous vintage lemon patent shoes, and a white pill bow hat with feathers and a veil:p

I am attending a crazy vintage burlesque night at the coronet in London to celebrate Valentines with my man. EVERYONE dresses up and pulls out all the stops.

Back to your dilema...I suggest see how you feel on the day.You have been given lots of wonderful advice from all the gals but....you may and I can have a total change of mind at the very last minute and always feel better for my new decsion .
Enjoy yourself and relax about it as long as you are open and real with eachother i don't think it matters what you are wearing. You'll know if he is right for you no matter what clothing you have on...Go for it girl;)
 

RetroModelSari

Practically Family
Messages
863
Location
Duesseldorf/Germany
I agree with the girls about wearing something that shows the real you. Daisy, I´d say stick to your own suggestions cause those sound really good to me, plus you gonna feel the best with something you would have chosen for a nice evening anyway. I hope you will have a wonderfull and pleasant evening!!!!! :)
 

Daisy Buchanan

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,332
Location
BOSTON! LETS GO PATRIOTS!!!
Thanks so much for all of your useful imput. I'm going to wear a dress, with FF stockings, I'm just on the fence as to which dress it will be. It's either gonna be vintage or a vintage repro. It's all gonna depend on the weather too, since it is supposed to be very cold.

I have a thing about red lipstick. I love it and I wear it. But, we are going out to dinner, and there is nothing worse than seeing a ladies red lipstick smudged all over her napkin. And of course there might just be a kiss goodnight. This man might not be used to kissing a woman with bright red lips, and will probably be wondering how on earth he's gonna manage doing it without ending up looking like a clown. I have a gloss that is a red tone, but not nearly as smudgey as the matte reds that I have, so I think I will go for that. I think I'll have to ease him into the matte reds.

But, I think he will like my vintage outfit. I think FF stockings are a bit flirty, which is all I want to be on the first date. But, I know many men who find them nice. Now I just have to prevent myself from fussing with them all night and checking to see if my seams are straight!! I've worn them a hundred times, but I still worry about straight seams. I've promised myself that I will ignore them. I will use the restroom before we leave the restaurant to make sure that all under things are in the right position!!
Gonna do my hair vintage-ish. Kind of like what it is in my avatar, but less the hat. Like a tamed down victory roll. And I'm definitely wearing a dainty pearl necklace with a little heart clasp and a matching bracelet, a right hand ring. Leaving the vintage watch behind, it's just too dressy. Now, I'm just praying that it's not too icy for I really want to wear these cute t-strap shoes, but if it's icy, I'm gonna have to wear something a bit more practical. I do have a back up, so I"m not worried. Besides, he's not much taller than me, which is actually a good thing. That means I won't feel obligated to kill myself in 4 inch heels! 2 inches will still leave me shorter than him, but at a nice eye level.
Now if only I could decide which dress! And not find another one in my closet that could be a contender too:)
 

Clara Noir

Familiar Face
Messages
92
Location
Old South Wales (UK)
I'm glad you seem to be sorted for your date!

If it's down to just choosing a frock, I'd suggest repro. Some proper vintage can be a little flouncy, and if you don't know where you're going you may want to bear that in mind. I think repro can be a bit more commonplace, in a good way. It is also a good excuse ...um... reason to buy a new dress :eusa_clap
 

Paisley

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,439
Location
Indianapolis
"Even those who want to dig deeper have to start with the surface." -Miss Manners.

Bearing that in mind, I'd meet someone for the first time wearing something that shows what I'm like, rather than serves as a distraction. Even if someone really likes you, a really unusual outfit can put them off.
 

frontmanvintage

New in Town
Messages
29
Location
KS
Be yourself

You've got to be yourself whether its a first date or fourteenth. I think your idea of a beaded cardigan with an A-line skirt is great for any venue: coffee, movies, dinner, etc.

Just remember: It's really hard to be overdressed for an occasion, but easy to be underdressed and embarrased.
 

BonnieJean

Practically Family
Messages
519
Location
east of Wichita
Daisy,
Any of your ideas for an outfit sounds divine to me. And like Lady Day, I love cardis! GoldLeaf is right: "A woman is her most attractive when she thinks she is attractive." There have been many times that I wore an outfit because I thought it was what I should wear and then I'd feel uncomfortable the whole evening. When I feel that I look good, it boosts my confidence.

My hubby now enjoys wearing "vintage" when we go out or even to church. He says the clothes are more comfortable. The only drawback with a husband that likes vintage clothes is that he's taking over the closet with all the new stuff he's been acquiring! He already has 2 pairs of nice vintage-y shoes and thinks he needs another pair--different colors of course. He's got several suits now and I don't even know how many slacks and shirts he has. All I know is that I used to have a lot of room in the closet!:)

Wear your vintage clothing if that is part of who you are. If I were doing the dating scene again, I'd definitely wear it because that is me.
A worthy man will appreciate it.

And keep us posted here. Inquiring minds want to know!
 

ITG

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,483
Location
Dallas/Fort Worth (TEXAS)
Being that it is a first date, I think you need to keep 2 things in mind:
1. Dress comfortably. (You will most likely encounter a couple of awkward moments and dressing comfortably will help you feel more at ease or more yourself.)
2. Dress to impress. (Afterall, first impressions are the strongest. I still remember how my husband looked on our first date.)
 

manton

A-List Customer
Messages
360
Location
New York
Miss Neecerie said:
because face it....on a first date, you get about 10 seconds or less before the date decides you are their type looks wise. Probably less then 10....and if you arn't presenting what they would be interested in....you might as well head right home, as they will be checking out the waitress and anyone else female, instead of actually getting to know you are a person....
Are we really that bad? I don't think I am, but of course we all flatter ourselves.
 

manton

A-List Customer
Messages
360
Location
New York
Miss Neecerie said:
It was a generality....and in no way meant to implicate any of our fine members here, as I am sure you are all the exceptions to the rule.
I'm one of those who believes that generalities are usually pretty reliable. This puts me in a real bind.
 

Fleur De Guerre

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,056
Location
Walton on Thames, UK
Daisy Buchanan said:
This man might not be used to kissing a woman with bright red lips, and will probably be wondering how on earth he's gonna manage doing it without ending up looking like a clown.

Is there a way of doing it without looking like a clown? I tend to just not kiss my boyfriend when wearing red lipstick!
 

Staff online

Forum statistics

Threads
109,333
Messages
3,079,068
Members
54,279
Latest member
Sivear
Top