Silly but needed ?

[Foofoogal]

I have been on FL seemingly forever but still do not know and I am very sure many newbies do not know the answer to this ?

I know Powder room is basically for women but that men are not off limits if they act right unless specifically stated no men allowed.

With some of the other bars or threads are there some basically just for men?

I have posted a few times in some that I did not feel like I was supposed to be there like the outerwear one or one on cufflinks but do have ?'s from time to time.

Can there be some clarification from someone on the rules about mens rooms vs women.[huh]

 

[Pompidou]

I figured all the descriptors for subforums were jokes. I mean, they're just flavor text to keep a theme going. No men in the women's dressing room- pretty much. Anyone can post anywhere. That's what I thought. I haven't posted in the "ladies only" forum not out of fear that I'd get in trouble for doing so, but more that I'd have nothing to say - same with half the forums here that aren't so labelled.

 

[Geesie]

The forums are readable to not only members, but anyone who has an internet connection.

I have no qualms about posting in those forums or reading them - I do have a wife, after all.

And anyone who shows up saying something like "Hay girls show me your VINTAGE PANTIES" would probably be banned quickly.

So I guess what I'm saying is that anyone with a genuine reason to learn about a topic and who isn't vulgar can post and read wherever.

 

[Lady Day]

Its an unwritten rule of tact.
I would hope men would have the tact to know that a woman needs her space (and vice versa) and not think that everything requires their 2¢ (and vice versa).

Requested opinions are different, but just like getting the feel for a forum, I think the general feel of the only two designated women's rooms on a very, very large board (overwhelmingly men) are let the ladies have their space.

LD

 

[Miss Neecerie]

The forums are readable to not only members, but anyone who has an internet connection.

I have no qualms about posting in those forums or reading them - I do have a wife, after all.

And anyone who shows up saying something like "Hay girls show me your VINTAGE PANTIES" would probably be banned quickly.

So I guess what I'm saying is that anyone with a genuine reason to learn about a topic and who isn't vulgar can post and read wherever.

That's -almost- true.

There are threads in the Powder Room that are off limits to male posters.
Despite the ability of most guys to keep it non lecherous, women feel more comfortable talking about unmentionables without mAle posting in those threads. It's just an illusion of it being a girls only advice chat, since guys can read the threads, but it makes most of us more able to ask delicate questions.

Every room pretty much has a FAQ in a sticky at the top. There is also a main FL sticky. Very helpful reading

 

[LizzieMaine]

We specifically ask that men do NOT post in any threads related to lingerie, and with very rare exceptions, any post by a man in such a thread will be removed as soon as we see it. Other threads are made women only at our discretion -- the History of Birth Control thread is one such, as is the Pin Up thread, and threads relating to menstrual matters.

Men are welcome to post in other Powder Room threads if they have something worthwhile to contribute. Remember you are *guests* there, and behave accordingly. Or we'll hand you your hat and show you the door.

 

[Honey Bee]

I did post my question about men's T-shirts on the mens thread for I thought I needed a mans' opinion on that...I did begin to search their previous threads on undergarments but began to blush and just asked instead!

I guess as long as the comments to the ladies threads are respectful I'm ok with men posting a comment but this is not my place to allow it, it is the moderators and I need to be respectful of their guidelines. If I didn't agree with them, then I would PM a moderator and take it up privately.

"Discretion is the better part of valor."

My teeny two cents worth

 

[LizzieMaine]

I don't know of any "Men Only" threads -- as far as I'm concerned, though, if the fellas want them, they're welcome to them. Maybe they should have The Lodge Room, where they can dress up in funny hats and have initiations and hang a No Girls Allowed sign on the door.

 

[Yeps]

I like that idea. But I have been alternating between 6 and 80 at heart for a while now.

 

[Pompidou]

I can understand why women would want certain threads to be women only. I was just on google, and my own forums' admin control panel, because I wanted to see if it was possible to bar access to a forum based on gender, and I believe it is. I only put this on the table because, well, it's all good to say you don't want men visibly present in threads where you discuss various unmentionables, but honestly, all that really means is anyone so inclined will just be stalking your conversations silently, and that's even creepier, right?

Here's a link to a vBulletin mod that allows the staff to allow/bar access to specific forums based on information in your postbit (the poster info to the left of each post). http://www.vbulletin.org/forum/showthread.php?t=135742&highlight=gender

Here's a link to a vBulletin mod that allows the staff to add gender to the postbit. http://www.vbulletin.org/forum/showthread.php?t=231260&highlight=gender

If you all felt really secure in your privacy, you could post more and freer. I don't see it as a bad thing. I'm sure nobody sits around spying on your conversations, but well, if privacy wasn't on your mind, you'd allow us to post anyway. Might as well go all the way.

 

[LizzieMaine]

I'm happy to say most of the gents around here are very well behaved -- I think we've had to chuck out only a very few men for not behaving themselves in the PR. If a guy wants to eavesdrop on a thread he has no business in, we won't say anything unless he posts. But he shouldn't think we don't know he's there. If he makes a nuisance of himself, or if we get wind from one of the PR gals that something inappropriate is going on, we'll deal with it. We take very seriously the idea that the PR is a place where any woman can be comfortable posting.

 

[dhermann1]

When I make a post on a Powder Room thread, it's usually because the posting on the "New Posts" search, and didn't notice which forum it was on.
And of course I try to observe rules of decency and decorum. One thing that does sometimes bug me is that there are a lot of women who only post in the Powder Room, and don't seem to realize that the rest of the Lounge exists. (That's also true of other forums, of course.) The result is that sometimes topics that really are of general interest sit in the Powder Room for a while. I think our Bartenders (thanks Lizzie) do an excellent job of quickly recognizing such threads and moving them to other appropriate forums.
But maybe we do need a "He Man Woman Haters Club" forum! lol

 

[Dewhurst]

I don't know of any "Men Only" threads -- as far as I'm concerned, though, if the fellas want them, they're welcome to them. Maybe they should have The Lodge Room, where they can dress up in funny hats and have initiations and hang a No Girls Allowed sign on the door.

Hmm, makes you wonder if we males even want something like this.

We could have a private area regarding men's health and development (although I have noticed MANY women wishing to post in men's health related issues on the internet), but I'm way to squeamish to be useful.

Private areas are only a problem if they are a vehicle for masquerading discrimination (the harmful sort), and I don't believe anything like that is going on here on the Lounge.

 

[Pompidou]

I personally, have no use for a men's only area. If I won't say it in front of women, I won't post it on the internet. Why? Because it's not the replies that would be the problem. It'd be the whole world reading about it, mostly.

 

[Puzzicato]

The forums are readable to not only members, but anyone who has an internet connection.

Some of the forums on the lounge are only visible if you are logged in.

 

[Pompidou]

Observation Bar, Events and Classifieds are missing when not logged in.

 

[Foofoogal]

I am a woman so I know where to post as a woman.

I am trying to figure out if and or where it is pretty much only a mans world.
I am the last one on earth to state men don't need their own space like us women. I was raised in the south.
Hen parties.
I posted about prostate cancer and gave link to men as it is totally necessary and in honor of Twitch.

I mainly have a ? about cufflinks from time to time ( have quite a little collection going) and occasionally coats but feel funny going in the mens room or as I perceive it anyway.

 

[Baron Kurtz]

Put me in the "Not Bothered" camp.

I don't think any of the guys have any issue with women posting in ostensibly "male" threads - neckties, whatever.

I guess there are topics on which ladies will feel wrong if a man is watching, for which guys wouldn't have the same issue. Underwear show and tell would be a good example. That's exactly the kind of thing that guys will enjoy looking at, but propriety of the way the lounge works should keep them out of those threads (the female members here shouldn't be treated as sexual objects or objects of desire for male FLoungers). But the male underwear thread that was sadly taken over by knuckle dragging homophobes (there was a problem with silk, IIRC), I don't think any of the guys would have a problem with women looking. It wasn't show and tell, though.

I know we at one time had a male FLounger who had an incredible colection of women's vintage of all kinds and may have been a fashion historian. I think he may have been a cross-dresser or identified him/herself as transvestite/intersex. How do the ladies feel about someone who has thus mis-assigned or ambiguous/confused sexuality looking and posting in those threads? I can imagine female members of the British vintage community, certainly the ones I know, wouldn't care very much.

bk

 

[LizzieMaine]

I know we at one time had a male FLounger who had an incredible colection of women's vintage of all kinds and may have been a fashion historian. I think he may have been a cross-dresser or identified him/herself as transvestite/intersex. How do the ladies feel about someone who has thus mis-assigned or ambiguous/confused sexuality looking and posting in those threads? I can imagine female members of the British vintage community, certainly the ones I know, wouldn't care very much.

bk

We have a couple of members who fit this description, actually, and have taken posts by them in lingerie threads on a case-by-case basis. LD and I don't have any problem with their participation, and we've never had any complaints from any of the rank-and-file in the PR. They'd fall into the category of the rare exceptions that I mentioned earlier. And we don't tolerate any harrassment of them, any more than we'd allow our gals to be harrassed.

 

[Lady Day]

One thing that does sometimes bug me is that there are a lot of women who only post in the Powder Room, and don't seem to realize that the rest of the Lounge exists. (That's also true of other forums, of course.) The result is that sometimes topics that really are of general interest sit in the Powder Room for a while. I think our Bartenders (thanks Lizzie) do an excellent job of quickly recognizing such threads and moving them to other appropriate forums.

That bothers me too. And as you said, there are some folks who only post in hats and dont know of the larger forum.

We get a lot of non PR/general topic threads and if a thread becomes completely mixed company, its moved to a more appropriate area. If its just ladies chatting, then it tends to stay unless it actually could fit better in another forum.
LD